This is so surreal I still can't quite believe it...

marosa
marosa Member Posts: 334 Member

4 years ago last february I decided to post for the first time here.  I had had a partial nephrectomy September 2014 for RCC.  That post led to many more and thanks to this board and to many members past and present I retained my sanity and got thru the mental rollercoaster that threatened to play havoc with my mind and emotions.  Many generous and loving people were there for me... a very special mention for Fox who accepted nothing less than courage and positivity and with whom I became very close with.  Miss him always and more so today.

Time has gone by and its been awhile that I don't think about it everyday.  Last Sunday I saw blood in the toilet and checked and knew it was not me.  Today, after first trying antibiotics for infection or checking out for kidney stones, my husband was diagnosed this afternoon with kidney cancer, almost same size and same right side as me. I can't believe such a rare cancer has struck us both in such similar ways. My forst reaction was crying and saying no, no, no, no... unable to accept or believe this could be true.  That was 5 hours ago.  He told one of our sons, the other is frlying back from China tonight.  He is calm, as he was for me, that is his way God bless him.  We had a bottle of wine and he was saying; at least we know who the good doctor is and where to find him.  I feel like Im in a bad dream.  We still don't know much more.  We are just telling our sons right now but I needed to come here to the place were I found so much confort some year ago.  Im hoping we can pass this very hard test with the courage thar Fox would have thought me and all of us capable of.  May you all be well.  My best thoughts to all.  Thank you for being there!

 

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Comments

  • eug91
    eug91 Member Posts: 471 Member
    oh man-

    On one hand, I'm shaken by the terrible luck, imagining what you and your family have already gone through and must face again. On the other hand, how fortunate that your husband has a living example of what can be done at his side. You know what to do and you've done it before - you'll do it again. 

    We're here for you. Sending you and your family prayers and virtual hugs. You've got this.

  • Allochka
    Allochka Member Posts: 1,074 Member
    Oh Marosa, so sorry for your

    Oh Marosa, so sorry for your husband! It is hard to believe indeed! 

    At the same time, you both know now that kidney cancer is not a death sentence. You've been through it, you survived and you are and will be NED. So he will be as well. You know what to do, what to check, what to expect, how to support. 

    You both will be fine. Husband will be nephed and NED, you will be brave and great support to him. Things will be all right!

    Hugs,

    Alla

  • Manufred
    Manufred Member Posts: 241 Member
    That's tough

    Can't imagine how horrible that must have felt.  Bright side is that you know RCC can be managed and even beaten.

    Hope it all works out for you both,

    Fred.

  • Dominick0711
    Dominick0711 Member Posts: 99 Member
    Crazy but your experience

    Crazy but your experience should go a long way towards keeping him and the rest of the family positive.  Will be thinking of you and him as you traveerse through this!  

  • jroby55
    jroby55 Member Posts: 40
    I'm sorry

    Sorry to hear that tough news, but your husband is right, you mnow someone who can help get you through it. You are in a unique position too because having gone through it you will be able to help him through in a way only a veteran survivor can... You will quite possibly have more insight into how he is feeling and thinking and can help him get through it. I will be praying for your husband and your family!

  • BoondockSaint
    BoondockSaint Member Posts: 242 Member
    Wow. What are the chances?

    Wow. What are the chances? Really, they have to be astronomical.

    Just to echo what everyone else has said we will definitely be praying for a quick and uneventful surgery. Secondly, you know the enemy, you know he can be defeated. 

    Big hugs to you guys!

    Chad & Pam

  • a_oaklee
    a_oaklee Member Posts: 566 Member
    edited March 2019 #8
    I am so sorry to hear this

    I am so sorry to hear this news.  It's so unfair.  The only good thing is that you do know how to proceed in his treatment.  No learning curve this time.   

    I think it would be a good idea to request a visit with a genetic specialist. 

