Dad in hospital..

Options
seg2426
seg2426 Member Posts: 5
in Esophageal Cancer #1
I deleted some posts I had made a cpl weeks ago from here because William something or other freaked me out big time. I didn't like the info he gave but more so the way it was delivered, nor did I appreciate the personal questions so I was leary and deleted the posts.

That being said, I'd like some general feedback (w/out his if possible).

My dad was admitted last night for emergency transfusion of 3 units of blood a fourth may be transfused, not sure yet. He's not doing well at all. The most ironic thing is he was feeling really good last week and was even able to eat quite normally.. Then boom, this.

His H&H at the hospital yesterday were 6.9 and 23.7. The week before he was 8.2 and 27.3. There is no obvious signs of bleeding, meaning it's not coming out in his stool, urine, or sputum. Where is it going?!? Or is it just not being made?

I left him last night because he told me he was ok. I called the nurse this morning and she said he's having a rough morning with vomiting, and still very weak and short of breath. I am so torn right now as if I should go to the hospital or not. I am supposed to be attending a NFL playoff game today and Dad wants me to go, yet I'm not sure if I should if "this" is the time.

I'm so torn.

Please, William... you may mean well, but your posts frighten and intimidate me so please refrain from answering. Thank you.

Comments

  • sangora
    sangora Member Posts: 213
    #2
    Options
    This is rough
    Is your dad still getting chemo? If so, it is not unusual for the chemo drugs to depress red cell production and also destroy new cells before they are mature. I have had that issue with Cisplatin. Sam
  • seg2426
    seg2426 Member Posts: 5
    #3
    Options
    sangora said:

    This is rough
    Is your dad still getting chemo? If so, it is not unusual for the chemo drugs to depress red cell production and also destroy new cells before they are mature. I have had that issue with Cisplatin. Sam

    NO treatment
    I should have summarized his backstory first.

    No chemo, he chose no treatment when prognosis was given of 6-9 months w/out and then 9-12 with. He felt it was too much effort for little return and feared quality of life would be worse with chemo. He was diagnosed Aug 2011 stage IV, mets to liver, lymph nodes and some spots on lungs that were not confirmed as cancer but were labeled as 'probable' cancer.
  • Daisylin
    Daisylin Member Posts: 365
    #4
    Options
    sangora said:

    This is rough
    Is your dad still getting chemo? If so, it is not unusual for the chemo drugs to depress red cell production and also destroy new cells before they are mature. I have had that issue with Cisplatin. Sam

    Sorry
    I can't offer much help to you on the matter, but just wanted to let you know that I'm thinking of you and your dad. I hope he pulls through. As Sam said, it is not unusual to have low blood counts during chemo.

    As far as the decision to spend time with your dad or go to the football game...... I guess that's up to you. Unfortunately we never know what tomorrow, or even today will bring, so ultimately the choice of how you live life in the meantime is up to you. Personally, I would spend the time with dad, if his situation seems that dire. There will definitely be more NFL games in the future, guaranteed...... But days with loved ones are not guaranteed, ever. Just my opinion of course, and not being a sports fan made 'my' decision very easy :)

    Again, hope dad pulls through.....
    be well,
    Chantal
    wife of Lee, ivb
    passed away Nov 8, 2011
  • seg2426
    seg2426 Member Posts: 5
    #5
    Options
    Daisylin said:

    Sorry
    I can't offer much help to you on the matter, but just wanted to let you know that I'm thinking of you and your dad. I hope he pulls through. As Sam said, it is not unusual to have low blood counts during chemo.

    As far as the decision to spend time with your dad or go to the football game...... I guess that's up to you. Unfortunately we never know what tomorrow, or even today will bring, so ultimately the choice of how you live life in the meantime is up to you. Personally, I would spend the time with dad, if his situation seems that dire. There will definitely be more NFL games in the future, guaranteed...... But days with loved ones are not guaranteed, ever. Just my opinion of course, and not being a sports fan made 'my' decision very easy :)

    Again, hope dad pulls through.....
    be well,
    Chantal
    wife of Lee, ivb
    passed away Nov 8, 2011

    Chantal, I know it seems an
    Chantal, I know it seems an easy decision. Dad v Game.

