Have you missed me???? I have missed all of you!!!
So much has been going on in my little corner of the universe~ wish that most of it was good...I apologize for not posting regularly~ seems like foerver since I have been on the boards.
A BRIEF re-cap of just the last 2 weeks or so...I continue to fight a respiratory "somthing" of unknown origin~ and after repeated visits and testing by an amazing pulmonologist, we are no further ahead than when I started with the chronic cough. It does not seem to be cancer-related ( whew!) nor is it allergies, constricted airways, or asthma. It may be acid reflux, and it's only symptom is a chronic cough. Sadly, thre is no test, blood or otherwise for acid~ it is a clinical diagnosis. I have lost about 10 pounds in the last 8 weeks~the coughing sadly makes me vomit ( TMI???) so food is a problem for me. I have now taken to juicing rather than eating solid food~ at least I am getting the nutrition I need. I hope, as does my Dr, that this will eventually resolve itself. That would be wonderful! :-)
I fired my oncologist after being his patient for 8 long years! I got a recommendation for an oncologist who will actually care about me, and make me part of a TEAM! I see him for the first time on Monday aternoon~ I am already in love with his office staff!
So, here is my Big Sigh~Reggie and I had a close family friend who spent every holiday and special family occasion with us. Aside from that, he pretty much ate with us 3 meals a day~ and defiitely had coffee with us every day~ for the past 5 years! He was the guy who would watch the house when we were out of town, feed the pets, put the trash-cans on the street~a lot of you have a family friend like that, I am sure. On June 24, as always, he came in the house from our garden ( oh yes, he also lovingly tended our garden EVERY DAY!)after having coffee, to tell me he didn't feel well. Reggie wasn't home, as he had just left to take our granddaughter to daycare. Our friend Jim was having a massive heart attack!!!! I called 911~ followed the instructions of the operator, Reggie came home and took over, and within 30 seconds, the paramedics arrived too. They tried unsuccessfully to revive him for over 40 minutes...but he lost his battle. Skipping ahead to the hospital portion of the story~ after the county coronor did whatever it is he does, Reggie, his brother and I got permission to go into the room with our friend Jim and "sing him home" with songs in the Chumash language. So much of that morning was a shock and sooooo difficult~all of Jim's family lives in NY or FL ( we are in California) and you can imagine how difficult it was to take his cell phone and scroll through the names/numbers ( OMG incuding the number for MOM) and calling her and his children~ Jim was only 52 years old. Jim was a retired from NYFD ( injured on the job) a former Marine, a Yankee fan and Irish as the day is long. On Sunday afternoon we are having a memorial here for him at the house~ I found St Patrick's Day decorations, also little American Flags. baseball stuff, etc etc. At 6PM we are raising a glass to him~ his family on the East Coast is doing the same at 9..so we will be in unison.
The shock, the sadness, coupled with some unavoidable plane travel and my regular health issues landed me in urgent care TWICE in one day! I am better...but tired, as you all
might imagine.
Tomorrow is the Relay For Life...Sunday Jim's memorial, Monday my new oncologist. I trust, knowing these few things, that you all will forgive me for not checking in and welcoming new ones, and of course, encouraging my fellow Kindreds. I promise to be back in the fold as soon as I can~ I have missed you all sooooo much!
Hugs,
Chen♥
Comments
-
You have nothing to apologize for, dear soul!!!
Except maybe not turning to US to ease your burden a bit!!!!
I know from experience that it is hard to reach out to others when you have always been the one people reach out to, the strong one, the one with all of the hugs. But I learned my lesson...when I reached out for help to others, I didn't get weaker, I got STRONGER!!!
BIG hugs and love to you, my dear Chen...anytime you need a shoulder...even from over 5500 miles away, I will be there!!!!
Hugs, Kathi0 -
Buddy, you are one amazing
Buddy, you are one amazing woman. Such a pillar of strength and a wonderful role model.
Loving hugs and prayers,
Lorrie0 -
I won't tell you to slow
I won't tell you to slow down, because I know you won't. I love that you pack so much joy and life into each day. But a little rest now and then goes a long way.
Hugs,
Linda0 -
We've missed you....butterflylvr said:Buddy, you are one amazing
Buddy, you are one amazing woman. Such a pillar of strength and a wonderful role model.
