Choosing Hospice
Comments
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Hey Brookie -just4Brooks said:
)
You welcome... Sorry to ruffel so many people. LOL
You hafta' keep the blood pressure up, that's what keeps us alive!
It's a good thread. It gives us something to think about, besides
some bump that wasn't there before... If thought isn't encouraged,
we'll just rot away.
And besides, there's nothing on TV..
Good health to you!
(and everyone else, too)
John0 -
My cousin in Hospice
I had to call hospice for my 80 year old cousin 2 months ago. I'm extremely grateful to them. No, he doesn't have cancer, he has other problems which aren't curable, the doc's have nothing more they can do for him.
He isn't drugged to a point that he doesn't know anything, as a matter of fact, to me, he doesn't have enough drugs, he still is in some pain. I hate the pain he suffers, he doesn't understand it. Hospice has at least seen to it, that he gets pain killers, which don't affect his mind. Thankfully (he's in a nursing home)hospice is seeing to his comfort, I travel every week to see him, (he lives in another town) and anything of concern, I call hospice and it is taken care of immediately (I HATE NURSING HOMES). After I asked, they brought in an air bed, then when I said he was complaining about his feet, they came and brought him an air pillow (the bed was too harsh for his poor tender feet). I travel every week to see him, I'm thankful for the hospice people for being there when I can't. A gentleman even comes once a week just to VISIT with him from hospice. I tried to get the nursing home to give him his favorite food (ICECREAM) daily and they sure weren't doing it. I called hospice, and it's been added to his daily diet.
So, in my view, thank you to the powers that be for hospice.0 -
Hospiceherdizziness said:My cousin in Hospice
I had to call hospice for my 80 year old cousin 2 months ago. I'm extremely grateful to them. No, he doesn't have cancer, he has other problems which aren't curable, the doc's have nothing more they can do for him.
He isn't drugged to a point that he doesn't know anything, as a matter of fact, to me, he doesn't have enough drugs, he still is in some pain. I hate the pain he suffers, he doesn't understand it. Hospice has at least seen to it, that he gets pain killers, which don't affect his mind. Thankfully (he's in a nursing home)hospice is seeing to his comfort, I travel every week to see him, (he lives in another town) and anything of concern, I call hospice and it is taken care of immediately (I HATE NURSING HOMES). After I asked, they brought in an air bed, then when I said he was complaining about his feet, they came and brought him an air pillow (the bed was too harsh for his poor tender feet). I travel every week to see him, I'm thankful for the hospice people for being there when I can't. A gentleman even comes once a week just to VISIT with him from hospice. I tried to get the nursing home to give him his favorite food (ICECREAM) daily and they sure weren't doing it. I called hospice, and it's been added to his daily diet.
So, in my view, thank you to the powers that be for hospice.
I know I'm the newbie here, but if I may put in my 2 cents? For what it's worth, I worked for Hospice as a CNA while going through nursing school, and found it very rewarding. I still remember the warm and meaningful conversations I had with both patients and families, and I will carry them with me forever. The most memorable of which was with a middle aged,beautiful lady with terminal colon cancer(how ironic). We discussed life after death and many other deep subjects. Before I left, she gave me the biggest hug and thanked me for talking with her so openly and honestly, you see, no one would ever discuss death and dying with her. They all shhhh'd her when she would bring it up. Much like what I'm experiencing. I know I'm going to fight my hardest, but the truth is, we are all going to die. Some of us are just reminded of it more than others, and it's nice to be able to talk open and honestly with someone who will listen, and not be shhhh'd. My point is, Hospice is more than "easing someone out", it's about compassion, caring, and listening with an open heart, and mind when no one else will.0 -
Sometimes......
Sometimes choosing hospice is about having the strength to LET GO. We all know how much strength it takes to hold on to the hope that you will win this battle but it takes enormous strength to make a decision to stop the fight. This is always, and should be, a very personal and individual decision made only by the person who must go through the day-by-day struggle of trying to stay alive.
I wouldn't dream of asking a loved one to "never give up" and would never insist they seek additional treatments long after they have been subjected to more than their bodies can take just so I can have a few more precious months with them.
Hospice is about choices. Choosing how you will spend the remainder of your days. Something I hope I have a chance to decide.0 -
You are RightAnnaLeigh said:Sometimes......
