OMG...I was not prepared for what I look like....
Comments
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i can relate
dont know what kind of reconstruction you are doing but i go to the hospital march 1st for tram flap. my prayers are with you. let us know how you are doing when you get home and feel like it.0 -
Jayne ..classicpat said:i can relate
dont know what kind of reconstruction you are doing but i go to the hospital march 1st for tram flap. my prayers are with you. let us know how you are doing when you get home and feel like it.
best of luck today .. The unknown has a tenancy of getting the better of us.
My bilateral mastectomy and tissue expanders replacement took about 6 and half hours.
What I recall is pain, and the fact that you may not have a lot of upper arm strength
for pulling yourself out of the bed, or moving yourself around in bed. Ask for
assistance, and take the pain medication as prescribed by your Doctor. Your first
couple of days will be blurry --rest, sleep and move around as much as your
body can tolerate.
Strength, Courage and HOPE for a Cure.
Vicki Sam0 -
Had MY Exchange Surgery in June 2011
Good luck with your exchange surgery. In my experience it was not as difficult as the mastectomy. I had a reduction/lift on the non-cancer side and my tissue expander was replaced by an implant on the same day. I came home with two drains on the reconstructed side and one drain on the reduced side. Oh joy. How I love those drains (not). It is one step on the road to your new normal. Please keep us posted.
IRENE0 -
Wishing you the best withjessiesmom1 said:Had MY Exchange Surgery in June 2011
Good luck with your exchange surgery. In my experience it was not as difficult as the mastectomy. I had a reduction/lift on the non-cancer side and my tissue expander was replaced by an implant on the same day. I came home with two drains on the reconstructed side and one drain on the reduced side. Oh joy. How I love those drains (not). It is one step on the road to your new normal. Please keep us posted.
IRENE
Wishing you the best with your exchange surgery! This was a much easier surgery than the mastectomy. Felt like they were giving something back, and they were much better than I expected. It took a few tries, but they got it right and they are the same size and look real!
Now you are really one step closer to this being done.
Prayers for a speedy recovery.
Carol0 -
Jayne, praying for aclassicpat said:i can relate
dont know what kind of reconstruction you are doing but i go to the hospital march 1st for tram flap. my prayers are with you. let us know how you are doing when you get home and feel like it.
Jayne, praying for a successful surgery for you today! Please post when you can to let us know how you are.
Sue
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Thank you for yourcamul said:Wishing you the best with
Wishing you the best with your exchange surgery! This was a much easier surgery than the mastectomy. Felt like they were giving something back, and they were much better than I expected. It took a few tries, but they got it right and they are the same size and look real!
Now you are really one step closer to this being done.
Prayers for a speedy recovery.
Carol
Thank you for your responses...surgery was three and a half hours. Sitting in the hospital hooked up to I.V. And those ciculating booties. Doctor said after surgery he may want to,keep me a second night. I guess for pain, dizziness, my leukemia...and going home as a single mom with an eleven year old at home....hope not, dont much care for hospitals..on the down slide now, I hope....Jayne0 -
sounds like you are on urserenity92 said:Thank you for your
Thank you for your responses...surgery was three and a half hours. Sitting in the hospital hooked up to I.V. And those ciculating booties. Doctor said after surgery he may want to,keep me a second night. I guess for pain, dizziness, my leukemia...and going home as a single mom with an eleven year old at home....hope not, dont much care for hospitals..on the down slide now, I hope....Jayne
sounds like you are on ur way and doing pretty good. prayers are with you and ur daughter.:)0 -
Glad your surgery is overserenity92 said:Thank you for your
Thank you for your responses...surgery was three and a half hours. Sitting in the hospital hooked up to I.V. And those ciculating booties. Doctor said after surgery he may want to,keep me a second night. I guess for pain, dizziness, my leukemia...and going home as a single mom with an eleven year old at home....hope not, dont much care for hospitals..on the down slide now, I hope....Jayne
Glad your surgery is over now Jayne. Wishing you a speedy recovery! I hope there is someone that can help you when you get home to help you.
Hugs, Lex0 -
Happy to hear your surgery is complete!!!Alexis F said:Glad your surgery is over
Glad your surgery is over now Jayne. Wishing you a speedy recovery! I hope there is someone that can help you when you get home to help you.
