breast removal last week

survivorbc09

momof_5_withbreastcancer said:

Today was a good day. Met
Today was a good day. Met with my plastic surgeon for my post op and then had a nice lunch with my mom. I came home and took a nap while my mom took all the kids to the lake. Boyfriend came home and we had some time to talk which was long over due. I share this website with him and the things all of u have said to me. He told me that at his lunch for the last couple weeks he has spent his time researching breast cancer and what we go threw when we loose our breasts. I was surprised. He told me some of his fears and I see now that he has been scared also but just hasn't know how to show me. He thought he had to be strong for me. After our talk we took 2 of our kids to there baseball games and then grabbed the rest of them at home and went out for dinner. We went to the gym to swim for a little while......I just watched......and then home so they could get to bed. After finishing a nice relaxing bath in quiet my boyfriend came in and washed my hair. It was very nice to have him help me like that. This is the earliest I have gotten in bed in weeks and the first day in months that I have not cried. I think I will go to sleep now. Thank u for sharing your stories and showing me I'm not alone.

Lunch with your Mom and a
Lunch with your Mom and a nap is just what you need more often! And, it sounds like your boyfriend is really trying.

You are not alone, you've got us now!


Hugs, Jan

Jobi

momof_5_withbreastcancer said:

today was ok
I'm laying in bed with ice backs on both breasts. This is the only thing I have found that will take the swelling down. People say I put to much on my plate. Lol. I have 5 kids, I own my own business, I do all the house work and cooking, run my kids to sport activities 5 days a week, pay all the bills alone, battle cancer, have both breasts removed 2 weeks ago and then today I decided to have a garage sale with the hell from my mom. Yes, I think I am going crazy. But with everything I did today I checked back on this site to read all the supportive words and it helped. I am a bit cranky and the boyfriend isn't talking to me because of it but that's ok. Sometimes it nice to not have to hear someone talk. So I am going to lay here for another 10 minutes and freeze my butt off and then fall asleep. I can't wait till I can sleep on my tummy again.


O, wish me luck for tomorrow. I find out if my doctor thinks I need to follow up with more chemo. I am hoping not but I hear that most everyone does after a breast removal.

Good days and bad days will
Good days and bad days will happen. Sometimes, you may just need to turn off the phones when you can and just rest.

Continued prayers for you!

Dorene

Rague

I have read your OP several
I have read your OP several times and had not replied because I'm a lot older (31 yrs to be exact).

From what I read - perhaps a councelor would be a good idea - especially one who has dealt with PTSD. PTSD is very real and unfortunately is often overlooked. ANY TRAUMATIC happening can trigger it. My Hubby is PTSD - not from his 20 yrs Navy but from when he was 9 and lost his Mom to cervical cancer. He had a 'flare up' when I was DX'd IBC 3 yrs ago. I certain can not say you are PTSD but it is a possibility and there is help for you AND your kids. There are many other possibilities but there is also help for all. Please reach out for professional help - it is available.

I don't understand why you can't exercise. I was given a print out of exercises to do when I saw surgeon a week after surgery. Walking was very encouraged.

Prayers

Winyan - The Power Within

Susan

momof_5_withbreastcancer

Rague said:

I have read your OP several
I have read your OP several times and had not replied because I'm a lot older (31 yrs to be exact).

From what I read - perhaps a councelor would be a good idea - especially one who has dealt with PTSD. PTSD is very real and unfortunately is often overlooked. ANY TRAUMATIC happening can trigger it. My Hubby is PTSD - not from his 20 yrs Navy but from when he was 9 and lost his Mom to cervical cancer. He had a 'flare up' when I was DX'd IBC 3 yrs ago. I certain can not say you are PTSD but it is a possibility and there is help for you AND your kids. There are many other possibilities but there is also help for all. Please reach out for professional help - it is available.

I don't understand why you can't exercise. I was given a print out of exercises to do when I saw surgeon a week after surgery. Walking was very encouraged.

Prayers

Winyan - The Power Within

Susan

susan
I do see a councelor weekly. I am on xanax for anxiety and to help me sleep. It is starting to help but I have so much on my plate that I get over whelmed almost daily. I am trying to learn how to take care of me first. As for the working out, my doctor knows how I workout and he is concerned I will try to jump back into the gym to fast. I was told I can walk around my neighborhood but that it. 2 years ago I weighted 250 lbs. I starting eating healthy and going go the gym for 4 hours a day while my kids where in school. I took every class I could and weight trained and swam. When I was told I had cancer I was down to 150 which is 10 lbs heavier then my ideal weight. He is afraid that I will fall back into the same routine to fast and won't allow myself time to recover. Walking is all he wants me to do. I told him I wanted to run the 3 day cancer walk in august and he said no way, but told me I could walk it if I was up for it. My body keeps telling me its tired but my mind says different. O he also told me I can only lift 5 lbs. I laughed cause I used to be able to bench 160 before I got sick.

