CSN Login
Members Online: 12

You are here

Journey beginning - emotional today.

Jacjac2's picture
Jacjac2
Posts: 44
Joined: Feb 2016

 Sitting home after recovering from a laparoscopic biopsy.   Still cannot wrap my head around this reoccurring uterine cancer. This is been going on now for three months the last word given to me was stage four.  My chemo starts this Thursday I kind of get the impression that this is just a treatment not really a cure for me that's what scares me.  The oncologist told my husband losing my hair is prettier good chance I got it cut short today and that was emotional.   During the laparoscopic procedure one of the incisions had to be made larger as she took out an entire tumor to confirm diagnosis. Between that my port being put in about two weeks ago and I'm going testing I'm really tired already just from being Sticht poked prodded .   Currently I'm having to take a shot a day to prevent blood clotting. I know it's different for everyone but I just want to know common things to look for as I begin this .    Today is my emotional day any feedback would be greatly appreciated. 

Editgrl's picture
Editgrl
Posts: 903
Joined: Jun 2015

So sorry you are going through this, but I am very glad that you found this board.  This is a group of strong compassionate women.  Feel free to vent, cry, scream, and ask any questions you may have. 

What kind of uterine cancer do you have?  You say that you are beginning chemo on Thursday.  Do you know what drugs they are giving you?  As you already know, everyone's experience with chemo is different, depending on the drugs used and the individuality of our own bodies, but there are some common side effects that many women have to a lesser or greater degree.

There is a thread called "Ladies going through chemo" that may help you. There are lots of tips there for dealing with the various side effects,

Fatigue, nausea, constipation or diarrhea, joint pain, neuropathy (tingling, numbness, pain in fingers & toes).  

As far as the stage of your cancer, there are ladies here with Stage IV that are doing very well.  I'm sure they will chime in.  

It's okay to be scared and emotional, but you can get through this.  You are stronger than you think.

Chris

BC Brady's picture
BC Brady
Posts: 70
Joined: May 2015

Jac - Chris is RIGHT! You ARE stronger than you even know. One year ago tomorrow, I was going through a similar situation. I, too am stage 4, and in a year's time I have been clear (August) and I have had a reoccurrence. (October) Here's how I get through the days - I vsualize that cartoon of Snoopy and Charlie Brown - Snoopy says, "Someday we will all die" - and Charlie Brown says, "Yes, but until then, we will LIVE". And that's what I try to do - live. Sleep is your healing agent. I am doing pretty darn well, and I think you can, too. Surround yourself with people who believe you can make it. To me, after the operations are done, it's all about the medicine. It's a mental game now. My husband and I have begun to pray together at night. It helps me stay focused on my recovery and also gives me the opportunity to pray for others who are suffering - I can't tell you how much this has helped me. I feel like I'm taking charge over this cancer - I'm telling this chemo to get to work! GET IT DONE! We have lives to live! You are allowed to feel horrible - you are allowed to be angry - this is a ridiculous disease that none of us deserves. Our womanly bodies are trying to kill us - and we are not going to let that happen! The staging is scary, but it just means that we will have the biggest victory in the end. And they do re-stage after your treatments are done - so try not to dwell on the stage. My tricks for getting through each chemo round are as follows:

1. Sleep when needed the first 2 days after chemo - take half a xanax if necessary to quiet the nerves and relax. This helps me to relax enough to go to the bathroom too. 

2. Take the anti nausea - zofran works best for me. Although the nausea has not been too bad.

3. Muscle aches and belly aches seem better when I walk the driveway - I can do a mile in circles and pray, cry, plan, think, meditate. I have been able to avoid many total meltdowns with walking. 

I am believing in you - and so is every woman on this blog - we are holding each other up. HUGS - 

Love and Healing,

Billie

Jacjac2's picture
Jacjac2
Posts: 44
Joined: Feb 2016

Had uterine stage 2c almost 7 years ago. Have not had any issue. They are calling it recurrent endometrial. The other was red used in test results is Adenocarconoma. Like I stated all new to me. I had a colonoscopy Nov 5, that is where it was discovered. Metastasized to several areas, colon, liver, and upper abdomen. 

EZLiving66's picture
EZLiving66
Posts: 1370
Joined: Oct 2015

I am so sorry the cancer has come back.  Did you have a total hysterectomy seven years ago with chemo and/or radiation?  

This is a good place to be if you have questions or just want to rage at the world.

Love,

Eldri

Kvdyson's picture
Kvdyson
Posts: 789
Joined: Jan 2016

I don't have much information to provide to you since this is only my first go-around with the monster but I did want to express that I am sending thoughts of healing and strength to you during this difficult time. Please let us know how you are doing.

Lou Ann M's picture
Lou Ann M
Posts: 996
Joined: Feb 2015

sorry you have to join us, but glad you found us.  This is a great place to be.  You will find information and encouragement.  It is also a good place to vent when you need to, and nothing is off limits.  "Ladies going through chemo" is a good thread to read through.  It will give you a lot of advise.  I am stage 4 and was diagnosed in Aug. 2012.  Had my 1st recurrence in Dec. 2013 and a second in Sept. 2014.  Tomorrow I am scheduled for Chemo #29.  I have many more good days than bad, and I plan to be around for a long time. And live each day that God gives me. 

