my sister has breast cancer that has metastized to brain and lungs

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  • trabrat
    trabrat Member Posts: 10
    #22
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    puglover said:

    I have never posted on this
    I have never posted on this board but have been drawn by your post. I am so sorry to hear about your sister's new progression. I am praying for you both.
    I'm not trying to overstep my boundaries here but I am just a bit confused/conserned as to why she has ended treatment. She had treatment last year with progression. She has been currently on xeloda with more progression. There are many, many more drugs/treatments available. I was recently dx. mets extensively to my liver and 3 spots on my brain (also some in colon, abdominal wall, supraclav. lymph nodes). I had radiation to the brain 2 weeks ago and last week started a new chemo combo. Have you had a second opinion?
    God will provide you with the comfort and peace you are searching for.
    xoxo,
    Anne

    This problem all started
    This problem all started when she first started chemo for the breast cancer. She was getting taxoter, did good, made it shrink.. went through 4 rounds of that, started on A/C was like miracle grow, made it grow 25% within 2 treatments. that was stopped then went on carboplatinum with no results continued to grow, so surgery was done... couldnt start radiation for 6 months b/c of wound didnt heal and had to go to wound care specialist. Rad iation started and by then the drs feel it had already spread b/c of 13 positive lymph nodes. so when she started having headaches it was already in brain and lung. these tumors range from very small to 3 cm. Had radiation on brain and did take xeloda for 7 weeks and with this it spread to other lung and liver. I talked to 3 different drs and of course drs arent honest when it comes to cancer. They werent even with me.I told him I know people also dont die from cancer they die from starvation and that why we as care givers keep trying to feed our love ones. He told me I know alot about it. I told her dr look I know the final result of cancer and i want to know your honest answer to this. He said we arent god so we cant give you a date but I will tell you 6 months if you continue treatment and 2-4 without treatment so she said to me Tracy if the best they cane give me is 6 months I dont want to prolong it.We knew b/c it had metasized that it wasnt curable only treatable. This triple negative is a nasty form of cancer. Yes we have had many opinions. I am a nurse and do only want the best for her. I wish there was something they could do but its in gods hands now
  • CarrWilson
    CarrWilson Member Posts: 111
    #23
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    trabrat said:

    This problem all started
    This problem all started when she first started chemo for the breast cancer. She was getting taxoter, did good, made it shrink.. went through 4 rounds of that, started on A/C was like miracle grow, made it grow 25% within 2 treatments. that was stopped then went on carboplatinum with no results continued to grow, so surgery was done... couldnt start radiation for 6 months b/c of wound didnt heal and had to go to wound care specialist. Rad iation started and by then the drs feel it had already spread b/c of 13 positive lymph nodes. so when she started having headaches it was already in brain and lung. these tumors range from very small to 3 cm. Had radiation on brain and did take xeloda for 7 weeks and with this it spread to other lung and liver. I talked to 3 different drs and of course drs arent honest when it comes to cancer. They werent even with me.I told him I know people also dont die from cancer they die from starvation and that why we as care givers keep trying to feed our love ones. He told me I know alot about it. I told her dr look I know the final result of cancer and i want to know your honest answer to this. He said we arent god so we cant give you a date but I will tell you 6 months if you continue treatment and 2-4 without treatment so she said to me Tracy if the best they cane give me is 6 months I dont want to prolong it.We knew b/c it had metasized that it wasnt curable only treatable. This triple negative is a nasty form of cancer. Yes we have had many opinions. I am a nurse and do only want the best for her. I wish there was something they could do but its in gods hands now

    My heart goes out to you.
    My heart goes out to you. You are a strong person to deal with your sister's last wishes. It is difficult dealing with this beast, and when the prognosis is poor is even more tough. I hope the time with your sister will be comfortable, full of smiles, memories and laughs when you can. She is very lucky she has someone to be with her. There are no words to make this better, but know my thoughts are with you both.

