Sad please anyone help me...

AnneBehymer

teenadee said:

Hello
Don't ever feel scared to share your good news with me as true friends are thankful and grateful of such news and not for a minute did I think well why not my mom. I want you 100% healthy and you have been through very much and I know you will enjoy every minute now.

Good day Anne write you soon

thrid time is a charm
Ok I have tried to send this two time before but when I woke put the second time while trying to send this I deceided to get some sleep. thank you so much for your kind words I hope your day went well tomorrow is my eight hour chemo day you may not hear much from me for about a week. The chemo can knock me on my butt so some time my friends do not hear from me for about a week so don't worry if you don't hear from me. My mom has a list of people that I want her to contact incase I pass away you are now on that list. She will conctact you if I end up in the hospital or if I pass. I will talk with you later.


Much love,
Anne

AnneBehymer

teenadee said:

Hospice
Alexandria, I am at my desk right now saying prayers. I said them last night and I will say them always for you and your family. I can't imagine how hard today will be with the doctor saying 'hospice', just thinking about it makes me sick myself (big help I am). Please let me know how it goes. Your other sister is stage II and the treatment is working this is promising news. I can't understand either this disease, a friend of mine asked me when I first found out about my mom, isnt' it better you know her illness than her just passing from heart failure or something. I don't particularly opt for either but the suffering is just unbearable. I wonder if anyone reads what I write and thinks 'well try doing the treatment yourself' and talk about unbearable. I hope not because I truly empathize with what a cancer patient is going through, all the poison to kill the poison, the constant needles, the constant feeling of being sick, I see it daily and just don't get it. I don't think we will ever make sense of it ever. Today my mom is not feeling good, she's quite sick can't keep food down and has an awful cough. Her body hurts much so she is taking more of the Dilaudid till we see the next steps. Thank you for asking. xox

from at least me I would
from at least me I would never say have chemo and then get back to me on how it feel. You don't have cancer but you a living it through your mom. You know what she goes through the pain it causes and how it wears on your body. I will contnue to pray for your mom and you and your dad. It is a long rouad to walk but it will bring you closer to you I am sorry but I am having problems typing and staying focused because of all the pain medicatin I am on so if you don't understand something I said it is because I am high as a kite lol legally. My world has been spinning today lol. Stop stying to make sense of this beast you never will.

Lots of love
Anne

AnneBehymer

bubblegumx3 said:

cry for my mom as well
i'm 20 and my mom has stage 4 primary liver cancer. doctors told us yesterday that she may not make the night and is on her last days. i'm happy that you and your mom atleast had 20 more years than i did. All i wanted was for my mom to watch me gradate college, rate my boyfriends, watch me get married and be a grandma to my children. i guess that was too much to hope for. i dont know how im going to cope with this. stay strong, because there are many people who are going through similar situations as you are.

bubblegum
You will be in my prays it does seem unfair why some servive this beast and some don't. I will keep you all in my prays as this seems like an unfair thing.


Anne

alexandria54

teenadee said:

Hospice
Alexandria, I am at my desk right now saying prayers. I said them last night and I will say them always for you and your family. I can't imagine how hard today will be with the doctor saying 'hospice', just thinking about it makes me sick myself (big help I am). Please let me know how it goes. Your other sister is stage II and the treatment is working this is promising news. I can't understand either this disease, a friend of mine asked me when I first found out about my mom, isnt' it better you know her illness than her just passing from heart failure or something. I don't particularly opt for either but the suffering is just unbearable. I wonder if anyone reads what I write and thinks 'well try doing the treatment yourself' and talk about unbearable. I hope not because I truly empathize with what a cancer patient is going through, all the poison to kill the poison, the constant needles, the constant feeling of being sick, I see it daily and just don't get it. I don't think we will ever make sense of it ever. Today my mom is not feeling good, she's quite sick can't keep food down and has an awful cough. Her body hurts much so she is taking more of the Dilaudid till we see the next steps. Thank you for asking. xox

