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I have to post this for my daughter's birthday....I said I would in chat
21 years ago today you came into my life...I was so amazed to how beautiful you were, and still are....I was in awe of your intelligence and still am to this day! I promised that I would never let anyone hurt you, I tried as your mother....You are the best thing that has ever happened to me, I would never let anyone take…
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shes been gone for a week today
she has been gone a week today. i can hear the sound of her voice. i can see her every time i close my eyes. my perfect little angel is really gone. i dnt have a gma anymore. i cant believe an entire week has gone by.im getting good at pretending im ok i still cry in the bathroom at work sometimes when i rememeber her. but…
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is it wrong to feel sorry for myself ?
Is it wrong to feel sorry for myself ? Is wrong to wonder why people never ask how I am doing? I AM SO MAD is it wrong? I am not sure how to make it through this journey with out guilt, I am mad that he is giving up!!! I feel like we are just waiting for him to die, he is so down I am not sure how to deal I just want to…
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I need to vent about this evil taking my Mark
I really need to vent today and I know that this board is unbiase and I honestly feel better typing on this when I do have to vent. This cancer is ruining me and my husband. We were suppose to be together and grow old together and this cancer is taking all that away from us. I HATE CANCER! My poor husband doesn't deserve…
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new at this...just wanting to share my feeling about my wonderfull wife
hello my name is jeff. my wife and i found out that she has breast cancer about a year ago after she retired from the airforce...she was in there for 24 years and after she retired she found a knott on her chest. So we then went to the hospital and they said it was nothen. so 6 weeks had past and she started to have pain…
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So Much to Say
but there aren't words to describe the kind of heartache felt when watching the love of your life being taken from you. The only time my heart isn't aching is when my mind is overwhelmed with guilt. Life is loosing a lot of good by what's happening to this woman and I will never, ever forgive Life for bringing this kind of…
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No more Chemo
My finacee has decided that he will not have any more chemo, even if it might be his best chance. He had a terrible and very long first round of chemo and it was so hard on him and I know he felt more terrible than I could ever know, especially because the cancer clinic would not prescribe any nausea or pain meds because…
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Just a needed vent here...
Guess I'm really feeling sorry for myself, so I need to say it out loud so I can build a bridge and get over it. Dx 12/30/10, on June 23 was husband's surgery, colon resection, rectum removal. He is in the throws of second round of chemo and will be till December. For Labor Day weekend we had planned a short 1hr trip to…
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grandma passed today
we lost the battle today grandma took her last breath today at 4:05 pm as i recited psalms 91 to her. the cancer won again. i feel numb. idk how to go back to life. i knew it was coming and i thought i was ready guess i thought wrong. lani
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Everyday is a blessing with my husband Mark
As I sit here and type my husband is in bed sleeping again. Every morning is a blessing he gets out of bed and talks to me for the short time before he goes back to bed. The pain has increased and has kept him in bed for most of the day these past few days. As I put him to bed tonight I told him to never forget that I love…
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Mum of young family, feeling angry and hopeless and ripped off with husband's cancer
Feeling completely washed-up, hopeless and angry after dealing with cancer diagnosis for 4 years. My husband's cancer was first diagnosed when I was 7 weeks pregnant with our 1st baby, and (with a brief interlude of believing it was gone), the terminal cancer diagnosis was given when I was 9 weeks pregnant with our second.…
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she's not eating...
hi everyone. i am living with and taking care of my mother who was diagnosed with endometrial cancer. (i'm afraid i'm not a very good speller) we have been battling this for oh, probably a year if not longer. she started with radiation with a 4% chance of coming back. the thing is that yes it did come back in a way that…
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please ANYONE.......
