After Cancer.... Now What?

just4Brooks said:

By no means I'm I complaining
Just wanted to know if I was the only one with what seems to be so many problems. Hell yes I'm happy to be alive to kick some more butt and help the others fight!! Need to spend a day with Kerry and knock something down or maybe drive over a car. Gotta love each and every one of you.

Brooks

Not Negative but One's Own Reality
Very interesting responses on this thread...love to read everyone's perspective on this subject.

I don't see the responses as Negative, but rather as one of self-reflection and getting in touch with how one really feels.

And during the journey when you are in battle, things always look their darkest than when you've walked across the other side and can look back and reflect on what happened, what you did and what you've become.

Attitudes and opinions change also - this is especially true the longer the journey continues. I see things much differently in Year 6 than I did in my first year.

And the generations we were born into certainly make a difference...different times made different people. As men, we are programmed to be hard core and show no emotion and just show toughness and hardness. I can certainly be as hard as anyone and talk chit all day long. But for me, it's been important to take a look at myself and realize that I have feelings as well on a different level and am able to acknowledge that publically and I don't feel it makes me any less of a man or a fighter.

Enough years have gone by that I am now slowly seeing the reality of how things are and how they might turn out to be - I still have to work for a living and that takes alot of quality time off the table. I seem to fight Cancer and then return to work. Sometimes, that seems fruitless and not self-fulfilling but I gotta' keep cornbread on the table and the lightbulbs plugged in, or we've really got problems.

I wish I could just walk away, fight my fight and then spend the rest of my life helping others and make more contributions to society with the days I've been provided. In and around work, I have been doing this.

I think that once we get through this, we think things might go easier on us, but we know that is not the case. We have to fight very hard to get back to where we were - which is where the normal folks are living - our days are just a little more challenging than your average bear, as Yogi Bear used to say.

To answer your questions Brooks - what do we do After? We just get up and go after it again, for it's the hope of another day that is like the carrot on the stick, ever leading us forward, in hopes of better times.

And in and around all of this, we get a good slice of life in whatever form - we savor and enjoy it and then we get back to the business at hand.

-Craig

Sundanceh said:

Not Negative but One's Own Reality
Very interesting responses on this thread...love to read everyone's perspective on this subject.

I don't see the responses as Negative, but rather as one of self-reflection and getting in touch with how one really feels.

And during the journey when you are in battle, things always look their darkest than when you've walked across the other side and can look back and reflect on what happened, what you did and what you've become.

Attitudes and opinions change also - this is especially true the longer the journey continues. I see things much differently in Year 6 than I did in my first year.

And the generations we were born into certainly make a difference...different times made different people. As men, we are programmed to be hard core and show no emotion and just show toughness and hardness. I can certainly be as hard as anyone and talk chit all day long. But for me, it's been important to take a look at myself and realize that I have feelings as well on a different level and am able to acknowledge that publically and I don't feel it makes me any less of a man or a fighter.

Enough years have gone by that I am now slowly seeing the reality of how things are and how they might turn out to be - I still have to work for a living and that takes alot of quality time off the table. I seem to fight Cancer and then return to work. Sometimes, that seems fruitless and not self-fulfilling but I gotta' keep cornbread on the table and the lightbulbs plugged in, or we've really got problems.

I wish I could just walk away, fight my fight and then spend the rest of my life helping others and make more contributions to society with the days I've been provided. In and around work, I have been doing this.

I think that once we get through this, we think things might go easier on us, but we know that is not the case. We have to fight very hard to get back to where we were - which is where the normal folks are living - our days are just a little more challenging than your average bear, as Yogi Bear used to say.

To answer your questions Brooks - what do we do After? We just get up and go after it again, for it's the hope of another day that is like the carrot on the stick, ever leading us forward, in hopes of better times.

And in and around all of this, we get a good slice of life in whatever form - we savor and enjoy it and then we get back to the business at hand.

-Craig

Craig, Write that book,
make your millions + you can do whatever you want.

AnneCan said:

Craig, Write that book,
make your millions + you can do whatever you want.

Yep, yep....me too
Yep, and ever since I stopped working I feel worse

My feet hurt
My hands, arms and shoulders hurt
My stomach is bloated
I have gas, that my 2 year old grand daughter says "poochi Nana," as she hold her nose. Dang Papa!
My short term memory is now horrible
My tummy is sore, can't just sit up anymore, or get up easily.

My back hurts.

I am stiff, and my eye sight sucks. I cough all night and can't sleep.

The only thing holding up is my face.

But, I am glad to be alive!

It's only the depth that varies.
Long term survival summed up in six words.......Ron.

ktlcs said:

Forgive Me
I know you've all been through a lot..more than anyone should have to, and I pray you never have to again but..

