had or have - whats your view
Comments
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That is something i am
That is something i am really struggling with right now. I am totally into positive thoughts. I think it makes a real difference but i also have to consider that i have had 2 recurrences after long periods of NED. The problem is we just dont know.0 -
Excellent question! I WANTjanderson1964 said:That is something i am
That is something i am really struggling with right now. I am totally into positive thoughts. I think it makes a real difference but i also have to consider that i have had 2 recurrences after long periods of NED. The problem is we just dont know.
Excellent question! I WANT to say had but am afraid to jinx things! I am sitting in MD Anderson waiting for my Halloween scans right now. Wish me luck! Lorikat0 -
your scansLorikat said:Excellent question! I WANT
Excellent question! I WANT to say had but am afraid to jinx things! I am sitting in MD Anderson waiting for my Halloween scans right now. Wish me luck! Lorikat
I hope the results of your scans are a real Halloween TREAT!!!!
u r in my thoughts and prayers0 -
had, have...
I had cancer in 1989.
had radiation therapy and it was "gone"
so, I HAD NO Cancer from 1990 to November 2011.
but, did i really have NO cancer?
in 2011 the doctors told me that the radiation treatments from 1989, caused such a scorching of my colon, that it caused the cancer to grow... and that most likely it had been growing from the outside of my colon, to the inside and to the liver... for anywhere from 5 to 10 years. So, did I HAVE cacner then? yes.
But, i still refer to when i KNEW i HAD cancer.
and, I often i hear myself saying... "when i got sick" instead of saying.... when i found out i got cancer.
so... with all that said... the day I hear that I'm NED... is the day i say.... I HAD cancer and I beat the sh@t out of it!!!!
so... you HAD cancer!!!!!
check out this site I found this week: http://www.ihadcancer.com/
many blessings for continued success and keeping that beast away!!!
hugs
Joe0 -
Different Perches - Different Viewpoints
I think if you are fortunate to have it happen once and then start putting many, many miles behind you...one could say they "had cancer."
For those of us who have met Mr. Recurrence...well, it's quite a different mindset.
I've done cancer 3x in the past eight years...when you're first starting out, we all think the same thing...I'm gonna' do the surgery...I'm gonna' do some chemo...and then I'll have a nice story to tell everyone.
But, Recurrence changes all of that...I was surprised at first, but I always felt that we should truly expect a recurrence..."One and Done" does happen to some folks, but the vast majority of us will recur at some point.
And then you think, well, I'll get this one too...
And then, like me, you get the 3rd one...and a new reality begins to set in...now, the doubts become amplified - ringing in your ears...you understand at that point, what adversary you are truly up against.
I defeated my cancer for the 3rd time last year...clear now, watching and waiting...
At some point, I do expect cancer to find me again for #4...at that point, I'll probably have a few more thoughts...because the picture will be even clearer for me than it is right now talking to you.
Right now, I'd say, "I have cancer - but its in a dormant state..."
In the future, if I stay clear, I might say, "I had cancer."
I hope to achieve that milestone.
An interesting question...and as always, the view differs depending on which side of the pasture you're standing in...
Take care.
-Craig0 -
Cancer Status
This is kind of funny you posted this today. I just had a co-worker ask me if I remembered when I had cancer? Hmmmmmm. When people ask me I always say I don't have any visible cancer, because I am not completely sure how accurate any of the scans or blood tests are these days. But I think there are many people out there that have cancer and it is lying low so they don't know it yet and maybe it will never rear it's ugly head. Sometimes I think I was one of the lucky ones that found out I have it so I can fight it and maybe live my life better. It has taught me to stop and take time to appreciate the important things in life. There have been several positives that have come out of the last 15 months of my journey. But either way, I have never let cancer consume my life. Except for the appointments, surgeries, and hospital stays I have lived my life normally. I won't let cancer take any more of my time then it already has taken. I don't label myself a cancer fighter or cancer survivor. I am me and I had to go through treatment for an illness but cancer does not define me.0 -
had
I am 11 year colorectal cancer survivor. I had my colon removed 11 years ago with stage 2-3 cancer. I am healthy and live a normal life. So it can be beat. My cancer had moved to my adrenals, but did some chemo, and have been good since.0 -
Double Hhealthyandhappy said:had
I am 11 year colorectal cancer survivor. I had my colon removed 11 years ago with stage 2-3 cancer. I am healthy and live a normal life. So it can be beat. My cancer had moved to my adrenals, but did some chemo, and have been good since.
Welcome...and congrats on the 11-years:)0 -
I agree with CraigSundanceh said:Different Perches - Different Viewpoints
I think if you are fortunate to have it happen once and then start putting many, many miles behind you...one could say they "had cancer."
For those of us who have met Mr. Recurrence...well, it's quite a different mindset.
I've done cancer 3x in the past eight years...when you're first starting out, we all think the same thing...I'm gonna' do the surgery...I'm gonna' do some chemo...and then I'll have a nice story to tell everyone.
But, Recurrence changes all of that...I was surprised at first, but I always felt that we should truly expect a recurrence..."One and Done" does happen to some folks, but the vast majority of us will recur at some point.
