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A difficult post

Editgrl's picture
Posts: 903
Joined: Jun 2015

This is the most difficult news I've had to share on this board.  With tears in my eyes and deep sadness in my heart, I have to tell you all that Helen, daylady, passed away on Monday.

I last heard from her last week.  The fatigue she described in her last post had not improved nor had her appetite.  In addition, what seemed to be lymphedema had made her legs and abdomen swollen.  She said that she felt she was in someone else's body.

According to her husband, she went to the ER on Sunday night.  There were multiple issues, and in the end, her body just had too much to deal with.

Though Helen and I lived only a couple of hours away from each other, we met halfway around the world in Germany, kindred spirits in a foreign land.  There are no words to describe how much I will miss her spirit, her laugh, and her determination. She was a sounding board, a cheerleader, a confidant. I cannot believe that she is gone.

Rest in peace, dear one.  

CheeseQueen57's picture
Posts: 936
Joined: Feb 2016

i have to admit, this is the hardest part of being a part of this board. But the Fellowship outweighs the anguish so I continue to lurk. My heart is completely broken for her family and friends as well as for all of us who had the pleasure of knowing her virtually. Thanks for letting us know, Chris. 

Posts: 308
Joined: Oct 2017

I am so sorry to hear that. I was hoping that she would get her strength back and have a lovely Thanksgiving with her kids and grandkids. My heart breaks for them. From her posts it sounds like she has accomplished a ton, loved and was loved, and lived a very full life. That's all we can hope for, isn't it? With or without the cancer diagnosis. 

Posts: 1148
Joined: Jun 2016

Helen was so generous with everyone even though she was coping with so much. She really wanted to have this holiday season with her family and the timing of her passing is going to be so hard for them. I really wish this had turned out different for her; she certainly did everything possible to have that result. She was a lovely person and the world is a little sadder place now without her. My condolences to you too Chris; it's got to be harder to absorb this when the relationship got to be in person and you are struggling with metastasis yourself. Sending you a big ((hug)).

derMaus's picture
Posts: 561
Joined: Nov 2016

Dammit, this wasn't supposed to happen. Helen was supposed to rally, enjoy the holidays with her family, and go on to the next, best treatment. We were supposed to continue enjoying her company for years and years. I'm shocked and saddened that the story I worked out in my head isn't the story we get in reality. She was such a vital force on this board and her voice will be missed by everyone. Condolences to her family, and to you too Chris - I know how close you were and I'm so sorry you had to get the news from her husband. Thank you for letting us know. 

NoTimeForCancer's picture
Posts: 2892
Joined: Mar 2013

Chris, thank you for sharing the sad news with all of us.  My eyes are welling up with tears thinking how it is just can't be real.  This is hard, but why we need each other.  I pray for a cure for all cancers. 

Soup52's picture
Posts: 906
Joined: Jan 2016

Oh Chris this is so hard:( Helen fought so valiantly ! She will be so missed! I know this has to be especially hard for you after your trips to Germany. Prayers for you and for us all!

henhill's picture
Posts: 123
Joined: Aug 2016

Thank you for letting us know, I just sent a note last night.  So sorry to have missed wishing her well, and I offer you solidarity in our struggle with mets.

















Posts: 274
Joined: Oct 2017

I'm so sorry. I haven't been here long, but read her post the other day, and hoped she would have a wonderful holiday with her family. 

Lou Ann M's picture
Lou Ann M
Posts: 996
Joined: Feb 2015

it is so sad to look se yet another friend.  What a fighter she was.

Hugs and prayers, Lou Ann

Posts: 263
Joined: Jan 2016

Helen was such a fighter, I can't believe this happened.  It is so sad she is no longer with us.
But she's in good hands with the angels.




Posts: 102
Joined: Jan 2016

Thank you for letting us know about Helen's passing, Chris. It is difficult news indeed. 

Posts: 800
Joined: May 2016

So sad to hear.

TeddyandBears_Mom's picture
Posts: 1792
Joined: Jun 2015

Oh Chris. This is heartbreaking. I just can't find the words right now....

