Stage IV DNR form

mrou50
mrou50 Member Posts: 389 Member

Has any of the stage IV people filled out their DNR form (Do Not Resuscitate) yet. My doctor told me last week that even though I had good news it was time to get that filled out.  I filled it out today and took it in to the office to get signed and it was so surreal.  I have always known what the end results of this are going to be, baring a miracle cure, but after filling that out I was left numb and a little quiet, which for me is very rare being quiet that is. Just wondering if anyone else has done it yet and what they thought of when they did it.

 

Mark

Comments

  • Jan4you
    Jan4you Member Posts: 1,330 Member
    edited December 2016 #2
    I do feel for you, Mark. But

    I do feel for you, Mark. But did he mean, have you filled out and signed Power of Attorney for Healthcare or did he mean signing a paper and receiving a DNR bracelet? Unless you are wearing DNR bracelet, CPR will be done if your Power of Attorney for healthcare is not on file (or in computer) or provided to person doing CPR. 

    I can appreciate how this was too much of a "reality" test for you. Sobering to say the least. EVERYONE should do a Power of Attorney for Healthcare so your wishes are known. You approve of (3) "agents" who you know will carry out your wishes. So you need to ask him ahead of time.

    IN POA for healthcare, you check one of 3 boxes pertaining to DNR in Power of Attorney for Healthcare. (Paraphrasing):You can check I want CPR, (2)You are a DNR, (3) Yes, want CPR unless  a medical doctor determines you have an terminal illness and or/could not survive CPR

    Did you check the box for DNR no matter what?  And you are wearing a bracelet?

    Many get more injured and traumatized by the CPR (elderly especially) or are too sick to survive CPR.   But if you go into a hospital, or someone finds you unconscious, you need to be wearing a DNR bracelet or the paramedics will conduct CPR and you'll be on breathing machines.  

    Again, sobering. 

    I worked in hospice and saw family members insist on CPR on an already deceased elderly person. So family needs to be on board and you must be wearing a DNR bracelet.

    Hugs my dear Mark,

    Jan

  • mrou50
    mrou50 Member Posts: 389 Member
    Jan4you said:

    I do feel for you, Mark. But

    I do feel for you, Mark. But did he mean, have you filled out and signed Power of Attorney for Healthcare or did he mean signing a paper and receiving a DNR bracelet? Unless you are wearing DNR bracelet, CPR will be done if your Power of Attorney for healthcare is not on file (or in computer) or provided to person doing CPR. 

    I can appreciate how this was too much of a "reality" test for you. Sobering to say the least. EVERYONE should do a Power of Attorney for Healthcare so your wishes are known. You approve of (3) "agents" who you know will carry out your wishes. So you need to ask him ahead of time.

    IN POA for healthcare, you check one of 3 boxes pertaining to DNR in Power of Attorney for Healthcare. (Paraphrasing):You can check I want CPR, (2)You are a DNR, (3) Yes, want CPR unless  a medical doctor determines you have an terminal illness and or/could not survive CPR

    Did you check the box for DNR no matter what?  And you are wearing a bracelet?

    Many get more injured and traumatized by the CPR (elderly especially) or are too sick to survive CPR.   But if you go into a hospital, or someone finds you unconscious, you need to be wearing a DNR bracelet or the paramedics will conduct CPR and you'll be on breathing machines.  

    Again, sobering. 

    I worked in hospice and saw family members insist on CPR on an already deceased elderly person. So family needs to be on board and you must be wearing a DNR bracelet.

    Hugs my dear Mark,

    Jan

    Jan

    I already filled out the POA advanced directive he wanted the DNR.  We are supposed to keep it on the fridge, and take it with us when we travel.  He said I am in immediate danger of passing but it will happen and he said it is important to have everything in place.  We have got the life insurance covered the POA done, I still have to get a will put together and I am working on it now, and with the DNR I think I am almost prepared legally for all of the things I need.  I do say it makes me think and appreciate the time I have as well as my family and friends.

    Mark

  • Jan4you
    Jan4you Member Posts: 1,330 Member
    Not sure what you meant Mark.

    Not sure what you meant Mark. He said you ARE in immediate danger of passing or not?

    Anway... yes, sobering. Your SPIRIT will get you and your family through this time.

    I have witnessed amazing mental/emotional and spiritual changes at time of death..

    Hugs, Jan

  • mrou50
    mrou50 Member Posts: 389 Member
    Jan4you said:

    Not sure what you meant Mark.

    Not sure what you meant Mark. He said you ARE in immediate danger of passing or not?

    Anway... yes, sobering. Your SPIRIT will get you and your family through this time.

