In Remission?

susie09
susie09 Member Posts: 2,930
edited March 2014 in Breast Cancer #1
What does being in remission mean to you? Are we all in remission? Is that what all of us

bc survivors are in? Remission? I thought cancer free meant just that, free of cancer. Not

in remission. Thanks! Susie
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Comments

  • Moopy23
    Moopy23 Member Posts: 1,751 Member
    #2
    I wonder, too
    I have wondered the same thing, Susie. Sadly, I have gotten the impression that the word to be used is remission. That is why, I suppose, we are all still "racing for the cure." I could ask my onc., but do not want to. (See what a chicken I am?!)
  • elm3544
    elm3544 Member Posts: 748
    #3
    Moopy23 said:

    I wonder, too
    I have wondered the same thing, Susie. Sadly, I have gotten the impression that the word to be used is remission. That is why, I suppose, we are all still "racing for the cure." I could ask my onc., but do not want to. (See what a chicken I am?!)

    I looked it up...
    "A period during which symptoms of disease are reduced (partial remission) or disappear (complete remission). With regard to cancer, remission means there is no sign of it on scans or when the doctor examines you. Doctors use the word 'remission' instead of cure when talking about cancer because they cannot be sure that there are no cancer cells at all in the body. So the cancer could come back in the future, although there is no sign of it at the time."
    I always thought it only had to do with Lukemia, guess I was wrong.
  • susie09
    susie09 Member Posts: 2,930
    #4
    elm3544 said:

    I looked it up...
    "A period during which symptoms of disease are reduced (partial remission) or disappear (complete remission). With regard to cancer, remission means there is no sign of it on scans or when the doctor examines you. Doctors use the word 'remission' instead of cure when talking about cancer because they cannot be sure that there are no cancer cells at all in the body. So the cancer could come back in the future, although there is no sign of it at the time."
    I always thought it only had to do with Lukemia, guess I was wrong.

    Ok, thank you elm. So then
    Ok, thank you elm. So then we are all in remission. I don't like that word :( But, at least, now it is cleared up and I undertand. Thanks!
  • tgf
    tgf Member Posts: 950 Member
    #5
    susie09 said:

    Ok, thank you elm. So then
    Ok, thank you elm. So then we are all in remission. I don't like that word :( But, at least, now it is cleared up and I undertand. Thanks!

    I'm with Moopy
    I'm also a chicken when it comes to asking my oncologist my "status." I did ask about the words "cured" and "remission" and he said I was in remission ... which makes sense because I guess they can NEVER say anyone with cancer is ever cured. But ... I'll settle for remission right now.

    The question I am afraid to as is "what is my prognosis?" Since I'm 65 ... part of me wants to know if everything looks good ... but part of me is scared he'd say something like ... "well ... you've got maybe a year at most" ... then I think I would really lose it. Part of me wants to know so I can get going on the "bucket list" ... and then part of me is afraid of what he might tell me.

    I'm sure I'm not alone in those feelings ... and I really don't know how I drifted off on to that depressing subject when we were really talking about something positive ... like remission. Guess it's just one of those times when my chemo brain is going in crazy directions.

    hugs.
    teena
  • lynn1950
    lynn1950 Member Posts: 2,570
    #6
    tgf said:

    I'm with Moopy
    I'm also a chicken when it comes to asking my oncologist my "status." I did ask about the words "cured" and "remission" and he said I was in remission ... which makes sense because I guess they can NEVER say anyone with cancer is ever cured. But ... I'll settle for remission right now.

    The question I am afraid to as is "what is my prognosis?" Since I'm 65 ... part of me wants to know if everything looks good ... but part of me is scared he'd say something like ... "well ... you've got maybe a year at most" ... then I think I would really lose it. Part of me wants to know so I can get going on the "bucket list" ... and then part of me is afraid of what he might tell me.

    I'm sure I'm not alone in those feelings ... and I really don't know how I drifted off on to that depressing subject when we were really talking about something positive ... like remission. Guess it's just one of those times when my chemo brain is going in crazy directions.

    hugs.
    teena

    I am so glad to hear that REMISSION is the new word and cure is not. I was bummed when I was told my cancer was in remission, so hearing that it is the word that's now used regarding our status is a good thing to me. Since I believe we all have cancer in our bodies, it is the ability of our bodies to keep it under control that is the issue for me. Anti-Cancer is a good book that talks about this.

    I'm betting if you had only a year, your doctor would let you know whether you asked or not! Knowing your prognosis is only a statistic, anyway. YOU are not a number! :) Lynn
  • taleena
    taleena Member Posts: 1,612 Member
    #7
    tgf said:

    I'm with Moopy
    I'm also a chicken when it comes to asking my oncologist my "status." I did ask about the words "cured" and "remission" and he said I was in remission ... which makes sense because I guess they can NEVER say anyone with cancer is ever cured. But ... I'll settle for remission right now.

