CA 125 going up
Well, My CA 125 has been slowly going up and I am scheduled for PET scan. I was just enjoying being off chemo so much and I've got plans for the wedding going great guns. I planted my flowers for two weekends and felt so good to finally get in the dirt. I reveled in spring and feeling well.
I found out right after I got my wedding dress alterations in. I finally had let myself feel the excitement of the wedding. Now I probably won't have hair. We cried together last night, hubby and me. I gave it my best shot with hipec; the results will go to research.
My CA 125 has been accurate for me. It has never gone up and then gone down. I just needed my sisters to hug me. How do we do it, going up and down with our emotions and hopes? I think I am strong and then I find out I am still weak.
Hold my hand and give me strength.
Diane
Comments
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I am sorry
to hear about the rise in CA, because as you say it's been quite accurate for you... Big Cyber Hugs coming your way and prayers and well wishes and hand holding...
Hang in there, I can tell you're a very strong person and let us know what's going on.0 -
My dear friendCindy Bear said:I am sorry
to hear about the rise in CA, because as you say it's been quite accurate for you... Big Cyber Hugs coming your way and prayers and well wishes and hand holding...
Hang in there, I can tell you're a very strong person and let us know what's going on.
I have been wondering about you and intended to write.
It's hard not to get discouraged when "the NED bubble" bursts. DARN. Hang in there, my friend. Is your doc concerned? I will not monitor my CA125s just for this very reason - the stress and anxiety of negative anticipation.
On the plus side, these last month have allowed you to build up your strength for another battle which I believe you will win.
Please keep us posted. The low dose chemo + radiation worked for my recurrence - check with your doc aobut this option if tx is needed.
Much love to you, Mary Ann0 -
Please don't go into treatment on CA125 rise alone! (((Diane))))daisy366 said:My dear friend
I have been wondering about you and intended to write.
It's hard not to get discouraged when "the NED bubble" bursts. DARN. Hang in there, my friend. Is your doc concerned? I will not monitor my CA125s just for this very reason - the stress and anxiety of negative anticipation.
On the plus side, these last month have allowed you to build up your strength for another battle which I believe you will win.
Please keep us posted. The low dose chemo + radiation worked for my recurrence - check with your doc aobut this option if tx is needed.
Much love to you, Mary Ann
ARGH! I'm so sorry that your blissful remission has this cloud of doubt over it now. You didn't say how MUCH your CA125 went up. A spike? Are they talking about a CT or PET to see what's going on? I can see no advantage for rushing into chemo until you have a more definitive recurrence diagnosis based on more than CA125 alone. When is the wedding? Maybe you can hold off until afterwards. Take it from me, sweet one, rushing to get into chemo and leaving behind your remission is not the way to go if you can safely put it off. Please wait and see what the scans say. Remember how Ro handled her slowly rising CA125? That's what I recommend. Hang onto your chemo break as long as you safely can, and unless your scans show visible cancer or you are experiencing undeniable symptoms, I'll bet that you can safely enjoy remission awhile longer. (((Diane))).
I know you are heart-broken after you made such a BIG MOVE with such high hopes. I'm seeing an interventional radiologist today to try and make my own BIG MOVE, and I go into it with the same high hopes that you did. You give me a glimpse of what disappointment can look like and it hurts to see it. You are STRONG, Diane. Deep breath. Just wait for the scan results and try to find your Zen again in the meantime. I'm so sorry to have this cloud over your happy wedding-planning time. Call me if you want to talk. You will work your way back into the happiness of living in the 'now.' I know you will. (((Diane)))0 -
Diane
That sucks and I think crying is appropriate. I love your strength and ability to deal with things as they come. Even though I don't think any of us have met, there is a level of care and love that is shared within the group. Here's hoping you feel it, and it radiates warmth within you, but it still really sucks that the numbers are up.
Love and hoping for better days,
your friend in cyberspace,
Claudia0 -
My hand is outstretched looking to hold yours!
I just see you among those gorgeous flowers in the picture, I'm sure you will look great in your Mother of the Bride dress! The Queen will not go hatless to the Royal Wedding!
Hair, fiddle, when NED trips you have helped him up for us all, you are strong an will dance at the wedding!
Sara0 -
Thank you my sistersSara Zipora said:My hand is outstretched looking to hold yours!
I just see you among those gorgeous flowers in the picture, I'm sure you will look great in your Mother of the Bride dress! The Queen will not go hatless to the Royal Wedding!
Hair, fiddle, when NED trips you have helped him up for us all, you are strong an will dance at the wedding!
Sara
Emergency PET is scheduled for Friday. (that's what radiology called it)I know I really don't know what's going on yet. I don't have pain (except a little in fingers and toes). I agree Linda, I think this time I need to wait until my body is stronger. Yes, it's so hard when the bubble bursts. I was just having fun being a housewife again! I shop and run through the malls! Started reading with a strong mind and writing too.
