Just diagnosed....
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lccollins
Member Posts: 10
Hello....just need someone to talk to. I just got results yesterday-invasive ductal carsinoma-1.7cm grade 3. Don't know what any of this means. I meet with the oncologist on Monday. Any advice or things I should know would be so appreciated. I feel frozen with fear. Thanks for listening.
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Comments
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just Diagnosed
Welcome! I am sorry that you have to join us, but you will find no better place to be. There are so many wonderful people on this forum with a lot of personal helps. My suggestion to you is to make sure you have someone with you when you meet with the oncologist. You will have a lot of information thrown at you, that will make you feel overwhelmed. Having a second and/or third person is very helpful also, as maybe they have questions to ask that you might not think of. I send hugs to you, Mary0 -
So sorry.
Oh, Sweetie.
I am so sorry.
Just know that the next weeks are going to be the worst of it because of exactly what you said "Don't know what any of this means." This is the time when you are in shock, terrified and completely in the dark as to what is going to happen next.
There will be a lot of tests. None of which are as bad as you will imagine. My advice for MRIs is take the vallium if you think you need it! It will help relax you and stop you from moving.
IDC is very common, so your doctors have a lot of experience in how to treat it. This is good!
I also was diagnosed with IDC, 6cm, stage 3b in April. I just finished 6 rounds of chemo and will have a bilateral mastectomy on August 18th followed by 6 weeks of radiation. I am a sophmore in all of this. You are a freshman.
Take heart. There are A LOT of graduates out there with good advice and support for you.
You absolutely did the right thing by joining this site! be careful not to google TOO much. It will start to scare you with information overload.
Please keep in touch.
Sending you
!
Vigee (Vee-shay)0 -
First, just breathe.
First, just breathe. Inhale, exhale, and try (not so easy) to relax. Try to take this one step at a time. It is quite a whirlwind and not a good one at the start. I am so sorry that you had to come here but it's a really good place to be for support and to vent, and ask questions. Right now you will get your best starting information from your doctors. They will discuss surgeries, treatments etc. But we can give you an idea how each aspect might be. We are all so different and so our diagnoses. Depending on lots of factors, size, grade, lymphnode invoivement, type of cancer you will be given informoation on type of surgery, chemo, rads, estrogen blockers etc. But again, we are the best group to help you through all of this especially the emotional parts. Hoping this helped. And remember it is perfectly normal to be in shock, to cry, to rant, to be angry, to have any emotionally reaction that you are experiencing. We will keep you in our prayers, think good thoughts, and send cyber hugs to you throughout this journey.
Stef0 -
Welcome to a most supportve
Welcome to a most supportve and informative website. At first it is all so overwhelming. I call it the fear of the unknown. Follow the suggestions made here, try taking it one day at a time and one thought at a time and hang in there. We are here 24/7 with moral support and will try to answer any questions you may have. I consider us a sisterhood, even tho we are all so different.0 -
You'll find the people here
You'll find the people here are caring and supportive. And we're happy to share our advice.
Here's mine...start a list of questions for your doc now. I always come to my appointments with a written list of questions, that way I don't forget to ask anything. One to include with each doc on your team is 'what is the best way to contact you if I have questions later?' Some docs are good with email, some have advice nurses by phone, etc.
I also have a binder with all my information in it, one area for prescription info, copies of reports, FMLA/benefit/job info, a calender, dr. contact info, etc. The tabs in my binder have changed with time.
One more tip...in the blue box to the left is a link for 'cancer information', check it out. It will likely answer many of the questions you have right now.
In my case, once I started taking steps to take some control of this journey that 'frozen with fear' feeling started going away. You have taken that first step by coming here, and it was a good one.
Please come back and let us know how you're doing.
Hugs,
Linda0 -
Hi and WelcomeGabe N Abby Mom said:You'll find the people here
You'll find the people here are caring and supportive. And we're happy to share our advice.
Here's mine...start a list of questions for your doc now. I always come to my appointments with a written list of questions, that way I don't forget to ask anything. One to include with each doc on your team is 'what is the best way to contact you if I have questions later?' Some docs are good with email, some have advice nurses by phone, etc.