    - Carrie
  • DebbyM
    DebbyM Member Posts: 3,289 Member
    #24
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    Lighthouse_7 said:

    Hi Trabrat,
    I am so very
    Hi Trabrat,
    I am so very sorry for both of you. I took care of my dad with the help of Hospice, he had lung cancer, so I know how very hard it is. Your sister is blessed to have you, I hope you know that. It takes a special person to do what you are doing.
    If you don't mind me asking, what does triple negative bc mean? I have Stage 3 with 8 nodes but I never heard that term.
    May God be with you both and I will include her in my prayers. Can I ask her first name.

    So sorry
    I am so sorry. You are such a wonderful sister to care for her. She is lucky in that way. Sending prayers to you both!
  • puglover
    puglover Member Posts: 2
    #25
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    Thank you so much for your
    Thank you so much for your reply. I didn't see the whole picture and wanted to make sure you had checked all your options... I can see it's been a very difficult battle and the decision your sister (and you) have made is a very courageous one. Praying God will comfort you both and keep her from pain. Eternal life is waiting for her in Heaven.
    Anne
  • survivorbc09
    survivorbc09 Member Posts: 4,374 Member
    #26
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    trabrat said:

    This problem all started
    This problem all started when she first started chemo for the breast cancer. She was getting taxoter, did good, made it shrink.. went through 4 rounds of that, started on A/C was like miracle grow, made it grow 25% within 2 treatments. that was stopped then went on carboplatinum with no results continued to grow, so surgery was done... couldnt start radiation for 6 months b/c of wound didnt heal and had to go to wound care specialist. Rad iation started and by then the drs feel it had already spread b/c of 13 positive lymph nodes. so when she started having headaches it was already in brain and lung. these tumors range from very small to 3 cm. Had radiation on brain and did take xeloda for 7 weeks and with this it spread to other lung and liver. I talked to 3 different drs and of course drs arent honest when it comes to cancer. They werent even with me.I told him I know people also dont die from cancer they die from starvation and that why we as care givers keep trying to feed our love ones. He told me I know alot about it. I told her dr look I know the final result of cancer and i want to know your honest answer to this. He said we arent god so we cant give you a date but I will tell you 6 months if you continue treatment and 2-4 without treatment so she said to me Tracy if the best they cane give me is 6 months I dont want to prolong it.We knew b/c it had metasized that it wasnt curable only treatable. This triple negative is a nasty form of cancer. Yes we have had many opinions. I am a nurse and do only want the best for her. I wish there was something they could do but its in gods hands now

    I am so sorry. It is always
    I am so sorry. It is always so very sad to read of these postings. Sending the both of you prayers and big hugs!
  • trabrat
    trabrat Member Posts: 10
    #27
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    puglover said:

    Thank you so much for your
    Thank you so much for your reply. I didn't see the whole picture and wanted to make sure you had checked all your options... I can see it's been a very difficult battle and the decision your sister (and you) have made is a very courageous one. Praying God will comfort you both and keep her from pain. Eternal life is waiting for her in Heaven.
    Anne

    I took my sister for a day
    I took my sister for a day of pampering.... We went and had an hour massage at massage envy.. It was so nice and they treated her good
  • Megan M
    Megan M Member Posts: 3,000
    #28
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    trabrat said:

    I took my sister for a day
    I took my sister for a day of pampering.... We went and had an hour massage at massage envy.. It was so nice and they treated her good

    You are such a good sister!
    You are such a good sister! Sending prayers to you both! Keep us updated on how both of you are doing.