teena, I hope no one reads
teena, I hope no one reads and thinks that we are thinking we have it worse than anyone who actually has cancer. I know that everyday but every single person on this site is in their own hell. Let's just call it what it is. I have learned that I am not as brave as I thought I was. I had to cancel my sister's radiation this morning cause she couldn't make it and then I was making her coffee and I watched her lose balance and fall down and hit her her onthe table. She also broke one of the tumors that is protruding from her emaciated body. I became hysterical and have been all day. She is in the hospital tonight for a couple of nights while we are lining up hospice and my eyes are bulging out of my head from crying. Not because of hospice but because I was so severely traumatized by watching her fall. I posted here earlier and it did not go through which is just as well cause I was beside myself at the time. Because of her head injury everything is difficult beyond the norm and in the hospital all she kept asking was "when can I go home?" I always let caregivers know about her brain condition. When she is healthy she is perfectly capable of living independently but now we'll see what is next. Please know that when I say I cannot bring her to my house to die that I do so with so much pain. It just cannot be. I am not strong enough to a) watch it and b) have her be mean to me. I am a little bit ashamed of that but it is the truth. We will see what hospice says. Sometimes our tears and our pain goes in cycles and today unfortunately it is all about me. I know everyone on here is suffering somehow but I can only help myself right now. Having said that, I will have you and Anne in my prayers. Hey Anne, can I have some of your pain medicine? I'll try anything! God bless survivors, caregivers, families and the ones still fighting. After all this I realize that bucket lists and tearful coherent goodbyes are mostly from Hollywood. God bless us all. much love. By the way, my name is Nadine and I live in Oregon. Alexandria is my middle name and I just used it as a sign on as I sometimes do on sites. xoxoxox

teenadee

alexandria54 said:

teena, I hope no one reads
teena, I hope no one reads and thinks that we are thinking we have it worse than anyone who actually has cancer. I know that everyday but every single person on this site is in their own hell. Let's just call it what it is. I have learned that I am not as brave as I thought I was. I had to cancel my sister's radiation this morning cause she couldn't make it and then I was making her coffee and I watched her lose balance and fall down and hit her her onthe table. She also broke one of the tumors that is protruding from her emaciated body. I became hysterical and have been all day. She is in the hospital tonight for a couple of nights while we are lining up hospice and my eyes are bulging out of my head from crying. Not because of hospice but because I was so severely traumatized by watching her fall. I posted here earlier and it did not go through which is just as well cause I was beside myself at the time. Because of her head injury everything is difficult beyond the norm and in the hospital all she kept asking was "when can I go home?" I always let caregivers know about her brain condition. When she is healthy she is perfectly capable of living independently but now we'll see what is next. Please know that when I say I cannot bring her to my house to die that I do so with so much pain. It just cannot be. I am not strong enough to a) watch it and b) have her be mean to me. I am a little bit ashamed of that but it is the truth. We will see what hospice says. Sometimes our tears and our pain goes in cycles and today unfortunately it is all about me. I know everyone on here is suffering somehow but I can only help myself right now. Having said that, I will have you and Anne in my prayers. Hey Anne, can I have some of your pain medicine? I'll try anything! God bless survivors, caregivers, families and the ones still fighting. After all this I realize that bucket lists and tearful coherent goodbyes are mostly from Hollywood. God bless us all. much love. By the way, my name is Nadine and I live in Oregon. Alexandria is my middle name and I just used it as a sign on as I sometimes do on sites. xoxoxox