It is Ok to be emotional and scared.  This is a scary thing, but you nwill find that you are much stronger than you ever thought you could be.

Hugs and prayers, Lou Ann 

NoTimeForCancer's picture
NoTimeForCancer
Posts: 2645
Joined: Mar 2013

jacjac, my heart aches for you.  I am so glad some of our fabulous warriors have chimed in to share their experiences on this dark day for you.  It is ok to feel everything you are feeling, but please know you are not alone.  There is a world of women here who are happy to listen the days you want to cry, scream, anything.

We are here for you.  

Hugs

Jacjac2's picture
Jacjac2
Posts: 44
Joined: Feb 2016

thank you for taking the time. I have not been in any type of forum in years. I see you have been on here for some time.  I hope to be able to share good experiences with others. 

TeddyandBears_Mom's picture
TeddyandBears_Mom
Posts: 1577
Joined: Jun 2015

Like other ladies have said... This is a wonderful group of women to be a part of. Everyone is open, warm and willing to share their experiences.

So sorry you are going through this. And, you WILL be able to share with others too!

I'm glad you found us.

Love and Hugs,

Cindi

Sandy3185's picture
Sandy3185
Posts: 228
Joined: Oct 2013

Jacjac, what a devastating blow! At seven years you must have been sure that you had said a permanent goodbye to cancer. I hope your husband is supportive and can help you through this. Don't be afraid to put yourself first- sleep as much as you can, try to eat and, above all, stay hydrated. I know that I had problems with dizziness and fainting that were caused by dehydration. and please, let your doctor know if you are having any unexpected or severe reactions to your chemo.  You can do this! Sandy

 

Gardena
Posts: 102
Joined: Jan 2016

I understand feeling tired of being poked and prodded and stitched! This process is so physically invasive and emotionally draining. But you are stronger than you know. You can not only endure this journey back to health, you can thrive. It's one foot in front of the other, one step at a time. You can do this. And this wonderful group of women will walk beside you. Sending you ((((big hugs)))). 

Donswife48
Posts: 306
Joined: Nov 2015

Recurrance is a word that seems to be common in UPSC.  I'm so sorry you have this new diagnosis.  I'm just learning about our cancer, mine is stage 3. After my surgery my doctor said immediately that this is a sneaky cancer and has a high recurrance rate.  Boy he wasn't kidding.  But I do believe you (& possibly me) will beat it back.  The fact that each year, some cancers have new therapies gives me hope.  Although from everything I read, apparently the standard treatment for first line UPSC is the same as it was back in the "90's.  I do know they are coming up with some testing of the tumors to give them a targeted therapy.  Have they done any of that?  Hang in there, I'm sending you all my hugs today.  Nancy

Soup52's picture
Soup52
Posts: 902
Joined: Jan 2016

Your case sounds similar to mine. I have one more internal radiation and then will see oncologist on the 11th when I believe he will say I should get the port before radiation. You said you were getting treatment to prevent blood clots. I had the shots after the surgery, but nothing now. Blood clots are a big concern for me as I had a pulmonary embolism 8 1/2 years ago a week after surgery when I donated a kidney to my daughter. I'm not looking forward to the hair loss either. Im not sure if my treatment is considered a cure either. I am clear cell grade 3C.

i have only posted here once before and probably in the wrong place as no one has acknowledged me.

Soup52's picture
Soup52
Posts: 902
Joined: Jan 2016

oops I meant before chemo not radiation. I should proofread!

ConnieSW's picture
ConnieSW
Posts: 1456
Joined: Jun 2012

sorry I missed your first post.  Glad you tried again.  Welcome to the group.

Soup52's picture
Soup52
Posts: 902
Joined: Jan 2016

Thank you! I've had trouble logging in because I keep forgetting the password. I finally put it in my notes

Donswife48
Posts: 306
Joined: Nov 2015

The hair loss wasn't as big of a deal as I thought it would be.  I got mine cut short before chemo, then had it shaved right before it should have started to fall out.  I ended up with a case of folliculitis after chemo, which I thought was due to the shaving, but since I have a new case of it after my third chemo treatment, I believe it is due to my immune system being low.  I have wigs (which I don't wear), really fun hats, which I do wear some of the time, but the most comfortable to me are pretied scarves.  Once I got past the "60"s look" (reminds of of my mom with a head scarf) I think I look fine.  And I often go without anything but a smile.  No one stares, everyone smiles back, and people say hi when passing.  I'm most concerned about getting my cancer cured, I believe I can live with the side effects, but I read from a lot of these wonderful women that cure is probably not a word to use, but stable, NED are!  Please post away Soup, we're here.  Hugs Nancy

Soup52's picture
Soup52
Posts: 902
Joined: Jan 2016

i know the hair thing isn't my biggest concern. I just want to live! I am concerned about the lymphodema the dr said I would get but I don't believe I have yet. No one told me what to do about it and I know once you have it it won't really go away. Sorry, I'm a little vain and my legs are one of my better body parts, lol.