I also have a binder with all my information in it, one area for prescription info, copies of reports, FMLA/benefit/job info, a calender, dr. contact info, etc. The tabs in my binder have changed with time.
One more tip...in the blue box to the left is a link for 'cancer information', check it out. It will likely answer many of the questions you have right now.
In my case, once I started taking steps to take some control of this journey that 'frozen with fear' feeling started going away. You have taken that first step by coming here, and it was a good one.
Please come back and let us know how you're doing.
Hugs,
Linda
So sorry you had to find us like this, but as others have already said, the support and information here on this board is awesome. We've all been exactly where you are now and understand your fear.
I also suggest that you take someone with you. On my first oncologist visit, I was still pretty much in shock and wasn't comprehending a lot of what she was telling me. Having someone with me helped me - I asked over and over, what did she say about this or that. As others mentioned, write down questions you have and take the list with you.
Please let us know how your are - we really do care!!
Prayers and Hugs,
Debi0 -
Sorry but glad you are here.
I can't really add much to the good ideas that have already been posted. I was also Dxd with IDC 06/10. I had a L mod rad mastectomy and prophylatic on the right side. I have completed 6 months of chemo and now I am on the herceptin maintenance. I also completed 7 weeks of radiation and one week booster. I'm now on the road to reconstruction. It's been a long process and scary at times but you can do this. Take good notes or have soneone with you you will take notes for you. Make an educated medical decision after you talk with your ONC and decide on a treatment plan. Do not second guess yourself. Let your own body be your guide. Rest when you need to and be kind to yourself. Don't overdue it. Post after you have a treatment plan. Best regards and you are in my prayers.0 -
HI
there is so much coming on in the next few weeks prior to surgery - you must know is a long journey, keep yourself uplifted and positive, it will pass - don't give up, fight, you are always gonna find us here supporting and listening to you and crying and praying with you too, make a list of everything you have to ask to your doctors and an extra set of ears will help otherwise you can also bring a small recorder so you play it back at home, please receive all our love and support0 -
Too much to absorb
And it's all in a whole new language that you never took the class to learn. All of the advice you have been given is soooo good, I have nothing to add. Just want to let you know that I think you will feel much better once you have a clearer picture of what is going on and have a plan to kill the beast. I find that I still go back to the notes of the 1st visit I had with my oncologist to check on questions that I have now 9 months post diagnosis... so don't forget your notebook, and let someone else take the notes. Be sure to write down all of your questions between now and when you go and don't leave the office til you have some kind of answer. My M.O. actually took my list of questions from my hand and read through each one and answered it right then...helped a lot. Now she calls my pink notebook my "peripheral brain" she is used to seeing me with it.
I am sending you positive thoughts as you begin this scary journey,
Jennifer0 -
Hi welcome. We will be a
Hi welcome. We will be a great support to you during this scary time. By the size you stated it sounds like it is not too big which is good. I also had invasive ductual carsinoma but it was larger than yours (I think it was 3.5cm)
I strongly suggest to keep a binder with dividers so you can keep all your reports and other papers neat and easy to get look at or tote with you to doc. if need be. I still check back to read and to also read my journal that I kept during treatment. I am 8 months post chemo. DX was 1yr ago this past June, had surgery middle of aug...then chemo.
If you have any questions just post them and we'll all be there for you.
Hugs,
Annette0 -
Sorry to hear...I would
Sorry to hear...I would suggest to bring 1-2-3 extra set of ears along..my hubby and close friend came along..I remember listening, shaking my head etc etc..and then Dr made one more comment and I LOST all hearing, retaining etc...just a blurrrrrr...
I had alist of questions...good you found this site..I DID not until about 2 yrs ago if that I had had surgery etc..3 yrs ago..I wish I had looked or found this site..
great help...
HONESTLY I never heard any # etc..just DCIS for me...if i was told never sunk in...so I cna't help you what it means...
I WISH YOU the best..
Denise0 -
Hi.
I am sorry you had to join this club. But like everyone stated, this is an amazing community of warriors. I also want to welcome you and to let you know that we are here to support you in anything we can.