Thank you for telling me I am strong as I really feel so weak. I did not let them tell me my CA 125 until it was a problem as I really wanted to enjoy this break and when I'd go for port flush, I'd go, "oh my god, I am a cancer patient!" I am with Mary Ann in that hearing the number all the time is sometimes like riding on an emotional roller coaster.
I will make the wedding and wear a queen hat; is that a tiara? Do they stay on wigs? Thank you for the giggles.
I have also read about PARP drugs with chemo and they sound promising but not out yet.
Most of all thank you for being me with me when I needed you. You are amazing women. If only we could all meet and be together.
Love You,
Diane0 -
DianeSongflower said:Thank you my sisters
Emergency PET is scheduled for Friday. (that's what radiology called it)I know I really don't know what's going on yet. I don't have pain (except a little in fingers and toes). I agree Linda, I think this time I need to wait until my body is stronger. Yes, it's so hard when the bubble bursts. I was just having fun being a housewife again! I shop and run through the malls! Started reading with a strong mind and writing too.
Thank you for telling me I am strong as I really feel so weak. I did not let them tell me my CA 125 until it was a problem as I really wanted to enjoy this break and when I'd go for port flush, I'd go, "oh my god, I am a cancer patient!" I am with Mary Ann in that hearing the number all the time is sometimes like riding on an emotional roller coaster.
I will make the wedding and wear a queen hat; is that a tiara? Do they stay on wigs? Thank you for the giggles.
I have also read about PARP drugs with chemo and they sound promising but not out yet.
Most of all thank you for being me with me when I needed you. You are amazing women. If only we could all meet and be together.
Love You,
Diane
My car is running and insured. It's a miracle.
You're in Califonria?
I might have to take a plane for that one. would love so much for us to get together, all of us. Might just be the collective energy needed to cure us all. Wonder if that would work.
Love and heart strings to you,
Claudia0 -
Kayaking?california_artist said:Diane
My car is running and insured. It's a miracle.
You're in Califonria?
I might have to take a plane for that one. would love so much for us to get together, all of us. Might just be the collective energy needed to cure us all. Wonder if that would work.
Love and heart strings to you,
Claudia
Hey, Diane,
Why don't we go for a ride this weekend whether permitting. It is a great way to welcome spring. They finally finished the DQ you know!!!!!
:):):) All my love, Mary Ann 0 -
That Sucks!daisy366 said:Kayaking?
Hey, Diane,
Why don't we go for a ride this weekend whether permitting. It is a great way to welcome spring. They finally finished the DQ you know!!!!!:):):) All my love, Mary Ann
Really.... that's the first thing that came to my mind. I didn't expect this - so soon - and after you've worked so hard against it. But..... you'll keep going strong. You'll plant your flowers and watch they rise up and who knows? Just keep going!
Much love, and thinking of you always,
Mia0 -
Diane, you are strong!
Diane, you are strong! Remember, we are like tea bags, we get strong when we get into hot water. But don't panic and put the cart before the horse. The rise in ca125 may mean something is up but you don't have enough info to take that leap to those 'bad hair-less' days. You may not even be in the chemo range. I know that awful feeling when you hear that number. It sure takes the wind out of your sails. But stand tall and catch the breeze so you can sail thru the wedding. How far away is it? Even if chemo is on the agenda, many second line drugs don't cause hair loss. And Linda is so right about not rushing into to treatment too soon. If it is just now at a notable level to get scanned you probably hve time for all the joy of the wedding.
Sending big bear hugs to you!
Annie0 -
Oh that's the pitts!upsofloating said:Diane, you are strong!
Diane, you are strong! Remember, we are like tea bags, we get strong when we get into hot water. But don't panic and put the cart before the horse. The rise in ca125 may mean something is up but you don't have enough info to take that leap to those 'bad hair-less' days. You may not even be in the chemo range. I know that awful feeling when you hear that number. It sure takes the wind out of your sails. But stand tall and catch the breeze so you can sail thru the wedding. How far away is it? Even if chemo is on the agenda, many second line drugs don't cause hair loss. And Linda is so right about not rushing into to treatment too soon. If it is just now at a notable level to get scanned you probably hve time for all the joy of the wedding.
Sending big bear hugs to you!
Annie
Gosh Diane it's such a joy to hear how you endure your life with/without the cancer. This cancer stuff isn't always working in our favor, therefore you need to pull up your big girl pants and keep on fighting the good fight...I know you can do it!!