Loving hugs and prayers,
Lorrie
But certainly understand...I am so very sorry for the loss of your much beloved friend....may he rest in peace...and to have spent his last moments on this earth, with such a loving friend, as you, no doubt were...
As for the cough....have you by any chance started any new meds, especially a new BP med? My husband was put on Lisiniprol for BP last fall...for 3 months this man sounded like he was going to cough up a lung! This drug was the culprit...I was just put on it...my cough is nothing, yet, like his...also this trial chemo drug I am on can cause a cough...it's just something I'm throwing out to you....
I wish you calmer,sweeter days...I'll have my porch light on, too...
Lots of big ole hugs,
Nancy0 -
Thanks, Nancy! I wish IMAJW said:We've missed you....
But certainly understand...I am so very sorry for the loss of your much beloved friend....may he rest in peace...and to have spent his last moments on this earth, with such a loving friend, as you, no doubt were...
As for the cough....have you by any chance started any new meds, especially a new BP med? My husband was put on Lisiniprol for BP last fall...for 3 months this man sounded like he was going to cough up a lung! This drug was the culprit...I was just put on it...my cough is nothing, yet, like his...also this trial chemo drug I am on can cause a cough...it's just something I'm throwing out to you....
I wish you calmer,sweeter days...I'll have my porch light on, too...
Lots of big ole hugs,
Nancy
Thanks, Nancy! I wish I could attribute it to meds, but alas, no. I am sometimes amazed, that except for Tamoxifen, I take no meds! ( well I now take an acid reducer, but that is because of the cough, not the cause of it! LOL) The pulmonologist says that these things oftentimes run their course...I sure hope so!
And thank you for turning on your porch light...what a lovely thing to do!0 -
oh Chen..
so glad to hear from you and wow....so sorry to hear of your loss. You are one amazing person..I am proud to know you! You have touched those you know/see in person and those of us that are cyberspace friends. Your selflessness leaves me speechless. I am keeping you in my prayers and thoughts that all goes well for you and you will soon feel better. You are just such an inspiration to all of us here..........god bless....hugs0 -
I am very sorry for the lossMAJW said:We've missed you....
But certainly understand...I am so very sorry for the loss of your much beloved friend....may he rest in peace...and to have spent his last moments on this earth, with such a loving friend, as you, no doubt were...
As for the cough....have you by any chance started any new meds, especially a new BP med? My husband was put on Lisiniprol for BP last fall...for 3 months this man sounded like he was going to cough up a lung! This drug was the culprit...I was just put on it...my cough is nothing, yet, like his...also this trial chemo drug I am on can cause a cough...it's just something I'm throwing out to you....
I wish you calmer,sweeter days...I'll have my porch light on, too...
Lots of big ole hugs,
Nancy
I am very sorry for the loss of your Dear Friend! He was young! I'm sorry you are having the problem with the cough! You must be exhausted both physically & mentally! Good luck with your new Onc! Oh I take Lisiniprol too & do indeed have a cough, but Dr likes it. my husband is on it and does not have a cough.....
Hugs
Renee H0 -
Forgiven Dear Sister!
We just worry when we don't see a post in a while. All I can say is "Oh My Goodness!". You have been going through so much! I am so very sorry for the loss of such a dear and wonderful friend. His presence in your lives has certainly enriched you. What a beautiful act it was to sing to him. My sincerest condolences.
There has to be a reason for that cough. Could it even be stress induced? I know I've had issues (physically) when under stress. I'm praying it goes AWAY!
You have a very busy week ahead. Blessings and hugs to you friend. I'm glad to hear from you. We've missed you also!
Take care of yourself,
Sylvia0 -
Chensea60 said:Forgiven Dear Sister!
We just worry when we don't see a post in a while. All I can say is "Oh My Goodness!". You have been going through so much! I am so very sorry for the loss of such a dear and wonderful friend. His presence in your lives has certainly enriched you. What a beautiful act it was to sing to him. My sincerest condolences.
There has to be a reason for that cough. Could it even be stress induced? I know I've had issues (physically) when under stress. I'm praying it goes AWAY!
You have a very busy week ahead. Blessings and hugs to you friend. I'm glad to hear from you. We've missed you also!
Take care of yourself,
Sylvia
I am so saddened by the
Chen
I am so saddened by the news of this loss. And he was so young. Knowing you and Reggie I cannot think of anyone I would rather have break the sad news than both of you. Life certainly does throw punches. We bob and weave and sometimes they connect hard.