Hugs, Lex
Praying that your recovery goes well and that you get time for R&R. Sounds like that second night is just what the doc ordered. Take advantage of "Your" time to Relax and Recoup.
My prayers are with you!!!
{{{Hugs}]}
Mitzi0 -
Home, three days in theMitzi333 said:Happy to hear your surgery is complete!!!
Praying that your recovery goes well and that you get time for R&R. Sounds like that second night is just what the doc ordered. Take advantage of "Your" time to Relax and Recoup.
My prayers are with you!!!
{{{Hugs}]}
Mitzi
Home, three days in the hospital. Thought this was the easy surgery...lol. Exhausted, sore, dizzy, eager to feel better. Scared to look, excited to look...crazy huh. Cant wait to shower tomorrow. How long before you all looked in the mirror? How long did the pain last? {my excisions extend all the way to my back on both sides now} I am scheduled to go back to work next Wednesday, does that seem reasonable? Thanks for your continued support. Hugs to all....just no bear hugs, lol. Jayne0 -
Bumping this in hopes ofserenity92 said:Home, three days in the
Home, three days in the hospital. Thought this was the easy surgery...lol. Exhausted, sore, dizzy, eager to feel better. Scared to look, excited to look...crazy huh. Cant wait to shower tomorrow. How long before you all looked in the mirror? How long did the pain last? {my excisions extend all the way to my back on both sides now} I am scheduled to go back to work next Wednesday, does that seem reasonable? Thanks for your continued support. Hugs to all....just no bear hugs, lol. Jayne
Bumping this in hopes of some feedback.......0 -
First Looksserenity92 said:Bumping this in hopes of
Bumping this in hopes of some feedback.......
The first time I looked at my new self, I did it surrounded by my mother, father, ex-husband, and sister. They allowed me to weep, but as I did so, my sister talked to me and told me that I am still beautiful and nothing will change that. She then reminded me the "we could be burying my sister now". Those words were of comfort to me. From that point on, looking at myself became easier. It is still hard sometimes, but when it gets that way, I think about that day and those words and it gives me strenght. I hope this helps.
In my prayers,
Dorene0 -
Looked when I got homeJobi said:First Looks
The first time I looked at my new self, I did it surrounded by my mother, father, ex-husband, and sister. They allowed me to weep, but as I did so, my sister talked to me and told me that I am still beautiful and nothing will change that. She then reminded me the "we could be burying my sister now". Those words were of comfort to me. From that point on, looking at myself became easier. It is still hard sometimes, but when it gets that way, I think about that day and those words and it gives me strenght. I hope this helps.
In my prayers,
Dorene
because I had special incision care to deal with. Wierd in one way but neat too to realize what they can these days. I had a latissimas flap, sounds like you did too, with a tissue expander, and will have reduction on the other side when fills are complete. Young & perky again I guess. People who haven't been through this don't completely understand do they? Best to you!0 -
I looked....wish I hadn't.
I looked....wish I hadn't. Got to take my shower yesterday, decided I needed to buck up and look. I need to keep an eye out for infections and dying skin. I had to have all my incisions cut out and redone after my mastectomy because some of the skin died. Probably because my leukemia sometimes affects how I heal. Anyhow, I gotta say I took a good look in the mirror and proceeded to bawl my eyes out. I expected bruising and swelling. But I was unprepared for the huge incisions that look like I was put together with upholstery staples. And after all those months of the expanders I expected the implants would look huge at first. Instead they look like 'boy boobs' to me. Small, funky shaped, ugly....Please someone tell me this is just temporary! For months people have made such stupid and insensitive comments about "how lucky I am that I will have pretty, perky boobs". These are not pretty! I see the surgeon on Tuesday for a follow up...I am afraid I will start crying. I am sorry I sound like such a selfish brat. I just really hoped I wouldnt look so monstrous after all this....Is this normal?Sorry for whining. Jayne0 -
My Reconstruction Experienceserenity92 said:I looked....wish I hadn't.
