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Editgrl's picture
Editgrl
Posts: 903
Joined: Jun 2015

This is kind of a weird question/topic but...  as a single woman, divorced for many years, I have always been very independent and self-sufficient.  As I continue my cancer journey, it has become apparent that I cannot do everything on my own anymore and I do need to ask for help.  I have a great network of friends and family who are willing to help, but I still hesitate to ask. If someone offers something specific, i.e., can I bring you dinner?  it is easy for me to accept and say yes.  It is much harder for me to call someone who has offered to run errands even though I know I can.   Anybody else have this issue and if so, how did you get over it? 

NoTimeForCancer's picture
NoTimeForCancer
Posts: 2416
Joined: Mar 2013

I'm single too.  I am very independent and my friends know it.  I will tell you this: allowing your friends to do for you is the GIFT you give them.  

They really care about you and want to do things for you.  I will also tell you many will SAY they will do anything, and when you ask them, you will see they didn't mean it.  That's ok.  I accept that people do have their limits.  I also treasure the ones who KEPT ON COMING.  

THOSE are the amazing people in your life.  So while you think you need something, you really are GIVING to those people as well.

pam0422's picture
pam0422
Posts: 25
Joined: Aug 2015

I have been in several situations where the person who is going through the illness has someone step in and spread the word and schedule help for them. Like a best friend or favorite cousin who could spread the word and be the go to person to for people to contact to see what they can do to help you. On some days it is too hard to even answer the phone or door and be pleasant, let alone pick up the phone to ask for help. I have a minister friend with a brain tumor who had an entire church wanting to help, but that involved being ready and willing to have guests dropping in all day every day. The problem was solved by having one person coordinate the help and putting a cooler on their front porch where food, pkgs etc could be left. Do you have someone who could start an email or communication thread for you, using your contact list to let people check in and help out? Facebook is fantastic for that too if you are a facebookie.

Editgrl's picture
Editgrl
Posts: 903
Joined: Jun 2015

I have an email contact list with everyone who has offered to help through which I have been giving updates on my progress and treatment.  It's easy to manage one email to all. In the last day, since I posted, things may have started to take on a life of their own as I am now getting offers of food to be dropped off.  Early on, before surgery when people wanted to know what they could do to help, I told them that I thought I would need more help during chemo because of the fatigue and side effects.  Friends are remembering that now.  The cooler on the porch is a great idea; I have a friend who often drops by and just leaves things because she doesn't want to ring if I might be sleeping.

NoTimeForCancer, I do understand that allowing friends to help is a gift.  I know how helpless they feel and giving them something to do allows them to feel a little less helpless.  It's just a new experience for me, and a lesson that I am now learning.  Too bad that cancer had to be the teacher.

 

molimoli
Posts: 514
Joined: Aug 2014

Editgrl your post and the responses caused me some sadness as I realize that locking my family and friends out of this  cancer drama that keeps me in rehearsal all by myself, robs me and  is also robbing them .

There are friends and family that I see  or speak with everyday, There is no physical changes on me for them to see so they haven't a clue.They are very happy that my grieving is minimized , because now I do a lot more than I did since my daughter's death. They are happy that I " found myself again".They dont know that I am catching up on living in my effort to outfox dying.

I don't know how I will explain myself ,especially having surgery under everyone's noses without their imput and suggestions. Wow ! daunting task ahead explaining why I decided on going on a vacation with no one else.AAH!!!      I have lied everytime some one ask where I was all day (Cancer Centre of course) I  usually find an answer depending on who is asking.  For now I am stuck on lying and lying is stuck on me.

All I know for sure is that I am hoping that this kind of lying is not an unforgivable sin or Moli's goose will be cooked. Oh Lord, I suddenly feel heat.hope Satan dislikes me and eject me from his place. That's my hope for my lying self today.

My hope for you all today is uplifted spirit and courage to continue on your quest to make your selves well. I am hugging. Nuff love.

 

TeddyandBears_Mom's picture
TeddyandBears_Mom
Posts: 1414
Joined: Jun 2015

Moli,

You are way too hard on yourself. Nothing you are doing needs forgiveness.

I do think though, that you might be realizing that it is time to pull others in? This truly is not a journey to take alone.

I wish you could recognize the wonderful spirit that you are and what you bring to others. Sharing yourself may be just what you need.

Take care of yourself my friend Moli. Be as kind to You as you have been to others on this board.

We will support you in your decisions.