Thank u for your concern. I am learning I have to take baby steps with all this right now. I have bad days and good and some times I have horrible days but I am trying to be positive with things. I slip sometimes and get depressed. Every day can't be perfect and I know that.

eihtak

momof_5_withbreastcancer said:

susan
I do see a councelor weekly. I am on xanax for anxiety and to help me sleep. It is starting to help but I have so much on my plate that I get over whelmed almost daily. I am trying to learn how to take care of me first. As for the working out, my doctor knows how I workout and he is concerned I will try to jump back into the gym to fast. I was told I can walk around my neighborhood but that it. 2 years ago I weighted 250 lbs. I starting eating healthy and going go the gym for 4 hours a day while my kids where in school. I took every class I could and weight trained and swam. When I was told I had cancer I was down to 150 which is 10 lbs heavier then my ideal weight. He is afraid that I will fall back into the same routine to fast and won't allow myself time to recover. Walking is all he wants me to do. I told him I wanted to run the 3 day cancer walk in august and he said no way, but told me I could walk it if I was up for it. My body keeps telling me its tired but my mind says different. O he also told me I can only lift 5 lbs. I laughed cause I used to be able to bench 160 before I got sick.

Thank u for your concern. I am learning I have to take baby steps with all this right now. I have bad days and good and some times I have horrible days but I am trying to be positive with things. I slip sometimes and get depressed. Every day can't be perfect and I know that.

Hi
Just saying hi and hoping for more good days. I also used to overfill my plate so to speak, wasn't really happy unless I had more than I could handle some times????? Some of us are just wired that way! Even now, though I have learned to not over load my day, I sometimes go stir crazy if I don't have enough to do and have a hard time saying no. Good luck as you get through this but do remember to take a little bit of time each day to power nap for yourself or you'll be no good for anything else! Keep in touch.

LoveBabyJesus

We got your back!
Hi pink sister (and welcome!).

So sorry you're dealing with all of this nightmare that no one deserves. But please know you are not alone.

I'm 34 diagnosed at 32 last year. I did lumpectomy, chemo, radiation and now on tamoxifen for 5 years (with no kids or married). So I understand your frustrations and fear, but it will get better. I know now seems impossible to see it. I too felt like this would never end. But it does. And you get your life back. And you will see things differently.

Here's a nice link someone else shared: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/jeff-tomczek/cancer-advice_b_1628266.html?utm_hp_ref=fb&src=sp&comm_ref=false. It's a good representation of the emotions and experiences we all go through. We are all in this fight together. And it does come to an end.

The people who love you will always be there. It is hard for others to deal with a situation like this. It's not easy. They are scared. Please have patience with them and with yourself too. Allow yourself to be angry, to cry, to laugh, etc...These emotions are all normal and only going through them will things get better.

If you want to chat send me a pm. Remember there's light at the end of the tunnel.

Sending you positive thoughts and prayers.

Hang in there! You'll get through this.

XOXO

deerello

momof_5_withbreastcancer said:

susan
I do see a councelor weekly. I am on xanax for anxiety and to help me sleep. It is starting to help but I have so much on my plate that I get over whelmed almost daily. I am trying to learn how to take care of me first. As for the working out, my doctor knows how I workout and he is concerned I will try to jump back into the gym to fast. I was told I can walk around my neighborhood but that it. 2 years ago I weighted 250 lbs. I starting eating healthy and going go the gym for 4 hours a day while my kids where in school. I took every class I could and weight trained and swam. When I was told I had cancer I was down to 150 which is 10 lbs heavier then my ideal weight. He is afraid that I will fall back into the same routine to fast and won't allow myself time to recover. Walking is all he wants me to do. I told him I wanted to run the 3 day cancer walk in august and he said no way, but told me I could walk it if I was up for it. My body keeps telling me its tired but my mind says different. O he also told me I can only lift 5 lbs. I laughed cause I used to be able to bench 160 before I got sick.

Thank u for your concern. I am learning I have to take baby steps with all this right now. I have bad days and good and some times I have horrible days but I am trying to be positive with things. I slip sometimes and get depressed. Every day can't be perfect and I know that.

