uh-oh Second Opinion on my reoccurance

24

Comments

  • New Flower
    New Flower Member Posts: 4,294
    #22
    Moopy23 said:

    Big Differences and Choices
    Hi, Meena, you must have been taken aback by the dramatically different approaches of the two oncologists. I would be, anyway--it's a lot to take in. Choice is good, but sometimes stressful even for minor things, like toothpaste. You walk into the store and are confronted with dozens of choices, and choices within choices. Used to be, choosing a simple, mundane thing like toothpaste was easy, Crest or Colgate. Now you got miles of aisle space. For toothpaste, for heaven's sake.

    Me, I'd go with the kitchen sink approach, as Joe wrote. Whatever choice you make, the important thing is that you have options and are educating yourself so as to make the best one for yourself. And, whatever your choice, you will have lots of prayers going up for you and positive thoughts sent your way.

    You have to learn everything
    about state of the art research in your area. I know it does sound right, we want to trust doctors and believe that they know everything. More tests will be helpful. it make sense to decide when results are in.
    Hugs
  • roseann4
    roseann4 Member Posts: 992 Member
    #23
    New Flower said:

    You have to learn everything
    about state of the art research in your area. I know it does sound right, we want to trust doctors and believe that they know everything. More tests will be helpful. it make sense to decide when results are in.
    Hugs

    I would go for a tie breaker!
    With 2 such different approaches, I think I would meet with a 3rd oncologist. I think it was unkind to say you had an unnecessary mastectomy. Too late for that information to be helpful. Anyway, I would want to see one more person and see which direction that doc takes.

    Roseann
  • Wolfi
    Wolfi Member Posts: 425
    #24
    Comfortable?
    Meena,

    Which doctor makes you feel more comfortable? If I were in your situation I think I would try to get a 3rd opinion from another doctor since the two have such different treatment plans. Are either of these two specialists for your type of rare cancer? In the past I have contacted the Cancer Treatment Centers of America - they have counselors you can talk to online and they may be able to answer some questions for you.

    I wish you the best in deciding and hope your treatment goes well without any complications.

    Wolfi
  • jackiejhm
    jackiejhm Member Posts: 169
    #25
    Moopy23 said:

    Big Differences and Choices
    Hi, Meena, you must have been taken aback by the dramatically different approaches of the two oncologists. I would be, anyway--it's a lot to take in. Choice is good, but sometimes stressful even for minor things, like toothpaste. You walk into the store and are confronted with dozens of choices, and choices within choices. Used to be, choosing a simple, mundane thing like toothpaste was easy, Crest or Colgate. Now you got miles of aisle space. For toothpaste, for heaven's sake.

    Me, I'd go with the kitchen sink approach, as Joe wrote. Whatever choice you make, the important thing is that you have options and are educating yourself so as to make the best one for yourself. And, whatever your choice, you will have lots of prayers going up for you and positive thoughts sent your way.

    Yup- Kitchen sink time!
    I agree- and all of us will chip in as well!!! Dear, dear, Meena, you are in my prayers.xoxo
  • Megan M
    Megan M Member Posts: 3,000
    #26
    Hubby said:

    3rd Opinion
    I vote for the third opinion also; and then a fourth if necessary. With two such radically different opinions, you must be beside yourself.

    Bob

    I might go for a 3rd opinion
    I might go for a 3rd opinion too since they both differ so much. You think about it, and, let us know.

    Praying for you,

    Megan
  • Angie2U
    Angie2U Member Posts: 2,991
    #27
    Jean 0609 said:

    Dear Meena,
    Thanks for the update. However, I am saddened by the outcome. This is truly a very difficult decision that only you will be able to make. I know you feel comfortable with your current doctor and things seem to be okay now. I'm kind of new to all this breast cancer b.s., so I really don't have any answers. It does seem that other tests may be in order due to your pain, but I'm not sure. I'm sure the other wonderful ladies and gents on her will be able to offer more help than me. I just wanted to know that I am thinking about you and sending prayers your way, to help you with your decision. Hugs, Jean

    Your new oncologist
    Your new oncologist differing so much from your first one would overwhelm me too. And, only you can make the final decision.

    I would think that more tests should be run. I do like an aggressive doctor, as I feel they are really fighting for me. I never have liked a doctor that just sits back, even if I am comfortable with them.

    Good luck to you in whatever you decide. We all support you and care about you!


    Hugs, Angie
  • RE
    RE Member Posts: 4,591 Member
    #28
    Choices
    Oh Meena how frustrating for you. This is a very personal choice that only you can make, however since you are asking our opinion I will give you mine. I have always chosen to get the max thrown at my cancer to fight it off, the stronger the better as long as I can endure it. Cancer is a beast and left unchecked it will reek havoc on our bodies, I say get all the tests you can to ensure it is not lurking somewhere inside of you, better to know now than it would be to find out later. Now is always better then later when dealing with cancer, should you decide to stay with your current onco I would sit down and have a heart to heart with him explaining that you do not wish to wait and see how things are in 6 months they you would like a PET or MRI or CAT scan now if for no other reason than peace of mind. Please let us know how things go, you will be in my prayers.

