A Thought for the Caregivers (dedicated to all caregivers)

2

Comments

  • tabur
    tabur Member Posts: 71 Member
    #22
    "And you are there, holding
    "And you are there, holding our hand as the struggle ends"

    That line really got to me...
  • sharpy102
    sharpy102 Member Posts: 368 Member
    #23
    herdizziness said:

    Ohh Sophie
    You made me cry. She's your Mom, of course she realized you were there for her, and were next to her as she made her journey to another place and time.
    If there is a Heaven, she's watching over you and loving you. You'll always have her heart.
    As I've told my children, when I pass, look for a star in the sky, they'll know the right one when they see it. And it'll be me, shining down on them, pouring my everlasting love to them, I shall always be there, in their hearts, just like your mother is in yours, she will never ever leave your heart.
    Winter Marie

    thank you
    Hey Marie:

    Thank you for your note....interesting...Mom said the same to me...she always told me that when I'll look up on the sky, and find the brightest star that's her...and I often look up and look for her. I do see her! But it still bothers me that she is so quiet...because she also promised me that she'll talk to me. And I know she will come back, she just have to get over the past...or...at least, I hope she'll come back. She has to!
  • sharpy102
    sharpy102 Member Posts: 368 Member
    #24
    AnneCan said:

    Sophie
    Your Mom knows + she loves + appreciates you for it. You stepped up big time at such a young age. Some adults would never have been able to do 1/2 of what you did. Be proud; you are an inspiration to me + I am honoured to know you.

    thank you Anne
    Thank you Anne...you're nice.
  • sharpy102
    sharpy102 Member Posts: 368 Member
    #25
    Kathleen808 said:

    Sophie
    Sophie,
    Your love for your mom is so pure and she knew it then and knows it now. She may not have spoken to you yet but she is guiding you. You are an amazing young woman. She is proud. We are proud of you.

    Aloha,
    Kathleen

    thank you to you as well
    Kathleen: thank you for your note too...I wish i was proud of myself, but there's nothing I can be proud of...I couldn't help my Mommy...she left me...>.<
  • Jaylo969
    Jaylo969 Member Posts: 824 Member
    #26
    tabur said:

    "And you are there, holding
    "And you are there, holding our hand as the struggle ends"

    That line really got to me...

    been both
    3 weeks after I finished my chemo I became caregiver for both parents. My Dad had been on Hospice at home for 2 years, Amaloyd strokes, and I took care of him for 1 year prior to my own dx. 3 weeks after I finished up my chemo my Mom was dx'd with advanced lung cancer in both lungs and it had spread throughout her body. I basically moved in.

    In my opinion from my own experience being a caregiver is much harder than being a patient.
    I would do it all over again.Yes, indeed..

    -Pat
  • KathiM
    KathiM Member Posts: 8,028 Member
    #27
    Jaylo969 said:

    been both
    3 weeks after I finished my chemo I became caregiver for both parents. My Dad had been on Hospice at home for 2 years, Amaloyd strokes, and I took care of him for 1 year prior to my own dx. 3 weeks after I finished up my chemo my Mom was dx'd with advanced lung cancer in both lungs and it had spread throughout her body. I basically moved in.

    In my opinion from my own experience being a caregiver is much harder than being a patient.
    I would do it all over again.Yes, indeed..

    -Pat

    I, too, Pat!
    I'm a double cancer survivor, and have been a caregiver for my retarded daughter, my sister, my beau, and now my mom.


    Caregiving is much harder, IMHO, and fairly thankless...(other than your own feelings of caring for someone you love).

    Hugs, Kathi
  • Buckwirth
    Buckwirth Member Posts: 1,258 Member
    #28
    KathiM said:

    I, too, Pat!
    I'm a double cancer survivor, and have been a caregiver for my retarded daughter, my sister, my beau, and now my mom.


    Caregiving is much harder, IMHO, and fairly thankless...(other than your own feelings of caring for someone you love).

    Hugs, Kathi

    Family
    Who is not there, often turn against you, or question your dedication.

    Much easier being the patient.

    Love to all

    Blake
  • Unknown
    Unknown
    #29
    Buckwirth said:

    Family
    Who is not there, often turn against you, or question your dedication.

    Much easier being the patient.

    Love to all

    Blake

    This comment has been removed by the Moderator
  • Buckwirth
    Buckwirth Member Posts: 1,258 Member
    #30
    Bumping back up
    Seems like a good time.
  • jjaj133
    jjaj133 Member Posts: 867 Member
    #31
    Beautiful.

    Beautiful.
  • Jaylo969
    Jaylo969 Member Posts: 824 Member
    #32
    Buckwirth said:

    Bumping back up
    Seems like a good time.