Sometimes choosing hospice is about having the strength to LET GO. We all know how much strength it takes to hold on to the hope that you will win this battle but it takes enormous strength to make a decision to stop the fight. This is always, and should be, a very personal and individual decision made only by the person who must go through the day-by-day struggle of trying to stay alive.
I wouldn't dream of asking a loved one to "never give up" and would never insist they seek additional treatments long after they have been subjected to more than their bodies can take just so I can have a few more precious months with them.
Hospice is about choices. Choosing how you will spend the remainder of your days. Something I hope I have a chance to decide.
My mom fought the hard battle and after it spread to her liver and other places (breast cancer) she told my dad "enough is enough." She couldn't do any more chemo and just wanted to "go home." Didn't live close to my mom at the time she was going through this but remember my daughter and I were on the way home as she had slipped into a coma the day before (and she was able to be at home because of hospice). My mom died 15 minutes before we got there. My daughter said to the hospice nurse "mean I came all this way for not even being even able to see Grandma one last time" and the beautiful hospice nurse sat on the front porch step and talked to my daughter and said, "she knew you and you're mom were coming. She wanted you to remember her how she was and not see her dying". Wow, brings tears to my eyes now. Those hospice nurses are very amazing to say the least. Thank God for them because my family had help with my mom in her last days and made them the most comfortable for her.
Kim0 -
Wonderful storyAnnabelle41415 said:You are Right
My mom fought the hard battle and after it spread to her liver and other places (breast cancer) she told my dad "enough is enough." She couldn't do any more chemo and just wanted to "go home." Didn't live close to my mom at the time she was going through this but remember my daughter and I were on the way home as she had slipped into a coma the day before (and she was able to be at home because of hospice). My mom died 15 minutes before we got there. My daughter said to the hospice nurse "mean I came all this way for not even being even able to see Grandma one last time" and the beautiful hospice nurse sat on the front porch step and talked to my daughter and said, "she knew you and you're mom were coming. She wanted you to remember her how she was and not see her dying". Wow, brings tears to my eyes now. Those hospice nurses are very amazing to say the least. Thank God for them because my family had help with my mom in her last days and made them the most comfortable for her.
Kim
That's beautiful, Kim.
*hugs*
Gail0 -
KimAnnabelle41415 said:You are Right
My mom fought the hard battle and after it spread to her liver and other places (breast cancer) she told my dad "enough is enough." She couldn't do any more chemo and just wanted to "go home." Didn't live close to my mom at the time she was going through this but remember my daughter and I were on the way home as she had slipped into a coma the day before (and she was able to be at home because of hospice). My mom died 15 minutes before we got there. My daughter said to the hospice nurse "mean I came all this way for not even being even able to see Grandma one last time" and the beautiful hospice nurse sat on the front porch step and talked to my daughter and said, "she knew you and you're mom were coming. She wanted you to remember her how she was and not see her dying". Wow, brings tears to my eyes now. Those hospice nurses are very amazing to say the least. Thank God for them because my family had help with my mom in her last days and made them the most comfortable for her.
Kim
Very touching story, thank you for posting it...0 -
Gracie -unknown said:This comment has been removed by the Moderator
Re:
"Would you have rather they died gasping for air rather than peaceful?"
There is so much furor over a perception of what I said, and I
just don't know how to say it with a more definitive statement.
I said:
"Make certain there is -absolutely- no hope left, before committing
to death's door; There are always options that haven't been tried,
and death should be the very, very last option, because there
are no more options after that."
And -that- was addressed to anyone that has not yet explored other
remedies, or did their best to seek other opinions.
It was -not- directed to those that have gone to the end, and know
what "the end" is.
There are people Grace, that seem to think Hospice is akin to a
rest home or some sort of assisted care facility. It is most definitely
not akin to those. It is not "palliative" care, it is geared to making
the end of life as comfortable as possible for the patient and family.
For that purpose, they serve a very, very good cause.......
But patients and families have to understand, that once the hospice
begins to administer medications to help the patient cope with
oncoming death, the patient will lose the inherent quest for life.
It has to be that way, since it is that very inherent desire to live,
that is the cause of intense emotional pain if it is not stifled.
Make sure that death is immanent; hospice is a one-way road.
I'm sorry if it is being taken wrong, but it's that simple, and I really
don't know how to get it across any better than that.
John0 -
Not to run this into the groundJohn23 said:Gracie -
Re:
"Would you have rather they died gasping for air rather than peaceful?"
There is so much furor over a perception of what I said, and I
just don't know how to say it with a more definitive statement.
