Two cancers in one breast.....overwhelmed and scared.
..'atypical'.....hollow core needle biopsy 4 days later....again pathology 'atypical'.....lumpectomy 2 days later.....pathology 'atypical' showing invasive cancer on one side of the perimeter tissue and non-invasive in situ on the other. My surgeon wanted to 'take a little more tissue and a couple of lymph nodes" to finish the staging and told me I'd have to have chemo and radiation. I said no. I want the entire breast removed....both if they'll take them. My oncologist is kind and says if I want 'em gone, I should be able to get 'em gone. He called the surgeon who agreed to take the one, which is happening this Thursday. No one but a kind sister on this website has given me any information on what to expect from having the masectomy. (Thank you Cinnamon...I went and got zip and button front gowns today). I'll be off work for 6 weeks...but other than that, I'm clueless. I'm not letting many know, but I'm really frightened. I have good moments....and I joke a lot (getting eyes tattooed on the back of my head if I lose my hair...always told my kids they were there, might as well have 'em)...
to crying my heart out. I'm not scared of surgery...I've had a ton. No thyroid, c-section, doctor blew my colon during a colonoscopy and didn't find it for a day so I went septic...and even more. But....my son, daughter-in-law, and 4 grandkids live 900 miles away and I don't want to be without them. Selfish to a degree.....but I want them here nonetheless. I cry just thinking of them. There is no cancer in my family. This came out of the blue. I know there is a purpose behind everything that happens in life....and I know I'll figure out what this one is sooner or later, but right now I want to curl up in a ball and sleep...and sleep....and sleep. Thanks for listening.
Comments
-
Minka
Hi Minka,
Sorry for †he difficult time. It will be nice if someone from your family can come and stay with you for at least one week during surgery and post operation recovery. My son did come for 3 days , it was very important for me seeing him before my surgery. If you leave alone a visiting nurse could be an option. If you do need Chemo you can always do in in other state, even a surgery could be done at your son's geographic region. It is not uncommon for BC patients to travel for treatment. Ask you son to come and discuss it with your family.
Hugs0 -
Hi sweet lady -- I am so
Hi sweet lady -- I am so sorry you are going through this. You do know you will go through this OK and recover, right? It is a scary journey indeed, but you're taking charge of the situation. I had a lumpectomy, with chemo and now starting radiation. Other ladies here will be able to let you know about mastectomy. As you go through each process you will see how the fear of the unknown was bigger than the actual experience. You'll also notice how fast the process will go. And most importantly, you will recover.
When I feel anxious I pray. It is important to have faith when going through this process, and to always remember you are not alone. We are here to listen, and we care.
This is the right place. You will find understanding and support here. We can relate so we understand.
Please let us know as you go through each step. You can ask anything and there will always be someone here to answer your question(s). I feel like this is part of my family. I am sure you will feel the same way.
Please remember to always stay positive.
You are in my thoughts and prayers.
God bless you.0 -
surgery
Minka,
Check out what you reach for in the house. In the kitchen, the bathroom, where every you may need to raise your arms. Move what ever you will need daily to a spot lower than your shoulder. You probably will not be able to raise your arms/arm for a bit. I had bilateral mastectomy and forgot a couple of things... Good thing my husband was home at the time.
The surgery isn't bad. I didn't realize the itchy feeling I had was from the surgery. I thought it may have been residual chemo stuff. Use soft cotton sheets and soft cotton shirts after surgery and extra pillows. I didn't have much pain, the incisions will probably be numb for a bit.
Chemo is also doable. Check out the ACS website for suggestions on what to eat and such. Stay away from sick people and carry hand sanitizer!
It is not selfish to want your family close. My daughter flew from colorado to california once a month during chemo and stayed a week after surgery. It helped me keep my sanity.
All the best,
Cindy0 -
Minka
so sorry you had to join us all but glad you don't have to go
it alone. I learned more from this site than from all my doctors
combined. So hold to us and come for support, advise and hugs
whenever you need to. The time after the diagnosis is very
overwhelming, you get a crash course in cancer and you had no
idea just how horrific cancer can be.
But be assured, once you get your game plan on and start the
fight of your life, you will feel better. I used this time to arm
myself with knowledge, it kept me busy and mind from wandering.
I hope you will have your family come, I pretty much did it alone
and would not recommend it. It's so nice to have someone to hold
you. Tell us more about your surgery, maybe on a different thread
so we can give you more advice, will you have immediate reconstruction?
Sleep and dream of your recovery Minka!
