I want to share with you my emotions

JillGarcia
JillGarcia Member Posts: 3 Member
edited December 2023 in Liver Cancer #1

Hello everyone!

I want to share with you my story from getting diagnosed to living with liver cancer. My name is Jill Garcia I'm 38 yo. Mom of a boy and we are from Nevada. I am diagnosed with liver cancer in the beginning of 2022. It’s very hard to describe my emotions and loved ones when I was diagnosed… Of course we didn’t know any clinics, we would never have thought that this was waiting for one of us. We started reading a lots of articles and about cancer. As I remember my son found first symptoms somewhere [link removed by CSN]. In that moment I was sure I'll get diagnosed. Of course I try not to talk about cancer not to cause even more pain to my family but I know how much they care about me and maybe it's a big mistake. In june of 2022 I started my treatment which is still going on. It’s hard to say how I’m feeling now but I feel lonely all the time… I hope I’ll find a bit of support here I just want to share my emotions and just to talk. I know how imagination works and I understand how loved ones can think about things worse than they really are but I'm still afraid to make them constantly think about it. But the feeling of expecting something bad does not leave me. Autumn is my favourite season and I’m fighting to see it again! Do you share your emotions with your family?

Jill

Comments

  • 321
    321 Member Posts: 1 Member
    #2

    Hi Jill I also was diagnosed with liver cancer and feeling alone is just the beginning for me I'm afraid I'm presently on immunotherapy every 3weeks I just do t wanna be in pain and put my family thru unnecessary hurt although it's nothing I can do but take it one day at a time

  • Allenchipipa
    Allenchipipa Member Posts: 1 Member
    #3

    First experiences are hard to contain. My wife started chemo today for gallbladder cancer. I am so afraid. No counselling has been offered and am just speculating on my expectations. My worry is that she is already weak due to persistent vomiting. Am dead worried. Wish you well and God's divine healing during this awful journey.

  • iwanttoenjoylife
    iwanttoenjoylife Member Posts: 21 Member
    #4
    https://csn.cancer.org/discussion/325404/i-want-to-share-with-you-my-emotions

    I hid my feelings about my cancer and the treatment that made me sick, but now four years later I think it was a mistake. Be open and honest on how you feel emotionally and physically. Pretending you don’t have cancer does not work, I tried myself. You can always come here to express your feelings. Best of luck and prayers for you.

  • Meme1127
    Meme1127 Member Posts: 1 Member
    #5
    https://csn.cancer.org/discussion/325404/i-want-to-share-with-you-my-emotions

    Hi Jill I can relate I'm feeling alone also was diagnosed with liver cancer stage 4 metastasized to my lymph nodes in my stomach..I am currently on immunotherapy every 3 weeks I'm afraid of so many things I go for test on the first week of September to see if my treatment working I already have palliative care and hospice on standby

    I have so many emotions, mentally emotionally and physically seems nobody understands. I just turned 60 July 31st I was diagnosed with hepatitis C probably 20 years ago took harvoni was cleared (yaee) then in January diagnosed with cancer was in California doing travel nursing making good money then dr wouldn't renew b/p meds came home had some test cause my stomach always hurt never in my wildest had cancer entered my mind....I'm here if you ever wanna talk I'll send you my phone number...good luck to both of us and may God continue to bless and keep us.....Robin

  • Liver cancer
    Liver cancer Member Posts: 52 Member
    #6
    https://csn.cancer.org/discussion/325404/i-want-to-share-with-you-my-emotions

    I was diagnosed with liver cancer in March of 2002. Back then cancer was something to be ashamed of and I had 30 days to live with a 20% chance of survival. I didn’t tell anyone. Finally I told my friends and they all disappeared into the woodwork, didn’t want to see the end. All mad about the fact I could not wake up some day and they would be finding me. After I had a treatment that worked on my tumor I did tell my family. Lol, they went through stages of grief and I probably would tell them if I had to do it again, knock on wood. I fought my cancer for 18 years because I had an unremarkable liver except for a resilient tumor that was aggressive but contained with inferon. My NED was May 18, 2018. Since then I’ve had two bitty tumors that were easily treated and they didn’t change my NED. I’m four years survivor now and plan on living through my 80’s when I get there.

  • Liver cancer
    Liver cancer Member Posts: 52 Member
    #7

    I remember the shock of the first diagnosis. I was in shock and I don’t think I really understood what it meant. I’m a survivor, or will be in end of May when I hit my 5 year anniversary. I fought for 18 years. My doctors were always wondering why I didn’t talk about it and I tried to keep it “secret” but I was afraid that if I did let it out I would die because it was what happened to people who had liver cancer and I didn’t want to die. I wanted positive emotions around me. I’m cancer free and just had SS do their health investigation to make sure and I am coming up on the 5 year anniversary of NED in May 2023. I asked why they didn’t cut the bad part of my liver out, and I found out my cancer was inoperable with a blood vessel right there and my cancer had “roots” . Social Security calls people who are terminally ill “Teri” or they did when I was terminally ill. We aren’t supposed to know that, but when you have 30 days of life for 18 years…

  • mrsmurz
    mrsmurz Member Posts: 1 *
    #8

    Hi, new to site, just found out colon cancer metastasized to liver. Two tumors on 2.1cm and other 1.5, see Dr on Monday for treatment options. Day I finished chemo they found cancer dna in blood and since then been on hunt for cancer. Don’t understand how can grow when on chemo? Been Through so much already. Lost 3 feet of intestines and woke up with illiostomy bag. Have 15 yr old son although I’m 61. Lost feeling in hands and feet from Oxiplatin, a chemo I was given. Just scared and having rough time. Reading metastasized cancer is not curable! Trying to keep the faith! Best of luck to all of you! XO Jet

  • duke21
    duke21 Member Posts: 1 *
    #9

    hi i feel lonely too iwas diagnose this year as well

  • Holstein
    Holstein Member Posts: 4 *
    #10
    https://csn.cancer.org/discussion/comment/1698616#Comment_1698616

    I feel so sorry for you. I was diagnosed with liver cancer in 2022, and it is very hard. Can't work anymore (for now, at least, I am not giving up hope). Feeling helpless and alone, too, and father of twin boys. It's very hard. I pray for you that it will get better.

  • yazenA
    yazenA Member Posts: 2 *
    #11

    I join you all in prayers. Liver Cancer July 2023. started on the Stride protocol. First two months horrible but it shrunk one of the legions by 50%. I also have cihorssis of the liver caused by Hep C, which I do not have anymore. Just take my Immunotherapy every month and waiting on advancements. I almost wish I never found out about it. It is so depressing. I have 4 sons and a wife who is devastated. Nothing in terms of physical pains but deep depression and unable to eat well. I just feel lost at times. Take anti anxiety meds but it only works short time. Does anyone know of support groups?

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