I said:
"Make certain there is -absolutely- no hope left, before committing
to death's door; There are always options that haven't been tried,
and death should be the very, very last option, because there
are no more options after that."
And -that- was addressed to anyone that has not yet explored other
remedies, or did their best to seek other opinions.
It was -not- directed to those that have gone to the end, and know
what "the end" is.
There are people Grace, that seem to think Hospice is akin to a
rest home or some sort of assisted care facility. It is most definitely
not akin to those. It is not "palliative" care, it is geared to making
the end of life as comfortable as possible for the patient and family.
For that purpose, they serve a very, very good cause.......
But patients and families have to understand, that once the hospice
begins to administer medications to help the patient cope with
oncoming death, the patient will lose the inherent quest for life.
It has to be that way, since it is that very inherent desire to live,
that is the cause of intense emotional pain if it is not stifled.
Make sure that death is immanent; hospice is a one-way road.
I'm sorry if it is being taken wrong, but it's that simple, and I really
don't know how to get it across any better than that.
John
John, you say "Make certain there is -absolutely- no hope left, before committing to death's door; There are always options that haven't been tried, and death should be the very, very last option, because there are no more options after that."
Do you believe that some people may know when it's time to let go? They may have had enough and do not wish to explore every option that may be out there. I do not think that you would want someone to keep on trying this and that if they do not wish to just to so they can try to satisfy someone else's idea of how they should die. That seems like it is just trying to satisfy the living and puts the person whose life it is as just a spectator in their own existence.
I believe some people are more in touch/at peace than others are and know when they have done all they can or want to do and it's time for them to enjoy what time they have left. No one is talking about making someone choose hospice against their will. Some people are ready to go while others are not ready to go. Some people who love and care about the person wish to respect their wishes even if they do not agree with them. Other times I think their own fear of dying gets in the way and they may not be able to understand or accept that someone is choosing to be at peace.
If someone really loves the person, they would respect their wishes no matter how much it may hurt. Like I've said before, I think death is the hardest on those who are left behind.
Death is immanent; being alive is a one-way road.
-phil0 -
This comment has been removed by the ModeratorJohn23 said:Gracie -
Re:
"Would you have rather they died gasping for air rather than peaceful?"
There is so much furor over a perception of what I said, and I
just don't know how to say it with a more definitive statement.
I said:
"Make certain there is -absolutely- no hope left, before committing
to death's door; There are always options that haven't been tried,
and death should be the very, very last option, because there
are no more options after that."
And -that- was addressed to anyone that has not yet explored other
remedies, or did their best to seek other opinions.
It was -not- directed to those that have gone to the end, and know
what "the end" is.
There are people Grace, that seem to think Hospice is akin to a
rest home or some sort of assisted care facility. It is most definitely
not akin to those. It is not "palliative" care, it is geared to making
the end of life as comfortable as possible for the patient and family.
For that purpose, they serve a very, very good cause.......
But patients and families have to understand, that once the hospice
begins to administer medications to help the patient cope with
oncoming death, the patient will lose the inherent quest for life.
It has to be that way, since it is that very inherent desire to live,
that is the cause of intense emotional pain if it is not stifled.
Make sure that death is immanent; hospice is a one-way road.
I'm sorry if it is being taken wrong, but it's that simple, and I really
don't know how to get it across any better than that.
John0 -
Oh my.... more...PhillieG said:Not to run this into the ground
John, you say "Make certain there is -absolutely- no hope left, before committing to death's door; There are always options that haven't been tried, and death should be the very, very last option, because there are no more options after that."
Do you believe that some people may know when it's time to let go? They may have had enough and do not wish to explore every option that may be out there. I do not think that you would want someone to keep on trying this and that if they do not wish to just to so they can try to satisfy someone else's idea of how they should die. That seems like it is just trying to satisfy the living and puts the person whose life it is as just a spectator in their own existence.
I believe some people are more in touch/at peace than others are and know when they have done all they can or want to do and it's time for them to enjoy what time they have left. No one is talking about making someone choose hospice against their will. Some people are ready to go while others are not ready to go. Some people who love and care about the person wish to respect their wishes even if they do not agree with them. Other times I think their own fear of dying gets in the way and they may not be able to understand or accept that someone is choosing to be at peace.
If someone really loves the person, they would respect their wishes no matter how much it may hurt. Like I've said before, I think death is the hardest on those who are left behind.
Death is immanent; being alive is a one-way road.