Good days/Bad days
We all have those. And even before cancer, life was no bed of roses. One of my resolutions this year was to get back into the shape resembling what I was, but a cancer diagnosis has postponed a lot of what I wanted to do. Just take it easy, you will have the rest of your life! I get so frustrated not being able to even do physical things like mow the lawn, but it is teaching my sons a lot more responsibilty, which is a good thing! I too was starting to walk a lot, but yesterday I fell down my back steps carrying laundry out to hang up (I was wearing flip flops) and hurt my foot. I can barely walk and am wondering if I should go to ER. So anyway, it is what it is. There will always be something, just roll with it; it will pass. You sound so much better than your first posting! Take care.

survivorbc09

momof_5_withbreastcancer said:

Today was a good day. Met
Today was a good day. Met with my plastic surgeon for my post op and then had a nice lunch with my mom. I came home and took a nap while my mom took all the kids to the lake. Boyfriend came home and we had some time to talk which was long over due. I share this website with him and the things all of u have said to me. He told me that at his lunch for the last couple weeks he has spent his time researching breast cancer and what we go threw when we loose our breasts. I was surprised. He told me some of his fears and I see now that he has been scared also but just hasn't know how to show me. He thought he had to be strong for me. After our talk we took 2 of our kids to there baseball games and then grabbed the rest of them at home and went out for dinner. We went to the gym to swim for a little while......I just watched......and then home so they could get to bed. After finishing a nice relaxing bath in quiet my boyfriend came in and washed my hair. It was very nice to have him help me like that. This is the earliest I have gotten in bed in weeks and the first day in months that I have not cried. I think I will go to sleep now. Thank u for sharing your stories and showing me I'm not alone.

Wishing you good luck with
Wishing you good luck with your surgery!


Hugs, Jan

laughs_a_lot

kids can do a lot for themselves if you let them (considerations for age of course). Summer is a good time for them to pracitice new skills. If you belong to a church see if they can help with some of the overwheming aspects of life. See if auntie or grandma can get kids to their games. You are a human being, not a human doing. You will get back to your old self before you know it.

DebbyM

deerello said:

Good days/Bad days
We all have those. And even before cancer, life was no bed of roses. One of my resolutions this year was to get back into the shape resembling what I was, but a cancer diagnosis has postponed a lot of what I wanted to do. Just take it easy, you will have the rest of your life! I get so frustrated not being able to even do physical things like mow the lawn, but it is teaching my sons a lot more responsibilty, which is a good thing! I too was starting to walk a lot, but yesterday I fell down my back steps carrying laundry out to hang up (I was wearing flip flops) and hurt my foot. I can barely walk and am wondering if I should go to ER. So anyway, it is what it is. There will always be something, just roll with it; it will pass. You sound so much better than your first posting! Take care.

Just sending you a big hug
Just sending you a big hug today! Hoping that your days and nights are much better for you! Post anytime as we are here for you!


Hugs, Debby

disneyfan2008

Vent away....I have not
Vent away....I have not experiecned all you have...but sending my thoughts and pixie dust to you and your family...

Denise

momof_5_withbreastcancer

disneyfan2008 said:

Vent away....I have not
Vent away....I have not experiecned all you have...but sending my thoughts and pixie dust to you and your family...

Denise

I'm not able to sleep
I'm not able to sleep tonight. I woke up Sunday morning and both breasts had so much pain. I went go the ER and found out I still have this damn staph infection. More antibotics. I'm sick of popping pills. Cancer meds, pain meds, hormone blockers antibotics, what's next. I just want to feel normal and do normal things. O ya and sleep.....without having to be on my back would be nice. I'm just tired and wish everyone would understand and stop asking me to be a super hero around my house.

Alexis F

momof_5_withbreastcancer said:

I'm not able to sleep
I'm not able to sleep tonight. I woke up Sunday morning and both breasts had so much pain. I went go the ER and found out I still have this damn staph infection. More antibotics. I'm sick of popping pills. Cancer meds, pain meds, hormone blockers antibotics, what's next. I just want to feel normal and do normal things. O ya and sleep.....without having to be on my back would be nice. I'm just tired and wish everyone would understand and stop asking me to be a super hero around my house.

So sorry about the staph
So sorry about the staph infection. I hope the antibiotics kick in and get rid of the infection quickly.

Hoping you can get some sleep soon. Please take it easy and know that I am praying for you.


Hugs, Lex

susie09

Rague said:

I have read your OP several
I have read your OP several times and had not replied because I'm a lot older (31 yrs to be exact).

From what I read - perhaps a councelor would be a good idea - especially one who has dealt with PTSD. PTSD is very real and unfortunately is often overlooked. ANY TRAUMATIC happening can trigger it. My Hubby is PTSD - not from his 20 yrs Navy but from when he was 9 and lost his Mom to cervical cancer. He had a 'flare up' when I was DX'd IBC 3 yrs ago. I certain can not say you are PTSD but it is a possibility and there is help for you AND your kids. There are many other possibilities but there is also help for all. Please reach out for professional help - it is available.