And then you think, well, I'll get this one too...
And then, like me, you get the 3rd one...and a new reality begins to set in...now, the doubts become amplified - ringing in your ears...you understand at that point, what adversary you are truly up against.
I defeated my cancer for the 3rd time last year...clear now, watching and waiting...
At some point, I do expect cancer to find me again for #4...at that point, I'll probably have a few more thoughts...because the picture will be even clearer for me than it is right now talking to you.
Right now, I'd say, "I have cancer - but its in a dormant state..."
In the future, if I stay clear, I might say, "I had cancer."
I hope to achieve that milestone.
An interesting question...and as always, the view differs depending on which side of the pasture you're standing in...
Take care.
-Craig
After my initial diagnosis, I went through surgery, chemo and radiation and clean scans for 2 and a half years and so considered myself as having had cancer. After my recent recurrence, my mindset is now "I have cancer but its in a dormant state" as Craig said. I think one's length of NED status and incidents of recurrence make a difference. Best of health to those who have and had cancer.0 -
Makes sense to view as someSundanceh said:Double H
Welcome...and congrats on the 11-years:)
Makes sense to view as some of you said - "have" when still in treatment - "had" if NED and being followed. Still interesting how other entities will now always classify you as having cancer. I tried to get aflac about a year ago but was denied due to my dx.0 -
Only recently, at 5 years
Only recently, at 5 years out, have I started to say "I had cancer" but I feel funny saying that. Somehow, I wonder if it is still lurking, and when it will rear its ugly head yet again.
Re. Insurance, I got long-term insurance at about 3 years out. By 5 years clear, you should be able to get AFLAC. It depends on the insurer. One regarded me as clear, another wouldn't accept me (got hung up on "Stage IV").0 -
haveabrub said:Only recently, at 5 years
Only recently, at 5 years out, have I started to say "I had cancer" but I feel funny saying that. Somehow, I wonder if it is still lurking, and when it will rear its ugly head yet again.
Re. Insurance, I got long-term insurance at about 3 years out. By 5 years clear, you should be able to get AFLAC. It depends on the insurer. One regarded me as clear, another wouldn't accept me (got hung up on "Stage IV").
for me for absolute sure have.......
seven years ....3 reoccurs....oh no....have.....but not really ....just not today...
I would be very surprised if I ever reached had status....
that's how I deal with it...head down ...quietly thinking good things.....what a strange disease
mags0 -
I find myself saying beforejoemetz said:had, have...
I had cancer in 1989.
had radiation therapy and it was "gone"
so, I HAD NO Cancer from 1990 to November 2011.
but, did i really have NO cancer?
in 2011 the doctors told me that the radiation treatments from 1989, caused such a scorching of my colon, that it caused the cancer to grow... and that most likely it had been growing from the outside of my colon, to the inside and to the liver... for anywhere from 5 to 10 years. So, did I HAVE cacner then? yes.
But, i still refer to when i KNEW i HAD cancer.
and, I often i hear myself saying... "when i got sick" instead of saying.... when i found out i got cancer.
so... with all that said... the day I hear that I'm NED... is the day i say.... I HAD cancer and I beat the sh@t out of it!!!!
so... you HAD cancer!!!!!
check out this site I found this week: http://www.ihadcancer.com/
many blessings for continued success and keeping that beast away!!!
hugs
Joe
I find myself saying before I got sick, or when I got sick. I have wondered before if that is a sign of being in denial but Im not in denial.
Cindy0 -
The first occurrence ofmaglets said:have
for me for absolute sure have.......
seven years ....3 reoccurs....oh no....have.....but not really ....just not today...
I would be very surprised if I ever reached had status....
that's how I deal with it...head down ...quietly thinking good things.....what a strange disease
mags
The first occurrence of cancer, after I my second surgery, I said I had cancer. Two years later and round two, I have cancer. Now 2 years again, I have Cancer.
It is all perspective and how sever was your first cancer? We thought my first cancer was not a big deal, and a little life scare. At round two we realized this is a life changing event and better take it a lot more serious. All about perspective.
Does it go away, or do we have a higher propensity for cancer? Are we the Human Canaries? Is our food and water so polluted that society is going to see more cancer in the future?
Best Always, mike0 -
Wrong Terminology
I do not think there is an official definition from a recognised cancer authority that uses "NED". IMO, I believe it is only used by some cancer patients who have been assessed as being currently in remission. NED seems to be replacing the term "remission", but means essentially the same thing. So to answer your question, "we have cancer".0 -
My wish
My biggest wish and desire is to say those words "I had cancer."
Those words will never be on my lips, though in vain I wish they could.
Once you are stage I'V. You are always waiting for that next shoe to drop. For me it has.
Now I simply wish to continue life as long as I can, do I hope that it is many years from now? H@ll yes!
But for the last 2 and a half years, it is yes, I have cancer, but may that day come when, we all are able to say those magical words: "I HAD cancer"!
And to those that can say it now, we congratulate you whole heartedly and look forward to being amongst you at some point and time!
Winter Marie0 -
Stage IV's and Metastatic Stage IV's....herdizziness said:My wish
My biggest wish and desire is to say those words "I had cancer."