    When my husband was diagnosed, we were concerned about the cause.  We live in a farming community.  It still amazes me that nobody seems to monitor what we all might have in common or been exposed to.   I would truly like to limit exposure to environmental causes.  Noone has even asked about family history.

    I've read quite a few of your posts, and I think you will be an inspiration for your husband.  Best wishes to you both.

  • donna_lee
    donna_lee Member Posts: 1,045 Member
    edited March 2019 #9
    So sorry to hear your news

    But it sounds like you have a plan.  You both have been thru the "routine" and I'm sure you'll come out the other side a bit worse for wear but successful.

    All good wishes to both of you and your family.

    Hugs,

    donna_lee

  • Cinnamongirl
    Cinnamongirl Member Posts: 199 Member
    Unbelievable

    I am so sorry to hear the news... but at least you two already have an idea of what comes next.

    You both will be in my prayers. 

    Cin

  • Jan4you
    Jan4you Member Posts: 1,330 Member
    OH Marosa, so sorry you are

    OH Marosa, so sorry you are both going through this cancer trip AGAIN~

    Glad your hubby has you and YOU have US!

    Sending you HOPE, CALM and continued healing!

    Jan

  • APny
    APny Member Posts: 1,995 Member
    Dear Marosa, I'm so very

    Dear Marosa, I'm so very sorry to hear that. Yes, it's totally surreal that such a rare cancer struck twice in one family. You're both in my thoughts. Stay strong! Hugs xx

  • Retcenturion
    Retcenturion Member Posts: 240 Member
    Awful news

    It's awful news to hear twice. You and your husband have been through this before now on the others side. Hopefully he will get through this without  complications. Sending positive thoughts for you and your husband.

  • daisybud
    daisybud Member Posts: 541 Member
    edited March 2019 #14
    So sorry,

    Sending prayers 

  • stub1969
    stub1969 Member Posts: 983 Member
    I would like to challenge the idea of....

    RCC being a "rare" cancer.  For example, I live in a small town in Iowa with a population of just over 2,000 people.  Less than 6 blocks from me is another man about my age that was diagnosed with RCC about 6 months before me.  The father of one of my colleagues recently passed away from mRCC.  I also personally know another person with RCC.  I find it hard to believe that there are only 60,000 new cases each year. 

    Marosa, I'm so sorry about this news.  Your husband is lucky to have you as a resource and advocate.  I know you guys will pull through this. 

    Wishing you and your family only the best.

    Stub 

  • en8236
    en8236 Member Posts: 30 Member
    prayers

    I am sure your experience will make it easy for him.

  • marosa
    marosa Member Posts: 334 Member
    Thank you all for your caring messages

    We know how much it means for us to stick together and help each other.  In many ways, we do it better than anyone else because we are or have been there.  I appreciate every single word in your messages.  They give me strength and help me be positive for my husband.  We will be busy getting ready to leave on Saturday to France.  I will get back with news when we are there and know more.  Thank you again, old friends and new.  Be well

  • Gtngbtr58 @aol.com
    Gtngbtr58 @aol.com Member Posts: 206 Member
    edited March 2019 #18
    Wow thats

    Alot to take-luckily your husband has a great support (you) and with your knowledge and experience you will guide him first hand.  Of course we will all be here along with you with prayers and hugs. Best of luck-keep us posted-June

  • Tapman63
    Tapman63 Member Posts: 137 Member
    Crazy!

    A big positive is that you both know what to expect and how to deal with everything. 

    In the 13 months since my surgery, two people I know have been diagnosed with kidney cancer.  One, like me, was found early when looking for something else.  The other had actual symptoms and does have some mets.  I thought the odds of that were big - but you have me beat!

  • Mighty Frog
    Mighty Frog Member Posts: 152 Member
    Be Strong.

    Be Strong.......

  • Hoss79
    Hoss79 Member Posts: 78 Member
    Sorry to hear this. Sending
    Sorry to hear this. Sending good karma.