my mother past with breast cancer 3 years ago ....

moms1baby Member Posts: 2
edited March 2014 in Breast Cancer #1
my mom was the most important thing in the world to me. she past when i was 9 i am now 14 . i saw alot of what peole today are going through . i have really givin up on myself. but have managed to accept the fact she isnt around. i have a very high risk of getting this too. i really need some advice can anyone help me?


  • hummingbyrd
    hummingbyrd Member Posts: 950 Member
    I'm so sorry. I have 2 boys 13 and 11 and my only fear is leaving them behind. I don't want them to be hurt.
    What kind of advice do you need? I'll be glad to help any way that I can. My name is hummingbyrd and you can email me on this site.
  • cruf
    cruf Member Posts: 908
    Hi! I'm so sorry you lost your mom! It's a very scarey time! My daughter was the same age you are now when I was diagnosed. I was so afraid I would leave her but I was lucky to have gotten it early. You are very young to worry so much about getting breast cancer.This is a time you should be enjoying life, having fun, starting to notice boys etc.. Try not to dwell on "what if I get cancer!" It's very possible you won't ever get it ! All you can do now is to move on with your life. Be aware of your body. Check your breasts every month but you're still growing so you'll probably feel lots of things that are perfectly normal. Have you ever talked with your doctor? Let him/her know of your fears. They will be able to direct you. Remember, Breast Cancer doesn't always kill everybody if gotten early. Unfortunately, you lost someone very special to you. Please feel free to write to me and ask any questions you may have. You can write to me here or at Take care! HUGS!! Cathy
  • marytres
    marytres Member Posts: 144
    I'm so sorry for your mom. My girls were 9 and 12 when I found out about my cancer. Doctor told me I should have my daughters check with a mammogram when they're around 18. You should ask a doctor too. If you need advice or help please e-mail me or any of us at any time. Hugs, Marie
  • inkblot
    inkblot Member Posts: 698 Member

    I'm so very sorry for your loss. I lost my Mother when I was quite young, in an auto accident and I understand how it feels.

    I would not think that you need to be worrying about getting breast cancer. This is not a time in your life when you should be thinking about such things! I have never personally heard of anyone so young as yourself having it! And I've talked with hundreds of women. You said that you have a very high risk of getting it too. Is there a particular reason you think so?

    I'm sure that your family loves and cares for you very much. If you have an aunt or grandmother to whom you're close, share how you feel and the worries you have about breast cancer, with them. If there's no one with whom you're comfortable talking about it, then talk to your school counselor. I echo the advise of several of the ladies here, to also talk to your own doctor about it. I'm concerned about your saying that
    you've given up on yourself. What does that mean exactly?

    I can tell you that your life is just really beginning. The whole world is out there just waiting for you! You should be spending lots of time with your friends, involved in your academics, extra curricular activities and/or sports, school plays, clubs, etc.. Soon, it will be time to begin thinking about what kind of career you're interested in and begin planning for that, once you graduate high school. A very busy time in a young ladies life.

    I'm a Mom of a 15 year old who was 13 when I was diagnosed with breast cancer. I can tell you that the whole time I was undergoing treatment, he was a big inspiration to me. I could see the whole world in his eyes. Mom's are a bit nuts that way! LOL! Your Mom would be very proud of you and you must remember how much she loved and cared for you and all the wonderful things she wanted for you.

    I don't know what kind of advice you need right now, but if you can be specific, there are many ladies here who will be happy to help in any way they can. We're all women here and we've all experienced breast cancer and most of us are also Mom's. I hope that helps in some way.

    Please let us know how you're doing and remember that we care.

    Love, light and laughter,
  • kamehameha6470
    kamehameha6470 Member Posts: 33
    I'm so very sorry for your loss. My mother passed from colon cancer when I was 24 and my baby sister was 16. Even though we were older than you, we still felt orphaned and alone.

    I have 3 young children of my own, my baby was only 1 when I was diagnosed with breast cancer.

    Just know that your mom is still with you in spirit, watching out for you and still hoping for the best. Believe in yourself, and do her memory proud. And whether you believe it or not, I just bet there are other people around you who cheer you on and pray for you.

    If you ever feel lonely, or that no one understands, just come back here or email one of us. I've seen a lot of moms in here with children your age who can give you support and sound advice.

  • square
    square Member Posts: 3
    I am so sorry to read about your mommy. My mom died of breast cancer when I was 6 and my sister was 4. We did not understand what was happening because it was many years ago when the word cancer was something to be ashamed of. It is hard to be young and not have your mom around and only someone who has been through that can really understand. I hope you find someone you can get close to like an aunt or cousin because that will help you so much. There are going to be many times that will be difficult but I am sure you are very strong and will be able to get through them. And yes you are now at risk but just make sure you get those checkups and take good care of yourself. Please write me if I can help at all.
  • bridgett
    bridgett Member Posts: 3
    My daughter is 9 now and I was just diag. 12/16/02, and I am 28. I am sooo sorry about your mom, how old was she? I asked the doctor about my daughter and he said at 15 she needed to start doing self breast exams and getting checked once a year by a gynocologist. How this helped.
    God bless you sweetie