God bless
Nadine, I just read your comment and I am balling for you!! I cannot believe this is happening to you and your family. Your sister dear lord why does she have to suffer this much of course you are traumatized who wouldn't be. I am picturing it and have shivers. I know you don't want to take your sister to your house to pass away, I would not be able to do it either. I feel for you so much. Do not feel ashamed OK!! This is just awful and wish we could meet in person to comfort each other but you have done so much for me already. You, Anne and this site have helped me cope more than I thought I could. I still have anxiety and cry but I feel now I can talk to you through the site. Your sister is now in the hospital for the fall, is she ok - I mean I know she's not but is she ok from the fall. You know when you say you don't want her to be mean to you, I know exactly what you feel because sometimes when my mom is going through insane pain and can't take it no more she will do and say things I know she doesn't mean but she says it and it does hurt. You are a good sister Nadine, not many stick by their family like you do, like I do so we are good people and we pray for everyone with Cancer. I hope you are doing a bit better now and I hope you have your family close to you now, your husband and children. I am sending you as much positive energy as I can send and know that I am here for you. My name is Tina and I'm from Montreal, Canada. You have a beautiful name Nadine Alexandria

AnneBehymer

alexandria54 said:

teena, I hope no one reads
teena, I hope no one reads and thinks that we are thinking we have it worse than anyone who actually has cancer. I know that everyday but every single person on this site is in their own hell. Let's just call it what it is. I have learned that I am not as brave as I thought I was. I had to cancel my sister's radiation this morning cause she couldn't make it and then I was making her coffee and I watched her lose balance and fall down and hit her her onthe table. She also broke one of the tumors that is protruding from her emaciated body. I became hysterical and have been all day. She is in the hospital tonight for a couple of nights while we are lining up hospice and my eyes are bulging out of my head from crying. Not because of hospice but because I was so severely traumatized by watching her fall. I posted here earlier and it did not go through which is just as well cause I was beside myself at the time. Because of her head injury everything is difficult beyond the norm and in the hospital all she kept asking was "when can I go home?" I always let caregivers know about her brain condition. When she is healthy she is perfectly capable of living independently but now we'll see what is next. Please know that when I say I cannot bring her to my house to die that I do so with so much pain. It just cannot be. I am not strong enough to a) watch it and b) have her be mean to me. I am a little bit ashamed of that but it is the truth. We will see what hospice says. Sometimes our tears and our pain goes in cycles and today unfortunately it is all about me. I know everyone on here is suffering somehow but I can only help myself right now. Having said that, I will have you and Anne in my prayers. Hey Anne, can I have some of your pain medicine? I'll try anything! God bless survivors, caregivers, families and the ones still fighting. After all this I realize that bucket lists and tearful coherent goodbyes are mostly from Hollywood. God bless us all. much love. By the way, my name is Nadine and I live in Oregon. Alexandria is my middle name and I just used it as a sign on as I sometimes do on sites. xoxoxox

Some times it has to be all about YOU
So you can come back and and be the best sister like you know you can be. Shame on anything who could make you feel less of that. When a caregiver is there all the time and does not take care of her self some so times it will cause them to break down and who would not lose it when they see someone the love with all their heart fall and hurt themselt that bad. Nadine (oh by the way may name is Phyllis I use my middle name also)don't let them get you down and I am sorry they have made you feel that way I have seen the real you and I know you love your sister with all you heart. You can email me at my home email when you need to talk it is annebehymer@cox.net.

Anne

Sending you hugs have a good night and get some rest

AnneBehymer

teenadee said:

God bless
Nadine, I just read your comment and I am balling for you!! I cannot believe this is happening to you and your family. Your sister dear lord why does she have to suffer this much of course you are traumatized who wouldn't be. I am picturing it and have shivers. I know you don't want to take your sister to your house to pass away, I would not be able to do it either. I feel for you so much. Do not feel ashamed OK!! This is just awful and wish we could meet in person to comfort each other but you have done so much for me already. You, Anne and this site have helped me cope more than I thought I could. I still have anxiety and cry but I feel now I can talk to you through the site. Your sister is now in the hospital for the fall, is she ok - I mean I know she's not but is she ok from the fall. You know when you say you don't want her to be mean to you, I know exactly what you feel because sometimes when my mom is going through insane pain and can't take it no more she will do and say things I know she doesn't mean but she says it and it does hurt. You are a good sister Nadine, not many stick by their family like you do, like I do so we are good people and we pray for everyone with Cancer. I hope you are doing a bit better now and I hope you have your family close to you now, your husband and children. I am sending you as much positive energy as I can send and know that I am here for you. My name is Tina and I'm from Montreal, Canada. You have a beautiful name Nadine Alexandria