    RE
  • New Flower
    New Flower Member Posts: 4,294
    #29
    Wolfi said:

    Comfortable?
    Meena,

    Which doctor makes you feel more comfortable? If I were in your situation I think I would try to get a 3rd opinion from another doctor since the two have such different treatment plans. Are either of these two specialists for your type of rare cancer? In the past I have contacted the Cancer Treatment Centers of America - they have counselors you can talk to online and they may be able to answer some questions for you.

    I wish you the best in deciding and hope your treatment goes well without any complications.

    Wolfi

    3-d opinion, and 4-th if it helps
    to make decision. I hope doctors would care about patients more than about their egos.
    I wish you the best treatment possible and t find a caring oncologist.
    Hugs
  • survivorbc09
    survivorbc09 Member Posts: 4,374 Member
    #30
    Wolfi said:

    Comfortable?
    Meena,

    Which doctor makes you feel more comfortable? If I were in your situation I think I would try to get a 3rd opinion from another doctor since the two have such different treatment plans. Are either of these two specialists for your type of rare cancer? In the past I have contacted the Cancer Treatment Centers of America - they have counselors you can talk to online and they may be able to answer some questions for you.

    I wish you the best in deciding and hope your treatment goes well without any complications.

    Wolfi

    If I were fighting the beast
    If I were fighting the beast again, I would throw everything that was available at it. But, you have to do what you want to do and what you feel is the right treatment for you.

    You are in my prayers,

    Jan
  • Snowkitty
    Snowkitty Member Posts: 295
    #31
    I vote for 3rd opinion
    Meena, people even get three quotes when doing home improvement & car repairs. You are worth much more than that.

    Take care,

    Cindy
  • creampuff91344
    creampuff91344 Member Posts: 988
    #32
    RE said:

    Choices
    Oh Meena how frustrating for you. This is a very personal choice that only you can make, however since you are asking our opinion I will give you mine. I have always chosen to get the max thrown at my cancer to fight it off, the stronger the better as long as I can endure it. Cancer is a beast and left unchecked it will reek havoc on our bodies, I say get all the tests you can to ensure it is not lurking somewhere inside of you, better to know now than it would be to find out later. Now is always better then later when dealing with cancer, should you decide to stay with your current onco I would sit down and have a heart to heart with him explaining that you do not wish to wait and see how things are in 6 months they you would like a PET or MRI or CAT scan now if for no other reason than peace of mind. Please let us know how things go, you will be in my prayers.

    RE

    My dear Meena, what a
    My dear Meena, what a delima. Making this decision is entirely up to you, but you have always been such a strong advocate of doing whatever it takes to keep you the healthiest. With two doctors butting heads like this, I would personally consider seeking a third opinion. Whatever your decision, in fighting breast cancer, MORE is better. I know it is not what we want to think about, but the more treatment given means the more we are fighting. Definitely if your second doctor has expressed his opinion about the treatment being stopped, this means that you do need more information to go by before making a change. I will be facing this same decision in a couple of weeks, and surely am not looking forward to probing into what is causing me back pain, joint pain, etc. However, that being said, when the time comes, I will be looking for the doctor that "throws the book" at my problem....no matter how uncomfortable I may be. My thoughts and prayers are with you meena, and know there are lots of others here who will back you no matter what you decide. We love you and your fight. Hugs, Judy
  • creampuff91344
    creampuff91344 Member Posts: 988
    #33
    RE said:

    Choices
    Oh Meena how frustrating for you. This is a very personal choice that only you can make, however since you are asking our opinion I will give you mine. I have always chosen to get the max thrown at my cancer to fight it off, the stronger the better as long as I can endure it. Cancer is a beast and left unchecked it will reek havoc on our bodies, I say get all the tests you can to ensure it is not lurking somewhere inside of you, better to know now than it would be to find out later. Now is always better then later when dealing with cancer, should you decide to stay with your current onco I would sit down and have a heart to heart with him explaining that you do not wish to wait and see how things are in 6 months they you would like a PET or MRI or CAT scan now if for no other reason than peace of mind. Please let us know how things go, you will be in my prayers.

    RE

    Sorry...double post. Darn
    Sorry...double post. Darn that chemo brain! Judy
  • meena1
    meena1 Member Posts: 1,003
    #34
    Snowkitty said:

    I vote for 3rd opinion
    Meena, people even get three quotes when doing home improvement & car repairs. You are worth much more than that.

