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First time posting
Hello, I am sitting right now at the hospital, watching my wife, my Love, my Light fade into darkness. She was diagnosed over a year ago with a particularly nasty case of AML. In the end, a nasty case of GVHD did her in. I am surrounded by friends and family and yet, I feel alone. I wish I could lay down with her so she…
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when is it time for inpaitent care
looking for advise on how to help care for father in law who lives alone we are dealing with state insurance and getting the fast answers that are no help
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New to forum...daughter has breast cancer
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being a caregiver for my mother is making me feel resentful and angry..
my mother has gbm grade 4...it has always just been me and her...i have 1 bro and 2 sisters all older...but they kind of put caring for her all on me probably because im the youngest and since she lives with me and im not married and dont have kids..they all are married with families...in the beginning it was hard finidng…
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Dying spouse hates me now.
My husband was diagnosed with stage 4 lung and brain cancer with multiple brain tumors on July 14th, and is now in the end of life stages. He has daily gone downhill these last two weeks, and can no longer stand up, even with help, and either can’t, or won’t talk to me. He has quit eating a couple of days ago, and barely…
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Caregiver and tired
Mom was diagnosed with breast cancer in April just before her 72nd birthday. Dad had a stroke a year earlier. I'm worn out. I'm getting behind in the housework. I try to do the right thing-after all, they took care of me when I was actively bipolar. Yet I end up feeling like nothing more than a good girl. Brother is too…
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The beginning and not sure what to expect.
My dad just got diagnosed with stage IV melanoma last month after breaking his femur due to a tumor that had weakedned it. It feels like we've been getting information piecemeal and we're at the point where they're trying to figure out what kind of treatment he is a candidate for. It's been my sister and I that have taken…
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Advice on newly diagnosed bf
Hello everyone!! I wanted some advice for the situation with my bf. Doctors accidentally found tumors and they were removed. (I told him it was God’s will that they were found by mistake) He told me everything was fine. About a month after the surgery he started acting strange after just meeting my kids and I thought he…
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Not sure what to do
This is my first post here, so my apologies if it is not in the right place. My mother was diagnosed with Stage 4 ovarian cancer a few years ago. At the time of diagnosis she had stopped eating and it took a long time before she was accuarately diagnosed and agreed to start treatment. She lost a lot of weight and was on…
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I have one nerve...
PSW, scheduled for three hours tonight, phoned to say she'd be here i 15 minutes BUT has a "heavy cold" and will try not to give it to my sister. Said she was actually not feeling well when here last night. WTF? Why, I asked, did you not call this morning for a sub? Oh, you'll never get a sub on a holiday weekend, she…
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Pushed to my limits
First time posting... Probably should have saught help years ago. I met my wife almost 8 years ago, she had multiple cancer spots and thankfully some have been successfully defeated. She takes her meds but doesnt talk about it... Only to remind me in an argument that she has cancer... Thinking i forgot. I have sacrificed…
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Is it just me?
Hi, it's late, I am tired and can't fall asleep. my life has turn upside down since my husband was diagnosed with two cancers since December of 2016. Parotid gland and rectal. a couple weeks before that I had decided to go back to school and become a hairdresser. The whole project is put on the back burner. I decided my…
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Treatment is done...feeling more stressed now
My husband just finished his treatment for stage 3 rectal cancer. He had 28 days of raditation and chemo, surgery which ended in permanent colostomy and then more radiation. He had his ct scans done and things look good at this point. This has been a journey to say the least. My issue right now is being critical of…
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Lost Wife
My 36 year old husband has stage 4 esophageal/gastric cancer. It's been less than 1 year since the first cancer cells were found. He had lost 20 lbs out of nowhere, so eventually his esophagus was biopsied. Since then, it's been the same story as everyone else. J tube, chemo, surgeries, IV food, side effects, etc. I find…
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How to handle "I won't be around for that"
My husband has Stage 4 prostate cancer with metastasis happening quickly to several organs, and is now exhausting treatments. I think we're looking at a year or so. I'd like some advice on how to respond when he says things like, "It is probably my last Christmas" or "I probably won't be around for that". Lately, nearly…
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Hard to watch
I seem to be the only one here. Makes sense - after 2am here in Ottawa. Sitting by my sister's bedside. Gave her meds (PO) at 1am, decided to sit with her until she fell asleep. Fifteen minutes later, vomiting. She's resting now - hurts to talk - doesn't want replacement meds subQ just yet. She's palliative but some days…
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spouse diagnosed eight months ago with metastasized small cell lung cancer
I have a lot of sensitive questions to ask about this disease that are hard to ask in front of my husband at doctor appointments. Any suggestions? Have any of you found support groups to be helpful for caregivers?
