It didn't really hit me until today. Took mom who is 70 to chemo yesterday. She was on round 6 of how many we dont know. This is the 2nd time she has gone through chemo. First set of chemo she struggled(almost anaphalyxis state) with the taxol so they give it to her really slow takes about 4 hours to get it in her. So this time around they give it slow again well yesterday she began having a reaction to the carbo. It kills me to see her get these drugs into her body and now not tollerate them. What would the next option be no more chemo and just watch her die. She has the best attitude ever but i however can't stop crying. I no longer sleep listening for her or my father who is also not in the best of health. I work to support them financially as they are both on a fixed income. I don't have a high paying job at all and her bills are piling up. Just having the moment of helplessness.