Hugs,
Ayse0 -
Minkaaysemari said:Minka
so sorry you had to join us all but glad you don't have to go
it alone. I learned more from this site than from all my doctors
combined. So hold to us and come for support, advise and hugs
whenever you need to. The time after the diagnosis is very
overwhelming, you get a crash course in cancer and you had no
idea just how horrific cancer can be.
But be assured, once you get your game plan on and start the
fight of your life, you will feel better. I used this time to arm
myself with knowledge, it kept me busy and mind from wandering.
I hope you will have your family come, I pretty much did it alone
and would not recommend it. It's so nice to have someone to hold
you. Tell us more about your surgery, maybe on a different thread
so we can give you more advice, will you have immediate reconstruction?
Sleep and dream of your recovery Minka!
Hugs,
Ayse
I had a lumpectomy and radiation fec 2010. My mom had a bi-lateral Mastectomy in January of this year. She was early stage, and didn't need further treatment after surgery. I was her caregiver after surgery. May I suggest that you take a small pillow with you to put under the seat belt on you way home from the hospital? Also you will have drains to remove fluid after surgery, for maybe 1 to 2 weeks, possibly longer. I helped her with that until she could do it on her own. She recovered very well( she is 81). She had not reconstructive surgery after. I wish you the best on your journey, Hugs, Mary0 -
Wishing you a speedy recovery
I had left mast. in November 2010, chemo and rads since then. It is terrifying but it gets better.
Hang in there, and don't feel bad about wanting your family around that sounds normal to me.
I went back to work 2 weeks after surgery and was truly surprised by how little pain I had and didn't fill my pain med script.
Also, I think the mood swings are pretty typical, I still have them...one minute fine the next in tears.
Take care, we'll be there with you Thursday,
Jennifer0 -
Hi Minka,grams2jc said:Wishing you a speedy recovery
I had left mast. in November 2010, chemo and rads since then. It is terrifying but it gets better.
Hang in there, and don't feel bad about wanting your family around that sounds normal to me.
I went back to work 2 weeks after surgery and was truly surprised by how little pain I had and didn't fill my pain med script.
Also, I think the mood swings are pretty typical, I still have them...one minute fine the next in tears.
Take care, we'll be there with you Thursday,
Jennifer
Wow.. haven't we all walked in your shoes. Believe me when I say it will be over before you know it. I like Jennifer above me just completed my radiation phase, prior to that I had a double mastectomy and chemo. I only had the tumor in my left breast and a lumpectomy wasn't an option for me. I also made the decision at the time too to remove my right healthy breast as well because I wanted to prevent if I could having to go down this road again. Are you still going to have to do chemo and radiation once you have a mastectomy? You are so brave, it's not an easy decision to make and it was once I grappled with for quite some time because I had chemotherapy first.
I will be thinking and praying for you this Thursday.
Hugs,
Lorrie0 -
HI Minka, Sorry you have to
HI Minka, Sorry you have to go through this, It is so hard and very scary. I had a bilat. mastectomy. Cancer in both. It was overwhelming before surgery. Had many scans and biopsies. Waiting by the phone for all the results to come in was so draining. Prayer put me at peace and my husband and I got through. Finally I had the mastectomies. Don't be afraid, you'll get through this and be ready for the next step of your journey.
I kept a journal with dividers so I had everything orgainized. I look refer back to it alot. August will be one year since surgery and sept. I started chemo and it all went fast.
We are here for you at all times.
Please keep us posted.
Hugs,
Annette0 -
I'm sorry that you joinedaysemari said:Minka
so sorry you had to join us all but glad you don't have to go
it alone. I learned more from this site than from all my doctors
combined. So hold to us and come for support, advise and hugs
whenever you need to. The time after the diagnosis is very
overwhelming, you get a crash course in cancer and you had no
idea just how horrific cancer can be.
But be assured, once you get your game plan on and start the
fight of your life, you will feel better. I used this time to arm
myself with knowledge, it kept me busy and mind from wandering.
I hope you will have your family come, I pretty much did it alone
and would not recommend it. It's so nice to have someone to hold
you. Tell us more about your surgery, maybe on a different thread
so we can give you more advice, will you have immediate reconstruction?
Sleep and dream of your recovery Minka!
Hugs,
Ayse
I'm sorry that you joined the pink sisters club, but now, you are surrounded by lots of support, hope and encouragement now. I do hope that someone can come to help you after your surgery. I will be praying for you.