    Hugs, Megan
  • mimivac
    mimivac Member Posts: 2,143 Member
    #29
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    trabrat said:

    This problem all started
    This problem all started when she first started chemo for the breast cancer. She was getting taxoter, did good, made it shrink.. went through 4 rounds of that, started on A/C was like miracle grow, made it grow 25% within 2 treatments. that was stopped then went on carboplatinum with no results continued to grow, so surgery was done... couldnt start radiation for 6 months b/c of wound didnt heal and had to go to wound care specialist. Rad iation started and by then the drs feel it had already spread b/c of 13 positive lymph nodes. so when she started having headaches it was already in brain and lung. these tumors range from very small to 3 cm. Had radiation on brain and did take xeloda for 7 weeks and with this it spread to other lung and liver. I talked to 3 different drs and of course drs arent honest when it comes to cancer. They werent even with me.I told him I know people also dont die from cancer they die from starvation and that why we as care givers keep trying to feed our love ones. He told me I know alot about it. I told her dr look I know the final result of cancer and i want to know your honest answer to this. He said we arent god so we cant give you a date but I will tell you 6 months if you continue treatment and 2-4 without treatment so she said to me Tracy if the best they cane give me is 6 months I dont want to prolong it.We knew b/c it had metasized that it wasnt curable only treatable. This triple negative is a nasty form of cancer. Yes we have had many opinions. I am a nurse and do only want the best for her. I wish there was something they could do but its in gods hands now

    I am sorry for your suffering
    Yes, triple negative can be very challenging to treat. Your sister's story strikes a cord with me as I am also triple negative and know many other women who are as well. Your sister has made a couragous decision that she thinks is best and we can only respect that. However, I just want you to know that I personally know of several women with triple negative with brain mets who have tried different treatments and have found something effective (one woman I just communicated with today is going on a year of survival since brain mets. And her quality of life is good). PARP inhibitors show promise for Stage IV tn women. Just some thoughts. This is such a hard journey for both of you.

    Mimi
  • Kylez
    Kylez Member Posts: 3,761 Member
    #30
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    puglover said:

    I have never posted on this
    I have never posted on this board but have been drawn by your post. I am so sorry to hear about your sister's new progression. I am praying for you both.
    I'm not trying to overstep my boundaries here but I am just a bit confused/conserned as to why she has ended treatment. She had treatment last year with progression. She has been currently on xeloda with more progression. There are many, many more drugs/treatments available. I was recently dx. mets extensively to my liver and 3 spots on my brain (also some in colon, abdominal wall, supraclav. lymph nodes). I had radiation to the brain 2 weeks ago and last week started a new chemo combo. Have you had a second opinion?
    God will provide you with the comfort and peace you are searching for.
    xoxo,
    Anne

    I am so sorry that this
    I am so sorry that this happened to your sister. Sending prayers and positive thoughts!
  • trabrat
    trabrat Member Posts: 10
    #31
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    Megan M said:

    You are such a good sister!
    You are such a good sister! Sending prayers to you both! Keep us updated on how both of you are doing.

    Hugs, Megan

    Hi everyone, just an
    Hi everyone, just an update... My sister was having a hard time with her husband so she wanted to leave that situation. I moved her to NC with me. She said all she wants is to die with dignity and peace so she and her son is home now with me and my family. I cant go into any detail about this b/c his family seems to lurk where ever we are including her facebook and her email.
    Anyway hospice is now coming to see her. They finally found a pain med to keep her comfy without zombing her out. We had 2 other sisters come in from Ohio and spending a few days. Her daughter is coming soon from south FL. These people would not of come if we were still in FL so its been nice.
    The pastor of the church has been coming to see her and she has found all the peace she needs. I will keep you updated
    Thanks everyone for your kind words and prayers
  • MyTurnNow
    MyTurnNow Member Posts: 2,686 Member
    #32
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    trabrat said:

    Hi everyone, just an
    Hi everyone, just an update... My sister was having a hard time with her husband so she wanted to leave that situation. I moved her to NC with me. She said all she wants is to die with dignity and peace so she and her son is home now with me and my family. I cant go into any detail about this b/c his family seems to lurk where ever we are including her facebook and her email.
    Anyway hospice is now coming to see her. They finally found a pain med to keep her comfy without zombing her out. We had 2 other sisters come in from Ohio and spending a few days. Her daughter is coming soon from south FL. These people would not of come if we were still in FL so its been nice.
    The pastor of the church has been coming to see her and she has found all the peace she needs. I will keep you updated
    Thanks everyone for your kind words and prayers