Those words will never be on my lips, though in vain I wish they could.
Once you are stage I'V. You are always waiting for that next shoe to drop. For me it has.
Now I simply wish to continue life as long as I can, do I hope that it is many years from now? H@ll yes!
But for the last 2 and a half years, it is yes, I have cancer, but may that day come when, we all are able to say those magical words: "I HAD cancer"!
And to those that can say it now, we congratulate you whole heartedly and look forward to being amongst you at some point and time!
Winter Marie
...each of these trails leads directly to the path of progression...like meandering tributaries towards the same great river...and with it, an uncertainty that is very hard to shake...
Recurrence changes everything...
Multiple recurrences take it to an even higher level of competition...and redefines the definition of cancer in ways you can only imagine...
...until you find yourself there and can begin to grasp the weight of the gravity that surrounds you.
From there, you reach Awareness...and with even more time...Enlightenment...and you might find that your definition of "Have or Had" will be constantly redefined with each passing recurrence, should you draw that card.
I don't think we have to look any farther than Steved...he fought his battle...went 7-years clear...and you know the rest of the story...we're all riding along.
It's five years right off the top...with clean scans...that's medical NED
But as Steve's story tells us...even after 7-years, it can come again...
So, will we ever be really free?
It's all in what you believe, I guess...I still don't have the answer yet...probably won't.
I think sometimes we tell ourselves whatever we need to get us through it - but, is it the truth - or just the truth we want to see?
And does it really matter as long as it works for us?
In the end, all that any of us can really do is just get up everyday and do the tasks we need to do...until we can no longer do them...is there really anything else in this life?
We go until we can't...cancer or no cancer...had or have...
One of the beautiful aspects of the cancer journey is to be able to see what your viewpoints are at this fork in the road...and whether over time, your stance will soften or remain steadfast.
And of course, they are so individual...and that's what makes all the perspectives so unique and special.
I just want to say thank you all for sharing.
-Craig0 -
A beautifully written responseSundanceh said:Stage IV's and Metastatic Stage IV's....
...each of these trails leads directly to the path of progression...like meandering tributaries towards the same great river...and with it, an uncertainty that is very hard to shake...
Recurrence changes everything...
Multiple recurrences take it to an even higher level of competition...and redefines the definition of cancer in ways you can only imagine...
...until you find yourself there and can begin to grasp the weight of the gravity that surrounds you.
From there, you reach Awareness...and with even more time...Enlightenment...and you might find that your definition of "Have or Had" will be constantly redefined with each passing recurrence, should you draw that card.
I don't think we have to look any farther than Steved...he fought his battle...went 7-years clear...and you know the rest of the story...we're all riding along.
It's five years right off the top...with clean scans...that's medical NED
But as Steve's story tells us...even after 7-years, it can come again...
So, will we ever be really free?
It's all in what you believe, I guess...I still don't have the answer yet...probably won't.
I think sometimes we tell ourselves whatever we need to get us through it - but, is it the truth - or just the truth we want to see?
And does it really matter as long as it works for us?
In the end, all that any of us can really do is just get up everyday and do the tasks we need to do...until we can no longer do them...is there really anything else in this life?
We go until we can't...cancer or no cancer...had or have...
One of the beautiful aspects of the cancer journey is to be able to see what your viewpoints are at this fork in the road...and whether over time, your stance will soften or remain steadfast.
And of course, they are so individual...and that's what makes all the perspectives so unique and special.
I just want to say thank you all for sharing.
-Craig
Thank you for sharing, Craig.0 -
Well said Craig.Sundanceh said:Stage IV's and Metastatic Stage IV's....
...each of these trails leads directly to the path of progression...like meandering tributaries towards the same great river...and with it, an uncertainty that is very hard to shake...
Recurrence changes everything...
Multiple recurrences take it to an even higher level of competition...and redefines the definition of cancer in ways you can only imagine...
...until you find yourself there and can begin to grasp the weight of the gravity that surrounds you.
From there, you reach Awareness...and with even more time...Enlightenment...and you might find that your definition of "Have or Had" will be constantly redefined with each passing recurrence, should you draw that card.
I don't think we have to look any farther than Steved...he fought his battle...went 7-years clear...and you know the rest of the story...we're all riding along.
It's five years right off the top...with clean scans...that's medical NED
But as Steve's story tells us...even after 7-years, it can come again...
So, will we ever be really free?
It's all in what you believe, I guess...I still don't have the answer yet...probably won't.
I think sometimes we tell ourselves whatever we need to get us through it - but, is it the truth - or just the truth we want to see?
And does it really matter as long as it works for us?
In the end, all that any of us can really do is just get up everyday and do the tasks we need to do...until we can no longer do them...is there really anything else in this life?
We go until we can't...cancer or no cancer...had or have...
One of the beautiful aspects of the cancer journey is to be able to see what your viewpoints are at this fork in the road...and whether over time, your stance will soften or remain steadfast.
And of course, they are so individual...and that's what makes all the perspectives so unique and special.
I just want to say thank you all for sharing.
-Craig
Well said Craig.0
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