You Might Be A Cancer Survivor If ........

2

Comments

  • KathiM
    KathiM Member Posts: 8,028 Member
    #22
    maglets said:

    laughing too
    Kim I have those moments also....always in yoga and dare not fart just in case it's more.

    Kathi how bout you enter a public building and immediately search out possible bathroom sites....how busy are they...can you find one that's isolated and for sure check paper availability. I even travel with moist little bum wipes for the nasty little surprises..

    gosh I hope no "normal" people read these forums....they would think we are poop possessed....teheheh

    Most people think that it's the heart that runs the body.....
    Others, the mind....

    But we semi-colons KNOW which part it is!!! (Don't we now?)

    HUgs, Kathi
  • coloCan
    coloCan Member Posts: 1,944 Member
    #23
    just4Brooks said:

    Or when.....
    I agree with Kim but on a different angle. I hate it when you make a mad dash across the house jumping over things, pushing kids out of the way, almost knocking down the bathroom door while pulling down your pants while in the air jumping onto the toilet only to hear just a little “Poof” sound. Is that it? I ran like hell for a little fart?


    Brooks

    Whats that old ditty? Here I sit, broken hearted......
    Came to sheit and only farted.....Hope your producing some solid ones there Brooks.....steve

    (I well remember when I'd never know what was gonna come out;now only my stoma knows)
  • coloCan
    coloCan Member Posts: 1,944 Member
    #24
    KathiM said:

    Most people think that it's the heart that runs the body.....
    Others, the mind....

    But we semi-colons KNOW which part it is!!! (Don't we now?)

    HUgs, Kathi

    I'll butt out of that one
    and sit down gently......
  • lisa42
    lisa42 Member Posts: 3,625 Member
    #25
    Hilarious!
    Hilarious! These are so funny, but true! The one where you passed gas while out somewhere or in the car and it doesn't feel like it was just gas... that worried ride home in the car, trying to sit on just one buttcheek in case, then racing to the bathroom- relief- nothing came out! (I've also had the reverse too- such fun).

    These are funny and embarrasing (that one too- we've all had to em BARR **** more than we'd like- "Okay, next? Who else wants to take a look?!" lol!
    It's nice that we can laugh about it all with each other. We'd cry if we couldn't find someone to share it all with and laugh about it.

    Have a great day, everyone!
    Lisa
  • GOOFYLADIE
    GOOFYLADIE Member Posts: 232 Member
    #26
    lisa42 said:

    Hilarious!
    Hilarious! These are so funny, but true! The one where you passed gas while out somewhere or in the car and it doesn't feel like it was just gas... that worried ride home in the car, trying to sit on just one buttcheek in case, then racing to the bathroom- relief- nothing came out! (I've also had the reverse too- such fun).

    These are funny and embarrasing (that one too- we've all had to em BARR **** more than we'd like- "Okay, next? Who else wants to take a look?!" lol!
    It's nice that we can laugh about it all with each other. We'd cry if we couldn't find someone to share it all with and laugh about it.

    Have a great day, everyone!
    Lisa

    You might be a cancer survivor if
    Your crackin a smile, not saying a word, because you know you can relate to most; if not all the above comments!!!
    Make it a great day all!
    Goofyladie (Cass)
  • msccolon
    msccolon Member Posts: 1,917 Member
    #27
    just4Brooks said:

    Or when.....
    I agree with Kim but on a different angle. I hate it when you make a mad dash across the house jumping over things, pushing kids out of the way, almost knocking down the bathroom door while pulling down your pants while in the air jumping onto the toilet only to hear just a little “Poof” sound. Is that it? I ran like hell for a little fart?


    Brooks

    HAHAHAHAHA!
    That's hilarious, only because I think we've all been there! But you don't DARE assume the NEXT one will also just be gas!
    mary
  • Buzzard
    Buzzard Member Posts: 3,043 Member
    #28
    GOOFYLADIE said:

    You might be a cancer survivor if
    Your crackin a smile, not saying a word, because you know you can relate to most; if not all the above comments!!!
    Make it a great day all!
    Goofyladie (Cass)

    You know your a survivor when......
    you wake to the smell of your wifes halitosis.............and it is great !!!!!
  • RickMurtagh
    RickMurtagh Member Posts: 587 Member
    #29
    maglets said:

    laughing too
    Kim I have those moments also....always in yoga and dare not fart just in case it's more.