    Sending you strength to help
    Sending you strength to help your sister through her final days. I'm so happy that she has you and is able to find the peace that she was searching for. I enlisted the help of hospice when my husband was dying from lung cancer. There are not enough good things to say about such a wonderful organization. They will not only help your sister through the process but will also benefit the family's journey, too. Good luck to you and sending (((hugs))) your way. Take care and continue to update us, as you are able.
  • DebbyM
    DebbyM Member Posts: 3,289 Member
    #33
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    MyTurnNow said:

    Sending you strength to help
    Sending you strength to help your sister through her final days. I'm so happy that she has you and is able to find the peace that she was searching for. I enlisted the help of hospice when my husband was dying from lung cancer. There are not enough good things to say about such a wonderful organization. They will not only help your sister through the process but will also benefit the family's journey, too. Good luck to you and sending (((hugs))) your way. Take care and continue to update us, as you are able.

    Thanks for the update.
    Thanks for the update. Continuing to send prayers for your sister!

    Hugs, Debby
  • reeseslover1234
    reeseslover1234 Member Posts: 87
    #34
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    PRAYER!!!
    Hello trabrat,

    Please know that my prayers are with you and your sister. I just joined CSN today, so I pray that this doesn't find its way to you too late. Cancer knows no prejudice. It doesn't care who or what you are. My diagnosis was last Aug. and my experience was not the best, but it was also not the worst. There were times when I felt like all I had were prayers. God knows and He cares.
  • trabrat
    trabrat Member Posts: 10
    #35
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    reeseslover1234 said:

    PRAYER!!!
    Hello trabrat,

    Please know that my prayers are with you and your sister. I just joined CSN today, so I pray that this doesn't find its way to you too late. Cancer knows no prejudice. It doesn't care who or what you are. My diagnosis was last Aug. and my experience was not the best, but it was also not the worst. There were times when I felt like all I had were prayers. God knows and He cares.

    Hospice nurse was here
    Hospice nurse was here yesterday, I asked her how long she thought she may have and she said 3-4 weeks. How am I going to let her go???
    She came into the kitchen today and I just lost it crying, we hugged and I told her I am going to miss her so much but I told her I would be ok and that I love her so much.

    I pray for comfort for her. I am so sad. As I was holding her I told her that the lymph nodes in her neck are so big she said I know. Dear god she has suffered enough.
    She said Tracy I will always be with you.
  • prv
    prv Member Posts: 107
    #36
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    trabrat said:

    Hospice nurse was here
    Hospice nurse was here yesterday, I asked her how long she thought she may have and she said 3-4 weeks. How am I going to let her go???
    She came into the kitchen today and I just lost it crying, we hugged and I told her I am going to miss her so much but I told her I would be ok and that I love her so much.

    I pray for comfort for her. I am so sad. As I was holding her I told her that the lymph nodes in her neck are so big she said I know. Dear god she has suffered enough.
    She said Tracy I will always be with you.

    prayers
    prayers to you, your sister and family.
    hugs
    prv
  • Balentine
    Balentine Member Posts: 393
    #37
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    trabrat said:

    Hospice nurse was here
    Hospice nurse was here yesterday, I asked her how long she thought she may have and she said 3-4 weeks. How am I going to let her go???
    She came into the kitchen today and I just lost it crying, we hugged and I told her I am going to miss her so much but I told her I would be ok and that I love her so much.

    I pray for comfort for her. I am so sad. As I was holding her I told her that the lymph nodes in her neck are so big she said I know. Dear god she has suffered enough.
    She said Tracy I will always be with you.