Love,

Cindi

molimoli
Posts: 514
Joined: Aug 2014

 and the pitying looks even though  in my head my glass is half full,will they see it so, I wonder,If not I am gonna have to grin and bare the inquisition. (eyes rolling at the thought)

  Whatever kindness I give it's only a fraction of what I have received from the members here, you guys never fail to talk me out of a stumble.

I will my friend I will ,Thanks for the support,really glad you found us, I wish you  success and comfort.Your strong positive attitude will serve you well, you'll see.

 Moli, nuff love Cindi.

txtrisha55's picture
txtrisha55
Posts: 676
Joined: Apr 2011

When I was told I had cancer I was at work and it was April 1st 2011.  I shut the door to my office and looked on line to read about the cancer the dr told me I had.  MMMT or  carcinoma sarcoma.  What I read set me off crying. What was I going to do. I had a 50% chance of living more that 5 years depending on what stage it was. Stage could not be determined until after surgery. I called my sister, whom I share a house with and told her. I lied to my daughter who worked in the same company but different area. I sat down with both of them after my grandson had been put down for the night and told my daughter the truth.  To say that she was pissed off is an understatement. That was just after 12 hours of lying.  It is your choice and I wish you all the luck in the world and will pray for you to have the strength you need to go through this alone.  I cannot think of going through the journey without a backup. My daughter stayed with me at the hospital for a week except for one night when my best friend of 40 years stayed. My sister held my power of attorney. Both still go to my follow up appointments with my gyn onc dr. My daughter and best friend went to my chemo infusion treatment days. We watched tv, movies, played card games and laughed a lot. A burden shared is half the load. Chemo (carbo/taxol) for me was a breeze. I had 6 rounds every 21 days. Yes I lost all my hair, I did get tied, my taste buds changed and I had aches and pains on days 5-7 but I survived. My hair grew back, taste came back but to this day four years later I still cannot eat peanut butter.  Which ever way you go alone or with family/friends, the ladies on this board will be here for you. This is the place to come, cry, vent, yell, ask questions or get a cyber hug (hug)!! :-)Best wishes for you and all the women fighting this battle. Trish

molimoli
Posts: 514
Joined: Aug 2014

Hi Trish ,I appreciate  your super positive and upbeat  take on the whole cancer journey. A special thanks for the comforting assurance that I'll have you all in my corner ,win or lose. I am indeed blessed.I can feel the hug and I embraced in return.

Yes we will fight on in many different ways but fight none the less.. Plenty love and good wishes coming back at you, Moli.

Sandy3185's picture
Sandy3185
Posts: 228
Joined: Oct 2013

Moli, I've been in your shoes and I know your heart is in the right place. I too tried to protect my daughters from what was happening. I didn't tell them that I was sick at first and when I finally told them I still didn't tell them about UPSC just said it was endometrial cancer. That frightened them enuf! They did find out everything when they spoke to my gyn/onc after my 7 hour surgery. I'm still glad that I didn't tell them the whole truth from the beginning but I was so thankful for their care and concern during my recovery and treatment.

My husband was aware from the beginning and was my rock. But it really took a toll on him. His fear and grieving pushed me to do my best to recover quickly. I really had a hard time with chemo and I was ill most of the time, so I know I couldn't have hidden everything from my family( and especially the surgery and the 6 days in the hospital!), but I often wish I could have. That being said, I would still suggest that you seriously consider letting your children know what's going on. Sure they'll be frightened but they will also want to be there for you and, I think, grateful that they COULD be there for you. They will understand why you hesitated to inform them but also relieved that you allowed them to help you. This deception is also taking a toll on you just when you need to be at your strongest. 

Whatever you decide, I know you will be doing what feels right to you and for your family,

Sandy

molimoli
Posts: 514
Joined: Aug 2014

Well said and well taken Sandy,I  intend to tell I really do, I don't yet know how the interupted lives will move forward  yet another time, Oh me ,oh my.

I will work on it,I promise.  Yes the deception is draining mentally.Thank God I have the knack of shutting things off  sometimes.One problem is that my kids rushes to the internet for everything ,There is  nothing good or hopeful  about upsc on the internet,nothing at all. , Yes Sandy it must feel right , it will come. My youngest will be going to live in her dream city,New York  in a month ,so I will allow her to settle in first  , for a while, and I dare not tell the chatterbox daughter of mine who has no concept of the word secret,lol.Some mothers do have em.

How was chemo hard for you ? ,I shouldn't ask but I must, and you mustn't  sugar coat it , ok ? 

