You Might Be A Cancer Survivor If ........

AnnaLeigh
AnnaLeigh Member Posts: 187 Member
edited March 2014 in Colorectal Cancer #1
You might be a cancer survivor if -

You commonly use the abbreviations - dx, hx, rx, sx, tx - and you have never been to medical school.

You can rattle off the brand names and generic names of medications and their uses faster than the nurse can.

You can convert MLs to Ounces.

Boost and Ensure are entrees.

Your expelled gas can carry a tune.

You get excited because your poop was brown or because your urine was light yellow.
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Comments

  • Eltina21
    Eltina21 Member Posts: 173 Member
    #2
    Cancer Survivor
    Great humor. Thanks. I definitely can relate to these.
  • PhillieG
    PhillieG Member Posts: 4,866 Member
    #3
    My Favorite Saying is...
    You might be a cancer survivor if - you die from something else!
    ;-)
  • coloCan
    coloCan Member Posts: 1,944 Member
    #4
    PhillieG said:

    My Favorite Saying is...
    You might be a cancer survivor if - you die from something else!
    ;-)

    You've heard of the Badge of Honor?
    Well, I proudly wear a BAG of honor, tho what it contains may not be deemed by some as honorable, it IS an indication of life; a sacrifice made in hopes of beating the BEAST .....steve
  • Kerry S
    Kerry S Member Posts: 606 Member
    #5
    PhillieG said:

    My Favorite Saying is...
    You might be a cancer survivor if - you die from something else!
    ;-)

    You know when you need a second opinion when
    You know when you need a second opinion when:

    While waiting in the exam room you notice brochures for a funeral home next to the free samples of Miralax.
  • maglets
    maglets Member Posts: 2,576 Member
    #6
    Kerry S said:

    You know when you need a second opinion when
    You know when you need a second opinion when:

    While waiting in the exam room you notice brochures for a funeral home next to the free samples of Miralax.

    survive
    you actually know the meaning of NED....not a guy from a movie

    mags
  • KathiM
    KathiM Member Posts: 8,028 Member
    #7
    I am laughing sooooo hard!!!
    ....and one more, using the name of a toy, playdough, as a description of the goal in the bathroom...

    ROFLMAO!!!

    Hugs, Kathi
  • coloCan
    coloCan Member Posts: 1,944 Member
    #8
    Kerry S said:

    You know when you need a second opinion when
    You know when you need a second opinion when:

    While waiting in the exam room you notice brochures for a funeral home next to the free samples of Miralax.

    That would get me running, Kerry, and not to the bathroom....
    Would also make me wonder whats in that free sample of Miralax.....steve
  • Kerry S
    Kerry S Member Posts: 606 Member
    #9
    while you get zapped
    You know your radiation treatments are being done in a “down home” country hospital when the radiation tech puts his lunch on your **** to warm it up while you get zapped.
  • taraHK
    taraHK Member Posts: 1,952 Member
    #10
    hilarious
    These are hilarious -- you brightened my day.

    Here's my two -- from yesterday alone (I could make quite a list from the last 7.5 years!).

    *You know you are a cancer survivor when you have had drugs from A (Avastin) to Z (Zometa)

    and

    *You know you are a cancer survivor when you know how to flick the IV tube, like the nurses do, to get rid of those little bubbles

    Tara
  • elizabethgd
    elizabethgd Member Posts: 145
    #11
    taraHK said:

    hilarious
    These are hilarious -- you brightened my day.

    Here's my two -- from yesterday alone (I could make quite a list from the last 7.5 years!).

    *You know you are a cancer survivor when you have had drugs from A (Avastin) to Z (Zometa)

    and

    *You know you are a cancer survivor when you know how to flick the IV tube, like the nurses do, to get rid of those little bubbles

    Tara

    You guys are great!!
    Thanks for the humor I really needed some chuckles.. I don't post much,, but appreciate what everyone has to say...
  • khl8
    khl8 Member Posts: 807
    #12
    elizabethgd said:

    You guys are great!!
    Thanks for the humor I really needed some chuckles.. I don't post much,, but appreciate what everyone has to say...

