Meloncholey

Katz77 said:

Feeling the same, kind of
I just saw my onc today, and left upbeat. Im 1 1/2 out from surgery, so still see him every 3 months. Was feeling scared, confused and sad. Seems alot are struggling with tests and the results. Waiting for phone calls, getting phone calls. Another friend of mine ( thats 3 now) is getting more tests tomorrow to see if she has cancer. So I was getting worried. Think our docs are our security blankets, and when they start letting us go its spooky. Felt like you after chemo and rads ended. Think it will get better. Katz

Have had those same feelings...
Eil - I can totally relate to your feelings, completely understand. Following completion of all invasive treatment, I saw one (of the 3) of my onc docs every 6 weeks, first year. Second year, every 8 weeks... Over time, appointments spread further apart. My surgeon was the first to drop out of the rotation. Was devastated - because I was the most "attached" to him, emotionally. About a year later, my rad onc was done. She was the sole woman on the team - missed her, too.

Now, I continue to see my med onc twice a year. He has told me I need to be "carefully watched" for the rest of my life. This is both good - because I get to hang on to my "security blanket" - AND bad, because I remain and always will be "high risk"...

Again - I know exactly how you feel, friend. I also know that you'll adjust and be OK with it, just takes some time. Going forward, remember the need to be ever vigilant about your health. Please - don't hesitate to call your onc immediately with any future concerns. Which, of course, I certainly hope you'll never have to do. And never, ever delay/skip all the other "regular" tests and checkups. Including ob/gyne, dentist, eye doctor, etc. ...


Kind regards, Susan

Eli,
Of course, you feel sad
Eli,
Of course, you feel sad and a little teary eyed. It's like someone grabbed your blankie and your binkie and you want them back. These visits are security. Our minds might tell us that this is good and we are better and all that but there is that darn little voice that whispers what if it comes back in 6 months and I haven't gone to the doctor. Nothing will reassure you right now, but it is time to take those baby steps to the next level. I think most of us felt that way as we transistioned to the longer visits. For me, I just told myself that this meant that I was on the right path and I was doing well. And I also remembered that if I had anything that troubled me I was free to call and have it checked out. I think that when we are told a year, we mentally think I can't see them for a year. That's not really the case. We could see them in a month if the need arose. So remember, although they want to see you in a year, they also want to see you if you think you need to be seen. Don't let the timeframe throw you for a loop. They are still totally there if you need them sooner. Hope this helps.
Stef

Eil
I think it's called relief. There has been so much sad news on the site in the past month. When we're told all is ok it's a bit overwhelming just like when first dx. We're relieved but still anxious. Take one day at a time and hope for the best.
{{hugs}} Char