Love you all with your caring selves, I am hugging.

It happened to Me's picture
It happened to Me
Posts: 203
Joined: Apr 2014

I am just like you.  Single, and independent.  When I received the news I had cancer, I told my family and asked my aunt to attend all appointments with my mom and me.  Then, I told the people closest to me who I wanted to tell myself.  Then, it was announced at church as a prayer request.

I had a friend who was single, independent and had breast cancer and didn't want to talk about it at all.  She went through her treatments and people offered her help and sometimes she took it.  I had decided that I needed to be open and talk about it because people around her didn't know what to say to her.  I didn't want that.  I wanted to be an educator and I was very upbeat.  When people saw how upbeat I was and even made fun of "being spayed", it broke the ice with alot of them and people were more at ease.  People felt sorry for me but I would turn it into a positive and found a reason to be thankful.  Through my whole cancer journey, I found things to laugh about and be thankful for.  People volunteered to help in all sorts of ways.  The first time I had to ask for help was agonizing for me, but it got easier.  People had to mow my lawn and shovel my snow and rake my leaves.  They enjoyed helping, just like I enjoy helping others.

All that to say, it is a blessing that goes both ways.  Trying to do it alone doesn't work.  As my brother-in-law says, "It takes a team"  I used Caring Bridge and facebook to let my family and friends know what I needed.  My mom and dad took care of me most of the time, so there was little except for the yard work that needed.  I did have friends take me for rides to get me out of the house.

Everyone has to find their own way.  If you have been lying, better come clean because each lie needs another lie and another one etc. and pretty soon you get caught and you're in a whole lot more deep water.  If people show you pity, give them a reason to change their mind.   I think people react to news like this the way the person who has cancer reacts.  That's what I've experienced with my friend and I.  Totally different ways we handled it and totally different ways people reacted.

Ask for help.  Give someone a blessing.

Jeanette

molimoli
Posts: 514
Joined: Aug 2014

Hi Jeanette, Thanks for your post, I will be giving your advice a lot of thought as I go through the decision phase,that's when I allow myself to ponder cancer and it's trappings again.

I have always made sure that my lies are not gigantic ones that will bite me we all know where,lol

My conversations  are like this:  "I called you this morning,where were you" ?

                                               ' Down Town'

                                                " Doing ?

                                                 " stuff'''     (Of course the stuff is usually scans, or blood work,and the hospital is down town.  ( that's stuff right? )

                                                 " Ok wanna go out to eat later "

I see it more like none disclosure or teeny weeny lies if you look at it with technical scrutiny. (That statement is  me pleading not guilty,and asking for a pass.I am totally shameless.)

Thanks for keeping me in your thoughts and prayers, all of you keeps be sane, kind-of-sane   ( kinda sane)

Nuff nuff love, Moli.

                                               

                                                

ConnieSW's picture
ConnieSW
Posts: 1335
Joined: Jun 2012

I usually try to keep my strong opinions to myself on this board because it's not possible to understand all the details in the poster's life that go into making a decision but i can no longer help myself.  Do with my 2 cents as you will, but please consider how you would feel if one of your daughters kept a health issue of this magnitude from you.

i waited till I had the biopsy results till I told my daughter.  I didn't see any need to worry her till I knew what there was to worry about.  I had to tell her on the phone as she lives some distance from me.  Despite that, she has been there for me in every way.  I think your daughter can do the same for you, even after she moves to NYC.

 

i mean well, Connie

molimoli
Posts: 514
Joined: Aug 2014

I appreciate all of your comments I feel the caring upon every word,and together you had many words.Every one had a valid point. Except circumstances sometimes dictates actions and outcomes. I embrace you all with thankfulness for taking the load off of my children by being there for me through this maze, my cup is half full because I might not have found you my sisters, what a wonderful blessing the creator carved out for me/ us.Thank you CSN, Thank you Linda (wherever you are resting )Thank you Debrajo. My children will be grateful that somebody was actually there for me through my ups and downs. They will be fine with my decision.

I have taken everything in consideration in the last 2 days, uninterrupted decision making sessions with my inner self .I have reached  final resolutions.

1]  My second opinion surgeon after reviewing all my scans thinks that surgery is dangerous  and doable ( cancer itself is dangerous, so) I picked Doable .He will engage other surgeons and come up with the safest surgery plan possible as tumor is resting on intestine  but has not penitrated.Which makes it a little more difficult to prevent damage to the colon. but a blessing it stands on its own for now. It was left too long, should have been operated on  3 cm ago. I told him the delay was not of my doing .He understands fully, surgery will never be embraced by an oncologist ,That's not what the Cancer hospitals hires them to do , That's no news to me ,but now that's spilt milk ,I move on.

