What the heck was I thinking !! that I was going to see the onc and rads man and they were going to tell me the cancer went away. I knew this was coming, I new it. I started talking so fast my husband asked me if I was on some kind of drug like speed. This was when the doctor left the room for a minute. My girlfriend was taking notes for me and she just looked at me like I was crazy. SO I looked at both of them and started to cry. I knew, why am I doing this I knew. The port is going in Monday. Yes, I saw the post on ports. Little worried. Get to be put to sleep again yea. The chemo will start july 8 for 3 maybe 6 months. Have it all down on paper just don't want to read it all right now. Being told once is enough for today. Herceptin weekly 52 weeks. Was asked to do a study. Its the Allto study. I have to tell them monday if I am going to do it or not. I think I will. Then to top it off Rads for 6 weeks everyday. after chemo is done. My answer to side affects was much more than I would have thought. Lets see, Heart failer, infection, call if fever is 100.5, Anemia,Bleeding, Menopause, Hair loss, nail problems oh i almost forgot nausea. She gave me 3 drugs for that to get filled. I am so sorry you guys, I know most of you have been through this and came out the other side, but, but I don't know what I am thinking. I am telling you it was like I expected something different, but I knew better. Crazy I guess. So I am going to a chemo class wednesday after they check the port. Yep I am going on a tour. They will answer anymore questions we might have, and they will then give us some hints and whatever. It's really nice to have that. I say us because there will be others with me. Chemo buddies. So thats it for now. Long afternoon, and bad storms today. Going to ask for xanax.