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Young.. and very guilty - what can I do now?
Hi all, I wish I found this site earlier, it would have helped me realize that many of the emotions I've been feeling are normal and things perhaps wouldnt have gotten to the stage they are right now. I'm sorry this might be a long story, but I would really like to vent to people who can understand. I'm 26 and my boyfriend…
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How do you create intimacy
I am trying so hard to live a somewhat normal life with my husband with a trach with him in so much pain all the time. I try to rub his back or his legs and feet and he seems to resist every attempt of affection towards him. I have no idea what role to play anymore. I try to be a caregiver and he rejects me and says he can…
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Suggestion for caregivers struggling with their roles
Like you, I have a husband who has been fighting cancer (in his case its Leiomyosarcoma - rare and aggressive). He has had three surgeries and three different chemotherapies in the three and a half years since his diagnosis. I have taken on the role of caregiver, appointment scheduler, accompanying him to every appointment…
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My adult kids can't handle my grief
My husband has had cancer for three years, the last two in stage four. It is now inoperable following a liver resection and lots of chemo and radiation. I am so tired from dealing with our family deaths in the last five years (three parents and a sibling) that have involved ugly, slow deaths, that I feel I can hardly face…
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New to Caregivers Board, been posting in Lung Cancer Board since March 2011
Hello all, Since March 2011 I have been posting in the Lung Cancer Board about my husband Mark who was diagnosed on 3/3/11 with NSCLC with mets all along his aorta (and probably other places according to the PET scan). Prognosis is 9 months without chemo. He doesn't want to do chemo. As I have been typing my…
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Grad student out of state, dad with cancer, separated mum as caretaker
Hi there everyone. I've been struggling with a "solution" to this problem for a while now. Here's an abbreviated run down. My dad was diagnosed with colon cancer in April 2016 and shortly after with prostrate cancer as well. He's since had surgeries for removal (along with a colostomy bag) and is on his second round of…
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Private Message Spam
Hello everyone, Thank you to all of you who have alerted us to the PM spamming from earlier today. I apologize for the inconvenience. While we do have securities in place, we are not always able to catch all spam, and we are trying to figure out how this one got around our system. If you received a message from jegac1…
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Feeing lost
My husband is 36 years old and has been undergoing cancer treatment since 2013. He is terminally ill but still going through palliative treatment and some chemotherapy to try and prolong his life so far we have had 2 years of success. I am feeling lost lately because he has been more and more tired since starting this new…
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My son has breast cancer
My son has stage 4 breast cancer and has now developed leptomenengial carcinomatosis. The outlook is very bleak. He's had WBR, taken Taxotere, now he's on Xeloda and has an Omaya Resevoir in his head so they can administer cyterobine directly into his brain and spinal canal. Glenn is 44 years old and is bigger than life .…
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Advice and help needed. Please.
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Boyfriend left after depression from testicular cancer
Hey Everybody, I don't know what to do in this situation or what to think so here I am reaching out to others that may have had similar situations or may have something to offer. My boyfriend and I started dating in March last year. We were so happy and everything was great. We had discussed marriage and were planning on…
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Overwhelmed - Can I just vent to someone who won't judge me, for once???