we are all here to support each other
and not hear to put each other down. Nadine and Alexandria people with cancer when in so much pain sometimes will miss place our anger and it hits the people we love because we know at the end of the day you will still love us. Add a brain trama to the mix and hit is even harder not to do miss place your anger I love you both and know you are doing your best. I came home from chemo and passed out from not getting sleep last night and I will be going to bed again real soon just know how much I am hear for you and that you are doing the best you can and you are doing a great job.

Anne


Oh by the way just to cheer you up. I found out what my ca125 was today our normal ca125 which is how we track cancer for women if they have camcer tumers is 0-21 when I found out I had ovarian cancer mine was at 2000. After four treatments only mine is down to 5 hoping next treatment it is down to 0. I am at the top of my class in the trial only took getting cancer to make me top of the class.

teenadee

AnneBehymer said:

thrid time is a charm
Ok I have tried to send this two time before but when I woke put the second time while trying to send this I deceided to get some sleep. thank you so much for your kind words I hope your day went well tomorrow is my eight hour chemo day you may not hear much from me for about a week. The chemo can knock me on my butt so some time my friends do not hear from me for about a week so don't worry if you don't hear from me. My mom has a list of people that I want her to contact incase I pass away you are now on that list. She will conctact you if I end up in the hospital or if I pass. I will talk with you later.


Much love,
Anne

No talk like that now...
I always want to be contacted by my dear friend Anne OK. I know you are not feeling well today and do not worry about writing, know I am thinking about you/praying for you's and right now you have to rest and take the best care of yourself. We will touch base when you are feeling up to it. xoxo

teenadee

AnneBehymer said:

we are all here to support each other
and not hear to put each other down. Nadine and Alexandria people with cancer when in so much pain sometimes will miss place our anger and it hits the people we love because we know at the end of the day you will still love us. Add a brain trama to the mix and hit is even harder not to do miss place your anger I love you both and know you are doing your best. I came home from chemo and passed out from not getting sleep last night and I will be going to bed again real soon just know how much I am hear for you and that you are doing the best you can and you are doing a great job.

Anne


Oh by the way just to cheer you up. I found out what my ca125 was today our normal ca125 which is how we track cancer for women if they have camcer tumers is 0-21 when I found out I had ovarian cancer mine was at 2000. After four treatments only mine is down to 5 hoping next treatment it is down to 0. I am at the top of my class in the trial only took getting cancer to make me top of the class.

this is the best!!!
your count and you! love you! rest now ok

teenadee

AnneBehymer said:

we are all here to support each other
and not hear to put each other down. Nadine and Alexandria people with cancer when in so much pain sometimes will miss place our anger and it hits the people we love because we know at the end of the day you will still love us. Add a brain trama to the mix and hit is even harder not to do miss place your anger I love you both and know you are doing your best. I came home from chemo and passed out from not getting sleep last night and I will be going to bed again real soon just know how much I am hear for you and that you are doing the best you can and you are doing a great job.

Anne


Oh by the way just to cheer you up. I found out what my ca125 was today our normal ca125 which is how we track cancer for women if they have camcer tumers is 0-21 when I found out I had ovarian cancer mine was at 2000. After four treatments only mine is down to 5 hoping next treatment it is down to 0. I am at the top of my class in the trial only took getting cancer to make me top of the class.

this is the best!!!
your count and you! love you! rest now ok

alexandria54

AnneBehymer said:

Some times it has to be all about YOU
So you can come back and and be the best sister like you know you can be. Shame on anything who could make you feel less of that. When a caregiver is there all the time and does not take care of her self some so times it will cause them to break down and who would not lose it when they see someone the love with all their heart fall and hurt themselt that bad. Nadine (oh by the way may name is Phyllis I use my middle name also)don't let them get you down and I am sorry they have made you feel that way I have seen the real you and I know you love your sister with all you heart. You can email me at my home email when you need to talk it is annebehymer@cox.net.