I have posted this in several boards on here and figured I would put it here as well.. My husband has been having a lot of pain in his hip and finally had an MRI that shows "there is an enhancing macrolobulated low T1 high T2 heterogeneous signal soft tissue mass which reveals post contrast enhancement juxtaposed between…
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having more kids .. uknown... :(
My daughter just asked me if I had a baby in my tummy? I wish so badly I could say yes honey! I hate that an innocent question from my 5 year old would not get me so down. I wish I could see into the future and know that indeed we will be able to get past this hurdle and be able to live long happy lives and be able to have…
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New to the Board
I am Becky I am my Mom's only cargiver. She has lung cancer and we are nearing the ned of a long battle that started in June of 2010. We did chemo and radiation last fall and more chemo this spring. THe spring chemo made her so ill she stopped. She has moved in with my husband and I a month ago. She is still mobile but…
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Hi all,
Although I've been posting on the esophageal site here for months, I have not ventured into the caregiver site until today. I guess I've just been so busy trying to 'fix' my husband, that I've forgotten about myself. But, alas, here I am. Let me introduce myself. My name is Chantal and my husband is Lee. He was diagnosed…
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No More they can do
The dreaded words were told to us today, after an 8 year battle with colon cancer the Dr. says it is our decision to continue treatment because he is out of options. Those have to be the hardest words I have ever heard in my life, to know that the one you love more than anything in the world is out of options, wow. How on…
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He is dying now
My Ric has maybe another day in this world. I am so broken inside. I'm trying to remember the good times, but he blames me for "poisoning him" and "Killing him". Hospice says it's the tumors in his brain talking to me, but I can't completely believe them. I got him to do Chemo, so by that respect, I DID poison him. In…
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Feeling like an ****
I totally blew up at my fiancee this morning, and I can't for the life of me remeber what stupid petty thing it was that I was soooo pissed of about. I love my fiancee and am so grateful to have him in my life. I hate the cancer, I hate it I hate it. I hate looking for treatment options I hate applying for assistance and…
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Feeling like I'm a burden
Feeling like I'm a burden to my amazing boyfriend, who is my caregiver during this awful cancer battle. I can tell when he's stressed and sad, and when this is all is bringing him down, and it makes me feel so guilty. I feel like every day of his life is spent thinking about me and doing everything that is necessary, and…
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Hats for mum
I don't know where to place this so I thought I would start here. I am trying to find hats for my mother who lost her hair to chemo. I'm not made of money so I was trying to look for places that would give her hats. Hats off to chemo gave her two very nice hats which I am grateful. I was recommended to try heavenly hats…
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just a thought
i have been where we all are time and time again my mother my uncle my mother in law and my daughter. have all been under my care at one time or another all for cancer. untill my daughter was dx with hodgkins i thought i was there to give end of life support. and because of my faith i figured i was the one chosen to do ths…
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My Turn
Not my turn to have cancer, but my turn to be the one that everyone is worried about. I'm throwing in the towel and going to see my doctor today about a bucket of symptoms I'm now starting to think are all part of menopause. Hot flashes, I could live with (don't get those anyway) - ditto the hairy chin, the weight gain,…
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Latest CT / MRI stable, testing for BRAF
SO we went for dad's CT on Monday last week, and got the report that afternoon. Dr said only a couple tumors (spleen and by colon) had minimally grown, but not the more worrisome ones in the lungs. He has finished 4 rounds on Temodar (3 weeks on/ 1 off) since May. Dr ordered test for BRAF gene variation in his melanoma,…
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In Home Nursing Care
Hi All, New to the board, just joined this AM. My wife had a right Lobectomy in March after finding a Stage 1B tumor and was declared cancer free after surgery. The cancer returned with a vengeance in late August and she starts radiation and chemo this week. I guess all that's left now is to make her life more comfortable…
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hospice care (i think thas how u spell it )
doctor said that all that is medically possible has been done. grandma is going into hospice care. the nurse from hospice told me that she is at high risk of a heart attack at whcih point she will be given morphine so that she doesnt feel any pain. doctor told me these world "the chemo didnt work. the cancer grew and…
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grandma
omg i cant believe that i just realized that there is a caregivers forum! my name is lani im 21 years old i work full time and im in my senior year of college. I have always thought of myself as a good person yet i feel like im being punished. When i was 19 years old i witnessed my aunt pass from lymphoma. I was her…
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neuroendrocrine cancer
This cancer is rare. It has effected my family very much. I lost my father to this cancer and i have learned that this type of cancer is very herditery. which means i will also get this cancer. I have been in the medical field for over twenty years and had made many friends in the medical field. I did extensive research…
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I'm a caregiver, my fiancee is a survivor, and a patient and his prognosis is good. We are in Watch
I'm having a hard time right now. My fiancee is a 10 year testicular cancer survivor, and is in remission from lung cancer (ok not really remission, but he has no heath insurance and the indigent care at the hospital says watch and wait until it becomes life threatening again and then we'll look at more treatment.) We…
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activities
Hi all - my mom has late stage primary liver cancer. There's not a whole lot she's able to do...she has problems with her eyes and can't focus to read. She sleeps most of the time, and when she's awake is incredibly fatigued so moving around isn't an option. She has tremors and such so anything requiring fine motor skills…