A Few New Year's Resolutions LOL

susie09
susie09 Member Posts: 2,930
edited March 2014 in Breast Cancer #1
Just for today, I will not sit in my living room all day in my nightdress. Instead, I will move my computer into the bedroom.


I will no longer waste my time relieving the past, instead I will spend it worrying about the future.


I will not bore my boss by with the same excuse for taking leaves. I will think of some more excuses.


I will do less laundry and use more deodorant.


I will avoid taking a bath whenever possible and conserve more water.


Assure my lawyer that I will never again show up drunk at a custody hearing.


I will give up chocolates totally. 100%. Completely. Honestly....


I will try to figure out why I *really* need nine e-mail addresses.


I will stop sending e-mails to my wife (husband).


I resolve to work with neglected children -- my own.


I will stop sending e-mail, ICQ, Instant Messages and be on the phone at the same time with the same person.


I will spend less than one hour a day on the Internet. This, of course, will be hard to estimate since I'm not a clock watcher.


I will read the manual... just as soon as I can find it.


I will think of a password other than "password."


I will not tell the same story at every get together.


I won't worry so much.


I will cut my hair.


I will grow my hair.


I will stop considering other people's feelings when they so obviously don't consider mine - if that unwashed fellow sits next to me again, I'll tell him he stinks!


I will be more imaginative.


I will not hang around girls - they think you love them and that sucks.


I will not ring the stewardess button on airplanes just to get her phone number.


Resolutions You Would be Tempted to Keep...
For those who are scared of making resolutions here are some resolutions they would actually be tempted to keep!!


Spend more time watching TV / movies.
Chat more over phone / Internet.
Read less.
I want to gain weight. Put on at least 30 pounds.
Stop exercising. Waste of time.
Procrastinate more.
Drink. Drink some more.
Start being superstitious.
Spend more less time at work.
Stop bringing lunch from home: I should eat out more.
Take up a new habit: Maybe smoking!


I hope you enjoyed these! Happy New Year Everyone!

♠♣ Susie ♠♣

Comments

  • DebbyM
    DebbyM Member Posts: 3,289 Member
    #2
    LOL
    I promise I will think of a new password other than password! HAHA! I know people that use that. Thanks Susie!

    Debby
  • survivorbc09
    survivorbc09 Member Posts: 4,374 Member
    #3
    DebbyM said:

    LOL
    I promise I will think of a new password other than password! HAHA! I know people that use that. Thanks Susie!

    Debby

    Funny
    I love these! Thanks!

    HUGS
  • fauxma
    fauxma Member Posts: 3,577 Member
    #4
    survivorbc09 said:

    Funny
    I love these! Thanks!

    HUGS

    Susie
    Those were very good.
    Susie

    Those were very good. LOL
    Stef
  • Kylez
    Kylez Member Posts: 3,761 Member
    #5
    survivorbc09 said:

    Funny
    I love these! Thanks!

    HUGS

    Thanks for the laugh today Susie!

    KYLEZ ♥
  • dmc_emmy
    dmc_emmy Member Posts: 549
    #6
    Kylez said:

    Thanks for the laugh today Susie!

    KYLEZ ♥

    I decided long ago to stop making New Year's resolutions, because they only lasted for a day or two anyway. I think it's best to see what changes I make in my life and then I can make that my resolution. It works and I feel soooo much better about myself that I actually made a "resolution" (be it after I made the "improvement" was done and often well into the new year) and I didn't have to undo something that I probably wouldn't have been able to keep doing anyway.

    That's the advantage of getting older, you can make anything sound wise (and if it doesn't, people won't tend to say anything cuz they feel sorry for you) LOL.

    That said, after some fantastic change happens in my life I'll key you in on what my New Year's Resolution is. okay? Get it "key you in"? haha Okay, it was a bad pun, I'll keep my day job.
    dmc
  • Marcia527
    Marcia527 Member Posts: 2,729
    #7
    My resolution was to put
    My resolution was to put away the Christmas stuff before I had to dust it. I put it all away today. Ok I confess. I made the resolution after I already put everything away. That's one way of making sure it gets done anyway.
  • jnl
    jnl Member Posts: 3,869 Member
    #8
    Marcia527 said:

    My resolution was to put
    My resolution was to put away the Christmas stuff before I had to dust it. I put it all away today. Ok I confess. I made the resolution after I already put everything away. That's one way of making sure it gets done anyway.

    LOL!
    Leeza

    LOL!


    Leeza
  • Megan M
    Megan M Member Posts: 3,000
    #9
    jnl said:

    LOL!
    Leeza

    LOL!


    Leeza

    Thanks for the resolutions!
    Thanks for the resolutions! LOL

    Megan
  • ladybug22
    ladybug22 Member Posts: 646
    #10
    Thanks for the resolutions!
    Loved the resolutions. my resolutions for this year is to be here next year. have a great year.

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