2 Year Anniversary

Hello everyone,

On October 4, 2004 I found myself celebrating my 27th birthday in a cold hospital getting a colonoscopy because of blood in my stool. During the scope, they found a single large juvenile polyp. The GI doc said not to worry, but in hindsight, I think he knew.

One year ago today, in fact almost to the hour, I received the heart-wrenching news that I had cancer. I could hear it in his voice even before he actually spoke the words. I remember thinking, "please don't say it. Please don't let it be true." I remember thinking, "I need to let him get around to just saying it his own way." I remember I had my mom on the other line at the time and just dropping to my knees crying and telling her, "Mom, I have cancer. CANCER!" I remember that my sleeping one year old daughter was the biggest thing on my mind and just repeating, "I'm too young to die. I can't leave my baby."

I didn't think I was going to get through this. I didn't think I was going to live to see another birthday.

I found myself in the surgeons office the very same day and scheduled for surgery three days later. I have never been so scared in my life. I just wanted it out of me. I was so scared that they were going to open me up and be forced to close me right back up because there was nothing they could do.

Thankfully, I lost the cancer and some colon that day. I had one affected node, which made me stage III.

A few weeks later I started six months of chemo.

I can't believe it has been two years. Thankfully, each of my scans has come back NED. I am scheduled for my annual scope on the 16th and will be getting my cat scanned in November... I am scared once again. These tests are so hard. But I believe that this too shall pass.

Thank you all for being here and being such a supportive group. I wish I would have found you sooner. There are so many people here to give inspiration each and every day. You are so brave and I love you all!

Patricia