Hoping that your cough issue resolves. I have on occasion had a dry cough that gets to the point where I gag, retch and sometimes vomit. No know cause. It comes and goes. Hoping yours goes also.
I know how much you are on the go and all you do, but do remember not to run yourself down to the point of exhaustion. Not easy for a go getter like you but take good care of yourself.
You are always so supportive and encouraging to all. Know that I have you in my prayers and heart.
Stef0 -
Your absence is always notedRague said:Mitakuye Oyasin
Mitakuye Oyasin
Susan
and I missed you, but there is nothing to forgive. What a week you've had. So sad to learn about your friend. I hope that doggone cough is gone soon because I know it has to be concerning and annoying.
Thanks for bringing us up-to-date, Chen.
Love, Suzanne0 -
Hi Chen!
I am glad to see you.
I wanted to say I am very sorry for your loss. I can't even imagine what that felt like - so sorry. I pray his family will find the strength to cope with this. I also want you to be OK physically, emotionally and spiritually.
I am very happy you fired your Onco! Your situation should be better moving forward.
Stay strong. God bless you.
@>~~~0 -
Yes.Gabe N Abby Mom said:I won't tell you to slow
I won't tell you to slow down, because I know you won't. I love that you pack so much joy and life into each day. But a little rest now and then goes a long way.
Hugs,
Linda
Agreed. I think it's her "NEW YORK state of mind".
0 -
Oh Chen, I am so sorry for
Oh Chen, I am so sorry for everything you are going through. My condolences for your friend. You know you are part of us and we are always here for you. I know some times life gets busy. I to am not on here as much as I would like. I do think of you and all my sisters often. I wish you well friend Take care of your self. Kay0 -
Precious Dear One .. Please take care ..grams2jc said:And then can you take a breather?
Don't forget to take care of yourself, too. It's hard when so much needs to be done and you want to do what is needed, but take care of yourself. Selfishly, we want you here with us, we've missed you.
Jennifer
if that is possible. I am so sorry to hear about your dear friend, Jim. So much going on in your life, please be good to yourself - when possible.
Holding you close to my heart, prayers and positive thoughts coming your way.
Strength, Courage and Hope.
Vicki Sam0 -
Chen,VickiSam said:Precious Dear One .. Please take care ..
if that is possible. I am so sorry to hear about your dear friend, Jim. So much going on in your life, please be good to yourself - when possible.
Holding you close to my heart, prayers and positive thoughts coming your way.
Strength, Courage and Hope.
Vicki Sam
I'm so glad to hear
Chen,
I'm so glad to hear you have found a new oncologist who has a staff that is supportive enough for you to have already fallen in love!! I know you'll get through this weekend because that is who you are. Just take what time you can to regroup and get ready for Monday. Your Sisters in Pink are all here holding you up in spirit.
Chickadee0 -
Oh Kindred Spirits!!!! Youladyg said:Chen
I am really sorry to hear about the loss of your dear friend. My thoughts are with you and his family. Please take care of yourself as it sounds like you are doing more than you should but I also know you are doing what you want to do.
Hugs,
Georgia
Oh Kindred Spirits!!!! You are without a doubt the BEST group of women assembled anywhere! Ok, I would have liked it better if we were a book group, a political group, a gang of rock and roll groupies, a bunch of dieters, quilters, writers... LOL Being that we met here of all places, let me just say you soothe my soul and lift my spirits~ the journey with all of its potholes and uncertain terrain is so much easier to navigate with all of you by my side. Thank you for everything...I hope I give you even a smidgen of what you continue to give me.
Hugs,
Chen♥0 -
Hopechenheart said:Oh Kindred Spirits!!!! You
Oh Kindred Spirits!!!! You are without a doubt the BEST group of women assembled anywhere! Ok, I would have liked it better if we were a book group, a political group, a gang of rock and roll groupies, a bunch of dieters, quilters, writers... LOL Being that we met here of all places, let me just say you soothe my soul and lift my spirits~ the journey with all of its potholes and uncertain terrain is so much easier to navigate with all of you by my side. Thank you for everything...I hope I give you even a smidgen of what you continue to give me.
Hugs,
Chen♥
Hope they can get to the bottom of the coughing issue. Sorry about you close friend and hope you can feel at peace with his passing.0
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