Lower stage cancers and less aggressive treatments

LindaK. said:

Stage 2

MY husband was dx'd in Dec of 2012 and passed away 1week ago.  He followed every recommendation and treatment from the day of diagnosis until 9/22 when they said no more chemo.  He had had 4 colonoscopies from age 50 to 59 with some polyps but nothing cancerous or pre-cancerous.

Poor treatment and misread ct scan last December lead to 2 months of being treated for constipation when another large tumor was growing.  21 miserable days in the hospital in Jan.  Switched to new cancer center in March but outcome coud not be changed.  His original tumor was in colon, 2nd tumor in sm intestines and then spread to 2 distant lymph nodes, which ultimately caused his death.  I am still kind of numb about it and try not to dwell on the "what ifs" but the poor man suffered so and I can't get certain images out of my mind when I close my eyes.  I feel he wasted a whole year with poor medical management and it saddens me that he was treated like 'just another patient'

It just seems like such a waste.  I did not find too many others on this board that were stage 2 so I can't say how others fared.  All cancer makes me sad

Linda

I'm not saying that any stage can't progress but it's been the norm that lower stages tend to do better.  There are sometimes stages that can be given and because of a hidden cell can promote more cells to go elsewhere.  I'm sorry that your husband passed and that he went through so much. My prayers go to all everyday and thank you for continuing to be on the board.  Please don't take my post hurtful.  I'm only stating that most move on.  My love and heart goes out to you.

Kim

MaggieCat said:

If Only...

LindaK... My brother passed away in December, pancreatic cancer.  He was first diagnosed with prostate cancer and given treatment for that.  Did the cancer treatment professionals miss an earlier opportunity to focus on the real issue?  Maybe.  Sharing his daughter's words to me, arrived two days ago in the mail.  She was his right hand through the fight.  11 months on these are her words to me... and my words to you...

"you are going to be Okay.. Life is a walk that you take every day to learn all sorts of lessons along the way... the best thing to remember, come what may.....you are going to be okay"

Blessings to you Linda....

Maggie

I would tell my husband every night he was in the hospice facility that I would be OK even though I didn't feel anything was OK at that time.  I told him I loved him, I knew he loved me, thanked him for the time we had together and that he had done a great job as a husband father and grandfather and that it was OK to go.  He lasted 7 days in an unresponsive state.  It was difficult to watch and difficult to say those words to him over and over but I hope he heard me.

I will keep those words close to me.  I am kind of a loner and don't mind doing things alone, but now this is much different.  No more phone calls, no kisses goodnight, which makes me very sad.  We had such hope when they staged him at level 2 and convinced him to do the chemo for the best outcome.  It just wasn't meant to be. 

Thanks, Linda

Trubrit said:

Cyber hugs, Linda

You are in my thougts. Be good to yourself. We care!

Sue - Trubrit

JanJan63 said:

Linda, one thing I know for

Linda, one thing I know for sure is that he heard you and was comforted. Never doubt that. I've read enough data about that to know it's true that people in that state can hear everything around them. They do sleep sometimes but that would be the only time they wouldn't hear anything. And try not to beat yourself up about what could have been or what was missed. My mom passed in 1997 from pancreatic cancer and I knew she was sick a year before she passed. Her doctor kept blowing her off so I went to see him myself to ask him what was wrong with my mom. He told me she was just anxious. I still sometimes wake up from nightmares where I'm in a hospital running from person to person trying to tell them that my mom is sick and needs help and they're all ignoring me. I wake up with my face wet from tears and my heart pounding because I know she'll die.

I'm sorry you're still having those nightmares.  I fall asleep each night hoping to dream of my husband, but don't seem to have any dreams anymore. 

Linda