I don't understand why you can't exercise. I was given a print out of exercises to do when I saw surgeon a week after surgery. Walking was very encouraged.

Prayers

Winyan - The Power Within

Susan

By my having a lumpectomy, I
By my having a lumpectomy, I can't begin to know what you are going through. You just keep posting and if you need to vent, you do that too.

We're here to support and help all that we can.

survivorbc09

NancyJac said:

I just want to echo
I just want to echo everything that Rebecca said. You need and can get help for accepting and even celebrating your current situation. Until you are able to accept that your life is not going to go back to the way it was before, you won't be able to move forward from this rut you are currently in.

Sending gentle hugs!
Jan

Sending gentle hugs!


Jan

jnl

Alexis F said:

So sorry about the staph
So sorry about the staph infection. I hope the antibiotics kick in and get rid of the infection quickly.

Hoping you can get some sleep soon. Please take it easy and know that I am praying for you.


Hugs, Lex

I hope your infection clears
I hope your infection clears up soon. Post an update to let us know how you are doing.


Lots of prayers and hugs,


Leeza

LoveBabyJesus

momof_5_withbreastcancer said:

I'm not able to sleep
I'm not able to sleep tonight. I woke up Sunday morning and both breasts had so much pain. I went go the ER and found out I still have this damn staph infection. More antibotics. I'm sick of popping pills. Cancer meds, pain meds, hormone blockers antibotics, what's next. I just want to feel normal and do normal things. O ya and sleep.....without having to be on my back would be nice. I'm just tired and wish everyone would understand and stop asking me to be a super hero around my house.

Try this..
Try listening to this, it helps me to sleep. And when you hear the rain fall, think of only great things to come: http://www.rainymood.com/

momof_5_withbreastcancer

LoveBabyJesus said:

Try this..
Try listening to this, it helps me to sleep. And when you hear the rain fall, think of only great things to come: http://www.rainymood.com/

When will he think I'm
When will he think I'm beautiful again. Not only have I fought cancer and lost both breasts at 35 but now I feel like I'm losing my relationship. I'm lonely and he won't hug me or kiss me. I'm a very affectionate person and him not wanting to be close to me is making the recovery harder. I'm lost.

jnl

momof_5_withbreastcancer said:

When will he think I'm
When will he think I'm beautiful again. Not only have I fought cancer and lost both breasts at 35 but now I feel like I'm losing my relationship. I'm lonely and he won't hug me or kiss me. I'm a very affectionate person and him not wanting to be close to me is making the recovery harder. I'm lost.

I am so sorry that this is
I am so sorry that this is happening in your relationship. But you remember this, You Are Beautiful!!!! Our beauty isn't our breasts, it is what's inside us that is really important.

I think, in my opinion only, that you two really need to have a sit down with no interferences so that you can really delve into this. He needs to tell you how he is feeling and why. And maybe even both of you go for some counseling together. Sometimes a 3rd disinterested party can help. But, don't just give up and don't just be quiet and let this go on.

Keep talking to us and I hope we can help.


Hugs, Leeza

momof_5_withbreastcancer

jnl said:

I am so sorry that this is
I am so sorry that this is happening in your relationship. But you remember this, You Are Beautiful!!!! Our beauty isn't our breasts, it is what's inside us that is really important.

I think, in my opinion only, that you two really need to have a sit down with no interferences so that you can really delve into this. He needs to tell you how he is feeling and why. And maybe even both of you go for some counseling together. Sometimes a 3rd disinterested party can help. But, don't just give up and don't just be quiet and let this go on.

Keep talking to us and I hope we can help.


Hugs, Leeza

I have tried talking to him
I have tried talking to him and I suggested he go with me to counciling and he said no way. He sends me a text every morning from work that says good morning sexy but he will never say it or show it to me. He keeps his distance. It hurts. The one person I need to be able to lean on isn't there for me. I just don't know what to do. It's like a person that's on a diet, if u keep the sugar foods out of the house then they won't want them. So some times I feel like if I break things off then he won't be around for me to want attention from him. I'm sure that sounds weird. I have no family here in Minnesota and I don't have friends cause I am always with my kids. I'm sure someone is going to tell me to find a support group or get out and meet people. I can't sit in a room and tell everyone what I'm going threw. On here u guys don't know me and we will never meet. I live in a small town and I don't want my business all over it. I don't want the 20 questions from everyone. I'm private and I like it that way. I don't want my kids being treated differently from there friends and teachers because I have cancer.