feeling helpless with my dads condition

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loveandhope
loveandhope Member Posts: 52
edited March 2014 in Colorectal Cancer #1
I wish i could hug you all and make all ur suffering better, but i can't. "I feel just as helplesss with my dad". i just don't know how to make things better!! i wrote him this and it inspired him. i hope it helps any of u too. I remember all of you in my prayers.....i know most of u live very far away from gibraltar but if u are ever near, know you have a friend here. xxxxxx
...........................................................................................


Letter to my new guest
------------------------

Dear uninvited guest,(cancer)

I never invited you; you never even introduced yourself until you were settled in. I never made you feel comfortable, yet you continue to dwell in my body. Slowly you are trying to invade every corner, trying to claim it bit by bit. At home we talk of nothing but you since you came into my life

I never thought that I would be saying this, but one day you and I will become friends. I will know as much about you as you have come to know about me. I must admit that when I first met you, I was afraid of you. I am no longer afraid. I just feel indignant at the way you forced yourself into my life.

I can’t make you go away, though I want you to know, that I'll never stop trying to. Don’t make yourself comfortable, I will never let you relax. Continue trying to steal from me, I won’t give you anything without a fight. I know that you will win a few battles but you have to know that I intend to win the war

So, if you are planning on staying for a while, there are a few things that you should know!

• If there is one in a million who make it, be warned that I will be fighting
this as if I am that one in the million!
• There are days when I will decide that you are not going to wear me out.
• You are going to have to hear me when I tell you “NOT TODAY!” Most of the time
I will decide to spend my day pretendig that you are not here.
• There will come a time when, with help from God, my family, friends and doctors,
that we WILL get rid of you. You might come back uninvited again, but by then
I'll be stronger. I will know that I have beaten you before and I will know that
I can do it again
• I will teach you to be compassionate in front of my kids. Nothing you can ever do
can be stronger than the love and support they give me everyday. I can feel you
die a little when I am surrounded by my children. I will not allow you to show
your ugly side when they are around. Their love and faith will help me do that.
• I know you will try your hardest to shake my faith, but I will make you feel the
same peace and love I feel when I pray. At the end of the day you have to know
that only God decides if it’s time for you or me to leave. But I will show you
that faith can move mountains! (I think that I am showing you already!)
• I will allow you to meet my wife. She is the person who shares all my joys, my
sorrows and pain. She is the person who will be helping me to cope with you on a
daily basis. You will be touched by her beauty; both inside and out. By the way
she loves and cares for me, by her unconditional love. You will feel the need to
be at your best when in her presence and I will appreciate that. But even if you
decide to show her your ugly side, don’t be mistaken by her gentle nature. When it
comes to me, my wife is the strongest most resilient person you will ever come
across. She will do anything in her power to get rid of you. I don’t think that
she will ever be your friend! She will make sure that I take those tablets. The
ones that make you go away. She will cook the most nutritious, lovely food to
ensure that I have all the strength I need to kick you out. But most importantly
of all, she is the one who is going to give me all the encouragement and love I
need to get through this. There’s no medication that can match that!
• One day, but not for a very long time, I might decide that I don’t wish to fight
you any longer. Don’t count on this though, as this is not very likely, but until
then, learn to live with me. I can be very stubborn. When I say NO I mean
NO,and if im not ready to go anywhere yet….I ain’t going!!

So if you decide to stay for a while, remember that you have not been invited. Don’t expect me to plan my life around you. By all means if you like travelling, come along I’m planning next years holiday. If like me, you have a good appetite, come to dinner. I love eating out. I hope you enjoy celebrating special occasions because I am planning on enjoying many Christmases, birthdays and other festivities with my family. Just don’t expect to run my life. I am in control. This is my life and there is so much that I am allowing you to take over!

PS: I don’t think that we will ever be the best of friends but if you are planning on staying a while we must learn to get along.




‘Conditionally’ Yours




………………………………….