Please don't panic - I know easier said than done - but know there is a plan for everything. It may seem like a nightmare now because you have no answers. But you will get through this and recover.
Since you joined us already, would love for you to stay and ask any questions you may have. Please have faith, stay positive, and believe you will be OK.
Let us know how your appt. goes.
Note: ASK questions (write them down in advance); don't make drastic decisions, go home to think, research (we are here too), discuss with love ones, then agree to a plan; bring someone with you to listen. Good luck!0 -
Everyone is pretty much
Everyone is pretty much giving you the same advise I would.
1.Take some one with you. I was in a fog for the first few weeks so I was glad my husband was with me for the doctor appointments.
2. Start a list of questions. You will think of stuff at 2:00 am, write it down then because you will forget by the time you wake up.
3. Breath, this is all very overwhelming! It is for all of us and people who aren't in our shoes don't quite get it.
4. I was never so organized as to categorize stuff but I have a folder with everything in it.
5. Remember doctors are people too. They are part of YOUR team. Ask questions till you are satisfied with the answers. Have them write stuff down if you want, or spell things or what ever. They are there for you.
You started on a good path finding this site. There is no question that will go unanswered, you will find all the hugs and prayers and support anyone could imagine!
You will get through this! We are here to help,
Cindy0 -
Inform Yourself . . . Or Not
My first go-round I had the same problem. I didn't know what any of it meant or what my options were, and I am a person who likes to have all the facts. I had DCIS, according to my pathology report, and I looked all over the internet without being able to find what it stood for! I was sent to a surgeon who had the "trust me, I'm a god of medicine," attitude and he told me what he was going to do. Period. He seemed offended by all my questions. I ended up bolting to another hospital and a different surgeon just days before my scheduled surgery, and it worked out well. But the doctor I ran away from is regarded as one of the best in his field. One of his better-known patients is Maggie Daley, the wife of Chicago's former mayor. Either he was not so rude to her or she is not as information-driven as I am. I know there are people who just want to trust in their doctor and not think too much about it -- and that's fine, if you are one of those people. You should not have to force yourself into more stress by becoming a cancer wonk. However, I do think someone should be asking questions, just in case you are not putting yourself in the hands of one of the country's finest. The advice to take someone else along is especially important if you don't want to deal with details.
You may not be able to do this before your appointment, but if you want to learn a lot in a hurry, run out and buy Dr. Susan Love's Breast Book. It covers absolutely everything.
Good luck. Keep checking in.0 -
Just diagnosed
Welcome to this discussion board. I was in your place just 2 years ago & this discussion board has been a lifesaver to me! Like you, I was frozen with fear. But I made it through treatment. I will say that have BC has changed my life forever. But change is inevitable & I can't say that it has been all bad. Keep us posted on your progress.
My thoughts & prayers are with you!0 -
So sorry you are here, but
So sorry you are here, but I'm glad you've found us:
Things I know now:
Take someone with you if possible
I kept a spiral notebook and wrote down questions, and I tried to write down as much information as I could as she talked. I was in shock, so the other person can take notes for you. Ask for copies of your pathology reports; they didn't make sense to me at first, but they do now. They should give you contact information, but if not make sure you have numbers you need. That can include cancer support groups, the doctors head nurse, etc..If you go to the internet to look up information, I would suggest you look at dates of the information before you read it. The newer information is best of course. Then, stay with this site. It's better to talk to people who have been there, and these ladies have.
Hugs and prayers,
Judy0 -
A few more suggestions
First, as Mollieb told you, buy immediately Dr Susan Love's Breast Book, 5th Edition. It will explain your tests, your type of cancer, your options, and answer many questions that you have today and that you will have in the future.
Start today, write down on paper or type in your computer, any question or concern that pops into your head. The day that you will see your doctor bring two copies of your questions. One will be for the doctor and one will be for you.
Record on a calendar every visit, every test for future reference.
