Husband Just Diagnosed- Stage 3

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Comments

  • 123Kra
    123Kra Member Posts: 6
    lindary said:

    Fatigue

    Fatigue is part of the process. Some people may be hit by it more than others. It varies by person and type of treatment. Is he eating something when he is awake? I she going to teh bathroom regularly? Talk to his Dr and tell him what is going on. They are your best resource. 

    Yes, I have him eating about

    Yes, I have him eating about 5 servings of fruits/ veggies by making him smoothies. Plus he had a vegetable broth soup, a small pizza with whole wheat crust, cheese and shrimp. 2 small nutrition shakes.  He wasn't hungry today so liquids were the best option, though I wish he had more substantial foods.He's drinking about 8 pints of water but a ginger tea each day. he hasn't pooped in 48 hours... tonight I gave him a mild stool softener and a few prunes. He was only awake for about 6 hours today. Is that normal for day 4 of chemo? some people seem to say they continue to work and do things... I didn't expect him to be this tired. Maybe it will pass?

  • Simon24
    Simon24 Member Posts: 45
    edited March 2017 #23
    123Kra said:

    Yes, I have him eating about

    Yes, I have him eating about 5 servings of fruits/ veggies by making him smoothies. Plus he had a vegetable broth soup, a small pizza with whole wheat crust, cheese and shrimp. 2 small nutrition shakes.  He wasn't hungry today so liquids were the best option, though I wish he had more substantial foods.He's drinking about 8 pints of water but a ginger tea each day. he hasn't pooped in 48 hours... tonight I gave him a mild stool softener and a few prunes. He was only awake for about 6 hours today. Is that normal for day 4 of chemo? some people seem to say they continue to work and do things... I didn't expect him to be this tired. Maybe it will pass?

    Keep on doing what you are doing

    It sounds like you are a wonderful support for your husband.  My husband was diagnosed with NHL (diffuse Large B Cell Lymphoma) in July of 2015.  His treatment was R-CHOP, spinal methotrexate, and radiation.  He is in remission and we are very thankful.  Your husband is receiving a different treatment, but there are many people on this board who have experience with his treatment and I am sure they will answer any questions you have.  I believe that Max will be able to answer most of your questions.  You are doing the right thing trying to keep on top of the constipation.  My husband needed a prescription from his doctor because the stool softeners weren't effective in his case.  Don't hesitate to ask your doctor for help if he continues to have a problem.  Some people do continue to work during chemo, but my normally energetic husband had very little energy and did a lot of sleeping during certain phases of his chemo.  I would guess that fatigue is one of the most common side effects for people during treatment.  I wish you and your husband a very successful treatment.  Simone

     

  • lindary
    lindary Member Posts: 711 Member
    edited March 2017 #24
    constipation

    This was a fun one for me since I often had constipation before the cancer & chemo. What worked for me was generic senna. I would take it the night before chemo started, the day of chemo and for a few days after chemo. This was along with Fiber One brownies, apples & apple juice. (I can't stand prunes.)  Like I said, I had problems with constipation before and knew how bad I could get. I wasn't about to allow that happen while gong through chemo. 

  • Shayfey
    Shayfey Member Posts: 10
    edited March 2017 #25
    DadysGirl said:

    I'm so sorry about your

    I'm so sorry about your husband's diagnosis. Where was your husband's lump. Neck and how large was it from outside could you see it or just feel it?

    Hello

    Hi DadysGirl,

    Thanks for reaching out. My husband's lump was found on his right side, down where your neck meets your collarbone. The kicker is--he didn't find it, he had no clue it was even there! Here is why we are so grateful and think we caught it early--my husband has had very bad back issues the last couple of years, and after a dog attack (on him and our dog) last summer, his upper back got even worse. Long story short, he has a masseuse who has worked on him that last 2 years and knows his body pretty well. In mid-January during one of his massages, she actually found the lump and asked him what it was. As I said, he didn't even know there was something there. He immediately called our family physician and got in within the next week to be evaluated. And the rest is history. Three weeks later, after his initial scans and Xray, the lymphoma had already spread even more past his diaphragm. We're pretty sure had the lump not been found, or had he waited to go to the doctor, he would have been in a much later stage. 

     

  • Shayfey
    Shayfey Member Posts: 10
    edited March 2017 #26
    123Kra said:

    My 34 year old husband was

    My 34 year old husband was diagnosed with stage 4 two weeks ago and started ABVD last week. W are on day 4, and he is exhausted. it is hard watching him feel like this. i'm scared and am so worried about him. He was awake for about 6 hours today. He felt okay for three of them. Then the fatigue set back in. Does this get easier as I know what to expect from him? i haven't left his side the last 3 weeks but I'm worried I'm not being brave enough for him. Any advise or tips for a spouse? 

