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"Blue" Day Today

wolfen's picture
Posts: 1313
Joined: Apr 2009

Hello All,

I am still here in the shadows watching over each of you.

Today was a rather "blue" day for me as I recalled what I was doing on this day last year. Tomorrow at 9:17 AM, it will be one year since my wonderful Ron left on his final journey. I have to believe he reached his destination. This last year has probably been the hardest one of my entire life. Grief has no time limit. You don't "get over it". Perhaps the pain lessens and the tears don't come as frequently, but they are always hiding near the surface. The lonliness never ends.

My daughter called tonight just to see if I was okay. She too has had a bad week. She is a month out of her last surgery, her 7th, which left her with a colostomy. Of course not what she wanted, but doable just the same. She has opted for no more chemo, something she has been considering for a while. She simply wants to heal from this surgery and enjoy whatever time she is allowed to have remaining.

PLease know that I am nearby if anyone just needs a shoulder.



wmc's picture
Posts: 1795
Joined: Jan 2014

Time does not heal all wonds. It makes the pain seem less in time but it is still there. I lost my Father to cancer back in 1984 and every year around his birthday it get's to me a little. Also, now that I had cancer as well, some things I do trigger the memories. Now it is not sad as it once was, but I still do miss him, and think of him. The great memories are I got six years more than we were suposed to haveand I thank the Lord for them.

Sorry you daughter is going through this as well. Some times it helps me just to write it down and share or vent. This is a very good place to do that.  Please know thoughts and prayers are with you. Be well.

Oh, and thanks for watching over us all, that is so kind of you.


Posts: 702
Joined: Mar 2014

Wolfen, thinking of you and yours. G.

Hondo's picture
Posts: 6643
Joined: Apr 2009

Hi Wolfen

The wounds may heal in time but the memories of our love ones don’t. My Sister-in-law still has a hard time even thou my brother passed away 14 years ago; she talks as if it was yesterday. I still remember my mother and the things she would say and how much I miss her; she had been gone now for 20 years. The pain is a little easier to deal with now but the lost is always there, I know by faith that I will see her again and to me that is a comforting to know that one days we will all be together again.

God bless and give you the strength you need one day at a time and thank you for continuing to be here for all of us.

PS: Still praying for your daughter everyday


Tim Hondo    

phrannie51's picture
Posts: 4673
Joined: Mar 2012

Anniversary dates and holidays are tough times.  It's true, time doesn't heal all wounds....most but not every single one.....losing a spouse or a child are wounds that hang in forever.  I know my mom never got over losing my dad....she got past it, but not over it if that makes sense....

JBG's decision for no more chemo was a big one, and tough on you as well....will be keeping her....and you.....in my prayers.


Posts: 220
Joined: Apr 2014

Wolfen, my thoughts are with you <3 stay strong

debbiejeanne's picture
Posts: 3095
Joined: Jan 2010

dear wolfen, i cannot believe it has already been a year!  although that seems like a long time, it isn't when you're talking about healing.  the pain will get easier but it will take more time.  allow yourself the bad days/anniversaries and let your friends/family help you thru.  you still have a lot on your plate with jbg being so sick.  i'm sorry about the chemo but jbg knows what is best for her.  you and your family are ALWAYS in my thoughts and prayers!  please call me if you ever want to talk/cry/yell, whatever!  sending you a real big cyber hug ((((((((  0  ))))))))))))).  i hope you can feel the love behind it.

God bless you and your family, Wolfen.

love, hugs and prayers,


debbiejeanne's picture
Posts: 3095
Joined: Jan 2010

for you wolfen.

VivianLee5689's picture
Posts: 546
Joined: Aug 2012

I read this and it broke my heart.  I remember when this happened and I had a hard time reaching out as I had just lost my husband.  I have thought about you often and glad to know that you hang around the site.  I have missed you.


hwt's picture
Posts: 2330
Joined: Jun 2012

Thoughts and prayers for brighter tomorrows.

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