Comments

  • Buzzard
    Buzzard Member Posts: 3,043 Member
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    Whew...........Most likely the strongest thing I have read......
    Very good, in fact very great. Makes me want to stand up and cheer for you and also for what you did for me... That makes me feel very good to hear how you take back control that is lost ...That was very good to read and is so very true on how we should not allow it to run or ruin our lives.....Your dad has to be proud of that...

    On the other hand, you are not helpless in this...showing your love and letting him know that you are there is enough for him...Thats good medicine to have your children around. There is medically nothing you can do or you would do it and we all know that. Just being there for him gives him life and after what I just read he is sure to be proud of a brilliant daughter. That certainly hit home...Thank you for that , it was really needed....Love to all of you and Hope for us all, Buzz
  • AnneCan
    AnneCan Member Posts: 3,673 Member
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    Gabrielle
    Thank you so much for sharing this! It is unbelievable! You have written a very powerful + empowering piece. No wonder it inspired your Dad. It sure has inspired me. What a wonderful daughter you are. Thanks again.
  • Lovekitties
    Lovekitties Member Posts: 3,364 Member
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    Absolutely wonderful!
    How proud your dad must be of you not only for your writing skills, but for your understanding of where life is from the moment of a cancer diagnosis.

    Thank you so very much for sharing your writing. It deserves to be published, or perhaps read at the next Stand Up for Cancer Marathon.

    Wishing you and your family many good years to come.

    Hugs,

    Marie who loves kitties
  • pepebcn
    pepebcn Member Posts: 6,331 Member
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    Absolutely wonderful!
    How proud your dad must be of you not only for your writing skills, but for your understanding of where life is from the moment of a cancer diagnosis.

    Thank you so very much for sharing your writing. It deserves to be published, or perhaps read at the next Stand Up for Cancer Marathon.

    Wishing you and your family many good years to come.

    Hugs,

    Marie who loves kitties

    Gabrielle what a wonder!
    Its really touching!,really inspiring for all of us , thank for writing such a wonderful
    things!.Hugs and besos!
  • luvmum
    luvmum Member Posts: 457 Member
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    master piece
    Hi Gabrielle,

    I think I will spend sometime translate your piece of work for my mum. I hope this will inspire her as well.

    I wish, really wish I could be as strong as you!
    wish my best wishes and love
    Dora
  • Sonia32
    Sonia32 Member Posts: 1,071 Member
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    Hey
    Thank you for sharing that, I've sent you a pm hope you've got it.

    Hugs
    sonia
  • Sonia32
    Sonia32 Member Posts: 1,071 Member
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    luvmum said:

    master piece
    Hi Gabrielle,

    I think I will spend sometime translate your piece of work for my mum. I hope this will inspire her as well.

    I wish, really wish I could be as strong as you!
    wish my best wishes and love
    Dora

    double post
    .
  • loveandhope
    loveandhope Member Posts: 52
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    Sonia32 said:

    Hey
    Thank you for sharing that, I've sent you a pm hope you've got it.

    Hugs
    sonia

    thx
    thx guys. just know youre not alone......where are you from sonia, i got your pm and have sent one back...thx

    gabs xxxxx
  • bruins1971
    bruins1971 Member Posts: 227
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    Thank You So Very Much
    What you wrote here today was absolutely the best thing I have read since I was diagnosed. I loved it so much I have printed a copy of it to post on my desk and also shared it on my facebook page. Thank you and God Bless You
  • tootsie1
    tootsie1 Member Posts: 5,044 Member
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    Wow!
    That's so wonderful! Thanks for sharing it with us.

    *hugs*
    Gail
  • OGammy01
    OGammy01 Member Posts: 67
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    thx
    thx guys. just know youre not alone......where are you from sonia, i got your pm and have sent one back...thx

    gabs xxxxx

    Letter to cancer
    Oh Gabs, Your letter to cancer so touched me! What a beautiful piece! I'm going to print it out and read it every day.

    Thank you and a big hug,

    Diane
  • OGammy01
    OGammy01 Member Posts: 67
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    thx
    thx guys. just know youre not alone......where are you from sonia, i got your pm and have sent one back...thx

    gabs xxxxx

    Sorry double post. It's that
    Sorry double post. It's that old devil Folfox!