I can't do the mammogram

Can you get an ultrasound
Can you get an ultrasound instead? Hugs, Lili

chenheart said:

OUCH
Tasha! You don't have to tell him you forgot to have it done, tell him what pain you are in! Perhaps they will/can schedule you an MRI or an Ultrasound...no ouchies involved, ya know? Regardless, tell him about the pain!!!! Call your dr NOW~ before you appointment with him, so he knows there will be no mammo film to look out. Perhaps he will have a suggestion.

Hugs,
Claudia

Tasha
Tasha...don't say you forgot the appointment. This is too important! Certainly tell you doctor of you are in pain..but it's very important you get this test or another substitute.
My elderly MIL used to say.."You can stand on your head for a week if you need to!!"
Maybe a dose of valium beforehand would help.

My first mammo was when they
My first mammo was when they found the cancer. With the tumor it hurt. Plus I was scared cuz I knew something was wrong. Anyway, I almost did faint. I had to be wheeled out in a chair. Very dramatic for my poor husband in the waiting room who sent in a healthy wife and gets back a BC dx and a wheelchair.
For my after TX, first year mammo. I did some visualization work. I read a book that says you may stay traumatically stuck in a situation unless you resolve it. So, when I took the mammo I envisioned myself releasing my power, victim no longer. I saw myself in my mind smashing the mammogram machine with a powerful karate kick. Kapow. Don't know if it helped, but is WAS kind of fun!
You know, if we stub our toe it can be D*&% painful. But we don't live in dread of it because we don't schedule it. You CAN get past this, just like we curse and jump up and down and indeed get passed that stupid stubbed toe. We are all there with you.
love, Joyce

Mammogram
Tasha, I am with the other ladies here. Don't tell the doctor you forgot; tell him the truth. No need to be ashamed that you are in pain and fearful of being in more pain. Telling the truth and knowing that you have nothing to feel guilty about will empower you in many ways. It will give the doctors a chance to help you and give you strength. There is a solution to everything if you let others help and tell them what you are going through. You are so strong already. Don't let this get you down.

Mimi

tasha_111 said:

Thank You
Thank you all for your comments, but I am just so stressed about this mammo business I have decided not to have another appointment with the onco, he's horrible anyway. I'll carry on getting regular check ups' with my dr and my surgeon, but I won't have to put up with Dr Charisma Bypass again....I have no intention of going through all this again anyway, so why put up with this miserable man and his tortuous tests. Thanks again, but I have made up my mind. Jxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

(((((HUGS)))))
Tasha,

If you dislike your onco so much perhaps you could see another one in your surrounding area. GP's and surgeons are good yes, but they do not have the expertise an oncologist has. It pains me to think you could have a recurrence and not get the help that you need because you dislike your current onco. These gals are right, brutal honesty is important right now, your doctor cannot possibly know how sore your are (especially since he has never had breasts and has no idea what getting them smashed is like) unless you tell him. MRI of the breast area is a painless option with even better results. I know you say you have made up your mind, however you are of great value to me and I felt compelled to add my two cents. There is only one Tasha, unique, witty and charming in your own way please please please do not give up on yourself because of a poor relationship with your onco.

Many many Hugs,

RE

mimivac said:

What RE said
Don't let that miserable man keep you from getting the care you need and deserve. You should have a good relationship with the person who is entrusted with your life. Definitely find someone new. It's your right. He should be the one unhappy that he has not met your needs. At least don't make up your mind yet, Julia. Just take some time to think about this.

Don't Make Your Decision Yet!
Julia, please don't make this decision because you dislike your oncologist..there are plenty more where he came from. However, only an oncologist really has the expertise to help you have a successful outcome. If the pain is what is holding you up..there are plenty of different tests and plenty of drugs to help you through.
Think about it and keep talking to us. We are here for you and will help in any way we can.

tasha_111 said:

OK
I rang them tonight to cancel my appointment, his nurse (who is nice) came on the line and said to please keep my appointment and I didn't have to have a mammogram.........just talk to him about it. She said maybe I could have ultrasound..which I can handle. Thanks again for all your imput. Jxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Happy
I am so glad you made this decision. The nurse sounds like a person who is doing her job right.

tasha_111 said:

OK
I rang them tonight to cancel my appointment, his nurse (who is nice) came on the line and said to please keep my appointment and I didn't have to have a mammogram.........just talk to him about it. She said maybe I could have ultrasound..which I can handle. Thanks again for all your imput. Jxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Thank you!
Thank you Tasha for not canceling, sounds like your onco has a good and caring nurse in his office! Please keep us posted you are in my heart and in my prayers!!!

RE

Marcia527 said:

You know I was going to
You know I was going to suggest an ultrasound instead! I really was!

I can relate
Tasha/Julia,
I can relate to your fear. I have no problems with mammos and I am not afraid of my follow up appointments even though I am still sore. But 9 years ago I had uterine cancer. I hated, no I was always deathly afraid of pelvic exams (had a bad accident when I was 3 or 4 and was traumatized and injured in that region) so I just never had them. Well, I had two, one when I was pregnant and one at delivery. The delivery one was so painful and freaked me out so bad that I decided I would never have another one. The doctor that delivered me was not my regular ob-gyn and actually said I'm surprised you got pregnant. My husband told him that a pelvic isn't sex and that he had no right to tell me that. I never had another pelvic until I had severe bleeding and clotting when I was 52. I went to that appointment and told the gynocologist that I just couldn't do the exam but I knew something was wrong. She did the exam and a d&C as an outpatient under sedation. When the cancer diagnosis came in I was referred to a gyn-onc group. When I walked in the room for my first visit he asked what was I most afraid of (found out later that he always asks this so his patients can know that his first concern is them and what is happening to them). I told him it was that he was going to want to do a pelvic exam. I knew that if he was going to do one I was leaving and I didn't care about the consequences. He reached over and took my hands and patted them and said that he usually heard fear of dying, what was the treatment going to be, everything to do with the cancer and that he had never heard pelvic fear being the worst fear. He also assured me that he would do all that while doing the hysterectomy and that we would go from there for future exams. He didn't make me feel stupid or unreasonable but treated this fear with respect. When I had to have my exam for the radiation I was freaking out but they gave me light sedation and I got through it and through the internal radiation as well. No one made me feel uncomfortable or embarassed by this fear. At my 1st follow up 3 months later, the nurse practioner in his department met with me and we decided to take it slow. She tried to gently do the exam but it didn't work. The next one was better and by the end of my 2nd year we were getting through them without much difficulty. I still dread them but I can do them and I never an appointment. So I know what you mean about the whole invasion of self and discomfort. But you did the right thing by talking with the nurse. You should go to this appointment and then take it from there. Like all the others said, there are ways around this. Alternate tests, MRI, ultrasounds, etc. And they can do a mammo while you are sitting in a chair. That's how I did the wire placements. Please do your follow ups the best you can and work with the doctors and nurses to get these done in a way that works for you. Don't let your doctor make you feel that you are being a baby. Sometimes our fears are not about the big things but the rest of the stuff. But there are solutions to nearly everything if you look for them. And in your heart you know that ignoring this is not the best solution. You have conquered so much, you can conquer this too. Trust me, as the biggest, scaredy cat baby in the whole world, you can do it.
Stef