    Yes, a very good time
    Thanks for bumping this one up Blake. It does seem appropriate, especially today.

    My Mom has been gone for 6 months & my Dad will be gone 8 months tomorrow. It still hurts so bad and I miss them so much but time has a way of healing the heart.

    Bump...
  • abmb
    abmb Member Posts: 311
    #33
    Thank you so much. Margaret

    Thank you so much. Margaret
  • Buzzard
    Buzzard Member Posts: 3,043 Member
    #34
    abmb said:

    Thank you so much. Margaret

    Thank you so much. Margaret

    Thank you Blake...........
    Gives me solace to read it over and over again, I get a calm feeling............Clift
  • tootsie1
    tootsie1 Member Posts: 5,044 Member
    #35
    Wonderful post
    Beautiful! Thanks for posting it.

    *hugs*
    Gail
  • Lelia
    Lelia Member Posts: 98
    #36
    Beautiful post.
    I can't say it any better than others already have. It never seems I'm doing enough, I'd do anything to make things better. It's the most helpless feeling ever and I've found 'helpless' a very strange place to be, not in my repertoire.

    Thank you Blake, I didn't know there were people like you and am very grateful to have found CSN.
  • SisterSledge
    SisterSledge Member Posts: 332 Member
    #37
    sharpy102 said:

    thank you
    Hey Marie:

    Thank you for your note....interesting...Mom said the same to me...she always told me that when I'll look up on the sky, and find the brightest star that's her...and I often look up and look for her. I do see her! But it still bothers me that she is so quiet...because she also promised me that she'll talk to me. And I know she will come back, she just have to get over the past...or...at least, I hope she'll come back. She has to!

    Promises
    Promises are sometimes given even though we have no idea how we will fulfill them. Perhaps your Mom has not yet found a path that will bring her to you. Have patience...and know that your mom resides in all that is beautiful.
  • BettyJoM
    BettyJoM Member Posts: 82
    #38
    AnneCan said:

    Sophie
    Your Mom knows + she loves + appreciates you for it. You stepped up big time at such a young age. Some adults would never have been able to do 1/2 of what you did. Be proud; you are an inspiration to me + I am honoured to know you.

    Sophie
    I have a granddaughter just about your age. you are wonderful to have taken care of your mom as much as you did. Some people wont do anything to help sick family but as young as you are you did what you could. you need to feel so proud of yourself
    you know its natural to feel some kind of guilt after someone dies. I still remember many many years ago my husband's little brother asked me to make him beef stew and I told him next week, and he died 2 days later. It was a stupid thing to feel guilty about but I did and I still remember it today, 40 years later

    When my husband died 13 years ago, I spent 3 months taking care of him here at home, only left the house twice in 3 months. I felt so guilty after he died because I am a nurse, I should have known sooner he was sick, maybe he could have gotten better if he was diagnosed sooner.
    Honey, we do what we can, be proud of yourself and know that some day we will see them again
    Now its time to take care of yourself sophie
    Betty Jo
  • BettyJoM
    BettyJoM Member Posts: 82
    #39
    SisterSledge said:

    Promises
    Promises are sometimes given even though we have no idea how we will fulfill them. Perhaps your Mom has not yet found a path that will bring her to you. Have patience...and know that your mom resides in all that is beautiful.

    Janine is so right

    Janine is so right
  • Marianne313
    Marianne313 Member Posts: 124
    #40
    Lelia said:

    Beautiful post.
    I can't say it any better than others already have. It never seems I'm doing enough, I'd do anything to make things better. It's the most helpless feeling ever and I've found 'helpless' a very strange place to be, not in my repertoire.

    Thank you Blake, I didn't know there were people like you and am very grateful to have found CSN.

    crying again (or still, not sure which)
    this was nice. I don't consider myself a caregiver though, just someone who loves the person who is ill and while I know she'll die I'm going to do everything, regardless of how small or big, to try to make sure she's here at least one more day, year, hour, minute so that's why I keep caring and giving, I feel like the more I do the less she has to worry over and that relieves stress (I hope) and saves her strength (I hope) ....because I guess none of us ever give up, regardless of how dire the news may be, even though we KNOW, we just won't give up.

    sorry if that doesn't make sense.

    I love this post. I'm coming to care so much for all of you even though I've never talked to most of you. You're all so special. Thank you.

    Marianne
  • pebjns
    pebjns Member Posts: 14
    #41
    Caring for Mom
    I would do anything to help my mom out. Doctor's visits, going to treatments, helping out in the house, grocery shopping, whatever she needs I'll always be there.

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