Keep that beautiful smile on your face and everyone will know you're a winner~
Best to you always,
Jan
((( hugs )))0 -
Diane you are so stong
Sorry to hear about you Ca 125 going up. Keep focusing on that upcoming wedding and the excitement of it. I was hoping you could remain out of treatment for much longer. I am sending you a BIG CYBER HUG and squeezing your hand tightly. Hang in there. Take one day at a time. Glad you could cry with your husband. It is good to let those tears flow. Glad you got to play in the dirt. It has been too cool and wet to put in any annuals yet. Maybe this weekend. Don't give up hope. Remember that you are strong. You are another of my inspirations. In peace and caring.0 -
Diane
Of course you are not weak- just very human and very brave to be so honest with your feelings. I'm holding on as we give each other the strength we need. What are you planting next Diane? We started a new raised bed this week for the herbs. I can already taste the pesto.
Barb0 -
Dianebarb55 said:Diane
Of course you are not weak- just very human and very brave to be so honest with your feelings. I'm holding on as we give each other the strength we need. What are you planting next Diane? We started a new raised bed this week for the herbs. I can already taste the pesto.
Barb
Diane,
I agree with everyone this really SUCKS!! Diane you are so strong. I know this because you really helped me and gave me strength and courage to get through some crappy times. We will all join our hands to send you all the strength you need. Continue to plan the wedding. We will attach a beautiful tiara to your wig.
Much Love,
SUE0 -
You are strong, Diane, you just needed a momentSongflower said:Thank you my sisters
Emergency PET is scheduled for Friday. (that's what radiology called it)I know I really don't know what's going on yet. I don't have pain (except a little in fingers and toes). I agree Linda, I think this time I need to wait until my body is stronger. Yes, it's so hard when the bubble bursts. I was just having fun being a housewife again! I shop and run through the malls! Started reading with a strong mind and writing too.
Thank you for telling me I am strong as I really feel so weak. I did not let them tell me my CA 125 until it was a problem as I really wanted to enjoy this break and when I'd go for port flush, I'd go, "oh my god, I am a cancer patient!" I am with Mary Ann in that hearing the number all the time is sometimes like riding on an emotional roller coaster.
I will make the wedding and wear a queen hat; is that a tiara? Do they stay on wigs? Thank you for the giggles.
I have also read about PARP drugs with chemo and they sound promising but not out yet.
Most of all thank you for being me with me when I needed you. You are amazing women. If only we could all meet and be together.
Love You,
Diane
As all the other ladies said, Diane, you are strong, but hearing news like that just means that you and your body needed to take a moment. All the advice, from Linda, Annie, Ro et al makes so much sense. I love the analogy of the tea bag! Don't jump into treatment immediately if you can hold off to enjoy your wedding.
Thinking of you
Helen0 -
Thank you Warrior Womennorma2 said:{{{huggg}}}}}
Holding your hand and sending you a cyberhug. Norma
Thank you for picking me up out of the dirt and dusting me off. Your words of encouragement help so much. I feel your cyber hugs. I prayed to my Dad last night to give me some strength too. There's something about having a place to collapse safely and cry. It happens here for me. Can you all come to the wedding?
And Mary Ann,
I've got my kayack out; its been in storage too long. But, gulp, I've been to the dairy queen!
Your dearest friend,
Diane0 -
Sending strength and positive energy
Diane,
I was so sorry to hear about your rising CA125 and know this is very disappointing to you. Hopefully the PET scan will provide more specific (and good info). Delaying any treatment until after the big wedding is certainly an option. I am glad that you have been feeling good and enjoying all of the hustle and bustle of getting ready for the event.
By the way, when is it?
Being frightened and shedding tears is not a sign of weakness. You are certainly not weak!! We are here for all of the sisters on this board, just like you have always been... so strong, thoughtful and helpful!
Enjoy your newly planted flowers, get your wedding dress on, and comb your hair....you have important things to do!!
Big hugs, Karen0 -
Echokkstef said:Sending strength and positive energy
Diane,
I was so sorry to hear about your rising CA125 and know this is very disappointing to you. Hopefully the PET scan will provide more specific (and good info). Delaying any treatment until after the big wedding is certainly an option. I am glad that you have been feeling good and enjoying all of the hustle and bustle of getting ready for the event.
By the way, when is it?
Being frightened and shedding tears is not a sign of weakness. You are certainly not weak!! We are here for all of the sisters on this board, just like you have always been... so strong, thoughtful and helpful!
Enjoy your newly planted flowers, get your wedding dress on, and comb your hair....you have important things to do!!
Big hugs, Karen
Dear Diane-
Just echoing what everyone has said and wanting to let you know I'm sending all my hopes and prayers and positive thoughts your way.
Best wishes, hugs, etc., etc.
Suzanne0 -
Diane:
Reaching out my hand
Diane:
Reaching out my hand to you. Sorry I just got your post. We lost electricity the other day due to an accident. Then my sons were using my computer.
There is a lot of stuff I would like to say to you but I have a hard time putting it to words, so I am just sending you a hug (((DIANE))).
Sending you positive vibes.
Kathy0
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