Skin cancer support

4MJM

Today I had my 13th surgery to remove a basal cell and have had melanomas in the past cancer road of 20 years (I am 39). I am so blessed with my history of finding them early and an amazing dermatologist. I have finally put my finger to why I have been mentally struggling, and I believe it is the lack of support of people going through something similar to relate to. I have amazing friends and family that support me and am ashamed to admit I hide and downplay what I go through often because I don’t want to be a victim and know how good I have it. That being said, I don’t have anyone to talk some of this through with who can offer more than “sorry to hear that” with each diagnosis. Has anyone else felt this way or have an outlet to recommend?

Mulligan45

I understand. I have had a few SC spots removed and want to find a support group to talk about it. My biggest issue is the anxiety about a return of cancer or that I will get more cancer (though I can accept that this is very likely). I feel like people don’t really understand unless rhey have had cancer as well. My wife is very frustrated with me over my continued focus on SC. But everything I have read from survivors describes exactly how I have been living. I’m sry sad and lonely and though I have a therapist and am taking meds for my anxiety, I still feel very little hope or excitement. I am a little older than you but not much )mid 40s) and still have so much I want to do with my life, but my fear is debilitating for me. I guess that I probably am not sounding very good right now but I hope it helps to know you aren’t alone. Good luck on this path of life.

ctcurl

I totally understand. Have been told I have another BCC on left side of nose sort of at the end. This will be the 3rd. The first 2 were MOHS surgeries which I just don't want to have again. I don't know whether this is an isolated lesion or a recurrence of what was supposedly taken out actually 20 and 28 years ago. I told myself NOT to bring it up when I met my sister and cousin for lunch last weekend because they have had worse things to deal with, but I did and now I feel guilty about it like they'll think I just want to bring attention to myself. I could kick myself for even bringing it up. And, of course, it didn't help me in deciding what to do about my current situation. Considering SRT for this one, but it's not a walk in the park either. Not to mention, scheduling appts. is such a challenge now.

4MJM

https://csn.cancer.org/discussion/comment/1714530#Comment_1714530

It doesn’t make me feel better that you are struggling too but glad we, with a similar history, can row the boat together! I will say I am a Christian and that helps a lot. I know that no matter what the day brings the worst that can happen to me is I meet Jesus!

I have struggled over the years joining in all the outdoor family things (we are a farming family and love ATV’s) and I have had to learn how to balance life with precaution that sometimes feels like fear. I can’t do what everyone else does the way they do it but I can join in my own way and have finally learned not to care what I look like doing it. I am sorry you deal with anxiety too. I encourage you to focus on what you can change or just sit in and enjoy today. I find focusing on the blessings help a lot for me. I have a beautiful family, and am thankful this last one wasn’t a melanoma or worse. I wish you the best in your treatment with what you decide and with your family!

4MJM

I think the lesson for us both here is sharing the burden of life doesn’t take away from someone else’s, but just reminds us we are not alone. I know some don’t respond to it that way and I don’t know what your family’s reactions were, but we aren't designed to be isolated. I am glad you did share with them and I thank you for sharing with me too. I hope you find a great support system in them and wish you the best on your treatment.