Hugs, Lex0 -
It's a damned scary place to
It's a damned scary place to be, to know you have cancer but not yet be sure about the plan to get rid of it. And get rid of it you will.
Hopefully your family can come be with you, but regardless we will be there to help too.
It seems like the most immediate concern is the upcoming mastectomy...I had a bilateral in Jan. (Simple/prophylactic on the right, modified radical on the left, no reconstruction at this time.) I'm glad you've got your post mastectomy garments, they'll help you a lot. And the note about moving things to a reachable height is really important. Another reminder, you'll only be able to lift 10 lbs or less for a while. I was also told no repetitive motions (vacuuming/weeding) for six months.
Have you talked with your doc about drain care? For me, they were very annoying. I kept the last one for 3 weeks. Others here have had theirs for longer. Also be sure to talk with your doc about what exercises to do and when to start them. The exercises will help you get your range of motion back. Finally, be sure to talk with your doc about Lymphedema. You're already at risk because of your lumpectomy and a mastectomy increases the risk, especially if lymph nodes are removed. There are simple precautions you can take to reduce your risk...no blood pressure, IV, needles on your risk side...there's more so be sure to talk with your doc about it.
I found it easier to sleep, and to get out of the bed, when I was elevated. I used a wedge pillow and a couple of bed pillows. I also used smaller pillows to position my arms comfortably. Some here have slept in recliners following their surgery.
As for pain management...you will have less pain if you take the pain pills as scheduled. Don't wait for the pain to get really bad before taking something. Then once the pain pill has kicked in, that's the time to get up and walk a little, even if it's only to the toilet. Oh yea...my second trip to the toilet at the hospital, I felt a little wobbly. So I used the hand rail to support me as I sat down...DO NOT do that! It hurt worse than anything ever for me and stayed in the hospital an extra day until we got the pain under control.
I hope this helps you feel stronger and more ready to face this journey. Remember, whatever comes we'll help you get through it. Please come back and let us know how you're doing...ask more questions as you have them.
Hugs,
Linda0 -
Minka, I am so very sorry tobutterflylvr said:Hi Minka,
Wow.. haven't we all walked in your shoes. Believe me when I say it will be over before you know it. I like Jennifer above me just completed my radiation phase, prior to that I had a double mastectomy and chemo. I only had the tumor in my left breast and a lumpectomy wasn't an option for me. I also made the decision at the time too to remove my right healthy breast as well because I wanted to prevent if I could having to go down this road again. Are you still going to have to do chemo and radiation once you have a mastectomy? You are so brave, it's not an easy decision to make and it was once I grappled with for quite some time because I had chemotherapy first.
I will be thinking and praying for you this Thursday.
Hugs,
Lorrie
Minka, I am so very sorry to read this about you. Please know that I will be praying for you on Thursday.
Hugs, Megan0 -
I hope you can get that
I hope you can get that surgeon to remove both breasts!! Push him if that is what you want! And make sure since you are allergic to so many other pain meds, that that young doc. of yours has something stronger for you to take than just tylenol! Some women need pain meds after a mastectomy and some don't. I would hate for you to suffer thru needlessly. This is something you definitely don't want to "suffer thru it" til it gets better. There has to be SOMETHING he can give you. Don't forget about the camisoles with the drain pouches too. They really do come in handy and feel good, at least it did for me.
Don't forget all those other tips I gave you when we chatted that one night. If you need them again, let me know and I can get in touch with you again.
The DCIS, ductal carcinoma in situ, is a cancer that resides in the milk ducts and is the earliest form of cancer, actually stage 0. That is what I had. I hope your invasive cancer is not spread very much and hope it has not spread to the lymph nodes.
Please be aware that just because you are getting a mastectomy does NOT GUARANTEE you of being rad or chemo free. That depends on your margins and lymph nodes. Some surgeons might not make that clear enough to the patients.
Hope to chat with you before your surgery, if not, I wish you all the best, good surgeon skills, little apin and a good recovery!0 -
Minka, I had a lumpectomymamolady said:surgery
Minka,
Check out what you reach for in the house. In the kitchen, the bathroom, where every you may need to raise your arms. Move what ever you will need daily to a spot lower than your shoulder. You probably will not be able to raise your arms/arm for a bit. I had bilateral mastectomy and forgot a couple of things... Good thing my husband was home at the time.
The surgery isn't bad. I didn't realize the itchy feeling I had was from the surgery. I thought it may have been residual chemo stuff. Use soft cotton sheets and soft cotton shirts after surgery and extra pillows. I didn't have much pain, the incisions will probably be numb for a bit.