Gardena
Posts: 102
Joined: Jan 2016

Welcome to this site. Really great information and support here; sorry we all have to meet under these circumstances,  just shows good can come out of bad. 

I thought I was fine w losing my hair, and during the two days it fell out in clumps was memorizing to me. But once I looked like a plucked chicken I asked my husband to give me a buzz cut. He gives himself a buzz cut every other week so is familiar with the job. I thought I would be fine, getting "cleaned up" as it were, but found I had a total melt down during the shave. Cried my eyes out. In retrospect, I think those tears were an accumulation of all the fear and stress I'd been under since failing ill. Turns out, I have a very nice shaped head and look good bald! I wear a beanie around my kids because my youngest is afraid to see me hairless. I really hate covering my head, but I get why she doesn't want to see my new look. I do wear a beanie at night to sleep,  just feels better on the pillow case. As for your beautiful legs... be vain! I think pride in our bodies helps us heal. 

TeddyandBears_Mom's picture
TeddyandBears_Mom
Posts: 1577
Joined: Jun 2015

Welcome to the club that no one wants to belong to! However, without the need... I would have never met so many wonderful women.

Sorry we missed your first post and I'm glad you tried again.

You will gain a lot of knowledge and support here.

Stay strong and don't hesitate to reach out for anything and everything!

Love and Hugs,

Cindi

Kvdyson's picture
Kvdyson
Posts: 789
Joined: Jan 2016

Hi Soup, I haven't experienced lymphedema (yet) myself but I understand that wearing pressure compression stockings helps. Good luck to you and let us know how you are doing.

TartanToes's picture
TartanToes
Posts: 5
Joined: Feb 2016

Hi Soup and everyone!

I was diagnosed with Stage IIIC endometrial cancer in the fall of 2013. I had a total hysterectomy and 19 pelvic lymph nodes removed. I was fortunate enough that I chose to join a lymphodema study that my oncologist is part of, so I had regular monitoring. I think what also may have helped was that I tried to be as active as my body would let me be while I was undergoing 6 months of treatment. I was able to continue to work during my treatment, although it was part-time. I have an office on the second floor, so I think doing the stairs helped, too. My worry during my treatment was neuropathy. I did a glutamine regime that was recommended by my medical oncologist that helped. I did develop some neuropathy in my toes, but it is very mild. The sisters here have some very good advice. So, I'd say that you're in pretty good hands.

Lou Ann M's picture
Lou Ann M
Posts: 996
Joined: Feb 2015

You have joined a group of tough ladies.  I am glad you are here but sad that you had to come.  this is a great place for information, information and encouragement.  Hair doesn't mean much to me anymore. I have lost it 4 times now.  I do not like wigs at all, but there are some beautiful ones out there that look like natural hair.  For, me it is such a pick me up to go shopping and come home with a new hat.  My husband says he love me bald, says it makes me look sexy I thank him, but I think he must be blind.  

Hugs and prayer, Lou Ann

EZLiving66's picture
EZLiving66
Posts: 1370
Joined: Oct 2015

Welcome to the club nobody wants to be a member of!!  I'm sorry we didn't see you before!!!  I'm 63 and have Stage II UPSC and had a total hysterectomy on September 30th.  Port was installed on October 26th with first chemo on October 27th.  My port site never healed and after two rounds of antibiotics, I had it removed on December 22nd.  I'm still going to wound care to try and get the port site healed.  I made it through three chemos before I had to quit because of severe side effects.  My oncologist couldn't find any other tumors so I was having the chemo as a preventative in case stray cancer cells were still floating around in my body.

I have the opposite of you - my blood doesn't clot like it should so I have to be careful of the medications I take - nothing that will thin my blood any further than it is.  Did you have a total hysterectomy before radiation?

Love, 

Eldri

molimoli
Posts: 514
Joined: Aug 2014

With this group of ladies, seasoned or new ones ,I guarantee in no time you  will know more about lady Cancer than your doctor knows.The raw experiences are shared with no sugar coating so learn to take deep breaths and say hmmm ! often. We will be with you in spirit (not the ghosty kind) up the hills and down in the valleys, None of us can wrap our heads around this sneeky alligator but we hope some new smart treatment will help us to leave the water's edge and this alligator behind us.One day at a time my sister, that's how you wrap it,one day at a time.

Welcome to all the newbies here.

You are now one of us and we are hugging

Nuff love ,Moli, whispering hope and hugging .

Northwoodsgirl
Posts: 570
Joined: Oct 2009

I am NED since my last chemo Dec. 2010. I am very sorry to hear of you reoccurance! The emotional roller coaster is so hard to deal with. This discussion board is a sisterhood for us all even when we have survived years after our initial treatments. Something that helped me was listening to Bellaruth Naperstak's CDs of guided imagery. They are available to download on iTunes and also through Amazon. I still listen to them. ((Hug))

I will keep you in my prayers! Please keep posting! 

Subscribe to Comments for "Journey beginning - emotional today. "