A different perspective
I am not sick
I have my money
I have my memory
I do not pysically ache all over

The cancer took my husband..I have nothing

Thank you all
this has been a helpfull thread for me, because sometimes you think you are the only one feeling this way. I also wrote a long reply yesterday, erased it and read the new thoughts today and the one from ktlcs hit home the most, what if I lost my spouse, child, grandchild, that would be the worst, more than my mortality. So thanks, that put it back in perspective for me. Also, I just think our ages have something to do with how we handle this horror, I would probably be reacting different if I were 40 and not 67. I will handle the pain in my side, dr. appointments today, colonoscopy next month, 6 month c scans and onc appoint end of Oct. much better for reading your thoughts, Thanks again. Pat

KathiM said:

6 years this Thanksgiving...3 words....
(Oh, no it's that dammed perky broad again!!!!)

I was told, at that point, I had 6 months to live....

Yes, there are many physical changes I still deal with (sorry, y'all, but it's true). Some days, knowing that I'm going to pay, I indulge in a 'sin' food...yogurt, a big frosty glass of milk.

My 'key to happiness' is acceptance. And knowing when and where I can push the envelope. (At Sail Amsterdam, I was on a small tug boat, with a smaller toilet, and on the water for 5 hours. I nibbled stuff, but didn't eat much...didn't want to have a problem).

My fav expression, and mantra on those days I hate all that has happened to me, is 'It is what it is'. Living, even with my 'quirks', is better than the alternative...

In the 6 years since hearing those words, I have met many wonderful (and some not so wonderful) people. I have had to say goodbye to my daughter, my ex-, my beau's mom and dad. I became caregiver to my beau as he lay dying in the hospital from a bad heart and bad medicine. I am now having to deal with my mom's safety, she can no longer live alone.

BUT, I have seen grand things, and things that bring joy to my soul. I have met many warriors, as well as movers and shakers. In the final analysis yes, it truely IS 'All about me'!!!!

BIG hugs to all of you....special hugs for those of you that are struggling...attend a Colonpalooza one time...you will be so inspired!!!!

Hugs, Kathi

Ron
Ron if you are still on this thread,,,,could you please help me to understand what you mean by " it's only the depth that varies"

thanks mate,

mags

After Cancer
Yes I do, I just figured I should keep my mouth shut and be happy. My 1 year check in April was good, colonoscopy found small polyp, removed and blood work ok. I don't go back for 6 months.

But,

Fatigue, neuropathy, weight problems, short term memory problems, bowel problems, and just feel down. This posting has helped me, just to know I'm not alone. I don't post much, but I do read almost every day. There are so many people worse off than me, so why do I feel the way I do? As you, I do thank God I'm cancer free for now, but man, some days are hard.

Dave

ktlcs said:

Forgive Me
I know you've all been through a lot..more than anyone should have to, and I pray you never have to again but..

A different perspective
I am not sick
I have my money
I have my memory
I do not pysically ache all over

The cancer took my husband..I have nothing

sorry
I just wanted to say that I am very sorry for your pain. I know that my husband means the world to me and helped me so much throughout my struggle with "the beast". I am sure your husband felt the same way and was very grateful to have you. So, you have that..You made a difference in his life. I hope things get easier for you as time goes by.

That's what l though last year when NED
now in recurrence l regret didn't enjoy enough those days because same issues as you are having, so my suggestion is ;after cancer enjoy you are NED all the issues will improve soon, !.
Cheer up!

Sundanceh said:

Not Negative but One's Own Reality
Very interesting responses on this thread...love to read everyone's perspective on this subject.

I don't see the responses as Negative, but rather as one of self-reflection and getting in touch with how one really feels.

And during the journey when you are in battle, things always look their darkest than when you've walked across the other side and can look back and reflect on what happened, what you did and what you've become.

Attitudes and opinions change also - this is especially true the longer the journey continues. I see things much differently in Year 6 than I did in my first year.

And the generations we were born into certainly make a difference...different times made different people. As men, we are programmed to be hard core and show no emotion and just show toughness and hardness. I can certainly be as hard as anyone and talk chit all day long. But for me, it's been important to take a look at myself and realize that I have feelings as well on a different level and am able to acknowledge that publically and I don't feel it makes me any less of a man or a fighter.

Enough years have gone by that I am now slowly seeing the reality of how things are and how they might turn out to be - I still have to work for a living and that takes alot of quality time off the table. I seem to fight Cancer and then return to work. Sometimes, that seems fruitless and not self-fulfilling but I gotta' keep cornbread on the table and the lightbulbs plugged in, or we've really got problems.

I wish I could just walk away, fight my fight and then spend the rest of my life helping others and make more contributions to society with the days I've been provided. In and around work, I have been doing this.

I think that once we get through this, we think things might go easier on us, but we know that is not the case. We have to fight very hard to get back to where we were - which is where the normal folks are living - our days are just a little more challenging than your average bear, as Yogi Bear used to say.

To answer your questions Brooks - what do we do After? We just get up and go after it again, for it's the hope of another day that is like the carrot on the stick, ever leading us forward, in hopes of better times.

And in and around all of this, we get a good slice of life in whatever form - we savor and enjoy it and then we get back to the business at hand.

-Craig

double post
must be the percocet....:-)