    The question I am afraid to as is "what is my prognosis?" Since I'm 65 ... part of me wants to know if everything looks good ... but part of me is scared he'd say something like ... "well ... you've got maybe a year at most" ... then I think I would really lose it. Part of me wants to know so I can get going on the "bucket list" ... and then part of me is afraid of what he might tell me.

    I'm sure I'm not alone in those feelings ... and I really don't know how I drifted off on to that depressing subject when we were really talking about something positive ... like remission. Guess it's just one of those times when my chemo brain is going in crazy directions.

    hugs.
    teena

    Teena... regardless of the
    Teena... regardless of the answer that you would receive from the oncologist.... I do recommend a bucket list... to young... to old... to inbetween... our lives are worth living to the fullest everyday... We, as everyone else... are not guaranteed tomorrow... pursue those "I would love to things"... It will be worth telling the story 10 - 15 years from now...

    Hugs,

    ~T
  • Marcia527
    Marcia527 Member Posts: 2,729
    #8
    I wasn't told anything
    I wasn't told anything (remission or not) and a friend asked if I was in remission. I'd not heard that word at the time so I went back at my next visit and asked what he'd call my condition and he said "in remission". I told this to another friend of mine and she was horrified that he wouldn't tell me something good like that without prompting.
  • fauxma
    fauxma Member Posts: 3,577 Member
    #9
    taleena said:

    Teena... regardless of the
    Teena... regardless of the answer that you would receive from the oncologist.... I do recommend a bucket list... to young... to old... to inbetween... our lives are worth living to the fullest everyday... We, as everyone else... are not guaranteed tomorrow... pursue those "I would love to things"... It will be worth telling the story 10 - 15 years from now...

    Hugs,

    ~T

    I agree with you totally.
    I agree with you totally. Bucket lists should be something we all have. A list of the things that we want to do, accompolish, visit, love, etc. And we should work on our list everyday. Maybe we will never do all of the things but what fun we will have trying. My father died suddently in his sleep at the age of 48. He left a 43 year old widow with three chidren (13, 15 and 16). I wonder what he would have done differently if he had known at 47, he had only one more year. I know that he loved life and he was a happy, good man but I am also sure that he had things he was putting off to "one day". So I ask, What would be on your bucket lists"?
    Mine:
    To give more than I get
    To care more than I am cared for
    To love more than I am loved
    To live more in the moment
    To enjoy life to the fullest
    To get my hubby to retire
    To make this planet a better place for my children and grandchildren
    To be a good role model
    To get another job
    To go on vacation every year
    To see a cure for cancer

    I am sure I will add to this as time goes by.
    Okay, group, what's on your list?
    Stef
  • RE
    RE Member Posts: 4,591 Member
    #10
    My two cents
    My doctor has told me that once one has had cancer one can never be considered "cured". He explained to me that cancer can be in the blood stream and undetectable which is why "remission" is the word to use rather than "cured". It was explained to me that the farther away from your original dx you get the better off your odds are that you will remain in remission and will not have a recurrence. I suppose that is why I view cancer as a chronic illness that I have to be on my toes to catch early so that it does not get the best of me.

    I also agree that we should get out there and enjoy our lives with our loved ones, no one knows this better than those who have had to battle for their lives like we have had too.

    Much Love to all,

    RE
  • outdoorgirl
    outdoorgirl Member Posts: 1,565
    #11
    Susie
    I asked my chemo nurse if I could ever call myself cancer free and she said no.
    When my radiation onc was telling me about prognoseses after I was through with rads,he told me that no one can say how long they will live for-that he could get into a car accident and die on his way to work the next day. So when someone asks me how my health is,I say so far so good and leave it at that! And am thankful that I am NED-no evidence of disease (at least to my knowledge) for the present. And I try to enjoy each day as it comes!
    Love,
    Patty
  • Moopy23
    Moopy23 Member Posts: 1,751 Member
    #12
    lynn1950 said:

    I am so glad to hear that REMISSION is the new word and cure is not. I was bummed when I was told my cancer was in remission, so hearing that it is the word that's now used regarding our status is a good thing to me. Since I believe we all have cancer in our bodies, it is the ability of our bodies to keep it under control that is the issue for me. Anti-Cancer is a good book that talks about this.