    I have witnessed amazing mental/emotional and spiritual changes at time of death..

    Hugs, Jan

    Ooops

    Sorry I am NOT in immediate danger, sorry that is a huge typo, glad my kids didn't see that.

    Mark

  • Allochka
    Allochka Member Posts: 1,074 Member
    Mark, I just want to say that

    Mark, I just want to say that you are extremely brave and strong person and that I admire you!

  • hardo718
    hardo718 Member Posts: 853 Member
    You're an inspiration

    Your Dr wants the DNR status for you?  That's ultimately your decision Mark, I hope he or she made that clear as well.  Having worked in the medical field, when I was asked by patients and/or families, as with my own family members, I gave my opinion and clarified the differences in the options and always mentioned it was ultimately their decision.  Frankly, I'm surprised this wasn't addressed with you sometime ago.  It's definitely something you want to have in order and your loved ones to be on board with, so when the time does come they will feel a sense of relief that they fullfilled your wishes.  Notihng worse than watching a family try to make those decisions for their beloved, especially when there's disagreement amongst them.

    God bless you Mark,

    Donna~

  • stub1969
    stub1969 Member Posts: 986 Member
    Whew!

    Glad you cleared that up, Mark.  I think it is important for all of us to be prepared whether we have or had cancer.  We've all seen where a young person is badly injured in an accident or other medical situation.  Having these things in order makes it a lot easier on our loved ones.  I'm gald you are responding to Cabo and I thank you for the little boost you gave me to get these things taken care of.

    Stub 

  • mrou50
    mrou50 Member Posts: 389 Member
    hardo718 said:

    You're an inspiration

    Your Dr wants the DNR status for you?  That's ultimately your decision Mark, I hope he or she made that clear as well.  Having worked in the medical field, when I was asked by patients and/or families, as with my own family members, I gave my opinion and clarified the differences in the options and always mentioned it was ultimately their decision.  Frankly, I'm surprised this wasn't addressed with you sometime ago.  It's definitely something you want to have in order and your loved ones to be on board with, so when the time does come they will feel a sense of relief that they fullfilled your wishes.  Notihng worse than watching a family try to make those decisions for their beloved, especially when there's disagreement amongst them.

    God bless you Mark,

    Donna~

    We did talk

    We chatted about all of this a couple of years ago when the dianosis occured and we would periodically revisit it.  Mostly it was about getting all of our affairs in the right order.  This was just the big one I was putting off.

    Mark

  • Jojo61
    Jojo61 Member Posts: 1,309 Member
    edited December 2016 #10
    I know it is a difficult

    I know it is a difficult subject. I remember when my mom decided to go DNR. I was heartbroken, but knew that under her circumstances, it was the best decision.

    It is always good to get our affairs in order, but not always an easy feat.

    Hugs

    Jojo

  • foxhd
    foxhd Member Posts: 3,181 Member
    I understand

    I'm ready to do mine also. For sure by next admission. But I am in no way ready to go yet. More like a part of business to take care of. Mark, we have been running a parallel course for a while. I think I understand.

  • Deanie0916
    Deanie0916 Member Posts: 628 Member
    edited December 2016 #12
    Thanks for your honesty

    when you share, I have drawn strength from your posts. My prayers are with you.

     

  • JerzyGrrl
    JerzyGrrl Member Posts: 760 Member
    edited December 2016 #13
    Do you live in the US?

    If you live in the US in one of the states that uses the POLST form, I'd encourage you to look into that.  It's not just "do-it-or-don't-it" but it has some intermediate items as well.  If you go to www.polst.org you can learn more.  Also the Five Wishes advance directive form has more options (but still is a statement of personal preference, not a physician's order).  AgingWithDignity.org gets you more info from them. 

    In the US, if you have a pre-hospital / out-of-hospital DNR order, the only way EMS will honor it without always having it with you is to register with the Medic Alert foundation (They will also file your Advance Directive for you). MedicAlert.org gets more info on them.  POLST is free, Five Wishes and Medic Alert being community benefit organizations will not turn anyone away due to an inability to pay. 

    Having said that, a family member with other life-threatening issues lived with an out-of-hospital / pre-hospital DNR order for 10 years.  Lived an active life for all those years. 

    Obviously, it's not over and we're not gone 'til it's over and we're gone. 

  • Ree_Maryland
    Ree_Maryland Member Posts: 161 Member
    edited December 2016 #14
    mrou50 said:

    Ooops

    Sorry I am NOT in immediate danger, sorry that is a huge typo, glad my kids didn't see that.

    Mark

    Whewww you scared me Mrou50,

    Whewww you scared me Mrou50, heres hoping and wishing all goes well for you ,