thanks again every one for the thoughts and prayers!
sue5749
Member Posts: 170
Been at the hospitol all day, husbands brother and sister-in-law were there when I came home, so was his daughter. I had a very hard day! Husbands cancer doctor said there is nothing more to do nothing else can be done. He has blood clots in both of his veins on each side of his neck. And he face is all swollen up. They did try blood thinners yesterday, but stopped them because he started throwing up. His doctor said maybe we should try Hospice? Don't know anything about Hospice, didn't even want to hear that word because I felt that there was nothing more to do to help him. I am so very sad, can hardly type, without making a thousand mistakes, don't know what to do? He cannot talk I bought him a board to right on, but he still doesn't write anything. They have him on pain patch. I'm scared. The lady did come in his room today to discuss Hospice she seemed really nice, but Hospice? Oh my, I feel like there is no hope. Has anybody on this site heard of those 2 veins clogging up? He started throwing up last Wed, was suppose to have cemo treatment but his white blood count was to high she said to take him to er so that is when everything started, was dehydrated and then everything went down heal that fast? Has anybody out ever heard of anyone that has their face swell up and the 2 veins on their neck get clogged up in just 2 days? That fast?? I NEVER! So please if anybody out there has ever heard of this happening to someone please let me know. Help please. I just don't know what to do. I know we all have to go some day but we are really never ready! I scared and i know my husband must be really scared and there is nothing I can do but say I LOVE YOU and hold his hand. I feel so helpless. Everyone says he is looking better, maybe to them he is, anymore there has been more bad days then good ones for him. I have had to bury both my mom and dad never my child and maybe I won't have to bury my husband maybe there is mericials can't spell anymore. I just know the people of this site know better then anybody the feeling that I am feeling is the only reason I can kinda talk and know you all understand. My sister said this morning Sue, just don't know how you are doing it all? I said Beth, you just got to do what you have to do. She said well,,, I know Bill wouldn't have taken me to my treatments if it where me he would have said sorry you are on your own . Never never could think that way I couldn't like with myself. My gosh me and my husband been together for 30 years must of them good, but some bad just like everything else is this life, we held on and I guess that is what it is all about in the end just hold on tight. Thanks for listnigh i cant spell so sorry 'God bless each and every one of you on the site! I have been on here for 1 year today. Last Nov he found out he had supragottic cancer form smoking not drinking but smoking does not smoke now but his 2 kids do. They have to watch his Dad not eat or drink his favorite cup of coffee or eat fried potatoes with onios that he loved and talking to friends and family on the phone nothing, but so said that they can'tgive up the smokes, not saying hey will get this type of cancer but quit if you can the more good you do for you body the more good your body will do thinks for you
SUE
SUE
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Comments
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thanks so much!!!!Crazymom said:Praying
keep praying...he listens. It may or may not be timefor him to go. Only God knows.
I am praying for you.
Ann
Husband is home from hospitol, the doctors wanted him to go into hospitol but he isn't going for that so a nurse is coming in the morning at 8 for some iv infusions. Nothing more to do. Like you said only God knows. Again thanks so much for all the prayers and kind words! There are so many caring people out there! This site has really helped me so very much! Also Michael Bolton!0 -
So Know the Feeling
Sue:
I'm so sorry to hear about hubby's condition. I so know how you are feeling and it is so tough. Charlie and I were married 35 years and together 2 years before that. When he was diagnosed in Nov. '08 things turned well was doing so well after treatment and then in July 2010 - boom! Came back with avegence and then passed away on Aug. 21 2010. My life will never be the same - it is different. I still have my moments. We were so connected. He was a smoker and a former drinker but quit drinking in 1997. He was such a fighter and I always told him "I wish this were me instead of you" and he always said, "Well I don't wish it were you instead of me!" But it's hard being without him. I know I will never get over losing him, but his wishes were to be cremated and he now sits on the entertainment center. Maybe it sounds a little quirky but it is comforting to me to see that urn up there. Right now he's dressed up in his "Christmas basket!" Anyway, you are right, you are right, you do what you have to do and I feel sorry for your sister if she truly thinks if this were her; her husband would not take her to her treatments and tell her she's on her own! I was there with Charlie for every chemo and some rads (most I wasn't as I was working and he could drive himself back and forth - but I wanted to be there!) Please let me know if you want to talk or PM me and I'll give you my info if you like. You will get through this although I know you don't know how right now. My thoughts and prayers are with you and as Jimmy "V" (former bb coach at NC state that passed away from cancer) says, "Never give up!" There is always hope. In my prayers continously!
Jan (Basketcase)0 -
hospice
I know hearing the word hospice seems like there is no hope but, I just want to tell you that I have been very connected to Hospice and it's a wonderful thing. Yes, they are there for a terminal illness but nobody knows how long that will be. Someone can have hospice care for even years! They deliver palliative care which is aimed at your husband, YOU, and your family.
I am in a support group for caregivers and it is led by the counselor from Hospice. At first, that made me feel like I was inviting defeat but, I came to realize it is a great resource...both physically and mentally.
My heart goes out to you during this difficult pain. My husband, Andy, and I have been married 31 years and he is the love of my life so, I can only imagine how you feel.
Hope your situation takes a turn for the best,
Robin0 -
trying timesrobinleigh said:hospice
I know hearing the word hospice seems like there is no hope but, I just want to tell you that I have been very connected to Hospice and it's a wonderful thing. Yes, they are there for a terminal illness but nobody knows how long that will be. Someone can have hospice care for even years! They deliver palliative care which is aimed at your husband, YOU, and your family.
I am in a support group for caregivers and it is led by the counselor from Hospice. At first, that made me feel like I was inviting defeat but, I came to realize it is a great resource...both physically and mentally.
My heart goes out to you during this difficult pain. My husband, Andy, and I have been married 31 years and he is the love of my life so, I can only imagine how you feel.
Hope your situation takes a turn for the best,
Robin
My husband said that he does not want to be cremated. He just got out of the hospitol last nite. Had to go to pick up the NEW meds that the doctor ordered. He has a hole box full. The nurse came out this morning to show me how to give him is antibiotics thrue his port. So I will be doing that at 4. Just got through giving him his can of jevity and cleaning around his peg tube. He has lost his voice. Bought him a boogie board online, so if he wants something I would know what he needs. There is just so much that I have to write down, all the different meds and the times. My husband and I have been married 25 years and lived together for 4 so almost 30 this September. The nurse just called and they are going to switch one of his meeds. I have to right every little detail down or I know for sure that I would forget it. So have to get off here and do some writing, Thanks again for everyone prayers!!!!!!! Sue0 -
Continued....sue5749 said:trying times
My husband said that he does not want to be cremated. He just got out of the hospitol last nite. Had to go to pick up the NEW meds that the doctor ordered. He has a hole box full. The nurse came out this morning to show me how to give him is antibiotics thrue his port. So I will be doing that at 4. Just got through giving him his can of jevity and cleaning around his peg tube. He has lost his voice. Bought him a boogie board online, so if he wants something I would know what he needs. There is just so much that I have to write down, all the different meds and the times. My husband and I have been married 25 years and lived together for 4 so almost 30 this September. The nurse just called and they are going to switch one of his meeds. I have to right every little detail down or I know for sure that I would forget it. So have to get off here and do some writing, Thanks again for everyone prayers!!!!!!! Sue
Mine will continue for you and yours....
John0
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