Get a couple business cards of each doctor and keep one set in your purse or enter ALL information (doctor's name, phone, address, e=mail, Fax) in your cell phone. Make sure you have another set at home and that your family knows where they are. Some doctors have difficult names to spell. This way you can refer to your set of cards or your cell phone for the data on your doctor. You are going to be asked this information many times.
Do not be afraid to ask your sisters questions or reveal your feelings. We have all walked the road and we can truly relate to you. Only a sister knows and understands another sister. Only a sister is truly compassionate.
Lots of Hugs,
Janelle0 -
the first thing to rememberpoplolly said:So sorry you are here, but
So sorry you are here, but I'm glad you've found us:
Things I know now:
Take someone with you if possible
I kept a spiral notebook and wrote down questions, and I tried to write down as much information as I could as she talked. I was in shock, so the other person can take notes for you. Ask for copies of your pathology reports; they didn't make sense to me at first, but they do now. They should give you contact information, but if not make sure you have numbers you need. That can include cancer support groups, the doctors head nurse, etc..If you go to the internet to look up information, I would suggest you look at dates of the information before you read it. The newer information is best of course. Then, stay with this site. It's better to talk to people who have been there, and these ladies have.
Hugs and prayers,
Judy
the first thing to remember and tell yourself is that many women live, survive and thrive and you can too. It is not a death sentence. right now can be the absolute worst time,. yOU DONT HAVE A PLAN OF ACTION, YOU DONT KNOW WHAT TO THINK, AND YOU ARE CONSUMED WITH FEAR. tHIS WILL GET BETTER. you will speak to your onc, write down everything, then you ask as many questions as you need, for as long as you need. Make sure the onc is a good fit for you. They will advise you on further testing, to sort out what kind of treatment you need. Remember to be gentle with yourself, good to yourself. This is a vulnerable time. We are in all stages, of this disease and treatment. We are here to support you and we are hear 24/7 You have found a great place but sorry you are here but we will help you get through! HUGS0 -
Dear one - you have come toDifferent Ballgame said:A few more suggestions
First, as Mollieb told you, buy immediately Dr Susan Love's Breast Book, 5th Edition. It will explain your tests, your type of cancer, your options, and answer many questions that you have today and that you will have in the future.
Start today, write down on paper or type in your computer, any question or concern that pops into your head. The day that you will see your doctor bring two copies of your questions. One will be for the doctor and one will be for you.
Record on a calendar every visit, every test for future reference.
Get a couple business cards of each doctor and keep one set in your purse or enter ALL information (doctor's name, phone, address, e=mail, Fax) in your cell phone. Make sure you have another set at home and that your family knows where they are. Some doctors have difficult names to spell. This way you can refer to your set of cards or your cell phone for the data on your doctor. You are going to be asked this information many times.
Do not be afraid to ask your sisters questions or reveal your feelings. We have all walked the road and we can truly relate to you. Only a sister knows and understands another sister. Only a sister is truly compassionate.
Lots of Hugs,
Janelle
Dear one - you have come to the right place. Here you will find sisters
who will love you, support you, listen to whatever you need to say,share
experiences and give any advice you seek. Sisters who are compassionate,
empathetic, intelligent and they have walked this path themselves. Oh,
and the cyber hugs are terrific. The only advice I can add is when you
get a tx plan,share it and believe me someone on the board will have been
through it. I didn't join this group until I was passed my surgery and
chemo and it sure would have been wonderful to have these ladies here who
could have answered my questions about what I was going through with my side
effects, emotions, treatment and fears. Keep us posted and ask questions and
know you are cared for, supported and loved and most of all you are
prayed for.
Teresa0 -
I want to welcome you to thenatly15 said:Welcome to a most supportve
Welcome to a most supportve and informative website. At first it is all so overwhelming. I call it the fear of the unknown. Follow the suggestions made here, try taking it one day at a time and one thought at a time and hang in there. We are here 24/7 with moral support and will try to answer any questions you may have. I consider us a sisterhood, even tho we are all so different.
I want to welcome you to the club no one wants to join, but, since you are here, you will be surrounded with help, support and kindness.
Be sure and let us know what your oncologist says today.
We are all pink sisters, in this together!
Hugs, Megan0
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