    I pray for God to give you and your sister peace
    Dear Tracy,
    I am so sorry to hear about your sister. We don't understand why God allows these things. We just trust Him to get us through it somehow. I know how hard this must be for you but right now enjoy this time with your sister. Sit down together and do some reminicing of the times you and her shared growing up and growing old side by side. Don't dwell on the inevitable....dwell on the lives you two have shared and all the precious times you have had together and cherish those together right now. I pray that God comforts you both and give you His peace that passes all understanding and that He will keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus our Lord and Savior. Love and hugs to you both.

    Lorrie Balentine
  • 24242
    24242 Member Posts: 1,398
    #38
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    Amazing
    Wow is all I can say...
    Knowing from experience that Cancer doesn't resolve bad situations and your sister has incredible strength and courage to know what she wants and leave for it. Having an amazing sister like you must be an amazing comfort to her and thank God she left so that she could surround herself with LOVE. Love is an amazing thing and makes all the difference in her world.
    thank you all for restoring my faith in family.
    Tara
  • Mama G
    Mama G Member Posts: 762
    #39
    Options
    24242 said:

    Amazing
    Wow is all I can say...
    Knowing from experience that Cancer doesn't resolve bad situations and your sister has incredible strength and courage to know what she wants and leave for it. Having an amazing sister like you must be an amazing comfort to her and thank God she left so that she could surround herself with LOVE. Love is an amazing thing and makes all the difference in her world.
    thank you all for restoring my faith in family.
    Tara

    You are so blessed to have each other.
    I just went to Cali (from Fl) to be with my sister when she died in Dec. and it was the most difficult thing I've ever done. Especially knowing that I was just beginning MY own battle with this beast. She was so strong, just like your sister. Please just try to enjoy every minute God gives you together. Talk and laugh and cry and enjoy each other's company if that is all you have left, take it for all you can get. The memories will be there for you after she's gone, believe me. And you will have NO regrets. Of course continue to PRAY FOR A MIRACLE!!!! Where is the darn CURE for this disease? So very sad that we have to suffer so much with it. Please give her a big hug from all of us on this site and try to do something "fun" each day. Even if it's just a tv show together, a card game, look at old family pictures, or a walk or drive.
  • ms.sunshine
    ms.sunshine Member Posts: 707 Member
    #40
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    Mama G said:

    You are so blessed to have each other.
    I just went to Cali (from Fl) to be with my sister when she died in Dec. and it was the most difficult thing I've ever done. Especially knowing that I was just beginning MY own battle with this beast. She was so strong, just like your sister. Please just try to enjoy every minute God gives you together. Talk and laugh and cry and enjoy each other's company if that is all you have left, take it for all you can get. The memories will be there for you after she's gone, believe me. And you will have NO regrets. Of course continue to PRAY FOR A MIRACLE!!!! Where is the darn CURE for this disease? So very sad that we have to suffer so much with it. Please give her a big hug from all of us on this site and try to do something "fun" each day. Even if it's just a tv show together, a card game, look at old family pictures, or a walk or drive.

    Tracy you are giving the
    Tracy you are giving the greatest love one can give to another. Give Lisa a great big hug and a kiss from all of us. And yes she will always be with you.
  • jphilpo
    jphilpo Member Posts: 177
    #41
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    trabrat said:

    Hospice nurse was here
    Hospice nurse was here yesterday, I asked her how long she thought she may have and she said 3-4 weeks. How am I going to let her go???
    She came into the kitchen today and I just lost it crying, we hugged and I told her I am going to miss her so much but I told her I would be ok and that I love her so much.

    I pray for comfort for her. I am so sad. As I was holding her I told her that the lymph nodes in her neck are so big she said I know. Dear god she has suffered enough.
    She said Tracy I will always be with you.

    Tracy
    My thought and ptayers are with you both. What an AMAZING person you are!! Your sister has been blessed by having you in her life and I know you feel the same way about her. What an inspiration you are. God Bless!

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