Nervous up-coming Onc visit

Hi everyone...Well this is the end of my 10 week chemo break, and I go see the Onc, this Friday. Of course now all the crazy fear, and what if's return..and I'm fighting to stay positive...but it's so hard!!!At my last visit I was taken off the Gemzar 1 cycle early because I was going into congestive heart failure, and my body was just too weak to take any more chemo at that time. My ca-125 was 14. During this scary time a ct scan was done of my chest(first one ever), and nodules were noted on my left lung, as well as an enlarged lymph node.I think at this visit they will order a ct scan(from the neck down) to see if these are just benign nodules or worse...cancer that has metatzied and is growing. My last ca-125 was 38.5, but I was so sick then that I figure that was the cause of the elevated ca-125 result. I really hate this time before the visit especially when so much was left up in the air. I'm asking for prayer ladies, for strength and good test results. I would like to go through the holidays without being sick and on chemo. For the past two winter holidays I have either been on chemo, or having a zillion tests done because a recurrence is suspected.Thanks in advance...((((hugz))) to all of you...Joanne