Anoscopy tomorrow and I'm terrified

Wouldn't it be great if we could turn worry off as easily as it turns itself on? My grandpa used to say that having a good cry once in a while was a healthy thing and also makes the eyes sparkle...I suppose in some ways he was right and once the swelling and redness goes away it probably is a good way to naturally cleanse the eyes.

When I am in a state of anxiety, it seems every other little thing is so much worse than if I wasn't. I bet the change in driver plans for your appointment didn't help...sorry. Fortunately I have seldom had the need to rely on someone else for such, but when I do, I am always worried about a last minute goof-up so also have a plan B if needed.

My husband is very claustrophobic and needs to be sedated often, even for daily radiation treatments. (He has needed tests, scans, rads, for a blood cancer / tumor on his spine) While I or family usually do the driving he has at times had to set up a ride through various community programs or the ACS and we have dealt with several related needs to re-schedule or "B list" plans...it only makes a bad situation worse, I know!

Theres nothing wrong with a day in bed every so often during this journey, and sometimes the part of having cancer that effects us emotionally (and can't be radiated away) doesn't hit until after treatment is over and we are supposed to be in recovery mode. Hang in there... we're all with you on this.

Sending prayers for a good day tomorrow!

katheryn

I have days I stay in bed and cry for some reason I've been very emotional last week and this week. I told my friend that if I dropped my my Kleenex I'd cry. My birthday was the 30th and I bawled all day I would just find myself in tears. I finally let myself just have a good cry and that helped. This journey is stressful and add the fact that pert of the exam is a anoscopy really makes it stressful. I'll keep you in my thoughts and prayers. I hope to hear what happens. Best wishes

~ Kim

So glad to hear you made it through the exam and that after a bit of recovery time, you are feeling better.  I hope that the biopsy results will come back showing all is well.  Hopefully, you won't have to wait long to hear the results and everything will be fine.  Please keep us posted.

Hi Jane...so you did it!  It sounds like you had a tough time of it though, I'm sorry to hear that.  What's with the vomiting?  A reaction to the sedation, maybe?

It's good that your dr. sent a note home with you explaining why you were having the pain.  Biopsies will do that to you.  I'm sorry I can't help explain what he meant by "HPV Related Changes."  I'm only guessing, but he must have seen lesions or warts? No reason you can't call for a further explanation of what he meant by that.  You don't need to wait for the results of the biopsies to ask him.

 I'll be thinking of you...I still need to call to reschedule mine.  I'm waiting for my doc who did the back surgery to give me the all clear on Friday.  I'm almost hoping he tells me to wait a while, but I don't expect that he will.  That's just me, being chicken and wanting to procrastinate and postpone the inevitable.

Hugs,

Wis

Jane s said:

Wisteria

I'm thinking of you, too!  How is your back pain?  

Hi Jane,

My incision is healing well and the leg pain is nearly gone.  I'm optimistic that it will go completely and the foot tinglies will go too once all the swelling around that sciatic nerve go away.

I started physical therapy last week.  I am SO weak and out of shape.  Malnutrition sure didn't help me.  I'm still trying to gain weight.

My anoscopy is next week on the 21st and I'm dreading it.  I hope it's quick, painless and that she finds nothing!  

Thanks for thinking of me!

~W

I'm glad you made it through the exam okay and I hope you are now feeling better about everything.  May the doctor be able to answer your question about the lesions.  As I said above, I went through that and my doctor removed them so that they would not have a chance, no matter how remote, to progress to cancer.  The surgery was not that bad.  Best wishes!