    Kathi how bout you enter a public building and immediately search out possible bathroom sites....how busy are they...can you find one that's isolated and for sure check paper availability. I even travel with moist little bum wipes for the nasty little surprises..

    gosh I hope no "normal" people read these forums....they would think we are poop possessed....teheheh

    we are
    we are poop obsessed!

    Since my takedown I travel with a day pack filled with a complete change of clothes, depends, guards for men, wipes, calmoseptine (a barrier), tucks. Immodium, GasEx and Lomotil - everything I need to survive in the wild. Still I like it better than my emergency pack I used to carry when I had my ileo - I just had way too many opportunities to use that one.
  • Kathryn_in_MN
    Kathryn_in_MN Member Posts: 1,252 Member
    #30
    These are all great. Thanks
    These are all great. Thanks everyone for the laughs!
  • AnnaLeigh
    AnnaLeigh Member Posts: 187 Member
    #31
    You might be a cancer survivor if........
    You are absolutely elated that you have NOT lost any weight.

    You know how to push the correct buttons on your chemo pump to "add more volume" when it is beeping and the nurse is nowhere to be found.
  • AnnaLeigh
    AnnaLeigh Member Posts: 187 Member
    #32
    AnnaLeigh said:

    You might be a cancer survivor if........
    You are absolutely elated that you have NOT lost any weight.

    You know how to push the correct buttons on your chemo pump to "add more volume" when it is beeping and the nurse is nowhere to be found.

    you might be a cancer survivor if........
    You know that 5FU is not a bad word.

    I think this was originally posted by geotina somewhere else on the board. But this is funny. I don't care who you are. This is funny.
  • Annabelle41415
    Annabelle41415 Member Posts: 6,742 Member
    #33
    AnnaLeigh said:

    you might be a cancer survivor if........
    You know that 5FU is not a bad word.

    I think this was originally posted by geotina somewhere else on the board. But this is funny. I don't care who you are. This is funny.

    Yeah
    Yeah I have thought about that many times while receiving it. Actually then it did mean that :)

    Kim
  • Annabelle41415
    Annabelle41415 Member Posts: 6,742 Member
    #34
    Supplements
    You take Metamucil to bind things up, but also take the immodium on the days we can't stop going, probiotics to make sure that we stay regular, prune juice to keep things moving, and your diet has changed because you need all that fiber to keep you bulked up.

    Kim
  • AnnaLeigh
    AnnaLeigh Member Posts: 187 Member
    #35
    Our Mothers knew what to do


    ~Remember when your mother said "Wear clean underwear in case you GET in an accident"?

    Now you bring clean underwear in case you HAVE an accident!
  • mik3
    mik3 Member Posts: 5
    #36
    AnnaLeigh said:

    you might be a cancer survivor if........
    You know that 5FU is not a bad word.

    I think this was originally posted by geotina somewhere else on the board. But this is funny. I don't care who you are. This is funny.

    5FU
    When I complained about all the bad things that 5FU caused the technician said "That's why they call it FU". Now I could laugh.
  • qwe
    qwe Member Posts: 124
    #37
    AnnaLeigh said:

    Our Mothers knew what to do


    ~Remember when your mother said "Wear clean underwear in case you GET in an accident"?

    Now you bring clean underwear in case you HAVE an accident!

    LMAO!!!!!!!!

    LMAO!!!!!!!!
  • maglets
    maglets Member Posts: 2,576 Member
    #38
    qwe said:

    LMAO!!!!!!!!

    LMAO!!!!!!!!

    hahah
    hahah keep em coming pooh heads.....

    you might be a cancer survivor if even a simple ice cream cone is enough fat to give you intestinal cramps for five hours.

    you might be cancer survivor if you ever use the "cancer Card" and dodge out of doing something that you don't want to do by saying......oh I don't think I could do that....or I usually have a nap at that time, or i usually like to be in bed by 7

    mags
  • AnnaLeigh
    AnnaLeigh Member Posts: 187 Member
    #39
    Your definitions change
    Your definition of "getting a little action" means you don't need to take any fiber today.
  • SemiColon2009
    SemiColon2009 Member Posts: 1
    #40
    You Might Be A Cancer Survivor If ........
    You can count your chemo treatments by looking at the tree rings in your finger and toe nails.

    This is one of those you have to have "been there done that" to think it is funny but it works for me.
  • AnnaLeigh
    AnnaLeigh Member Posts: 187 Member
    #41
    I used to think it meant something different
    Your definition of an "All Nighter" means you slept through all night without having to get up for a bathroom excursion.

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