2] I had already stopped by the Chemo Centre to cancel the Chemo session that was booked for me starting tomorrow Sept 8th. For that, another time,another place,maybe.

3] My children and grand children : We already share a lot of love ,hugs and Kisses  without punctuating it with sneaky worry.My kids  do not have any CURE  to offer me and I already know that  I am loved so I cannot find a justifyable reason to do the  whack-a-mole on them.They are all I have ,I  need them to be continually happy for as long as I live.

I am happy that they have begun to live again.really,really happy,We have all died before.I for one stayed dead too long.I held them back. Never again if that's in my control will I allow anything to diminish their enjoyment of the present time. Therefore,I have decided that I will not arrest their lives with this news of terminal Cancer at this time or anytime before it's absolutely necessary, neither will I arrest my enjoyment of the rest of my life with the knowledge of it.

I Have embarked on seeking out alternative attacks on mets ,especially before they appear ,It will be mostly nutritional and herbal.with necessary surgery.  Thats my resolve .

I will post my journey just in case I am happy with the outcome and if the outcome causes sorrow instead, you will all know never to take advice from me, so it's a win win,  lol and hug yourselves , we have lived, outlived many, be grateful.  My cup is half full inspite of cancer. I will always see it that way.

I leave later this week for a vacation, Don't  know when I'll return ,don't care when, I'll see.  I will keep in touch until I leave and after that I will be in touch whenever I find internet.

I didn't know it was ever possible to feel so close to  a group of people whom I  have never met, wonders never cease to happen in life, glad it happened to me.

Nuff nuff love. Moli  

Love the people the Creator gave you because he will need them back one day.

 

 

TeddyandBears_Mom's picture
TeddyandBears_Mom
Posts: 1414
Joined: Jun 2015

Moli, I'm so glad you found a surgeon you trust to help you! I know this is the direction you wanted to go from the beginning. I pray that they are able to remove all of it and you never, ever hear the word METS again! I hope they can get you in asap so that your tumors don't have time to grow. Did they give you any kind of idea of timeline?

Enjoy your vacation. You have a plan. So, this can be a time of relaxing and getting yourself ready for surgery.

Posting your journey will be a gift to all that come to the board. The more we all share, the stronger we become in our knowledge to make decisions.

Take care Moli,

Cindi

molimoli
Posts: 514
Joined: Aug 2014

The surgeon will be consulting with 2 other surgeons  using my record and scans. I expect to be in surgery in October, I have already told him that as of Sept 8th I am on a Cancer Time out until Oct 1st. I will call his office to notify of my return and take it from there.I will keep you all posted.  Removing all of it may not be an option,realistically, but I will settle for debulking.,

Mets, my dear Cindi will be part of the programme that is my life.  My 7+cm tumors must have created many seedlings .keeping them non- aggressive, few and far between will be the  most daunting challenge moving forward. Killing them off as they pop up will be the best case senario, but with what?  I will tirelessly work to find an answer , no other choice but to seek. For what it's worth I will periodically document my Journey here if only for knowledge to make decisions as you have stated. I have gone out on an unknown limb so no one should climb this tree based on my actions less you should find it completely lunatic and then what?

Stay strong.  Moli, Plenty love.

AWK
Posts: 364
Joined: Mar 2013

Moli, as I have said all along it is our individual journeys and decisions to be made are ours alone.  We may not agree but we have to respect each other's choices.  I sense peace in your post in so many ways and am happy for you.  As a friend, my job is to be supportive and wish you the very best which I do.  Enjoy your trip! Take deep and powerful breaths, feel the sand on you feet and enjoy the sound of the waves on the beach.  These are all my zen things that I do, either in person or in my head, to relax.  

Sending many hugs and keeping you in my prayers as well as your family.  Looking forward to hearing about your amazing trip!

as Ro would say - in peace and caring -Anne

molimoli
Posts: 514
Joined: Aug 2014

Anne, Thank you for what you are doing with your body for all of us,such an unselfish brave act. We appreciate you and pray that you get the handle on this Cancer soon,I pray for inspiration for the doctors .love you lots.  Thanks for understanding me .

