Ever get a song in your head?
and you can't get it out?
This weekend I had another experience that we have all had. Some good intentioned person was asking me how I'm doing. During our conversation they uttered that incredibly stupid statement, "We all could die any minute. We could get hit by a bus today. Or maybe have a heart attack and die. We are all in the same boat. You can't worry about it"..don't you want to punch them in the nose?..They are clueless.
I never had a good answer to that. They just don't understand how consuming the thought of having cancer is. Especially when you are stage 4. Then I asked him, "How many minutes in the last year have you conciously thought of dieing due to being hit by a bus?" Of course the answer was zero. Then I asked him," Now have you ever had a song (usually one you don't like) stuck in your head and you can't get it out no matter what you do?" Of course he said "Yes."
Then I told him THAT is what it is like to have cancer. All day. Every day. We never forget. We can get minutes, maybe hours where we can be distracted by family, activities, or sleep. But it never goes away. Constantly eating at your brain. That stopped him in his tracks. He exhaled and said he never considered that. My statement took all the air out of his balloon. He had no comeback. Here it was. Finally a snappy answer that people can understand.
Several people heard this conversation. I'm sure it struck them all. But me being me I decided to have fun with it. So what I did next was hilarious. (To me.) Here we were. At a picnic. 85 degrees. Middle of June.
So I started whistling. Christmas songs! I kept it up, off and on, all afternoon. Guess what everyone was doing after a while? Oh my God! It had me laughing my a$$ off. There was Jingle bells, White Christmas, and my favorite of the day was, "Grandma got run over by a reindeer..."
Now, is that funny or what? Maybe I drove the point home. I can't wait to do this again. Who says cancer can't be fun?
Comments
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I told one guy.. that he
I told one guy.. that he better be very careful... that "bus" is coming for him.. and that most likely I will outlive him.. That was fun for me.. scared the crap out of him.. for a little while anyway..
Yes people do not get it...
Song yes... the Motorcycle Song is in my head as well as a few others...
Be well my friend.!!
Ron
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Fox, that was perfect! And soGSRon said:I told one guy.. that he
I told one guy.. that he better be very careful... that "bus" is coming for him.. and that most likely I will outlive him.. That was fun for me.. scared the crap out of him.. for a little while anyway..
Yes people do not get it...
Song yes... the Motorcycle Song is in my head as well as a few others...
Be well my friend.!!
Ron
Fox, that was perfect! And so incredibly true.
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Hit the nail on the head
My wife wonders why I can't sleep in most of the time. I don't want to tell her that I wake up thinking about how long I might have left. Most of the time I can pretend it isn't there, but it's always in the back of my mind. Even short term plans become very iffy. To my family I seem like I am in good health, but with another week or two of IL-2 looming we can pretty much write off August and September.
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Nail on the headthaxter said:Hit the nail on the head
My wife wonders why I can't sleep in most of the time. I don't want to tell her that I wake up thinking about how long I might have left. Most of the time I can pretend it isn't there, but it's always in the back of my mind. Even short term plans become very iffy. To my family I seem like I am in good health, but with another week or two of IL-2 looming we can pretty much write off August and September.
I really think when people we love start with the " you could hit by a bus" or " I'm sure the scan will be fine" mean well and really are just hoping we will be ok. I am trying not to get pissed off at this anymore
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Love the analogy!
I love that analogy Fox! You do make me laugh! We all know what you mean though, I hate those flippant comments, shows a complete lack of empathy. I have lost count of how many times I have been told "well we all have to go some time". Well! that's true but we don't all walk around with a packed suitcase at the ready. There is no way we are all in the same boat, this one has definitely sprung a major leak taking a concentrated effort to keep it afloat.
Keep whistling:)
Djinnie x
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Mavelous! Thanks for the grin
I will have to use that one this weekend. The frakin' bus comment is very popular and I will be around family who like to use it 8-).
As for songs...I had a Backstreet Boys song that I only knew about 4 words too stuck in my head during my first marathon YEARS ago. 26.2 miles of, "Don't want you back..."! 8-) (now I don't listen to radio before long races - only the music from Band of Brothers)
Do you have a "tackful" turn turn down for, "Show me your scar", that I can use this weekend as well?
Have a grand day! You made mine
Laurie
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Show me your scar....aamdsi said:Mavelous! Thanks for the grin
I will have to use that one this weekend. The frakin' bus comment is very popular and I will be around family who like to use it 8-).
