Just having a hard time right now

I wish could do something to make it even a little better.  Even if just sending you a virtual hug.

41 years!  Wow, that is so wonderful!  Many congrats to you both.

Will pray for answeds to come soon and that you are out playing in the dirt soon

I am sorry that you are having a rough time.  I will be praying for you.  Keep fixing your hair and putting on your makeup,  lol.  My wife asked me this morning how I motivated myself each day to get going.   I told her that I swing my feet off the bed, stand up and put my right foot in front of my left foot.   God takes care of the rest of the day!

Keep stepping foward, we are praying for your health to improve. 

Sincerely, 

Bellweather

I completely get the hair and makeup thing. Good for you! We all fight back the best we can. I know I feel SO MUCH better when I climb out of P.j.s or whatever shmata I tend to wear when housebound. Freshly washed and styled hair and a dab of makeup, maybe a choice piece of jewelry and a cute outfit are armor . It's like wearing a smile. Force yourself to smile and eventually you will actually feel better. At least uplifted. Dressing to meet the day, best foot forward - especially when you are feeling lousy and battered - is a smart tactic. Sometimes it's the only thing we can do that day to help ourselves. Your instincts are right on.

I'm sorry you can't talk to members of your family. Do you have a friend or even distant relative tou can unload with? Stifling your emotions can lead to exhaustion -emotional exhaustion. Bottom line, this all sucks. There, I've said it. I pray this truth will set you free. Hang in there.

Sending prayers and good thoughts your way Brea!  Wish I could hand you the Bud Light and then ask you for a gardening lesson! Congratulations on your 41st Anniversary, that is quite an accomplishment for you both to be proud of. I know what its like not being able to talk to anyone I wish I knew how to fix that!  I'll say some prayers about that too!!

danbren2 said:

Always Here!

Brea,

     So sorry about the way you are feeling! I do like the fight in you, and doing hair and makeup everyday is a form of fighting.  I also love this sight; the people on here have helped me so much.  There is one thing that I do that has also helped me alot and that is to write down what I am feeling.  The day that I am writing down the bad days are not very good, but going back now and reading what I wrote last year and how I was feeling compared to the way I feel now is just amazing.  I know this doesn't work for everyone but a dear friend gave me a small notebook with pen and a card that said "write it" and that's what I have been doing and it really helps! 

     Sending good karma and prayers!

                                                        Brenda

many of us are thinking of you and hope that there can be an UP in your merry-go-round ride.  Even when you're too pooped to get on the horse, you can still sit in the Ducky Boat and enjoy the sunshine and the view.

You can still garden in the house.  Toothpicks in an avacado pit on the window sill; cut the green top and a bit of carrot off and put it in water; plant some pea seeds and watch them sprout.  Or if you like, have container gardens on the deck.  Enjoy what you CAN do instead of worrying about what you feel you aren't able to do right now.

Hang in there, Brea.  We care.

Donna

First of all, congrats on 41 years!  You deserve a six pack of bud light!! 

Hang in there, Brea!  You sound like you're pretty tough, a real fighter!   I think putting pen to paper as Brenda suggested, is an excellent idea.  Writing takes almost no energy and can be so therapeutic and, it helps pass the time.  It's easy to get lost in your thoughts when you're writting.    Keep thinking about the future and the flowers you will plant when you are up to it.

I think sometimes people just don't know what to say to someone who's sick, so they say nothing at all.  I talk to you all about my health issues way more than I talk to my family.  It's more comforting to me to talk to people who can relate to what I am going thru.  I don't have COPD and don't pretend to know what you are dealing with, but all of us here have at least one thing in common. 

I hope you'll keep us posted on how your upcoming tests and scans go.  Hoping you get answers soon!

I will lift you in prayer, my friend!

Sindy

I’m so sorry you’re going through all this but honestly, with having had pneumonia since April, difficulty breathing and probably not getting enough oxygen, then a painful hip, and facing all those upcoming scans, it’s completely understandable that you are feeling rough and run down. You ARE run down. Plus you still need the narcotic painkillers and those will definitely contribute to feeling depressed as they’re a CNS depressant. I think it’s great that you’re making efforts to look good because they do say “fake it till you make it” so that should help lifting your spirits. That and hopefully some good news with your scans.

Congratulations on your 41^st!

I am alive said:

We all have those

We all have those crash-and-burn days....or hours. But, like you, we manage to climb out of the pit and carry on. Some climbs are faster than others.

When I was first diagnosed a women who I didn't even know, who battled her own RCC, told me to "stay in the light." Literally and metaphorically.It was the best advice I got in those early frightening days. She told me to sit by a window (which I do in the doctor's office especially, all the time) go outside, turn on a lamp. Watch comedies. Laugh. Schedule time with friends who make you feel good. And stay away from folks who don't make you feel good. Listen to upbeat music. Dance (by yourself - go ahead!). Connect with your spirituality. Maybe that connection can be made by visiting a spring garden in bloom, or just getting quiet and meditating on a chair in the backyard. Whatever works for you. I have found that this "light" is all around us, all the time. We just need to access it. And it really does help lighten the mood, the vibe, and your general outlook. 

On another note, you said you you love to garden but are not up for the bending and reaching involved. A person on another cancer site suggested gardening by chair, using tall pots in which to plant flowers, veggies and/or herbs. And I thought that was pretty cool. Seeing those babies bloom and surrounding yourself with their beauty would be light-enhancing, don't you think?

 

Oh, and here's a Zen Buddhist take on cancer that I like. Zen thinking suggests that instead of grasping onto life in a delusion of some sense of control, we live it with an open hand. Go with the flow, in others words.

Here's the take we can apply to living with cancer: Do what is necessary in the moment. Each moment. Evrey moment. Moment after moment. It's all good.

 

I don't know. I find some kind of peace in that. Is pain and suffering good? Who knows what this life is all about? No, of course it's not "good." But I can't see the bigger picture from here.

When you are down, do things that make you happy. It's not easy living with rcc and having other health issues as well. It's so nice that we can come on this site and vent our troubles to the people who really understand. I always feel so much better when I post on here and get lovely replies. Hope you are feeling much better today. ((Hugs))

Karen