Thanks for the emotional support

Lear Member Posts: 2

HI All,

This group is a god send to me.  My husband has stage 3 Merkel Cell Carcinoma.  We are in the surgery recovery stage and going into Radiation treatments soon.  I'm his primary caregiver and I'm hanging on by my fingernails.  Fortunately I do not have to work and he's retiring so I have the time and ability to do whatever is needed.  I find myself emotionally drained.  It's helpful to know there's others out there who understand.  I'll be checking into this site for help and inspiration.  Thanks to all of you for sharing.  It really does help.


  • Ladylacy
    Ladylacy Member Posts: 773 Member

    First off, let me say I'm sorry to hear about your husband.  It is hard to be a caregiver.  I have been my husband's caregiver since July 2014 when he was first diagnosed with case.  Now he is on in-home hospice and it is harder.  The most important thing is to take care of yourself too.  You are important and so is your well being.  

    Yes it is emotionally draining and sometimes I wonder if others really know what we the caregivers actually go thru and that includes the one we are helping.  People say how hard it is on the person with cancer and it is don't get me wrong, but it is also hard on the caregiver because we are the ones with them 24/7 and we are the ones watching them and we are the ones that they show their inner-most emotions to.

    Wishing you and your husband the best 

  • Lear
    Lear Member Posts: 2
    your support helps

    Thanks for the support ladies.  It really helps to be able to vent to someone who understands.  I appreciate the kind and wise words of encouragement.

  • grandmafay
    grandmafay Member Posts: 1,633 Member
    Six Years

    i was my husband's caregiver for 6 year before he lost his battle with colon cancer. Caregiving is indeed very hard. it is stressful, tiring, and just plain hard. Each of our experiences are a bit different, but we also share a lot. My husband and I were both newly retired when he received his dx of stage 4 colon cancer. He had numerous surgeries, many rounds of chemo, and radiation. I was very lucky that he was a good patient. Still, the fatigue and stress was overwhelming at times. I did learn to take care of myself, too. Probably my hardest lesson, and one I often forgot. its important to do something for yourself on a regular basis even if it is only a walk around the block or meeting a friend for coffee. I, too, found this board very helpful. I used to come here several times a day. It helped me laugh, cry, and just hang in there. It has now been 5 years since I lost my husband, but I still come now and then. I wish you and your husband the best. There are so many advances in treatment, and so many are able to beat cancer today. Take care, Fay 

  • Ladylacy
    Ladylacy Member Posts: 773 Member
    My mistake I meant to say

    My mistake I meant to say caregiver to my husband since July 2010 not July 2014.  But regardless of time, caregiving is hard and emotional and you have to take care of yourself too.