Surgery tomorrow scared
tomorrow is doomsday how my husband calls it! We are to arrive at 7.30 to have the embolization done and then his surgery to remove his kidney and that nasty evil 15cm tumour! we are both scared! He keeps crying and I am just secretly hiding my tears cause I am trying to be strong for him and our 3 kids! I will be waiting in the hospital during the surgery! I am so scared of the moment they take him! There is this what if in my head and it makes me crazy! He is so scared!
Comments
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It's perfectly normal to be
It's perfectly normal to be scared. If you weren't, I'd be a heck of a lot more concerned about that. Best wishes for a great outcome.
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Hi again Evelyn
I'll be thinking of you tomorrow.
The surgery will go well. Our medical systems and staff are really good at this sort of thing.
But waiting will be hard on you. The hospital might have some staff or volunteers who can wait with you and maybe help with the kids.
I'd come and sit with you myself but I'm just too far away. I'm there in spirit, though.
Steve.
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I know all too well what you
I know all too well what you're feeling and thinking. It's nerve racking to put it mildly. But......when that surgeon comes out to tell you "He did great, we got it all and he''s going to be well." You will find yourself able to breath again.
My wife is 20 days post surgery today. She's doing well and is going to go in to work for a little while today. Remember.....we're here if you need us.
He'll do fine. Keep us posted......wishing you guys the best.
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Sweet, Evelyn, glad you came
Sweet, Evelyn, glad you came to us to let us support YOU through this scary time. We're always here for you and your hubby!! Wish I could be with you tomorrow, so think of me there, with my arm around you, finding ways to distract, laugh and cry together!!
There in spirit~
Healing hugs, Jan
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Thank you all so much for your kind words!
you are all so amazing! I don't really know how I will get through tomorrow and also tonight! I am just so so scared that something will go wrong because all the docs say that it's very risky because of the size of the tumour! I am just so so worried!
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Oh dear, that is doctor talk
Oh dear, that is doctor talk allowing you to know he'll have a bit of a challenge with his surgical skills due to this size. Let me tell you that my brother in law had a MASSIVE tumor envelping his whole kidney and he did fine. 20 years later he's doing very well in his life with never, ever any complications. He did have an "open" incision, due to the size, but back then they did not offer robatic surgery.
Trust in the skills of this surgeon, pray for him and his staff. Trust your "faith" whatever that may be. Will you have anyone with you?
Do "centered breathing" exercises.
Jan
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As they tell us it is openJan4you said:Oh dear, that is doctor talk
Oh dear, that is doctor talk allowing you to know he'll have a bit of a challenge with his surgical skills due to this size. Let me tell you that my brother in law had a MASSIVE tumor envelping his whole kidney and he did fine. 20 years later he's doing very well in his life with never, ever any complications. He did have an "open" incision, due to the size, but back then they did not offer robatic surgery.
Trust in the skills of this surgeon, pray for him and his staff. Trust your "faith" whatever that may be. Will you have anyone with you?
Do "centered breathing" exercises.
Jan
As they tell us it is open surgery! 40cm incision! just cause of the size of the tumour! I won't have anyone there but myself! But I will try the breathing! I am so distraight but I can't break down for him and the kids!
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Also the length of the
Also the length of the surgery scares me... 4-6 hours... so so long!
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Make sure he gets one of
Make sure he gets one of those lumbar, velcro wraps used for low back problems. I have used it several surgeries. It supports those tender, sore muscles as they heal. It helped me get UP from a chair/bed more easily. I even wore it to bed. AND I would place dry ice packs inside over the larger incision (had laproscopic incisions) and it helped reduce the swelling=lessened the pain.
Well, I will be "with you" in spirit dear, Evenlyn. You feel anyway you want, get those emotions OUT!
Healing hugs, Jan
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Thank you so much for theJan4you said:Make sure he gets one of
Make sure he gets one of those lumbar, velcro wraps used for low back problems. I have used it several surgeries. It supports those tender, sore muscles as they heal. It helped me get UP from a chair/bed more easily. I even wore it to bed. AND I would place dry ice packs inside over the larger incision (had laproscopic incisions) and it helped reduce the swelling=lessened the pain.
Well, I will be "with you" in spirit dear, Evenlyn. You feel anyway you want, get those emotions OUT!
Healing hugs, Jan
Thank you so much for the advice! I will make sure he has one! I wonder how long they keep him in the hospital! They said 3-5 days... seemed so short to me!
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Yes it seems short stay, BUT
Yes it seems short stay, BUT as long as he can do his bodily functions (once catheter is out) and can walk, pain under control, its best to recoup at home. Hospitals do not let you rest! You are on their schedule. Just when you can finally sleep/rest, someone will come in to do or say something. He will also have those squeezing devices on legs to prevent clots, at least first day or so. They have a pump he'll hear when they squeeze. Some folks hate it, I loved it,made my legs feel good. I eventually got used to that sound.
He'll also be on a pain pump first day at least. He just has to press a button to get extra push of the dose of morphine or fetanyl. Also he has versed in his general anesthesia which has amnesiac features as side effects. So it may seem like he forgets what you just said or what he just said, but that will wear off soon. My sister does a whole routine on how people like me act when on Versed. LOL. But I "forgot" I had a button to push for pain pump!!
Use the email portion of this site if you want further information or more personal talk. I will support you anytime!
Jan
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We will be here for you toAs they tell us it is open
As they tell us it is open surgery! 40cm incision! just cause of the size of the tumour! I won't have anyone there but myself! But I will try the breathing! I am so distraight but I can't break down for him and the kids!
We will be here for you to talk to during his surgery, if you like. I went through my husband's surgery alone and, while it wasn't fun, I just tried to have courage but it was tough. And, if you're like me, your husband is the one you lean on in your times of worry but now you also have all of us here on this forum. The whole motley crew of us!!
He will be fine, you will be fine and your kids will be fine.
We will be praying for you guys!! Hang in there!!
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Sending good wishes for tomorrow
look at it this way; tomorrow he will be rid of that nasty tumor! I remember my 5 weeks wait like a nightmare but when the day for the surgery arrived, I was sooo ready! I don't mean I was not a bit scared, it feels surreal but I was realieved of having it come out! Trust the medical team's skills and try as much as you possibly can to relax while waiting. I trust to hear good news from you very, very soon!
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Get through tomorrow - first!
My tumor was 14.5, they removed it, my left kidney, and 8 inches of my colon - all at the same time! Yes - it was scary and yes my wife and I cried - but just think about getting tomorrow done with, then tackle the recovery, then getting back home, then getting to your "new normal". Surgery was 5 years ago for me and I am feeling fine. My scar is probably 30cm and I was home after 5 days in the hospital.
Stay strong! He's gonna need you!
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It is very natural to be
It is very natural to be nervous.
I am a 62 year old woman who is now 6 days post surgery and I was a total mess prior. I had a 7.7 cm tumor that was removed along with the right kidney. The waiting was the worst part. My family was my rock during that difficult time. I knew they were very scared too but they held it together for me. Your husband needs you to be strong for him and the children. Take deep breaths and keep in mind that by tomorrow this time, surgery will be over, the tumor will be gone and he will be on the road to recovery.
I am doing very well and saw my surgeon for a follow-up this morning. He was amazed at how far I've come in just 6 days. Recovery is hard at times but attitude means everything.
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