Well Zen and I are going to the beach,over and over and over . moli,

Editgrl's picture
Editgrl
Posts: 903
Joined: Jun 2015

Moli, I am happy that you have come to a decision and are at peace with that.  That's really the only thing that matters.  Enjoy your vacation, however long it stretches.  It sounds deliciously decadent. We will be here for you when you return.

Chris

molimoli
Posts: 514
Joined: Aug 2014

I will be somewhere else but I will be with all of you all the while. Good luck with your treatment and may your discomfort be teeny-weeny. Showers of blessings.

Moli. Nuff love

debrajo's picture
debrajo
Posts: 1095
Joined: Sep 2011

Dear Molimoli,  I am very glad if I have helped!  I am more than glad you have come to a decission that has lifted a weight from your shoulders and given you some measure of Peace!  That, indeed, is a Blessing.  We all, in the end, must make our own choises, right or wrong.  With a plan in place comes a sence of ease and confort.  Reguardless, we stand behind you 100%!  I know some of the others won't agree with me, but I think you made the right choise not to tell the children at this time.  I did and I regret it to this day for various reasons.  One son put his entire life on hold "just in case" something happened to me.  He turned 30 a few days ago and has just now gotten engaged.  There will come a time to let everyone know whatever the out come is.  You know your family dynamics better than anyone.  Yes, they may be upset or mad, but their lives will be "normal" for a while as ours will never be again.  Please let us know how you are.  We care...so much!  Best, Debra(Jo)

molimoli
Posts: 514
Joined: Aug 2014

 OOOOOOHHH !!  debrajo, debrajo,debrajo !  (SCREAMING OUT LOUD) how did you know that I needed to hear that.more than anything I needed some one to agree that arrested lives over such a long period 'just in case' is never a good thing for young people. We could be fighting this thing for years ,what a tedious journey for young people to accompany us on, My daughters are 27,and 33. They havent lived yet, at that age I was the life of the party,in fact I was the party. Everything joyous for my entire family happened at my home. My immediate and extended family was my life. .I lived with my three girls as a young divorced mother, we did as we pleased ,traveled whenever, some times on a whim.We had nothing or no one holding us back,  I don't want to hold them back,  I need them to spread their wings, I don't want them on guard ,I need them to be free of encumbrances, and embrace life  until I am absolutely sure it's over my one head,until then they'll be helpless unlookers with teary eyes and broken spirits .Not a good thing, I think, too young for the burden.

They just went through hell and back , I stayed in hell ,they never got the same mother back, Cancer brought me back to life and reality,I'll be damned if I am going to allow Cancer  to stop them in their tracks.Today  they both just came back from USA after having the time of their lives at a wedding there,Wouldn't they feel guilty to laugh out loud and live large if they knew their mother is alone with terminal cancer as they party ? Wouldn't family members and friends be judgemental of them  as they live their lives as young people are suppose to?  Life is short,uncertain and fleeting  they deserve to enjoy it while they can,

In my own way I will get them prepared for dealing with death and grief in an acceptable non life changing way, any death, before they know it I will have them all including gran.seeing death as part of the plan from the day of birth . because it is. The acceptance that death is possible frees us to live our dreams quickly.

debrajo , your post made me cry then took me from a 95% comfort level to a 100% comfort level with no expected regrets. Thanks for the boost.but I think we are now a team of 2, but it will pass, we will win them all back to the fold because they can't do without you and I can't do without them , lol.

Congratulations to your son, I wish him, his partner and you much happiness. He'll catch up,don't worry, you can't untell him now,let thoughts of the regrets be fleeting.

 Don't forget to brag to us about the wedding.we love weddings and their stories.

My sister,if you don't know I'll tell you now ,and if you know this is a reminder. You have created a life line for us and we love and thank you.I'll be in touch. Plenty love Moli.