Rest in peace sweet Helen.

Love and Hugs to All ,


EZLiving66's picture
Posts: 1478
Joined: Oct 2015




Abbycat2's picture
Posts: 644
Joined: Feb 2014

This is the most difficult part of being a member of this Board. Like a child who believes in fairy tales and “happy endings“, I want so very much for each of us to remain healthy and strong. It breaks my heart to know that Helen didn't get to spend the holidays with her family. My condolences to you, Chris, who met her and to her supportive and loving family. My Dad died 4 years ago tomorrow and right after I received my UPSC diagnosis. Thanksgiving and my birthday towards the end of November seem less joyful to me ever since.

Warm Wishes,


Posts: 266
Joined: Apr 2011

Hi Chris:  I am so sorry to hear of Helen's passing.  I will keep Helen in my thoughts and prayers. I feel so bad for her family and that she will not be able to spend the upcoming holidays with them.  May she rest in peace.  Helen fought our disease valiantly and traveled so far to get help with the disease.

On another sad note, I lost my first cousin 5 years ago today to brain cancer (glioblastoma) he fought the disease for almost 2 1/2 years.  He was young only 73. I still miss him a lot and think of him.  He enjoyed travelling a lot and took a lot of cruises. He lived in Maryland about 2 hours from me, and he came down a couple of times a year to visit with my Mom and myself and took us out to lunch along with his younger brother.  I know of a couple of famous people that have had this type of brain cancer and that is a rare cancer as well. 

Chris, it will be hard for you as well.  I will keep you in my prayers also.


a/k/a Jane

Posts: 36
Joined: Jun 2017

With all my heart I believe we come from God (SWT) and we return to Him.  It is a wonderful plan.  We can only grieve and miss someone if we feel love for them and for others that do.  Love exposes us to the pain of loss, but it's temporary.  I think we will one day have the joy of meeting eachother and will realize how worth it love really is.

Double Whammy's picture
Double Whammy
Posts: 2831
Joined: Jun 2010

  So difficult to read this, but thank you, Chris, for posting.


Anonymous user (not verified)

I don't often write anymore, but she and Editgirl inspired me with their Germany treatment.  Damn Damn, I though she had beaten it.  I PM'd her in September telling her how inspiring she was, I was facing a scare, and her posts and treatments had given me hope.  I am numb, thinking about all you wonderful ladies past and present, many of who I went through treatment with, only to have them face more devistating news.  I'm OK, my liver mass was written off as benign mass, but I know it's only a day, week, month away from striking me!  I can only offer prayers for Daylady, and all of us.  Love and peace Nancy.

EZLiving66's picture
Posts: 1478
Joined: Oct 2015

Nancy, I'm glad to hear from you!! But I'm glad to hear you're doing ok. Please keep us updated.



DrienneB's picture
Posts: 186
Joined: Aug 2013

I am so sorry to hear this.  Helen seemed like such a great person and inspired me. 



Posts: 263
Joined: Aug 2016

My heart feels so heavy. Helen was a source of inspiration and encouragement to me. When she went to Germany to receive her treatment, I had high hopes for her! But this type of aggressive cancer just doesn't seem to go away, and it breaks my heart that she wasn't able to beat it, of no fault of her own. I hate this cancer!

When she posted on the second this month, I knew she was discouraged and her PET scans showed activity, but I didn't know it had progressed so far or so quickly. She did mention she didn't have much of an appetite, but I was still hoping she would be able to get treated in combination with her naturopath and oncologist with positive results. It just makes me sad that this cancer seems to progress so quickly and that Helen wasn't able to recuperate.

I am truly distressed. Helen will be sorely missed. She was so active in this board and I always looked forward to her updates.

With a heavy heart,

Kaleena's picture
Posts: 2064
Joined: Nov 2009

I just logged in and am sadden to hear the pasing of Helen (Daylady).   I am sorry for your loss, Chris.   I also feel bad as she was looking forward to spending time with her family coming in for Thanksgiving.  So sad.

Hugs and prayers.


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