    You might be a colorectal cancer survivor if
    You bend over to pick something up off the floor and have a flashback!!
  • Annabelle41415
    Annabelle41415 Member Posts: 6,742 Member
    #13
    This Is Gross
    This is gross but has happened to me since. You think you are passing gas and then discover - opps it's not :)

    Kim
  • Kerry S
    Kerry S Member Posts: 606 Member
    #14
    Annabelle41415 said:

    This Is Gross
    This is gross but has happened to me since. You think you are passing gas and then discover - opps it's not :)

    Kim

    Their called
    Kim,
    We be calling them sharts.
  • Annabelle41415
    Annabelle41415 Member Posts: 6,742 Member
    #15
    Kerry S said:

    Their called
    Kim,
    We be calling them sharts.

    Sharts
    Oh Kerry you are too funny. I have to remember that one :)

    Kim
  • just4Brooks
    just4Brooks Member Posts: 980 Member
    #16
    Annabelle41415 said:

    Sharts
    Oh Kerry you are too funny. I have to remember that one :)

    Kim

    Sharts
    only funny when you have them!!!

    Brooks
  • AnnaLeigh
    AnnaLeigh Member Posts: 187 Member
    #17
    You might be a cancer survivor if........
    Your trash cans are labeled Regular, Recycle, and Medical Waste.

    You refuse to leave the treatment center until the nurse remembers to use the heparin and flushes your port.

    The drug store drive-thru knows your car by sight and has the medications ready without any questions.

    You know exactly down-to-the-minute when your pump will run out of 5-Fu.
  • KathiM
    KathiM Member Posts: 8,028 Member
    #18
    AnnaLeigh said:

    You might be a cancer survivor if........
    Your trash cans are labeled Regular, Recycle, and Medical Waste.

    You refuse to leave the treatment center until the nurse remembers to use the heparin and flushes your port.

    The drug store drive-thru knows your car by sight and has the medications ready without any questions.

    You know exactly down-to-the-minute when your pump will run out of 5-Fu.

    I am laughing sooooo hard!!!
    And, then again, all of what you say is true!!!!

    ....You check sunscreen labels to make sure they are safe for hair folicles!

    For the CRC survivor: When traveling, you ALWAYS check the bathroom first for a supply of toilet paper and seat covers!!!!

    Hugs, Kathi
  • just4Brooks
    just4Brooks Member Posts: 980 Member
    #19
    KathiM said:

    I am laughing sooooo hard!!!
    And, then again, all of what you say is true!!!!

    ....You check sunscreen labels to make sure they are safe for hair folicles!

    For the CRC survivor: When traveling, you ALWAYS check the bathroom first for a supply of toilet paper and seat covers!!!!

    Hugs, Kathi

    Or when.....
    I agree with Kim but on a different angle. I hate it when you make a mad dash across the house jumping over things, pushing kids out of the way, almost knocking down the bathroom door while pulling down your pants while in the air jumping onto the toilet only to hear just a little “Poof” sound. Is that it? I ran like hell for a little fart?


    Brooks
  • Kerry S
    Kerry S Member Posts: 606 Member
    #20
    just4Brooks said:

    Or when.....
    I agree with Kim but on a different angle. I hate it when you make a mad dash across the house jumping over things, pushing kids out of the way, almost knocking down the bathroom door while pulling down your pants while in the air jumping onto the toilet only to hear just a little “Poof” sound. Is that it? I ran like hell for a little fart?


    Brooks

    Hang in there
    Brooks,
    How well I remember this last Christmas. My 2 sons and their families were all here. This farm house only has 2 baths and I just had to tell them that our bath was off limits. There were a few times I had to clean the damn floor. Hang in there as the problem is now gone for me.
  • maglets
    maglets Member Posts: 2,576 Member
    #21
    KathiM said:

    I am laughing sooooo hard!!!
    And, then again, all of what you say is true!!!!

    ....You check sunscreen labels to make sure they are safe for hair folicles!

    For the CRC survivor: When traveling, you ALWAYS check the bathroom first for a supply of toilet paper and seat covers!!!!

    Hugs, Kathi

    laughing too
    Kim I have those moments also....always in yoga and dare not fart just in case it's more.

    Kathi how bout you enter a public building and immediately search out possible bathroom sites....how busy are they...can you find one that's isolated and for sure check paper availability. I even travel with moist little bum wipes for the nasty little surprises..

    gosh I hope no "normal" people read these forums....they would think we are poop possessed....teheheh

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