I looked....wish I hadn't. Got to take my shower yesterday, decided I needed to buck up and look. I need to keep an eye out for infections and dying skin. I had to have all my incisions cut out and redone after my mastectomy because some of the skin died. Probably because my leukemia sometimes affects how I heal. Anyhow, I gotta say I took a good look in the mirror and proceeded to bawl my eyes out. I expected bruising and swelling. But I was unprepared for the huge incisions that look like I was put together with upholstery staples. And after all those months of the expanders I expected the implants would look huge at first. Instead they look like 'boy boobs' to me. Small, funky shaped, ugly....Please someone tell me this is just temporary! For months people have made such stupid and insensitive comments about "how lucky I am that I will have pretty, perky boobs". These are not pretty! I see the surgeon on Tuesday for a follow up...I am afraid I will start crying. I am sorry I sound like such a selfish brat. I just really hoped I wouldnt look so monstrous after all this....Is this normal?Sorry for whining. Jayne
Hi Jayne,
Before I had my reconstruction surgery I looked at dozens of pictures online of women who had the same surgery that I did. I thought I knew what to expect and was looking forward to looking more normal again. I must say that I was not pleased at what I saw. Over the next several months I complained to my surgeon that I did not think I looked anywhere near what I expected. He always seemed to brush me off and said: 1) I had unrealistic expectations; 2) This is just how I was going to look and 3) That I would have to live with it. My general surgeon rated the job that was done as a 4 out of 10 and gave me the names of several other plastic surgeons. I consulted 3 other plastic/reconstructive surgeons. All felt the original reconstruction job was not very good and they felt they could improve upon it. I chose one of the surgeons and had revision-reconstruction surgery done. It was 4 1/2 hours under general anesthesia to fix what plastic surgeon #1 did. But what a difference! While "the girls" are not a 100% match (and never will be) they are SO much better and closer to a normal look. With the mastectomy and reconstruction I have some truly wicked scars though. I am angry that I had to undergo that much more surgery but to me it was worth it.
If after about 3 months you are still not satisfied with the way your reconstruction looks then you can always get another opinion. It takes that long for the swelling to go down and for everything to settle into its final position/shape. My revision surgery was done 6 months after the initial reconstruction. In the meantime, it IS ok to cry. It is a genuine loss when you lose what many people feel is an essential part of feeling female.
Good luck and keep us posted. We have been there.
IRENE0 -
If you are disappointed cryserenity92 said:I looked....wish I hadn't.
I looked....wish I hadn't. Got to take my shower yesterday, decided I needed to buck up and look. I need to keep an eye out for infections and dying skin. I had to have all my incisions cut out and redone after my mastectomy because some of the skin died. Probably because my leukemia sometimes affects how I heal. Anyhow, I gotta say I took a good look in the mirror and proceeded to bawl my eyes out. I expected bruising and swelling. But I was unprepared for the huge incisions that look like I was put together with upholstery staples. And after all those months of the expanders I expected the implants would look huge at first. Instead they look like 'boy boobs' to me. Small, funky shaped, ugly....Please someone tell me this is just temporary! For months people have made such stupid and insensitive comments about "how lucky I am that I will have pretty, perky boobs". These are not pretty! I see the surgeon on Tuesday for a follow up...I am afraid I will start crying. I am sorry I sound like such a selfish brat. I just really hoped I wouldnt look so monstrous after all this....Is this normal?Sorry for whining. Jayne
Sorry for your results. I regret that I did not cry when I should. Trying to be strong, a hero did not help me . I wish I showed my emotions and let my surgeon to understand the dissatisfaction in my reconstruction. There is Nothing wrong in crying at doctor,s office. of course if you can clearly articulate your concerns it will be better.
Wishing you easy healing and good visit with you PS
Hugs0 -
I'm sending you the gentlestjessiesmom1 said:Had MY Exchange Surgery in June 2011
Good luck with your exchange surgery. In my experience it was not as difficult as the mastectomy. I had a reduction/lift on the non-cancer side and my tissue expander was replaced by an implant on the same day. I came home with two drains on the reconstructed side and one drain on the reduced side. Oh joy. How I love those drains (not). It is one step on the road to your new normal. Please keep us posted.
IRENE
I'm sending you the gentlest hug today that I can Jayne!
Kylez0 -
I am so sorry youserenity92 said:I looked....wish I hadn't.