As for songs...I had a Backstreet Boys song that I only knew about 4 words too stuck in my head during my first marathon YEARS ago. 26.2 miles of, "Don't want you back..."! 8-) (now I don't listen to radio before long races - only the music from Band of Brothers)
Do you have a "tackful" turn turn down for, "Show me your scar", that I can use this weekend as well?
Have a grand day! You made mine
Laurie
Laurie, I was at a large biker party a couple months after my nephrectomy. My 7-8" incision was still red and a bit inflammed. As you would expect, there were plenty of loud obnoxious drunk bikers hasseling people. As I walked by with a couple friends one loud mouth started on us. He was saying things like, "Your not a real biker, if you were you'd have a limp." and so on. Well he made a mistake because then he asked, "Where"s your scars? You'd have some if you were a real biker." So I turned to him and raised my shirt. Now he goes, "You call that a scar? This is a scar." And he raised his shirt. He had plenty of big scars. Then with all his friends waiting for a response, I said loudly, "At least mine wasn't from a hysterectomy!" I thought either I get stabbed or I get away with it. Anyway his buddies started laughing at him so hard I thought they'd fall over and wet their pants laughing. Score me-1, jerk-0. Hey, when in Rome....
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snort 8-)foxhd said:Show me your scar....
Laurie, I was at a large biker party a couple months after my nephrectomy. My 7-8" incision was still red and a bit inflammed. As you would expect, there were plenty of loud obnoxious drunk bikers hasseling people. As I walked by with a couple friends one loud mouth started on us. He was saying things like, "Your not a real biker, if you were you'd have a limp." and so on. Well he made a mistake because then he asked, "Where"s your scars? You'd have some if you were a real biker." So I turned to him and raised my shirt. Now he goes, "You call that a scar? This is a scar." And he raised his shirt. He had plenty of big scars. Then with all his friends waiting for a response, I said loudly, "At least mine wasn't from a hysterectomy!" I thought either I get stabbed or I get away with it. Anyway his buddies started laughing at him so hard I thought they'd fall over and wet their pants laughing. Score me-1, jerk-0. Hey, when in Rome....
Glad you lived after THAT 8-)
Now back to humming, "deck the halls"......
sheesh and maybe I'll learn how to spell - tactful 8-)
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APny said:
LOL, you're very funny! Not
LOL, you're very funny! Not to mention very brave
Fox,
I love your attitude and wit. Then again "wit" sounds too wimpy for a biker. You're hilarious. I'll have to remember that analogy. It's perfect.
About that last song, there a lot of deer where I live and I'll see one a couple of times a week. One day walking back from my mailbox, I saw something blow past me in a dead run, close enough to feel the breeze. I saw the tail as it flew through the bushes. I think of that song every time the incident comes to mind. I may not get run over by a bus, but a deer could take me out.
What I admire is your spirit and ability to live fully in spite of the nagging cancer song.
Kathy
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Wouldn't it be funnyNewDay said:Fox,
I love your attitude and wit. Then again "wit" sounds too wimpy for a biker. You're hilarious. I'll have to remember that analogy. It's perfect.
About that last song, there a lot of deer where I live and I'll see one a couple of times a week. One day walking back from my mailbox, I saw something blow past me in a dead run, close enough to feel the breeze. I saw the tail as it flew through the bushes. I think of that song every time the incident comes to mind. I may not get run over by a bus, but a deer could take me out.
What I admire is your spirit and ability to live fully in spite of the nagging cancer song.
Kathy
if we had a choosen tune. And when we were around other people, we whistled or hummed it. A happy tune for positivity. I think that is why a xmas tune is great. Do it discreatly. Then watch how many people we can get to sing or hum or whistle it. No harm done. Spread the joy. Watch other people get something in their head that they can't get out. but don't ever tell them. Otherwise, you could never get away with it again. This game would be funnier the longer you have had cancer. I think.
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The Whole Wide World is Whistling!foxhd said:Wouldn't it be funny
if we had a choosen tune. And when we were around other people, we whistled or hummed it. A happy tune for positivity. I think that is why a xmas tune is great. Do it discreatly. Then watch how many people we can get to sing or hum or whistle it. No harm done. Spread the joy. Watch other people get something in their head that they can't get out. but don't ever tell them. Otherwise, you could never get away with it again. This game would be funnier the longer you have had cancer. I think.