    I'm betting if you had only a year, your doctor would let you know whether you asked or not! Knowing your prognosis is only a statistic, anyway. YOU are not a number! :) Lynn

    I feel better, too
    Thanks, Susie, for asking this question, and all for responding. The words of wisdom are very timely for me, especially. I am grateful to be with you all in remission, and may we stay there for many decades to come.
  • survivorbc09
    survivorbc09 Member Posts: 4,374 Member
    #13
    outdoorgirl said:

    Susie
    I asked my chemo nurse if I could ever call myself cancer free and she said no.
    When my radiation onc was telling me about prognoseses after I was through with rads,he told me that no one can say how long they will live for-that he could get into a car accident and die on his way to work the next day. So when someone asks me how my health is,I say so far so good and leave it at that! And am thankful that I am NED-no evidence of disease (at least to my knowledge) for the present. And I try to enjoy each day as it comes!
    Love,
    Patty

    Doctors can be so different.
    Doctors can be so different. My oncologist said I was cured. My radiation oncologist said I was cancer free. I am going with what they said! :)
  • Alexis F
    Alexis F Member Posts: 3,598
    #14
    survivorbc09 said:

    Doctors can be so different.
    Doctors can be so different. My oncologist said I was cured. My radiation oncologist said I was cancer free. I am going with what they said! :)

    I guess now when people ask
    I guess now when people ask my husband or I how I am doing, I can now say " I am in remission." But, I prefer cancer free too!
  • rjjj
    rjjj Member Posts: 1,822 Member
    #15
    what to say
    i am always at a loss of what to say. People always ask and it does bug me sometimes...the other day a woman i didn't know asked me what my prognosis was. I find that rude. I usually just say "hopefully it's gone."
  • Kristin N
    Kristin N Member Posts: 1,968 Member
    #16
    rjjj said:

    what to say
    i am always at a loss of what to say. People always ask and it does bug me sometimes...the other day a woman i didn't know asked me what my prognosis was. I find that rude. I usually just say "hopefully it's gone."

    We all are in remission then
    We all are in remission then I guess. I just never thought of that word associated with me before. Hmmmm
  • Akiss4me
    Akiss4me Member Posts: 2,188
    #17
    Kristin N said:

    We all are in remission then
    We all are in remission then I guess. I just never thought of that word associated with me before. Hmmmm

    I've decided....
    to just tell people that "I'm on hold". Since I have great experience being on hold my whole treatment with all the waiting, seemed like it would fit well. :) Pammy
  • dmc_emmy
    dmc_emmy Member Posts: 549
    #18
    tgf said:

    I'm with Moopy
    I'm also a chicken when it comes to asking my oncologist my "status." I did ask about the words "cured" and "remission" and he said I was in remission ... which makes sense because I guess they can NEVER say anyone with cancer is ever cured. But ... I'll settle for remission right now.

    The question I am afraid to as is "what is my prognosis?" Since I'm 65 ... part of me wants to know if everything looks good ... but part of me is scared he'd say something like ... "well ... you've got maybe a year at most" ... then I think I would really lose it. Part of me wants to know so I can get going on the "bucket list" ... and then part of me is afraid of what he might tell me.

    I'm sure I'm not alone in those feelings ... and I really don't know how I drifted off on to that depressing subject when we were really talking about something positive ... like remission. Guess it's just one of those times when my chemo brain is going in crazy directions.

    hugs.
    teena

    I was told that I would be in remission at the 5 yr mark (from date of surgery), providing no cancer is found.

    I also asked for my prognosis. I realize that these are only numbers, but I felt I needed to know so I could establish a timeline to "get my affairs in order" if it became necessary. Since I have a young daughter, I felt this was the responsible thing to do. Typically, I don't think about it, unless a challenge enters into my life. I intend to beat my stats and be around for a very long time. I plan to hold grandbabies, even though my daughter tells me that she will not be ready for babies for a good while. I plan...well, to simply to be around and live life as fully as I can and try to not think about "what ifs."

    When I am in remission, I will have a huge celebration party and you're all invited :D. When I graduate, if I graduate, with my Master's in English I will seek employment with colleges. When I retire, if I retire, I will pack my bags and head South. The "ifs" are not gloom and doom, they are reality and I have learned to deal with them (well, on most days).

    Teena, my dreams-your dreams-all of our dreams, are positive thoughts (but, now they are sprinkled with a little reality dust rather than just fairy dust). Hang in there.
    dmc
  • lynn1950
    lynn1950 Member Posts: 2,570
    #19
    Akiss4me said:

    I've decided....
    to just tell people that "I'm on hold". Since I have great experience being on hold my whole treatment with all the waiting, seemed like it would fit well. :) Pammy

    Pammy
    You are so smart! :) Lynn
  • DianeBC
    DianeBC Member Posts: 3,881 Member
    #20
    lynn1950 said:

    Pammy
    You are so smart! :) Lynn

    Remission, I thought meant you still had cancer, but, I guess not. It just means that you still might?
  • outdoorgirl
    outdoorgirl Member Posts: 1,565
    #21
    DianeBC said:

    Remission, I thought meant you still had cancer, but, I guess not. It just means that you still might?

    How does
    ACS feel about this or any of the other reputable cancer sites-do any of them give a definative answer?
    I'm going to ask my onc the next time I see him.

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