Just diagnosed with Invasive Ductal Carcinoma on 4/8/10. I am scared and extremely sad! This all hap

Hi gobluegirl
Welcome, I have IDC and have had a lumpectomy. I was DX last April 09 and I did the chemo and Radiation. I know how scared you are and yes everything is moving fast. Waiting on results is the hardest. You have to trust in your medical team that you are getting the best of care. IDC is an aggressive cancer,but it can be managed. All this stuff they will be telling you is very scary. It might help if you took someone with you to your next Dr appt. There is so much information your not going to be able to take it all in. I can tell you that Chemo is doable and so is radiation. Don't worry about the grade so much, just do what they tell you to do and you will get through this. There are many here to guide you through. Your not alone. As hard as this sounds, take it a day at a time.

Hello. My heart sank when I
Hello. My heart sank when I read your post. I am 36 and have an 8 year old daughter. I know you are just beside yourself right now. I know it's hard to wrap your head around it and it is even harder to explain it to your children. I hope you have a good support group around you to help you through this. There are a few good books to help explain to children that Mommy has cancer. If and when you would like I could get you the titles. That helped us a lot. About being worried that your doctors are not telling you something...from my experience they have nothing to lose but to be brutally honest with you. You have every right to ask them whatever you want and if you don't understand something ask until you do. And if you just want to outright ask them if you are going to die, then do it. I certainly did. It was a relief to ask and more of a relief to hear, "NO." It will move fast, but don't let any doctors rush you into decisions. It's your body and your right to stop and think about things if you need to. It is always good to take someone with you to your appointments. They can take notes and hear exactly what you hear, but aren't hearing. Just knowing you have support with you makes it much better. I hope this helps some. I wish I could hug you! Please let me know if I can do anything for you. I just joined this group, and all these amazing survivors and care givers are amazing and supportive. A breast cancer sisterhood is like no other. Hugs!

gobluegirl90 said:

Crying like a baby now again...watching my kids sleep
I thank you so much for your kind words. I seemed to have one good day and then a bad day. Going to work is soooo hard..but it helps to keep my mind busy or I would just sit and cry all day long. I try not to cry in front of the kids. I would like those books you offered to me. I am getting a MRI tomorrow. My Dr said I can have the lumpectomy as early as late next week and get my chemo going and then onto radiation. From the biopsy path. report it is saying Invasive ductal carcinoma 1.3cm, so why the MRI, to make sure they check the other breast to make sure they don't miss anything. My BF moved to Las Vegas 2 weeks before i I found the lump and was told I have breast cancer, they say STAGE I at this point, but i am sure the MRI results could change that too. Any good books for me to understand? lol This site it amazing. But i keep crying every time I get on this site, but my RN/hand holder said that was good to cry. My mom and entire family are in Ohio. I have my husband, 2 kids and my mother-in-law and great friends at work and parents of my kids sports teams. But nobody that truly knows what absolute life altering news Cancer does to you. I need to take a zanaxx and get some sleep......sleep i don't remember what that is, i have not slept more than 2 hours at a time since 4/8/10. Thank you so much. I forgot, did you have a choice of a lumpectomy or not? As of today my surgeon says i am excellent for lumpectomy due to the size. But, part of me wants a full blown bilateral mastectomy so it will just go away and lesson my chances of re-occurrence? i just want the tumor and cancer gone. PS. I loved you pics. I have decided I am shaving mine too when the time comes, i can at least control that part of the cancer. thanks for listening to me ramble. HUGS to you too!.

Do what you must
Take the Xanax--I did--and ask for a sleep aid as well--I did. My dr told me sleep and lowered stress were important. The MRI locates the tumor precisely and helps your surgeon plan the surgery. Ask if they will be doing pathology while you're on the operating table. It's better if they can. I had the same diagnosis, had the lumpectomy, they were able to determine that they needed to take a little more tissue so I had clean margins all the way around. This saved me a second surgery. They also did path on two lymph nodes, found they needed to take more. So having the surgery done in a larger hospital is worthwhile. As to full mastectomy, if your dr is saying lumpectomy is sufficient think carefully before you do more. The mastectomy will incapacitate you more, and you may have trouble dealing with household chores. I ended up a stage 2A, had chemo and radiation. Certainly not fun but pretty routine prescription. I hate that you're dealing with this so young, with young children. Ask lots of questions, get a second opinion if you're not comfortable with the first, and go for the best care. You and your family deserve it. Lots of love and support from all of us whose footsteps you are following. We are strong and so are you.

natly15 said:

Welcome to the boards. Wish
Welcome to the boards. Wish you didnt have to be here, but it really is one of the best places for support and info. so many younger women are getting BC. You will find some of those women on this website. BC it seems is no respector of age or gender.

I also had IDC, but mine was stage 2. I had 2 surgeries, 8 rounds of chemo which I just completed 2 weeks ago, and now I'm getting ready to do radiation. Had my biopsy last June, lumpectomy in July, and removal of additional lymph nodes in August. Started chemo Oct 6 of last year.