-phil
Phil...
Re:
"Do you believe that some people may know when it's time to let go?"
Yes Phil, I do.
My mother had several books that explained in great detail, how to
end life without pain or discomfort. It told what medications to use,
how to use the system to accumulate the needed amounts.. and to
have enough in excess, just in case supplies are confiscated.
She had "home hospice", since it was the easiest way to get as
much medication as she asked for, without question.
When she felt it was time, she died peacefully at home with my
father looking after her. It was the way she wanted it, and I don't
blame her one bit. I have those books in storage. I don't know
why I had felt compelled to save them, but I am now very glad
that I did. Sooner or later, they will come in handy.
After she died, a neighbor told me how hospice dumped boxes and
boxes of excess pills that she had stored up.
She was fully cognizant of everything she was doing, and she knew
when it was "time".
Re:
"I believe some people are more in touch/at peace than others are
and know when they have done all they can or want to do "
Absolutely, as I explained above, but.........
Medications can also allow one to feel that they are in touch/at peace,
and help welcome the "inevitable".
Don't you think it is important to insure individuals know that medications
will be administered that will do that?
That the family should know that a desire to continue searching for a cure,
can be stifled through medication.
How about another analogy?
My friend had been talking to me about finding new western medicine
treatments, and I printed out numerous posts from -this- forum for him,
that discussed some very exciting new procedures. I included some
posts that told of the same conditions and prognosis, and how the
posters are still doing well.
But by the time I got the information to him, he no longer had any
interest, and was instead looking forward to "moving on", and
seeing and "being with" friends and family that were long gone.
His daughter told me he wasn't the same; he was sounding like he
was looking forward to dying more than looking forward to living.
She wasn't aware that anti-depressants can change a person so much,
and yet.... she couldn't adjust to the idea that he would give up, when
just a short time before, he was so full of hope.
Medications can do that, dammit.
So...... if I have to scream it from a rooftop.......
PLEASE.... Make sure that you want to die, before checking into a hospice.
Death should already be the chosen route, PRIOR to checking into a hospice.
I'm done. This is too damned depressing, especially after the past few weeks
of cyber friends dying.
There are plenty of viable options to TCM, to Chemo, to whatever it is,
that one is taking. There are options. Look for them, and try them, you
only live once.
Bless you all.
John0 -
WowPhillieG said:Not to run this into the ground
John, you say "Make certain there is -absolutely- no hope left, before committing to death's door; There are always options that haven't been tried, and death should be the very, very last option, because there are no more options after that."
Do you believe that some people may know when it's time to let go? They may have had enough and do not wish to explore every option that may be out there. I do not think that you would want someone to keep on trying this and that if they do not wish to just to so they can try to satisfy someone else's idea of how they should die. That seems like it is just trying to satisfy the living and puts the person whose life it is as just a spectator in their own existence.
I believe some people are more in touch/at peace than others are and know when they have done all they can or want to do and it's time for them to enjoy what time they have left. No one is talking about making someone choose hospice against their will. Some people are ready to go while others are not ready to go. Some people who love and care about the person wish to respect their wishes even if they do not agree with them. Other times I think their own fear of dying gets in the way and they may not be able to understand or accept that someone is choosing to be at peace.
If someone really loves the person, they would respect their wishes no matter how much it may hurt. Like I've said before, I think death is the hardest on those who are left behind.
Death is immanent; being alive is a one-way road.
-phil
Phil once again you hit it on target (sorry John love what you have to say but this topic I'm not sure you can get your point across but always love your opinion). By the way, love that picture. You look like you are dreaming about some beautiful woman on a beach someplace
Wow what a smile.
Kim0 -
touchy subjectunknown said:This comment has been removed by the Moderator
Okay, you know me here are my two cents worth. I think, which is probably how most moronic statements on my part start but...I think John is not ripping on Hospice as much as he is trying desperately to keep people fighting. It sounds as if he has seen quite a few friends pass and it hurts. He is just trying to make sure no one gives up before all avenues of a "cure" or at least the a prolonging of life, with quality ahve been exhausted.