debrajo's picture
debrajo
Posts: 1095
Joined: Sep 2011

I feel so much better that you are at 100% now!  I second-gussed my post...some people call me too negitive.  I prefer to be realistic and then if the outcome is good, well, I'm pleasently surprised!   My parents always helt we children back from life out of fear for us.  Can't tell you how many times I have bit my tongue not to do the same with my five!  I do live through my kids, mostly long distance, but they have wonderful lives!  The oldest, 43, lives in Saudi Arabia and goes on wonderful vacations in places like Crete and Santorinie, sending back wonderful pictures. My next is 37,in the Marines and is in California now.  Sends me pictures of the Giant Sequioas and the mountains.  My only daughter is a NICU R.N. living in Virginia and sends me pictures of the D.C. cherry blossems and Colonial Williamsburg.  My baby boy is 21 and in college here in Texas.  I see pictures of the historical town and his faternity tailgates.  My son that stayed behind lives about 35 miles away and I get to help plan his wedding, God Willing, Oct. 29.....2016!  THERE WILL BE PICTURES!  LOL!.  My point and I believe yours, we have lived, we want more, but they have a lifetime of Living and I would not tell a single one of them til I absolutely HAD to!  I would love to have grandchildren from the youngest two, but I have nine now from the older ones.  If God calls me home, I may not really want to go, but if He gives me a heads up, THEN I'll let them know!!  Have so much fun you can't stand it,eat what you want no matter if you should, look at the stars all night, and say a prayer for all of us!  Much, Much, Nuff Love!  Debra(Jo)

txtrisha55's picture
txtrisha55
Posts: 676
Joined: Apr 2011

I wish you wellness and pray for the drs to remove it all without incident.  Enjoy you vacation. Rest and relax and come back at peace.  When you do decide to talk with family we will be here for you until then we all remain your support system. Trish

molimoli
Posts: 514
Joined: Aug 2014

There is never a doubt that all of you sisters here means well. I appreciate all response . There is so much more to it Connie  as you said  unless all the details are known  a clear picture can't be painted.

 Details of our lives and the prolonged pain we suffered were posted in my first sets of postings started in August of 2014.if you had the chance to read them ,maybe you will see why bad news needs to stay away from my children for a very long time. I don't  agree  with you but  but love that you care enough to respond.

In any case  'worry' is the word that I so hate to cause, No time for it  in my head or theirs but I fully understand your concern.. I have replied to everyone in a few postings yesterday and tonight ,you will get why and how I arrived at my decisions. at least I am hoping you will see things from another angle. They are lenghty postings but  I needed to purge myself of all confusion and make resolved decisions. 

Thank you for caring, blessings in abundance ,my wish for you today.  Nuff love, moli

Editgrl's picture
Editgrl
Posts: 903
Joined: Jun 2015

whose mom had endometrial cancer...  I am so so glad that she told me what was going on.  Yes, it was scary, yes, it had an immediate impact on my life, and yes, I changed some plans, but I would not give back that time for anything.  Fighting that battle together brought us closer in ways I could not have imagined.  The love between us gained a dimension that I cannot even describe.  Pity?  There was no pity.  There was only a determination from everyone in my family to be there for her in whatever way we could.  And I know that that kind of support lifted her up even in her darkest days.

I know you will do what is right for you, Moli, but I encourage you to allow you and your family and friends to experience that kind of love and support.  

Chris

ConnieSW's picture
ConnieSW
Posts: 1335
Joined: Jun 2012

Good to hear from you.  I missed you.

It happened to Me's picture
It happened to Me
Posts: 203
Joined: Apr 2014

Thanks, it's nice to finally be back.  I have had computer trouble since June and took a trip to Mexico to see my first new Great Nephew.  Then came back sick.  Nothing major.  Am just now getting  back to this board and catching up on the posts.

Jeanette

TeddyandBears_Mom's picture
TeddyandBears_Mom
Posts: 1414
Joined: Jun 2015

Jeanette,

Great post! I am finding the exact reactions that you did. At first, people don't know what to say or do and kind of look at you with pity. But, I keep a smile on my face and assure them that I am doing fine and will come out of this on the other side living life to the fullest. It gives them permission to be the same around me as they always have been. I am normally a positive person and find it easier to be happy than dwell on the sad or scary. I fully plan to celebrate my 85th birthday. After that, the rest will be bonus. :-) (I'm 58 now)

Cindi

It happened to Me's picture
It happened to Me
Posts: 203
Joined: Apr 2014

I respect the decision you have made.  The most satisfying part of the post was the calmness and the peacefulness that you have come to a decision.  Like someone (I think you) have said, none of us knows all the circumstances each of us are encountering.  I am happy you are taking a vacation and pray that it will be so refreshing as you endeavor this next step in your journey. 

I, too, have found solace in this group and feel close to each one as we share our hearts. 

We, as "peachies" can talk to each other, share our stories and thoughts, and the person receiving them can ponder them and maybe it will help them decide and maybe it won't.  If it doesn't, then that's ok.    What I have found refreshing is that no one takes offense with us sharing our hearts and our stories.

I will be looking forward to reading your posts as you continue this journey.

Take care and know you are being cared for.

Jeanette

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