    Hi

    Hi 123Kra,

    Thank you so much for reaching out to me. I'm sorry it took me so long to reply! You are in the right place to talk and ask questions. You are in the same spot I was a month ago, so I know how you are feeling and I know what you are going through. Does it get easier? Not exactly. Does it get better? Yes. For me, the first few weeks were the worst. You're dealing with 15 different appointments and consulations and all the unknowns of what he might have, what stage he could be in, etc. It's terrifying, I know. But it sounds like your doctors are on it, just like ours was. Your husband is on ABVD like mine. It can be rough I've heard, but it really does come down to the person. It sounds like your husband had a lot taken out of him with the first round. Mine did not sleep that much, but complained that he felt like he had the flu the entire week. He was tired, often falling asleep on the couch, and we were doing a lot of trial and error with foods. Constipation is the biggest thing you need to worry about and stay on top of. I hope your doctor gave you some advice for a daily regimen--if not, I can share ours. The other important thing is that your husband still gets up and walks, and tries to do some "normal" tasks. After the third or fourth day he shouldn't be staying in bed all day (this is a combination of our doctor's orders and my opinion)...make sure he walks, gets his own water or food, etc. The good news is, so far we've found that the off week of chemo is much better, and we call it his "recovery" week. He's able to eat a little more, get out with me some, walk the dog, etc. You will eventually fall into a routine. But don't get comfortable, because side effects pop up at different times for different reasons. The second round of ABVD actually ended up effecting him more than the first round. He felt more tired the second time, and had more stomach problems. But overall, compared to what others are going through on this site, I would say his symptoms are mild and manageable. 

    You say you haven't left his side in 3 weeks--I totally get that. I don't know if you work or not, but I am still working full time and being his care giver. Those first few weeks I was missing work like crazy because I didn't want to miss any appointments. Eventually, it takes its toll, and you need to ask for help. Whether you have your family or his, or your friends, you need to let others help you so you can take care of yourself too. I know, easier said than done. I'm in the exact same boat as you, and it really does help when you carry a positive attitude. On the days where I am sad and crying and angry, he feels it too, and it brings the mood down. That's not to say you can't share or show your real feelings around him--but I'm learning it's best to talk to friends, family and people in these forums as well.

    You can be brave enough for him, because you are fighting for him. I was worried about that too. How will I keep up the strength to do all of this, while keeping a smile on my face? It's hard! You won't be able to every day. But you have to try. Try to continue doing your fun, normal things and don't always make the cancer the topic of conversation. For us--it's renting movies, ordering pizza, playing with our dog. Just spend time together, and make it quality time.

    I hope this helps--I know the others really helped me when I came on here (wow, just 27 days ago!). You'll look back a month from now too and realize how much you've accomplished. I saw you sent me a message about my blog--I'll respond to that separately. 

  • Shayfey
    Shayfey Member Posts: 10
    edited March 2017 #27
    lindary said:

    constipation

    This was a fun one for me since I often had constipation before the cancer & chemo. What worked for me was generic senna. I would take it the night before chemo started, the day of chemo and for a few days after chemo. This was along with Fiber One brownies, apples & apple juice. (I can't stand prunes.)  Like I said, I had problems with constipation before and knew how bad I could get. I wasn't about to allow that happen while gong through chemo. 

    Thanks

    Hi lindary, thank you for the advice. My husband is also on generic senna pills, and they do seem to work. We also have Miralax and Milk of Magnesia sitting around. I might try the fiber one brownies for him. This past week (off-chemo week) he was eating almost normal sized meals and something felt like it was "stuck" and he was in so much pain for most of the day Monday. Eventually it passed, but we're learning to stay more on top of it. 

  • po18guy
    po18guy Member Posts: 1,461 Member
    Sugar-free/diet/low caorie foods

    Does he like chocolate? Other sweets? The commonly used sugar substitutes in today's sugar-free candies and beverages are often a type of sugar alcohol, which causes water to migrate to the colon, with the predictable result. Excessive use can cause bloating and diarrhea, but moderate use has only a laxative effect. Cheap and easy to try.

    Glycerol (3-carbon)
    Erythritol (4-carbon)
    Threitol (4-carbon)
    Arabitol (5-carbon)
    Xylitol (5-carbon)
    Ribitol (5-carbon)
    Mannitol (6-carbon)
    Sorbitol (6-carbon)
    Galactitol (6-carbon)
    Fucitol (6-carbon)
    Iditol (6-carbon)
    Inositol (6-carbon; a cyclic sugar alcohol)
    Volemitol (7-carbon)
    Isomalt (12-carbon)
    Maltitol (12-carbon)
    Lactitol (12-carbon)
    Maltotriitol (18-carbon)
    Maltotetraitol (24-carbon)
    Polyglycitol 

  • Jeff148
    Jeff148 Member Posts: 184
    Miralax

    After my nightmare, I just stayed on miralax every day and did not have any other issues. It is a pretty harmless product.