Enter all those who have witnessed in their eyes the seemingly endless struggle of a loved one, the pain, the loss of quality in their life. they're friend our loved ones are tired and it is a horrible thing to watch. Seems to me both sides are saying the same thing just from different perspectives so to speak. Fight the good fight, and exhaust all options (john) and from the others, there personal accounts seem to be that this is in fact what they're loved ones have done. For their own personal reasons and and they are similar and yet different in every case just as this disease is, they have reached a place where hospice is right for them. It boils down to each individual having the right to chose, and know one knows better then the person who is making that choice. Each of us have our own agenda when it comes to how we handle this and how we would like the people we care about to handle it, sometimes for our sake, and sometimes for theirs but the only person who is qualified to know when enough is enough is the person who is facing that decision for themselves. everyone who has been DX with this, makes decisions based on a wide variety of variables, and no one can fully understand the hows and whys of that process, except the person who is making them. If we arent making the decision it seems to me that the thing to do is respect their wishes, support them as best we can. And if and when we are faced with this difficult choice, I think it is our hope that those we love will do the same for us. right and wrong is not for us to decide it is for those who have the ultimate decision.
There is no doubt that each of us on here want everyone else to know we support them no matter there decision, after all none of us, although we share similar paths take this journey wearing the same moccasins as our friends.
bless you all
chris0 -
Well said Chris!greybeard64 said:touchy subject
Okay, you know me here are my two cents worth. I think, which is probably how most moronic statements on my part start but...I think John is not ripping on Hospice as much as he is trying desperately to keep people fighting. It sounds as if he has seen quite a few friends pass and it hurts. He is just trying to make sure no one gives up before all avenues of a "cure" or at least the a prolonging of life, with quality ahve been exhausted.
Enter all those who have witnessed in their eyes the seemingly endless struggle of a loved one, the pain, the loss of quality in their life. they're friend our loved ones are tired and it is a horrible thing to watch. Seems to me both sides are saying the same thing just from different perspectives so to speak. Fight the good fight, and exhaust all options (john) and from the others, there personal accounts seem to be that this is in fact what they're loved ones have done. For their own personal reasons and and they are similar and yet different in every case just as this disease is, they have reached a place where hospice is right for them. It boils down to each individual having the right to chose, and know one knows better then the person who is making that choice. Each of us have our own agenda when it comes to how we handle this and how we would like the people we care about to handle it, sometimes for our sake, and sometimes for theirs but the only person who is qualified to know when enough is enough is the person who is facing that decision for themselves. everyone who has been DX with this, makes decisions based on a wide variety of variables, and no one can fully understand the hows and whys of that process, except the person who is making them. If we arent making the decision it seems to me that the thing to do is respect their wishes, support them as best we can. And if and when we are faced with this difficult choice, I think it is our hope that those we love will do the same for us. right and wrong is not for us to decide it is for those who have the ultimate decision.
There is no doubt that each of us on here want everyone else to know we support them no matter there decision, after all none of us, although we share similar paths take this journey wearing the same moccasins as our friends.
bless you all
chris
Thanks for posting this.0 -
Chris -greybeard64 said:touchy subject
Okay, you know me here are my two cents worth. I think, which is probably how most moronic statements on my part start but...I think John is not ripping on Hospice as much as he is trying desperately to keep people fighting. It sounds as if he has seen quite a few friends pass and it hurts. He is just trying to make sure no one gives up before all avenues of a "cure" or at least the a prolonging of life, with quality ahve been exhausted.
Enter all those who have witnessed in their eyes the seemingly endless struggle of a loved one, the pain, the loss of quality in their life. they're friend our loved ones are tired and it is a horrible thing to watch. Seems to me both sides are saying the same thing just from different perspectives so to speak. Fight the good fight, and exhaust all options (john) and from the others, there personal accounts seem to be that this is in fact what they're loved ones have done. For their own personal reasons and and they are similar and yet different in every case just as this disease is, they have reached a place where hospice is right for them. It boils down to each individual having the right to chose, and know one knows better then the person who is making that choice. Each of us have our own agenda when it comes to how we handle this and how we would like the people we care about to handle it, sometimes for our sake, and sometimes for theirs but the only person who is qualified to know when enough is enough is the person who is facing that decision for themselves. everyone who has been DX with this, makes decisions based on a wide variety of variables, and no one can fully understand the hows and whys of that process, except the person who is making them. If we arent making the decision it seems to me that the thing to do is respect their wishes, support them as best we can. And if and when we are faced with this difficult choice, I think it is our hope that those we love will do the same for us. right and wrong is not for us to decide it is for those who have the ultimate decision.