Anne

Sending you hugs have a good night and get some rest

Thank you so much Phyllis. I
Thank you so much Phyllis. I am trying so hard to not lose my mind. May I please emphasize here that my situation is different because of her head injury. She will not make decisions to sign anything. Advanced Directive, hospice enrollment, home nursing help. Everything has to be mulled over and there is no making her do anything. And believe me when I tell you, that's just the half of it. So I have to do the best I can and if she falls down she falls down. I can't be there 100 percent of the time and coming to terms with all this is a ****. I did realize yesterday though, my biggest obstacle is my fear. Imagine someone was trying to drag you INTO a burning building. You would be kicking and screaming and crying and dragging your feet and that's how I feel. Watching this, and doing this, awful. It is quite strange to think of myself as a competent person and one who gets things done and now I am almost paralyzed. At some point I have to Let Go and Let God.
I am so happy for your news Anne. Keep on fighting the good fight. Your attitude is superb and I really mean that. I may take you up on the private email and right now I have to get to work. Going to go and try to feel like a normal person.
love, Nadine

teenadee

alexandria54 said:

Thank you so much Phyllis. I
Thank you so much Phyllis. I am trying so hard to not lose my mind. May I please emphasize here that my situation is different because of her head injury. She will not make decisions to sign anything. Advanced Directive, hospice enrollment, home nursing help. Everything has to be mulled over and there is no making her do anything. And believe me when I tell you, that's just the half of it. So I have to do the best I can and if she falls down she falls down. I can't be there 100 percent of the time and coming to terms with all this is a ****. I did realize yesterday though, my biggest obstacle is my fear. Imagine someone was trying to drag you INTO a burning building. You would be kicking and screaming and crying and dragging your feet and that's how I feel. Watching this, and doing this, awful. It is quite strange to think of myself as a competent person and one who gets things done and now I am almost paralyzed. At some point I have to Let Go and Let God.
I am so happy for your news Anne. Keep on fighting the good fight. Your attitude is superb and I really mean that. I may take you up on the private email and right now I have to get to work. Going to go and try to feel like a normal person.
love, Nadine

Hello
I am so glad you wrote as I was very worried about you. I just wanted to let you know that Phyllis Anne told me to tell you that she is ok and that after her 8 hour Chemo she rests very much so she may not be able to respond on the site. I am sorry Nadine that you are going through all of this, I know I'm a broken record but I just cannot understand why people need to suffer so damn much. Are you your sisters legal guardian? Does she still make her own choices concerning treatments and things? The hospice for her is the end so I can't imagine how she's coping either and the head injury my god I just don't know what to say. I am sorry and all I can do is ask God to help you more and more and to try to help your sister get somehow at peace. I gave up trying to be normal months ago. I am in this crazy little world in my head and can't snap out of it. love Tina

AnneBehymer

alexandria54 said:

Thank you so much Phyllis. I
Thank you so much Phyllis. I am trying so hard to not lose my mind. May I please emphasize here that my situation is different because of her head injury. She will not make decisions to sign anything. Advanced Directive, hospice enrollment, home nursing help. Everything has to be mulled over and there is no making her do anything. And believe me when I tell you, that's just the half of it. So I have to do the best I can and if she falls down she falls down. I can't be there 100 percent of the time and coming to terms with all this is a ****. I did realize yesterday though, my biggest obstacle is my fear. Imagine someone was trying to drag you INTO a burning building. You would be kicking and screaming and crying and dragging your feet and that's how I feel. Watching this, and doing this, awful. It is quite strange to think of myself as a competent person and one who gets things done and now I am almost paralyzed. At some point I have to Let Go and Let God.
I am so happy for your news Anne. Keep on fighting the good fight. Your attitude is superb and I really mean that. I may take you up on the private email and right now I have to get to work. Going to go and try to feel like a normal person.
love, Nadine