I looked....wish I hadn't. Got to take my shower yesterday, decided I needed to buck up and look. I need to keep an eye out for infections and dying skin. I had to have all my incisions cut out and redone after my mastectomy because some of the skin died. Probably because my leukemia sometimes affects how I heal. Anyhow, I gotta say I took a good look in the mirror and proceeded to bawl my eyes out. I expected bruising and swelling. But I was unprepared for the huge incisions that look like I was put together with upholstery staples. And after all those months of the expanders I expected the implants would look huge at first. Instead they look like 'boy boobs' to me. Small, funky shaped, ugly....Please someone tell me this is just temporary! For months people have made such stupid and insensitive comments about "how lucky I am that I will have pretty, perky boobs". These are not pretty! I see the surgeon on Tuesday for a follow up...I am afraid I will start crying. I am sorry I sound like such a selfish brat. I just really hoped I wouldnt look so monstrous after all this....Is this normal?Sorry for whining. Jayne
Jayne, I am so sorry you are not happy with your reconstruction however, you should be. After I had my mastectomy I cried because I looked like the bride of Frankenstein. I did research on surgeons that specialized in breast reconstruction and agumentation after breast cancer. I found Dr. Kim at Northwestern Hospital. He showed me pictures of small framed women like me before and after. He let me choose what size I wanted to be. Before cancer I was a b cup so I told him a c cup. He said it wasn't measured in cup size but I would be happy. He explained after all I went through, I should and would be happy with my new breast. The incision marks are ugly but they do tone down after awhile with the help of shea butter and cocoa butter. However, it still looks better than no breast that look like a science experiment gone bad, and besides, I am alive. Perhaps, you should get a second opinion. I hope everything works out for you.
Ballerina0 -
I am very sorry Jayne thatjessiesmom1 said:My Reconstruction Experience
Hi Jayne,
Before I had my reconstruction surgery I looked at dozens of pictures online of women who had the same surgery that I did. I thought I knew what to expect and was looking forward to looking more normal again. I must say that I was not pleased at what I saw. Over the next several months I complained to my surgeon that I did not think I looked anywhere near what I expected. He always seemed to brush me off and said: 1) I had unrealistic expectations; 2) This is just how I was going to look and 3) That I would have to live with it. My general surgeon rated the job that was done as a 4 out of 10 and gave me the names of several other plastic surgeons. I consulted 3 other plastic/reconstructive surgeons. All felt the original reconstruction job was not very good and they felt they could improve upon it. I chose one of the surgeons and had revision-reconstruction surgery done. It was 4 1/2 hours under general anesthesia to fix what plastic surgeon #1 did. But what a difference! While "the girls" are not a 100% match (and never will be) they are SO much better and closer to a normal look. With the mastectomy and reconstruction I have some truly wicked scars though. I am angry that I had to undergo that much more surgery but to me it was worth it.
If after about 3 months you are still not satisfied with the way your reconstruction looks then you can always get another opinion. It takes that long for the swelling to go down and for everything to settle into its final position/shape. My revision surgery was done 6 months after the initial reconstruction. In the meantime, it IS ok to cry. It is a genuine loss when you lose what many people feel is an essential part of feeling female.
Good luck and keep us posted. We have been there.
IRENE
I am very sorry Jayne that you aren't happy with your reconstruction. I wish I could do more than just send you a big cyber hug.
Lex0 -
Patienceserenity92 said:I looked....wish I hadn't.
I looked....wish I hadn't. Got to take my shower yesterday, decided I needed to buck up and look. I need to keep an eye out for infections and dying skin. I had to have all my incisions cut out and redone after my mastectomy because some of the skin died. Probably because my leukemia sometimes affects how I heal. Anyhow, I gotta say I took a good look in the mirror and proceeded to bawl my eyes out. I expected bruising and swelling. But I was unprepared for the huge incisions that look like I was put together with upholstery staples. And after all those months of the expanders I expected the implants would look huge at first. Instead they look like 'boy boobs' to me. Small, funky shaped, ugly....Please someone tell me this is just temporary! For months people have made such stupid and insensitive comments about "how lucky I am that I will have pretty, perky boobs". These are not pretty! I see the surgeon on Tuesday for a follow up...I am afraid I will start crying. I am sorry I sound like such a selfish brat. I just really hoped I wouldnt look so monstrous after all this....Is this normal?Sorry for whining. Jayne
Jayne,
Your body just went through major surgery don't forget to let it heal before you judge yourself. I'm sure you are swollen and not fully recovered. Give yourself time. I didn't have reconstruction but my scars took time to lighten. You can whine this is the place to do it, vent all you want. Be patient, you may see a difference in a few weeks.
((((hugs))))
Terry0
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