OMG...I was not prepared for what I look like....

eihtak

mom62 said:

Patience
Jayne,

Your body just went through major surgery don't forget to let it heal before you judge yourself. I'm sure you are swollen and not fully recovered. Give yourself time. I didn't have reconstruction but my scars took time to lighten. You can whine this is the place to do it, vent all you want. Be patient, you may see a difference in a few weeks.

((((hugs))))

Terry

WOW
I am newly diagnosed and meet with my doc on Thursday to discuss treatment options, but already have been told to get used to the mastectomy idea. How long after do you need to heal before any kind of reconstuction ???? if thats what its called can happen?

DebbyM

serenity92 said:

I looked....wish I hadn't.
I looked....wish I hadn't. Got to take my shower yesterday, decided I needed to buck up and look. I need to keep an eye out for infections and dying skin. I had to have all my incisions cut out and redone after my mastectomy because some of the skin died. Probably because my leukemia sometimes affects how I heal. Anyhow, I gotta say I took a good look in the mirror and proceeded to bawl my eyes out. I expected bruising and swelling. But I was unprepared for the huge incisions that look like I was put together with upholstery staples. And after all those months of the expanders I expected the implants would look huge at first. Instead they look like 'boy boobs' to me. Small, funky shaped, ugly....Please someone tell me this is just temporary! For months people have made such stupid and insensitive comments about "how lucky I am that I will have pretty, perky boobs". These are not pretty! I see the surgeon on Tuesday for a follow up...I am afraid I will start crying. I am sorry I sound like such a selfish brat. I just really hoped I wouldnt look so monstrous after all this....Is this normal?Sorry for whining. Jayne

Would it be possible Jayne
Would it be possible Jayne for you to get a 2nd opinion? Or, could it also be that you haven't had time yet to heal properly? I had a lumpectomy so I don't know a lot about this.


Sending hugs,


Debby

Angie2U

serenity92 said:

Thank you for your
Thank you for your responses...surgery was three and a half hours. Sitting in the hospital hooked up to I.V. And those ciculating booties. Doctor said after surgery he may want to,keep me a second night. I guess for pain, dizziness, my leukemia...and going home as a single mom with an eleven year old at home....hope not, dont much care for hospitals..on the down slide now, I hope....Jayne

Hoping that your recovery
Hoping that your recovery will be quick for you and that you can get home to that darling little girl.


Hugs, Angie

disneyfan2008

I can relate (not
I can relate (not reconstruction) with not wanting to see or look! TOOK me about 2 mths to look at recent hysterctomy...HAD front tooth pulled last month...(temp tooth in retainer) and still wont' look with out invisiline retainer in. Breast surgery 2008 took me about 5 mths..to look..

I am over the edge with "SEEING"

Feel better

Denise

VickiSam

disneyfan2008 said:

I can relate (not
I can relate (not reconstruction) with not wanting to see or look! TOOK me about 2 mths to look at recent hysterctomy...HAD front tooth pulled last month...(temp tooth in retainer) and still wont' look with out invisiline retainer in. Breast surgery 2008 took me about 5 mths..to look..

I am over the edge with "SEEING"

Feel better

Denise

Jayne .. Nothing, or no one can prepare us
for the loss of our 'natural breast'. There is nothing that I have SEEN, or been
thru that prepared me for this loss. I am talking thyroid surgery, radiation, 6
miscarriages - partial hysterectomy -- NOTHING....!!!

We have every right to cry, scream and yell. Our bodies will never, ever be the
same.

Disappointed, yes! It was so difficult to imagine what I would ended up looking
like after my tissue expander became fully expanded. What about those scars?

It took me several weeks -- to get in touch with reality, and to realize how
grateful I was to be alive -- how wonderful that there are PS in this world
that offer we Bilateral women .. options -- so many of these options were
not available -- a decade ago.

Gentle hugs .. positive thoughts, and happy healing.

Strength, Courage and Hope.

Vicki Sam

Kristin N

mom62 said:

Patience
Jayne,

Your body just went through major surgery don't forget to let it heal before you judge yourself. I'm sure you are swollen and not fully recovered. Give yourself time. I didn't have reconstruction but my scars took time to lighten. You can whine this is the place to do it, vent all you want. Be patient, you may see a difference in a few weeks.

((((hugs))))

Terry

Jayne, with some more time,
Jayne, with some more time, do you and your doctor think your results will be better? Sending hugs!

serenity92

VickiSam said:

Jayne .. Nothing, or no one can prepare us
for the loss of our 'natural breast'. There is nothing that I have SEEN, or been
thru that prepared me for this loss. I am talking thyroid surgery, radiation, 6
miscarriages - partial hysterectomy -- NOTHING....!!!

We have every right to cry, scream and yell. Our bodies will never, ever be the
same.

Disappointed, yes! It was so difficult to imagine what I would ended up looking
like after my tissue expander became fully expanded. What about those scars?

It took me several weeks -- to get in touch with reality, and to realize how
grateful I was to be alive -- how wonderful that there are PS in this world
that offer we Bilateral women .. options -- so many of these options were
not available -- a decade ago.

Gentle hugs .. positive thoughts, and happy healing.

Strength, Courage and Hope.

Vicki Sam

A couple weeks out now. I am
A couple weeks out now. I am coming to accept that it will never be what it was. I do adore my surgeon and think he really cares about getting me the best results possible. My leukemia messes things up sometimes as I dont heal the same as many people. I just need to quit expecting things to go back to "normal" now or ever. My surgeon keeps reminding me that this was major surgery and you dont just return to normal in a few days. He also gave me a lecture on accepting that there is a huge emotional toll that this journey takes us on, that contributes to our exhaustion and sadness. Thanks for the feedback. Jayne

eihtak

serenity92 said:

A couple weeks out now. I am
A couple weeks out now. I am coming to accept that it will never be what it was. I do adore my surgeon and think he really cares about getting me the best results possible. My leukemia messes things up sometimes as I dont heal the same as many people. I just need to quit expecting things to go back to "normal" now or ever. My surgeon keeps reminding me that this was major surgery and you dont just return to normal in a few days. He also gave me a lecture on accepting that there is a huge emotional toll that this journey takes us on, that contributes to our exhaustion and sadness. Thanks for the feedback. Jayne

One day at a time???
Sometimes I hate it when people say that to me, but sometimes it makes sense. I'm glad to hear that time is working in your favor and hope you are feeling/looking better every day. I have only posted a few times as I am new to breast cancer. I am 1yr out on my Anal Cancer treatment and for now doing well along those lines. In 2wks I am scheduled for a double mastectomy and am scared to death. Scared of the surgery its self and how I will look. I hope I have the patience to give myself time to heal, please remind me. My prayers are with you.