Chemo is also doable. Check out the ACS website for suggestions on what to eat and such. Stay away from sick people and carry hand sanitizer!
It is not selfish to want your family close. My daughter flew from colorado to california once a month during chemo and stayed a week after surgery. It helped me keep my sanity.
All the best,
Cindy
Minka, I had a lumpectomy with rads. It looks like the other pink sisters that have had your surgery have offered you lots of help.
Please accept my prayers, support and lots of gentle hugs.
Sue
0 -
What I Wish They Had Told Me
There is not much you can do about what to expect with a mastectomy, so maybe they don't think it's important to fill you in. And, of course, everyone is different. But here are the things I wish I had known: the scar will look really awful at first, but it definitely gets a lot better. Resolves into a nice little line. When the breast goes, so do the nerves. Your chest will be more or less numb, although some feeling comes back gradually. Occasionally some "phantom" sensations, too. They take a lot of tissue from under the arm (at least for me) and it will take a lot of stretching to get your range of motion back. Ask them when, not if, you can start physical therapy. Sometimes the scar is very hard and tight, and your physical therapist will massage it, as well as stretching the arm. Breaking up the scar tissue helps with range of motion. I didn't know what to wear at first, and no one had any suggestions. Nice that you can stay home for a while -- just put on a soft cotton shirt and be comfortable. Pin your drain bulb(s) to a soft ribbon around your neck during your shower, and let the ribbon hang to dry before the next shower. I had very, very little pain. I think I took a painkiller only once. Everyone is different, and if it hurts you should take painkillers -- but don't let anticipation of pain make you miserable. You won't be able to sleep on that side for several months. To my mind, that's an argument for doing one side at a time, because sleeping on my back means not really sleeping.
Good luck -- my thoughts are with you.0 -
Masectomy
Hi Minka,
I was in your shoes 12 months ago, there is a lot of help from this site, so hang in there with us, ok? I had a bi-lateral masectomy instead of a lumpnectomy. You will stay one or two nights in the hospital, the night nurses are very attentive. If you do not have someone to stay with you, you will be ok. You will need a ride home as you will be very weak. The pillow over your chest is needed between the seat belt. I could not use pump soap or lotion the first few days because I couldn't push them down. Be sure and have some milk, water, or other liquid in small containers you can lift. You may need a friend or a home nurse to help you with your drains the first few days. I had to go back to my plastic surgeon about 4 days after surgery so you may need someone to drive you. I had small pillows shaped like hearts that helped under my arms. I didn't need very many pain pills, but even a few may make you very constipated so be sure and have a laxative on hand. Have food cooked and in small light weight containers that you can place in the microwave. It is so normal not to want to do this alone, if your family can't make it, please tell a few friends, you will be amazed at how people want to help you. Sure hope this helps you a little. By the way, reconstruction was started on me at the time of the masectomy, it saved another hospital visit. God bless you,0 -
Wish they would have told memollieb said:What I Wish They Had Told Me
There is not much you can do about what to expect with a mastectomy, so maybe they don't think it's important to fill you in. And, of course, everyone is different. But here are the things I wish I had known: the scar will look really awful at first, but it definitely gets a lot better. Resolves into a nice little line. When the breast goes, so do the nerves. Your chest will be more or less numb, although some feeling comes back gradually. Occasionally some "phantom" sensations, too. They take a lot of tissue from under the arm (at least for me) and it will take a lot of stretching to get your range of motion back. Ask them when, not if, you can start physical therapy. Sometimes the scar is very hard and tight, and your physical therapist will massage it, as well as stretching the arm. Breaking up the scar tissue helps with range of motion. I didn't know what to wear at first, and no one had any suggestions. Nice that you can stay home for a while -- just put on a soft cotton shirt and be comfortable. Pin your drain bulb(s) to a soft ribbon around your neck during your shower, and let the ribbon hang to dry before the next shower. I had very, very little pain. I think I took a painkiller only once. Everyone is different, and if it hurts you should take painkillers -- but don't let anticipation of pain make you miserable. You won't be able to sleep on that side for several months. To my mind, that's an argument for doing one side at a time, because sleeping on my back means not really sleeping.
Good luck -- my thoughts are with you.
I had a lumpectomy (2 tumors in the left breast). Since the cancer had unfortunately spread into the lymph nodes, 18 were removed and I had to have chemo as well as radiation. Had no advice whatsoever on what to wear while I had the drain in (almost 6 weeks). Fortunately I had one house gown with a zipper down the front, also wore some of husband's old oversized cotton T-shirts. For the shower I put one of my metal chain belts around my waist and fastened the drain on to it. Also I had a shower stool in the bathtub and husband fastened a grip onto the tub for me to grab. It made it easier and safer to step into the tub.
