I BEAT DOWN the OXY DEVIL!!!!!!!! YEEHAAA!!!!

Well, yes , it was he&&.....I mean HE&&. My onc started me a tapering program from home. At that time i was eating 12 oxy per day for my back pain. MY BACK IS IN BEAUTIFUL SHAPE, by the way....and knock on wood!!!! BUTTT...the big prob was getting off those oxy's...I made it myself at home and got down to taking 2 per day. That was it. I needed professional help and was put in a detox center. OMG...how friggin creepy. It was a small wing on a local hospital and it was half crazy people and half doppers. It was...yeah...creepy. When I first got there they took me to my room. I had to lift my bra and let it all fall out....you know...just in case I was hiding something inside those big AA's.....lol.. Then I had to pull my granny panties down to my knees.....shake them around...wierd...then they took my shoe laces. I realize this is all procedure and for good reason but I just had never been thru anything like this and some of it struck me funny and then I thought they were gonna put me with the lunny doppers. So I maintained. No tv, no phones...cell either...no pc's...not even clocks. By the time I got situated in my disgusting bed I was already having the shakes as it had been over 8 hours since my last dose of oxys...and i was not getting anymore. I prayed..A LOT...ALL NITE...... I made it into my second day...i don't know how...oh my gosh...it was horrible. All I did for 48 hrs straight was kick my legs in the air...kick them side by side... kick them like a kid having a temper fit.......my arms were just as bad... it looked like i was trying to beat the crap out of the air.... i pulled out what hair i had left....i screamed...screamed....cried...cried...screamed...begged whoever would listen for something...i was gut cramping....drooling...NO..foaming at the mouth...so much so that it had run down my chin and just sat the and caked up...looked like i had a beard...YUK! They had to put pads on the bars on both sides because i kept hitting my head on the bars....There is NO WAY in hell my family could have handled me. I NEVER wud have put them thru that. Since I had gotten all the way down to taking just 2 per day they just had to get me thru the hard part. For that, I am eternally grateful to these people...these saints that you hate cause you think they are not helping you ...until your head gets back together and you find they actually saved you. I was released on my 3rd day only because i had came in pretty advanced. They still told me I would be dead tired for days.... considering I had just beat the crap out of myself for 48hrs. They were right. My gosh i was drained. i could not eat, could not sleep, didn't was to talk, just layed on the couch for days...then i started getting headaches...figured out that was from no food...after i ate a little...very little....i felt better. Each day is getting easier and easier as my appetite rebuilds as well as my strength. Man, i bet i could really whip someone's A$$ can I KNOW I sure whipped my own. Everything is moving in a positive direction

I want to thank your ALL for your prayers and thoughts and kind and even funny words. I could not resond til now but it was nice to see my family was concerned about me....love you all

Jennie