    Take care,

    Cindy

    I am definitely going to go
    I am definitely going to go with the second opinion doc. I have googled him, i have also gone to 2 other breast cancer boards where he is well known and they have highly recommended him. I know my treatment will be very aggressive. He is an expert in Inflammatory breast cancer, i actually had my decision made when i posted this. take care
  • Ritzy
    Ritzy Member Posts: 4,381 Member
    #35
    meena1 said:

    I am definitely going to go
    I am definitely going to go with the second opinion doc. I have googled him, i have also gone to 2 other breast cancer boards where he is well known and they have highly recommended him. I know my treatment will be very aggressive. He is an expert in Inflammatory breast cancer, i actually had my decision made when i posted this. take care

    Whew! I am relieved and
    Whew! I am relieved and happy that you are going to follow the 2nd doctor's opinion and advice Meena. I was really hoping that you would. I do believe that we can't just sit back and wait for our doctor's to finally decide what to do with us. I have read about others on here where the doctor's just say..Well, come back in a couple of months and we will see how you are doing. I think the most aggressive treatment for you or anyone with a recurrence is the best way to go.

    You have to fight with both barrels! I really feel you are doing the right thing Meena and I pray that this new doctor and the new treatment will be the ticket!


    Good choice Meena! You are not only brave, much loved on here, but, very, very smart!

    Hugs to you and prayers,

    Sue :)
  • susie09
    susie09 Member Posts: 2,930
    #36
    m_azingrace said:

    Dilema..
    Meena1, for myself I would first want the most tests I could get. I do not see how it's possible to treat the beast unless you know where it is, and what kind of damage it may have already done. If Dr.#2 practiced with MD Anderson, you should know that he is probably one of the best. They don't hire anyone with shoddy credentials.

    It is a difficult decision, and you are right to take your time and weigh all the factors. First things first. Get all the tests you can get. If you want to stay with Dr. #1, then demand he at least do the MRI and PET scan, to find out where you stand, and see if his approach is indeed the best one. If he says you don't need these tests...well, then I would never mind how much I like him. The fact that you sought a second opinion means you are not totally sure his approach is the best one for you.

    My cancer is not inflammatory, however I do have mets to bone. I go to the MD Anderson Cancer Center extension in Albuquerque. Rads sound scarey. I'll have my first one on Thursday. I'm praying that you make the decision that ultimately will be the right one.

    Hugs, Gracie

    You know we are all always
    You know we are all always here for you! I know and pray that you will make the right choice as to what treatment and to what doctor you choose to follow.

    ♠♣ Susie ♠♣
  • KayNYC
    KayNYC Member Posts: 495 Member
    #37
    decisions
    Their having such different approaches to your treatment really boggles the mind. Good luck making the decision. It is not an easy one but the only one who can make it is you. I guess I would lean toward the doc that wants to fight with everything available and who will rely on the tests for confirmation of treatment results and status of the beast. It is hard to change docs and start anew.
    Thinking of you and sending you positive thoughts.
    Hugs,K
  • susie09
    susie09 Member Posts: 2,930
    #38
    KayNYC said:

    decisions
    Their having such different approaches to your treatment really boggles the mind. Good luck making the decision. It is not an easy one but the only one who can make it is you. I guess I would lean toward the doc that wants to fight with everything available and who will rely on the tests for confirmation of treatment results and status of the beast. It is hard to change docs and start anew.
    Thinking of you and sending you positive thoughts.
    Hugs,K

    I finally read all of the
    I finally read all of the posts here. There are so many as so many love you and admire you Meena. I am very happy to know that you are taking the aggressive treatment.

    Praying and sending you lots of strength,


    ♠♣ Susie ♠♣
  • survivorbc09
    survivorbc09 Member Posts: 4,374 Member
    #39
    jackiejhm said:

    Yup- Kitchen sink time!
    I agree- and all of us will chip in as well!!! Dear, dear, Meena, you are in my prayers.xoxo

    I have to agree too, kitchen
    I have to agree too, kitchen sink and all! You are my hero Meena!


    Hugs, Jan
  • Megan M
    Megan M Member Posts: 3,000
    #40
    creampuff91344 said:

    Sorry...double post. Darn
    Sorry...double post. Darn that chemo brain! Judy

    Just keep fighting this
    Just keep fighting this cancer with all that is offered to you Meena! You are a true warrior! Wishing you good luck and keep posting.


    Hugs, Megan
  • DianeBC
    DianeBC Member Posts: 3,881 Member
    #41
    RE said:

    Choices
    Oh Meena how frustrating for you. This is a very personal choice that only you can make, however since you are asking our opinion I will give you mine. I have always chosen to get the max thrown at my cancer to fight it off, the stronger the better as long as I can endure it. Cancer is a beast and left unchecked it will reek havoc on our bodies, I say get all the tests you can to ensure it is not lurking somewhere inside of you, better to know now than it would be to find out later. Now is always better then later when dealing with cancer, should you decide to stay with your current onco I would sit down and have a heart to heart with him explaining that you do not wish to wait and see how things are in 6 months they you would like a PET or MRI or CAT scan now if for no other reason than peace of mind. Please let us know how things go, you will be in my prayers.

    RE

    I have to say too that you
    I have to say too that you should do all that you can, every test that you can to fight this cancer! If you still need more opinions, go get another one even.

    You will be in my prayers!

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