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anticipatory grief
Hi everyone I'm a newbie here, and I will start the caregiving 'journey' tomorrow. I always thought that journey was something to look forward to...not anymore. I think a new word needs to be used, since journey sounds too nice for what's coming. I don't mean to sound pessimistic- it's just that I'm so scared. Scared of…
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anticipatory grief
Hi everyone I'm a newbie here, and I will start the caregiving 'journey' tomorrow. I always thought that journey was something to look forward to...not anymore. I think a new word needs to be used, since journey sounds too nice for what's coming. I don't mean to sound pessimistic- it's just that I'm so scared. Scared of…
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My husband has MDS & preparing for stem cell transplant
Hi all, This is my first post here and I'm happy I found this place. (Is there also a chat room for us caregivers?) Anyway, my husband Brian was diagnosed with Myelodysplastic Syndrome (MDS) in June. We just found out this week that one of his sisters is a FULL match for a bone marrow/stem cell transplant. (Which is…
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FOR ALL THE CAREGIVERS FEELING BLUE, STRESSED, OR MISUNDERSTOOD
People in general do not understand what being a caregiver entails. Many of us are sleep deprived, stressed, anxious, and very few understand. I wanted to say to all of you, I understand how you feel. Here is a list of what I personally encounter, please feel free to add to the list. Family and Friends love to say if you…
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My Mom is gone
I found this forum during my own caregiving time with my Mom who battled BC, and I took great comfort in reading everyone's stories, shared in your pains and struggles, and appreciated all the advice and encouraging words. I hope by sharing some of my own here, it'll help give comfort to someone out there. April 2016 - Mom…
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Caregiver problem
My problem is a little different. My boyfriend of 12 years was recently diagnosed with gall bladder/liver cancer and I am going to be his primary caregiver. But I just discovered he has been cheating on me. I'm stunned and havent confronted him as he is having surgery in four days. But I feel like the floor has been pulled…
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Caregiver, Girl friend, breast cancer, more angry at me every day, now scary!
Hello, I feel bad about writing about my problem. I have ready so much with much much worse situations. Bare with me as I say, poor me. I feel this is so selfish. But I believe my relationship is over and I just want to understand what happened. I met her a little over a year ago. She was amazing and at the time we did not…
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Opioid addiction after being in remission 5+ years
My mom has survived stage 4 metastatic melanoma. She has been tumor free for 5+ years. Her various doctors have continued to prescribe her opioids and benzodiazepines along with a long list of other medications. The only chemo related side effects she has now is osteoarthriti. Has anyone else had a loved one addicted after…
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Financial Help for caregivers
Hello All I am the caregiver for my mother. I have been taking care of her for over 2 years. She was only supposed to live 6 months after being diagnosed but we have managed to keep her alive so far and fighting everyday for it. I have left my life and work in Europe and my family there(daughter/wife) as well to come back…
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my husband is doing so bad and just went to hospice
I just needed to vent and know that there are people that care. My husband had a really bad night last night. He was telling and confused and moving from place to place. This morning, he couldn't move. He couldn't walk. He was so confused and angry. I had to call hospice. He's there now and they say he's resting…
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Starting Chemo. What Questions to ask oncologist?
Hello, My father recently discovered his rare bile duct cancer has returned to a nearby lymph node. Bile duct cancer is a not curable and all we are left with is hope that the chemo will control the growth of the cancer. I am in a dilemma because my Italian parents are not open to natorpathic approaches nor do they seem to…
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Having a hard time as a caregiver
Friends, I've been having a tough time the past few weeks. Although my wife received an ok scan (things are stable), the stress is building. She's been fighting for over 6 years. It's the doctors that cause me stress. Their bed side manner is atrocious which makes it hard for me to stay positive for my self and my wife.…