Good luck, my dear.
Marlene0 -
Hi Minkalou26573 said:Masectomy
Hi Minka,
I was in your shoes 12 months ago, there is a lot of help from this site, so hang in there with us, ok? I had a bi-lateral masectomy instead of a lumpnectomy. You will stay one or two nights in the hospital, the night nurses are very attentive. If you do not have someone to stay with you, you will be ok. You will need a ride home as you will be very weak. The pillow over your chest is needed between the seat belt. I could not use pump soap or lotion the first few days because I couldn't push them down. Be sure and have some milk, water, or other liquid in small containers you can lift. You may need a friend or a home nurse to help you with your drains the first few days. I had to go back to my plastic surgeon about 4 days after surgery so you may need someone to drive you. I had small pillows shaped like hearts that helped under my arms. I didn't need very many pain pills, but even a few may make you very constipated so be sure and have a laxative on hand. Have food cooked and in small light weight containers that you can place in the microwave. It is so normal not to want to do this alone, if your family can't make it, please tell a few friends, you will be amazed at how people want to help you. Sure hope this helps you a little. By the way, reconstruction was started on me at the time of the masectomy, it saved another hospital visit. God bless you,
I'm so sorry you
Hi Minka
I'm so sorry you joined this club! Yet glad at the same time that you have some people to talk to that know exactly what your going through! I had a mastectomy in Dec of this year. My biggest pain in the butt was the drain tubes. At my hospital, the breast care specialist nurse gave me a bright pink snap up gown with special cut outs for the drain tubes, I had two on one side because I had an immediate implant put in. looking back, The mastectomy was not so bad. I didn't need much help at home. Just had to do things at my own pace. Chemo and radiation followed, All were tiresome but doable. The mastectomy wasn't the worst thing in my treatment plan. The smaller things annoyed me more! You can do this! Emotional support is more needed than physical support. Good luck!
I will be watching for updates from you!
Hugs & prayers
Renee0 -
Minka
I had bilateral mastectomy June 2010. I spent 2 nights in the hospital. My husband made sure that all dishes I would need for the day were on the counter. As soon as I felt I could, I started raising my arms to open the cabinets. The drains were the most annoying part. Mine were taken out 10 days later. I healed well. In August I started 6 rounds of Taxotere/Cytoxan every 3 weeks followed by Neulasta shot. In Jan 2011 I started 28 rounds of radiation. I'm now one year past and had a clean xray (no more mammos). I'm scheduled for scar revision mid August to remove the angel wings. No reconstruction for me. I'm 62 now and have had 12 surgeries in 5 years. Wishing you the best and I'll keep you in my prayers.
{{hugs}} Char0 -
Minka .. Welcome ...cahjah75 said:Minka
I had bilateral mastectomy June 2010. I spent 2 nights in the hospital. My husband made sure that all dishes I would need for the day were on the counter. As soon as I felt I could, I started raising my arms to open the cabinets. The drains were the most annoying part. Mine were taken out 10 days later. I healed well. In August I started 6 rounds of Taxotere/Cytoxan every 3 weeks followed by Neulasta shot. In Jan 2011 I started 28 rounds of radiation. I'm now one year past and had a clean xray (no more mammos). I'm scheduled for scar revision mid August to remove the angel wings. No reconstruction for me. I'm 62 now and have had 12 surgeries in 5 years. Wishing you the best and I'll keep you in my prayers.
{{hugs}} Char
I am so sorry for all your heart break and discomfort. You've come to the right place. We offer support, search sites and many years of experience.
Take a deep breath ... as you are in good company -- and we are here for you 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.
Peace, Strength, Courage and Hope.
Vicki Sam0 -
I'm wishing you good luckgrams2jc said:Wishing you a speedy recovery
I had left mast. in November 2010, chemo and rads since then. It is terrifying but it gets better.
Hang in there, and don't feel bad about wanting your family around that sounds normal to me.
I went back to work 2 weeks after surgery and was truly surprised by how little pain I had and didn't fill my pain med script.
Also, I think the mood swings are pretty typical, I still have them...one minute fine the next in tears.
Take care, we'll be there with you Thursday,
Jennifer
I'm wishing you good luck with your surgery on Thursday. Please post again to update us.
Hugs, Diane0
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