Yes it's scary, but with todays technology we can all live long productive lifes. You will see that we are warriors and survivors who are beating BC. You are not alone! All of us on these boards are either in treatment or have completed treatment. Dont worry. Do what you need to do to beat this "beast". Lots of cyber hugs being sent your way. Keep posting here you will find a wealth of knowledge and encouragement.

I am so sorry. But, you
I am so sorry. But, you have found a great supportive group of bc survivors that will help you and support you. Good luck!

So glad you found this site,
So glad you found this site, but so sorry you have recieved this news. I too am fairly new here. Diagnosed 2/23, IBC, stage 1, grade 1, .08 cm. I remember feeling so positive about the biopsy, so when the surgeon told me it was cancer, I was in shock, couldnt believe her, I remember saying, really, no way!! I knew she was going to give me a lot of information, and I didnt have anyone with me to help remember....So I focused on her eyes, and tried to stay very focused. I didnt want to miss a thing. The worst thing was having to tell my husband, daughters, mother and sisters. It broke their hearts. I cried all that first day, then for periods during the following couple of weeks. I also continued working to try and keep my mind occupied on something else. The cancer is all consuming, especially when you lay down to sleep, your mind just will not rest.....My husband and I decided in the very beginning that a bi-lateral mastectomy was our choice, and my surgeon agreed that either way, it was totally my decision, and what would give me peace of mind. We felt that the chance of reoccurance would be much less with them gone. I am 50, and didnt want to worry every time I had to return for mammograms. My surgery was 3/16, with immediate reconstruction. As the time got closer to that date, It was so hard to admit that they were going, I had such grief at their loss. My first week home after surgery, the acceptance was difficult, I cried the first few days, then forced myself to really look at them, and decided they are actully just fine. I have had 3 fills so far, and doing fine. My path report came back great, all margins clear, and no nodes involved. I am now waiting for the results on the genetic testing to see if I score low, and no additional treatments, or a high score and will consider treatment options. My oncologist is very optimistic that the results will be good. It is so very important that you are comfortable with your doctors. if you arent, get 2nd and 3rd opinions if needed until you do. My surgeon, and plastic surgeon were wonderful, but I did get a 2nd opinion for my oncologist. This is all so frightening, and I also had no one to talk to who had been here, so I found this site, and am so very grateful for the wonderful women here. They have helped me along each and every step of this journey. So, talk to your surgeon, you want to know all of your options so you can make your mose educated decision, follow your heart, it will let you know when you have made the right choice, you will feel at peace. I am praying that you will feel strength, and comfort as you proceed down this path. Keep posting, it really does help.
Karen

Books for children
Hi! I hope today finds you better and your MRI went okay. I am listing a few books that my daughter really liked reading and we would sit together and read them or look at the pictures and she would ask questions. It is always best you may want to skim over them before introducing them to your children.

Butterfly Kisses and Wishes on Wings (Ellen McVicker) my friend actually emailed the author and bought Erin the book and the author wrote a sweet note to her and signed the book.

My Mommy Has Breast Cancer (Gina Wright)

Michael's Mommy Has Breast Cancer (Lisa Torrey)

The Paper Chain (Claire Blake Eliza Blanchard Kathy Parkinson)

Just know we are all thinking of you and sending you hugs and support!

Hi Gobluegirl
I was diagnosed 3/2 with IDC with a 2.2 cm tumor with 1 node positive, so I'm having to do chemo and radiation too. It is stage 2A, grade 1. I just started today on taxotere and cytoxan. So far the only side effect I have had is that I'm really hungry. Maybe it's the steroids?? Maybe it's the relief of getting the chemo started and it not being horrible so far. I know how overwhelmed you must feel though. Hearing the words "you have cancer" is life altering and until a person hears those words about themselves, they really can't understand what it feels like. That's why this website is so great! You are in my prayers. Please don't hesitate to ask questions or just vent your feelings. It can be good for you.

feel for you
goblue90.... I feel for you, I was in the same place last year.. 36 mother of a 6, 4, and 2 year old... and IDC stage 2b with grade 3 cancer cells... Never sick in my life and no medical problems.. scared to death to say the least....

Now, a little over a year later... been through a double mastectomy with reconstruction, chemo, and radiation... and I am doing well!

I know you are scared... for the fist time you look at your children and wonder if you will ever seen them grow up.. Scared of the treatments that are ahead of you..

You are not alone.. You will find the strength and pull from the energy of your family and kids to get you through the next year. The road is not easy by any means but you can do it..

I know its hard to imagine why you have to do all the treatments for stage 1.. but remember in younger woman.. the cancer cells are generally very aggressive so the purpose of the chemo is to cleanse your blood of any mircoscopic cancer cells that might have escaped.. and radiation is status quo with lumpectomy..

As for going to die??????? remember this the spectrum of cancer has a far left and a far right.. and there is no reason to not believe that you are on the far right of that spectrum.... I remember people constantly telling me... "your going to be fine" and my response was " I have to!... I have no intentions of leaving my children motherless"

You will find such strength from the woman on this sight... We are all here to help you through your journey

sending you a (((hug)))