I guess I should start off with our backstory: After a couple of appointments over the course of about a week that included two different cancer scans and a biospy, my mother in law was diagnoised with stage 4 lung cancer in both lungs and the lymphnods in March of 2015. When giving her diagnosis to us, they actually said…
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Need to know others are there
My husband is a 3-time cancer survivor, twice with Prostate and once with lung. He has had surgery and radiation for the prostate, each about 5-years apart. In between these treatments he was diagnosed with lung cancer and had a lobectomy. He has been in remission for 2 years. Perhaps as a result of the treatments and the…
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Trying hard not to let this get to me, looking for inspiration
Hi, I just signed up. My mom is stage 4 with breast cancer found in her liver and bone. She moved to be near me from Oregon. My brother is nowhere involved in this at all and the family has a long history of drama... So, now she is here with me and my family. And now, I'm the center of balance for my kids, my hubby, my…
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Mother is dying of Stage 4 bone and Breast cancer'
Hello everyone. I am new to this site. I need to find some help and support. My mother is on hospice and I am the main caregiver for her at home. I am living here in her home. Left my job to help her,because no one esle in the family could help full time.My mom wanted to come home. Do not have much support from other…
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Struggling to Care for Mother (vent)
My mother is stage 4 metastatic breast cancer that has spread to most of her bones and spine. I am her caregiver. I have a brother who is basically uninvolved. He visits her from time to time but doesn't help with her care. I also work full time and am gone about 11-12 hours a day and then have to run her household in my…
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Noise from pump
My brother has to wear a pump 3 days a week every other week and the clicking sound it makes is driving him crazy. He can't walk around with headphones all the time. Is there anything that I can buy for him that is made to go around the device to muffle the sound? I have been searching the internet and can't find anything.…
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I don't know what to cook for my mother (post chemo and bone marrow transplant)
Hello , I am taking care of my mom who had a bone marrow transplant done. She received chemo and is dealing with the side effects such as the metallic taste in the mouth. She is using plastic utensils and not metal anymore so that helps a little bit. But the food still tatses different and its hard for her to eat . We both…
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Caregiver for my grandma
Hi all, My grandma is 85 years old and is a dementia patient. She is currently staying with my mom, but since my mom is working, we need someone to take care of her while she is away. I suggested that we could hire a nanny to take care of her. So, planning to hire an in-home caregiver for her from C-Care health services in…
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My husband is home full time now on Disability since 06/2015
I am wondering how unusual this is. My husband is home full time now on Disability since 06/2015. He usually naps for a couple hours every day. There are days when he takes 2 naps a day and there are rare days when he takes none. I have encouraged him to take up a hobby or do volunteer work. His life revolves around just…
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Should I make the suggestion?
Hello all. First post here. A little background: My 36-year-old wife of 16 years was diagnosed last summer (at 35) with stage-4 colon cancer after giving birth to our second child. Actually she had to deliver two months early because of illness which we found out shortly after to be the cancer. Our first child passed away…
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Help I need some answers
My husband was told by the Dr Nov 1,3026 that they were 99% sure that he had lung cancer . Three day after that he had a spot removed on his right hip that sent that in for a biopsy and it came back as a secondary cancer . Since than he has had small lumps piping up on his shoulder and his leg and his stomachs . He has a…
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Wife was diagnosed in April-2016
My wife of 15 years was diagnosed with Stage 4 Colon cancer in April of this year and life as we once knew it was totally flipped upside down. Since she was diagnosed I have had to drastically alter our families way of life. We have a 9 year old and she has an 18 year old son from a previous marriage. My wife is only 40…
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My song for all of you
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DhX8kYb3jc0&feature=share Lay back, turn your speakers up a little with a glass of wine and enjoy. It's my blessing you all of you for your bravery, courage, diligence to those you love.
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She's gone
My wife died at 10:00 November 22nd. Her 2 adult chidren, their wifes, my daughter and myself were at her side. She died "Peacefully" (as if there is such a thing in death) but did not appear to suffer. I did my best to be her caregiver, it was an honor, a privilage to care for my soul mate. David
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The end is nearing
My wife was diagnosed one year ago (November 11th) with Leiomyosarcoma (very rare, go figure) We went to Stanford for clinical trials that did nothing. She opted for traditional chemotherapy knowing there was no chance of a cure and stopped last March because it made her too ill She has not eaten in 2 weeks. Sips of water…
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She passed away on friday
We took her to the ER on thursday as she was breathing harder than usual. She has been looped from the meds for a few weeks since her last hospital stay, inspite of my steadily reducing the doses. Tests and xrays were fine and they didn't see a reason to admit her. We brought her home and she died that night in her sleep.…
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So, today's events... A rant.
Today, I helped my mom clean her hair. About a week ago, she had a craniotomy, where they removed a tumor about the size of a marble. This week, she was finally allowed to wash her hair. However, my mother has very frizzy, curly hair that does not brush or detangle easily, so you can imagine that after about 2 hours of…
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So Angry.....and so Sad
My husband was daignosed with Omentun Cnacer on April 11, 2016. Everything now sucks. I have so MUCH anger over my husabnd's cancer that sometimes it disables me. But I try no to show it. His is a cancer that there is NO cure for, so only time will tell. But all I can think about is how angry I am that we have lost our…
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PTSD