Nice idea Fox, the world could do with some cheering up, big time! I am always whistling 'Pumpin Blood' by NoNoNo, you know the one that goes 'The whole wide world is whistling'. It really gets me dancing around the kitchen in the mornings. I play it several times a day, my other half tells me he is sick of hearing it. Funny! You can hear him whistling it when he is out in the garden though!
You are such a card:)
Djinnie xx
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Happy tune good, but not happy by Pharrellfoxhd said:Wouldn't it be funny
if we had a choosen tune. And when we were around other people, we whistled or hummed it. A happy tune for positivity. I think that is why a xmas tune is great. Do it discreatly. Then watch how many people we can get to sing or hum or whistle it. No harm done. Spread the joy. Watch other people get something in their head that they can't get out. but don't ever tell them. Otherwise, you could never get away with it again. This game would be funnier the longer you have had cancer. I think.
I hate that song.
Given the temps today in the east....how about Bruce Springsteen's "Girls in their summer clothes", though if you listen to the song, (like many from the boss), you will find that the cheerfull melody goes with wistfully sad lyrics.
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Fox, you rock!
You handled that situation so well. You drove the point home! I have, in fact, been told MANY times about that bus. Now I will try and use your solution! I think you need to be our official bus driver!!- whistling that tune!
And that biker with the scar thing? Priceless. And dangerous!! Wow.
Thanks for starting my day with such a great chuckle!
Hugs and SMILES
Jojo
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...It's beginning to look alotJojo61 said:Fox, you rock!
You handled that situation so well. You drove the point home! I have, in fact, been told MANY times about that bus. Now I will try and use your solution! I think you need to be our official bus driver!!- whistling that tune!
And that biker with the scar thing? Priceless. And dangerous!! Wow.
Thanks for starting my day with such a great chuckle!
Hugs and SMILES
Jojo
like Christmas.....everywhere we go.....o,o,oo,oo,o,oooo, everywhere we go.....Hee, hee, hee.. I'm gonna stick to that tune. it's kind of contagious.
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foxhd said:
...It's beginning to look alot
like Christmas.....everywhere we go.....o,o,oo,oo,o,oooo, everywhere we go.....Hee, hee, hee.. I'm gonna stick to that tune. it's kind of contagious.
- "This is the song that doesn't end
- Yes, it goes on and on my friend
- Some people started singing it not knowing what it was,
- And they'll continue singing it forever just because . . ."
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Awesome!
And thank you for sharing! I hear this all the time when people find out my huz has stage IV RCC. I'm sure they are trying to make him feel better in knowing that we all have an expiration date. Of course it doesn't make him feel better! As he says, his "expiration date" just always seems that much closer. AND is ALWAYS present in his thoughts.
Thanks again for sharing. I'm going to forward this to him. He's been in and out of the hospital so much this last month and he's feeling extremely frustrated especially as he has not been able to straddle his hog and feels he never will again.
Im hoping he will join this group and find just a bit of comfort among those who try get it!
Hugs,
Jenny
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Hmm... just rememberedjshorty29 said:Awesome!
And thank you for sharing! I hear this all the time when people find out my huz has stage IV RCC. I'm sure they are trying to make him feel better in knowing that we all have an expiration date. Of course it doesn't make him feel better! As he says, his "expiration date" just always seems that much closer. AND is ALWAYS present in his thoughts.
Thanks again for sharing. I'm going to forward this to him. He's been in and out of the hospital so much this last month and he's feeling extremely frustrated especially as he has not been able to straddle his hog and feels he never will again.
Im hoping he will join this group and find just a bit of comfort among those who try get it!
Hugs,
Jenny
Hmm... just remembered (somewhat) the movie of Apollo 13... when things looked really bad, you heard the sound of "Oh say can you see.." Not sure if that part really happened but singing in the face of adversity.. awesome..!
Ron
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I think I love you
Oh. My. Goodness. Fox! This was the best thing I've read on here, to date!
After reading it and the other. about your exchange with the bully biker, the song "I think I love you" by the Partridge Family (of all people) popped in my head. You really are something else! I have always liked you but now, I think I love you!! And now, not only is the song stuck in my head but, I'll think of you everytime I hear it. I'd say thanks for making me laugh but, with these 17 staples in my belly, laughter is not the best medicine at the moment. Still, I very much enjoyed reading thru this thread!
xoxo
Sindy
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