There is no doubt that each of us on here want everyone else to know we support them no matter there decision, after all none of us, although we share similar paths take this journey wearing the same moccasins as our friends.
bless you all
chris
Re:
"He is just trying to make sure no one gives up before all avenues of a
"cure" or at least the a prolonging of life, with quality have been exhausted."
That was exactly my point. I sat here wondering if anyone "got it";
you have given me new hope.... (oh-ooh...?)
Seriously, thanks man !!
John0 -
Chrisgreybeard64 said:touchy subject
Okay, you know me here are my two cents worth. I think, which is probably how most moronic statements on my part start but...I think John is not ripping on Hospice as much as he is trying desperately to keep people fighting. It sounds as if he has seen quite a few friends pass and it hurts. He is just trying to make sure no one gives up before all avenues of a "cure" or at least the a prolonging of life, with quality ahve been exhausted.
Enter all those who have witnessed in their eyes the seemingly endless struggle of a loved one, the pain, the loss of quality in their life. they're friend our loved ones are tired and it is a horrible thing to watch. Seems to me both sides are saying the same thing just from different perspectives so to speak. Fight the good fight, and exhaust all options (john) and from the others, there personal accounts seem to be that this is in fact what they're loved ones have done. For their own personal reasons and and they are similar and yet different in every case just as this disease is, they have reached a place where hospice is right for them. It boils down to each individual having the right to chose, and know one knows better then the person who is making that choice. Each of us have our own agenda when it comes to how we handle this and how we would like the people we care about to handle it, sometimes for our sake, and sometimes for theirs but the only person who is qualified to know when enough is enough is the person who is facing that decision for themselves. everyone who has been DX with this, makes decisions based on a wide variety of variables, and no one can fully understand the hows and whys of that process, except the person who is making them. If we arent making the decision it seems to me that the thing to do is respect their wishes, support them as best we can. And if and when we are faced with this difficult choice, I think it is our hope that those we love will do the same for us. right and wrong is not for us to decide it is for those who have the ultimate decision.
There is no doubt that each of us on here want everyone else to know we support them no matter there decision, after all none of us, although we share similar paths take this journey wearing the same moccasins as our friends.
bless you all
chris
You voiced it very eloquently. Thanks.I appreciate your efforts to look through the static and see where everyone was coming from.Good job!
-Pat0 -
G'day JohnJohn23 said:Chris -
Re:
"He is just trying to make sure no one gives up before all avenues of a
"cure" or at least the a prolonging of life, with quality have been exhausted."
That was exactly my point. I sat here wondering if anyone "got it";
you have given me new hope.... (oh-ooh...?)
Seriously, thanks man !!
John
John, I "got it" after I think was your 5th post. The harshness had been eliminated and the true sensitive, caring, loving person that you are showed through.
Peace & love your way.
-Pat0 -
Thanks Chrisgreybeard64 said:touchy subject
Okay, you know me here are my two cents worth. I think, which is probably how most moronic statements on my part start but...I think John is not ripping on Hospice as much as he is trying desperately to keep people fighting. It sounds as if he has seen quite a few friends pass and it hurts. He is just trying to make sure no one gives up before all avenues of a "cure" or at least the a prolonging of life, with quality ahve been exhausted.
Enter all those who have witnessed in their eyes the seemingly endless struggle of a loved one, the pain, the loss of quality in their life. they're friend our loved ones are tired and it is a horrible thing to watch. Seems to me both sides are saying the same thing just from different perspectives so to speak. Fight the good fight, and exhaust all options (john) and from the others, there personal accounts seem to be that this is in fact what they're loved ones have done. For their own personal reasons and and they are similar and yet different in every case just as this disease is, they have reached a place where hospice is right for them. It boils down to each individual having the right to chose, and know one knows better then the person who is making that choice. Each of us have our own agenda when it comes to how we handle this and how we would like the people we care about to handle it, sometimes for our sake, and sometimes for theirs but the only person who is qualified to know when enough is enough is the person who is facing that decision for themselves. everyone who has been DX with this, makes decisions based on a wide variety of variables, and no one can fully understand the hows and whys of that process, except the person who is making them. If we arent making the decision it seems to me that the thing to do is respect their wishes, support them as best we can. And if and when we are faced with this difficult choice, I think it is our hope that those we love will do the same for us. right and wrong is not for us to decide it is for those who have the ultimate decision.
There is no doubt that each of us on here want everyone else to know we support them no matter there decision, after all none of us, although we share similar paths take this journey wearing the same moccasins as our friends.
bless you all
chris
Thanks Chris0
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