    But Dad is a HUGE sports fan as am I and he is excited (vicariously) for me to go. If I don't go, he'll feel responsible. His nurse at the hospital is telling me to go, she said she'll call me asap if anything changes and I can call her periodically as the day goes on.

    It just sucks. I don't know what to do, what to expect. I guess it seems silly.. He felt so good last week.
  • Daisylin
    Daisylin Member Posts: 365
    #6
    Options
    seg2426 said:

    Chantal, I know it seems an
    Chantal, I know it seems an easy decision. Dad v Game.

    But Dad is a HUGE sports fan as am I and he is excited (vicariously) for me to go. If I don't go, he'll feel responsible. His nurse at the hospital is telling me to go, she said she'll call me asap if anything changes and I can call her periodically as the day goes on.

    It just sucks. I don't know what to do, what to expect. I guess it seems silly.. He felt so good last week.

    not an easy decision....
    First of all, it is not silly..... I remember many times when my husband was sick, and someone would invite me out for dinner, shopping, movies, whatever...... I know your turmoil, all of us caregivers here do!!! I always just wanted to stay home, and be with Lee, and he always encouraged me to go out and have some fun. Usually I would go, and miss him like crazy the whole time, and could not wait to get home!! However, he always wanted to hear the latest 'gossip' and how my friends were doing. He would usually take the time to have his own friends come for a visit, or he'd nap. He hated seeing me so sad all the time, and he was so happy if I could get out and have some fun for a change. He always felt so guilty that my life suffered so much, "because of him". I don't begrudge him any of it, of course, but I know what he meant. Guilt is always a mucky road, because one of us would feel guilty, whatever I chose to do. If I went out, I felt bad, If I didn't go out, he felt bad.

    Unfortunately, there are usually some bumps along the way with ec, and hopefully this is just one of them! If you go to the game, I'm sure your dad will enjoy hearing the highlights!! As you said, the nurses are a phone call away......

    Chantal
  • paul61
    paul61 Member Posts: 1,391 Member
    #7
    Options
    Not an easy decision but I would do what Dad wants
    This is a difficult decision, but if it were me I would do what my dad wants. Whenever I have to make a difficult decision like this I always trust my gut over my brain. I have found the feeling I get in my gut takes me in the right direction. I would have to ask, "where would my dad want me to be?". I doubt if your dad would be happy having you sit next to him while he was feeling physically lousy from his symptoms and mentally lousy because you were missing an opportunity that he would love to have.


    Best Regards,

    Paul Adams
    McCormick, South Carolina

    DX 10/22/2009 T2N1M0 Stage IIB
    12/03/2009 Ivor Lewis
    2/8 through 6/14/2010 Adjuvant Chemo Cisplatin, Epirubicin, 5 FU
    Two year survivor

    Life may not be the party we hoped for, but while we are here we might as well dance!
  • Unknown
    Unknown
    #8
    Options
    This comment has been removed by the Moderator
  • Ginny_B
    Ginny_B Member Posts: 532
    #9
    Options
    Never mind about William. He
    Never mind about William. He does this sometimes and it's hurtful rather than helpful. I think he means well though.
  • dodger21
    dodger21 Member Posts: 85 Member
    #10
    Options
    Ginny_B said:

    Never mind about William. He
    Never mind about William. He does this sometimes and it's hurtful rather than helpful. I think he means well though.

    Seg
    Seg,
    I think it depends on whether your dad is an introvert or extrovert. I am extremely introverted and I felt really bad when my mum took days off work or came to my suburb to look after me when all I was gonna do all day was lie there. I felt guilty on occasion for my mum being there while I just lay on the lounge, when she could have been up the coast at her holiday house. Only you know your dad the best and what the answer to your question is.
    Danielle
  • chemosmoker
    chemosmoker Member Posts: 501
    #11
    Options
    BLOOD and NFL
    SEG2426,
    I would do as your dad asked and go to the game. THAT is HIS wish for you.

    As for the blood, I just had 3 transfusions and they have NO idea where the blood went and all, but it sure helped. I wish your dad well and hope he balances out. I vomited for three days and had issues after the transfusions so it may be a normal reaction to the transfusions?
    Keep us posted.


    God Bless,
    Eric
  • TerryV
    TerryV Member Posts: 887
    #12
    Options
    Seg2426's father has passed. Condolences may be shared here

    http://csn.cancer.org/node/234073

Discussion Boards