Hi teal sisters! Last several months have been rough

I haven't been on much lately but the last several months have been interesting to say the least. From what I read mom with 2 great kids and wolfmeister must be about where I am in my progression with this disease, only we all seem to have slightly different problems. I was doing pretty well till October and my ca125 went from about 100 to over 1000 almost over night.  At the time I was on topotecan. Because of the location of the nodes they decided to try 26 rounds of radiation.  Anyway I finished that and am now on gemsar. Don't care for it much, rough stuff. I have anywhere from 3 to 4 liters of ascites fluid drained every week. (Don't know how long that can go on). They sent the fluid away to see what would be most effective at this time. Stupid cancer cells died so they are doing it again.  They would like to do a new procedure called Y90 where they put radiation spheres in your liver for a new spot that has popped up.  Between kidney stones, bladder infections and good ole constipation it has been a rough couple months. Counts have dropped hundreds of points but the ascites continues.  Just getting really tired. How do you guys stay so positive with all the stuff they put us thru. Some days I don't know whether to fight or give up.  I think I am just getting tired of watching life pass me by.  I guess I just need some words of encouragement. Anyone found anything that seems to help?