Let go and Let God
You said a mouth full right there and that is sometimes all we can do is let go and let God becuase we can not handle it on our own. Have you thought about having your sister declared incompetent I do not know if your state allows it but it sounds like from her brain injury she is not longer able to make wise deceicetions for herself you should look into getting a lawer because trying to do this on your own could be more trouble. I don't ever like telling someone to do this to a family member but it looks like that is your only hope. I will be praying for you and your family please keep in contact with me I may not answer right back because the week after chemo is so hard for me but I will do my best to answer you. Take care my dear friend I am here if you need me.


Anne

teenadee

alexandria54 said:

Thank you so much Phyllis. I
Thank you so much Phyllis. I am trying so hard to not lose my mind. May I please emphasize here that my situation is different because of her head injury. She will not make decisions to sign anything. Advanced Directive, hospice enrollment, home nursing help. Everything has to be mulled over and there is no making her do anything. And believe me when I tell you, that's just the half of it. So I have to do the best I can and if she falls down she falls down. I can't be there 100 percent of the time and coming to terms with all this is a ****. I did realize yesterday though, my biggest obstacle is my fear. Imagine someone was trying to drag you INTO a burning building. You would be kicking and screaming and crying and dragging your feet and that's how I feel. Watching this, and doing this, awful. It is quite strange to think of myself as a competent person and one who gets things done and now I am almost paralyzed. At some point I have to Let Go and Let God.
I am so happy for your news Anne. Keep on fighting the good fight. Your attitude is superb and I really mean that. I may take you up on the private email and right now I have to get to work. Going to go and try to feel like a normal person.
love, Nadine

are you ok Nadine
Hi Nadine,

I haven't heard from you in a long time and I'm worried. Are you doing ok? How are your sisters? Please if you have a minute, let me know how you're doing. xox

alexandria54

teenadee said:

are you ok Nadine
Hi Nadine,

I haven't heard from you in a long time and I'm worried. Are you doing ok? How are your sisters? Please if you have a minute, let me know how you're doing. xox

Teena, thank you for asking
Teena, thank you for asking about me. I have had a couple of emails with Phyllis over the last week but have been too busy for much more. As of last thursday my sister is in the hospital waiting to be placed somewhere inpatient for the duration. She kept falling down and no matter what we did we couldn't stop it. I had to spend the night at her apartment with her on Wednesday and it was a house of horrors. Her head injury makes everything 10 times more difficult cause she is crazy. She won't let you help her walk but she'll sure let you help her up when she falls down. I couldn't watch it anymore and I called the social worker and said "I am not asking, I'm begging, for help." I told them that I could not spend another night in her apartment and that I thought I was actually going to have a heart attack. People came on board and now she is in the hospital waiting for placement. I had immediate relief knowing she would be safe but that didn't last cause now I am obsessed with it. My other sister (the one on chemo) and I can think of nothing else. It has us in its grip and it is making it hard to function. I am sad, mad, guilty, just plain consumed. When she got to the hospital and they washed her and hydrated her and got her meds in order she actually perked up a little and the sick thing, please forgive me, is I didn't want her to perk up. For anyone reading this please don't think I don't respect human life. If you could walk in my shoes for a day or week you would understand my thinking. Today, I will go to sit with her at the hospital for the whole afternoon again but you cannot have normal discourse with her. She is just so difficult. And when she is not difficult she is just random. The agency that is getting her on medicaid is coming to the hospital tomorrow to evaluate her and decide where to place her. I want her to go to hospice but they are saying they may temporarily put her in adult foster care. I was up half the night last night agonizing over this. I am praying so hard that she just gets put in the facility where I think she belongs. Then I realize that I have to accept that I begged them for help and they are helping and I cannot question the manner in which they are providing that help. Oh Tina! Thank you for letting me vomit this all over the place. My family is in a tailspin. I'm worried about my other sister getting sick while on chemo and the effect that will have. I need to lay down my burden. I need to find a way to put it in God's hands. I'm trying but it is so hard. And believe me, I have total faith in the fact that I have done everything a sister can. I hope you are okay Tina. Get back to me when you can. Love, Nadine

alexandria54

alexandria54 said:

Teena, thank you for asking
Teena, thank you for asking about me. I have had a couple of emails with Phyllis over the last week but have been too busy for much more. As of last thursday my sister is in the hospital waiting to be placed somewhere inpatient for the duration. She kept falling down and no matter what we did we couldn't stop it. I had to spend the night at her apartment with her on Wednesday and it was a house of horrors. Her head injury makes everything 10 times more difficult cause she is crazy. She won't let you help her walk but she'll sure let you help her up when she falls down. I couldn't watch it anymore and I called the social worker and said "I am not asking, I'm begging, for help." I told them that I could not spend another night in her apartment and that I thought I was actually going to have a heart attack. People came on board and now she is in the hospital waiting for placement. I had immediate relief knowing she would be safe but that didn't last cause now I am obsessed with it. My other sister (the one on chemo) and I can think of nothing else. It has us in its grip and it is making it hard to function. I am sad, mad, guilty, just plain consumed. When she got to the hospital and they washed her and hydrated her and got her meds in order she actually perked up a little and the sick thing, please forgive me, is I didn't want her to perk up. For anyone reading this please don't think I don't respect human life. If you could walk in my shoes for a day or week you would understand my thinking. Today, I will go to sit with her at the hospital for the whole afternoon again but you cannot have normal discourse with her. She is just so difficult. And when she is not difficult she is just random. The agency that is getting her on medicaid is coming to the hospital tomorrow to evaluate her and decide where to place her. I want her to go to hospice but they are saying they may temporarily put her in adult foster care. I was up half the night last night agonizing over this. I am praying so hard that she just gets put in the facility where I think she belongs. Then I realize that I have to accept that I begged them for help and they are helping and I cannot question the manner in which they are providing that help. Oh Tina! Thank you for letting me vomit this all over the place. My family is in a tailspin. I'm worried about my other sister getting sick while on chemo and the effect that will have. I need to lay down my burden. I need to find a way to put it in God's hands. I'm trying but it is so hard. And believe me, I have total faith in the fact that I have done everything a sister can. I hope you are okay Tina. Get back to me when you can. Love, Nadine

Tina, I just wanted you to
Tina, I just wanted you to know that I had a good day with my sister today and have found some equilibrium tonight. I am going to cook my husband a nice dinner which I haven't done in quite some time. Poor thing is living like a bachelor. I am calm and will find out tomorrow where they think she should be placed. Please pray for us that it is the inpatient hospice and not an adult foster home. I don't usually pray for things but I am praying for this result so hard. Please join me. I hope you are okay my dear. I'm sorry to burden you. Please tell me about what's going on with you. xoxox

teenadee

alexandria54 said:

Tina, I just wanted you to
Tina, I just wanted you to know that I had a good day with my sister today and have found some equilibrium tonight. I am going to cook my husband a nice dinner which I haven't done in quite some time. Poor thing is living like a bachelor. I am calm and will find out tomorrow where they think she should be placed. Please pray for us that it is the inpatient hospice and not an adult foster home. I don't usually pray for things but I am praying for this result so hard. Please join me. I hope you are okay my dear. I'm sorry to burden you. Please tell me about what's going on with you. xoxox

praying hard
Did you find out yet where your sister will be going? I have been praying for you and your family every night. I am relieved that you have found some calmness to this nightmare as I was so worried about you. I am doing ok alittle sick got pneumonia but i'm better now. I was calm for the past week but it's acting up again the anxiety and frightness for my mom. I hope you and your husband had a nice dinner. I send you strength and love.

alexandria54

teenadee said:

praying hard
Did you find out yet where your sister will be going? I have been praying for you and your family every night. I am relieved that you have found some calmness to this nightmare as I was so worried about you. I am doing ok alittle sick got pneumonia but i'm better now. I was calm for the past week but it's acting up again the anxiety and frightness for my mom. I hope you and your husband had a nice dinner. I send you strength and love.

Tina, to think of Anne
Tina, to think of Anne worried about us makes me cry. I will be praying so hard for you and her tonight. They are moving my sister to an assisted living studio. I don't know how long that will last but I'm glad it's not Adult Foster Care. No offense to anyone but with her head injury she must have privacy and a remote for the t.v.. We will see how it goes and I have put everything into the caregivers/social workers hands. They were so there when I needed them and I will do whatever they say. We will get her moved tomorrow so it will be another long day for me but it has to be. Tonight she is happy in her hospital room watching Dancing with the Stars and she is well medicated so I am just breathing and taking this moment for what it is. Peace. I swear she is so stubborn, I don't think anyone would still be going except her. I am there for you and thinking of you. Sleep well sister. Love, Nadine

teenadee

alexandria54 said:

Tina, to think of Anne
Tina, to think of Anne worried about us makes me cry. I will be praying so hard for you and her tonight. They are moving my sister to an assisted living studio. I don't know how long that will last but I'm glad it's not Adult Foster Care. No offense to anyone but with her head injury she must have privacy and a remote for the t.v.. We will see how it goes and I have put everything into the caregivers/social workers hands. They were so there when I needed them and I will do whatever they say. We will get her moved tomorrow so it will be another long day for me but it has to be. Tonight she is happy in her hospital room watching Dancing with the Stars and she is well medicated so I am just breathing and taking this moment for what it is. Peace. I swear she is so stubborn, I don't think anyone would still be going except her. I am there for you and thinking of you. Sleep well sister. Love, Nadine

me too about Anne
I feel like a complete idiot when I complain about a cough or not feeling well. Here is our dear friend going through h*ll and she is praying for us. I am so grateful to you and her for lifting me up in the worst of times. I truly wish we were all closer so we could get together (actually I probably wouldn't even be able to as I never have a free minute) BUT no I would find the time. I am glad you had some peace last night and your sister is a fighter and doesn't want to let go at all but it will help you that hse's in an assisted living studio and i'm glad she is not in adult foster care. I had never heard of this before. I know today will be an extremely long and tiresome day but I will send you good vibes and prayers to you and your family. take care my sweet Nadine, god bless you for the person you are and I am forever thankful to this site for helping us connect. xoxo Tina

AnneBehymer

teenadee said:

me too about Anne
I feel like a complete idiot when I complain about a cough or not feeling well. Here is our dear friend going through h*ll and she is praying for us. I am so grateful to you and her for lifting me up in the worst of times. I truly wish we were all closer so we could get together (actually I probably wouldn't even be able to as I never have a free minute) BUT no I would find the time. I am glad you had some peace last night and your sister is a fighter and doesn't want to let go at all but it will help you that hse's in an assisted living studio and i'm glad she is not in adult foster care. I had never heard of this before. I know today will be an extremely long and tiresome day but I will send you good vibes and prayers to you and your family. take care my sweet Nadine, god bless you for the person you are and I am forever thankful to this site for helping us connect. xoxo Tina

ok you two
Do you not realize that having both of you as friends hearing your problems and being able to pray for you helps me because it get my mind off of my cancer and treatment for once it not all about me. I am glad I have connected with you two wonderful women and I know your both are always lifting me up in prays please don't stop telling me when you are not feeling well or when you are having a hard day I want to be there for you I will tell you if it becomes to much I love you both have a great night.

Anne