“SUNDANCE vs CANCER” – The Results Post

Sundanceh
Sundanceh Member Posts: 4,392 Member
edited June 2011 in Colorectal Cancer #1
Faster than a speeding locomotive – Able to leap tall buildings in a single bound – Look! – Up in the air! – It’s a bird! – It’s a plane! – It’s…..it’s……awww $hit, it’s only Sundance:)

LOL:)

The “Betting Windows” are now officially closed, so I hope you got your wagers down – there was sure plenty of time:)

Well, this is finally the post that I have waited for and waited to write. And also the one that many of you have waited for as well. Almost a year in the making and through it all, it has been a “Watershed Moment” in my journey.

I suppose when I reflect back on it, we could say that it’s the most influential battle of my entire campaign. There was much at stake to be won or lost.

It carried huge significance as I motored on toward my 7th year of this incredible saga. And all the time, never knowing exactly which way the battle was going to go. Would I win? Or would I begin to slip?

The stakes we were playing for was my very existence, which I believe we can all agree, is worth playing for. The difference is we had to fight like there was never going to be tomorrow – because that’s always in the cards and is the key component that weighs so heavily on all of our minds.

It’s a funny feeling looking back on this past year. In many ways, it still feels like yesterday – and then on the other side, it seems like a lifetime ago.

Cancer played a dirty little trick on me this time. We know he does not play fair and is a dirty fighter. He used the DaVinci tumors the time before, to lull us into a false sense of complacency while he stealthily hid behind my lungs and gathered his forces, before he could again announce his presence in my body for this last year’s fight.

When I was still in the hospital after this lung surgery, I remember a nurse bringing me my pathology report. Even dazed on morphine and with blurred eyesight, I could still make out the words…”Colorectal Mets to Lung.”

And I remember thinking, “Now, you’ve showed yourself, you SOB!” I sat up in bed and thought, “I’ve got you now.” You’ve just kicked the sleeping dog – you just woke up the Gentle Giant. So, once again, it was “officially back on.”

Strangely though, I felt some sense of comfort in those words, in the fact that I again knew what I was going back up against….there was no guessing anymore, there it was in the report. It was time once more to “get my mind right to fight.”

Once I found out the surgery did not completely remove the malignant tumors, I knew it was going to a really long and hard road, with no shortcuts. I was going to have to go all in and gut this one out for the long haul, if I was to have a chance at any kind of victory.

You all know there were times when it looked like I was beaten. Down and out for the count is what’s ahead for our good old Sundance, folks were probably thinking – put a fork in him, he’s done. But then again, you don’t know Sundance:)

I’ve always said I may “bend or waver” during the fight, but that I would never “break.”

Maybe that’s not an entirely true statement. Perhaps, it depends on what your definition of “break” is. In fact, Cancer had me beaten and on my knees begging for either “Death or Mercy.” It had me beaten at the time, but not broken for the long haul of the fight.

“The CURE” had me beaten as well this time , but I stayed strong enough to complete the entire protocol “by the numbers.” It was really difficult this time to mentally and physically step through all the obstacles that stood in our way. As I’ve said before, it gets a little harder to keep taking the pounding, the longer you stay in the fight.

The mind and heart are still willing – but the body just doesn’t “bounce” like it used to. I think this is the biggest difference in an old veteran fighter vs the newly diagnosed.

While the surgeries and treatments have compromised our bodies, we learn we must adapt and use our experience and smarts to fight on, instead of relying on a new body that is just starting out.

My medical team continuously put the foot on the gas and we were very aggressive in our treatment plan and there was no time to rest. We relentlessly pursued our target and stayed in the attack mode the entire time.

Oh yes, I can be beaten – I can be hurt – I can bleed – I can suffer. I am just a mortal man, composed of blood & flesh..

However, on the other side of the coin, I can also be tenacious – persistent – stubborn – and relentless in my own pursuit. My horoscope is “Cancer, the Crab.” I’m a “July Baby.”

We’re loveable, friendly, and loyal – but when fuc*ed with, we raise our pinschers and will snap you. We’re a very formidable force to reckon with. When we hit back, it hurts too, just like we were hurt. We only fight when provoked though and let’s face it, Cancer does provoke us, doesn’t it?

Here’s the last topic I wanted to discuss. Let’s talk about our roommate – HOPE.

What an interesting fella’ this guy is, am I right?

He’s very elusive and if we’re not real careful, he can just slip out of our fingertips and just be gone. And when he goes, he’s sometimes hard to find again.

And when Hope moves out, Depression can move in – then he invites Despair, Hopelessness and Loneliness to the party, and from there our lives can disappear and become nothing but existence.

And that’s a very bad place to be – especially for too long. I know, because I spent 9-months with all of those guys this year. They are not nice “house guests.” They try to rob you of that thing that we call “Our Lives.”

And then it becomes up to us to take back back what was so wrongly taken from us. Each of us must do that and find a way to get Hope moved back in with us, so we can flourish and feel optimism.

What is my definition of Hope?

I’ve come to think of Hope as that “Intangible element of humanity that we cannot see, but one that we feel.”

It’s the single common denominator that every single one of us has inside. It’s the driving force behind our individualism and more importantly, the one thing that we “Cling To” and “Reach For” in times of dire circumstances that beset each of us, somewhere in our lifetime.

As the old saying goes, “Let’s Keep Hope Alive!”

Hey, let’s go down to ringside right now, looks like Michael Buffer is about to announce “The Decision.” Who came out on top? Sundance or Cancer?

“Ladies and Gentlemen! The Winner by KO and still the Undefeated Cancer Champion of the World, with a 3-0 title defense, is……….your very own…….SUNDANCE! “

LOL:)

And the crowd goes WILD……….:) !!!

For any of you that bet against me…….”Suckerzzzz!” LOL:)

That’s right folks – 3 recurrences Up and 3 recurrences Down – just like in baseball, huh?

We did it again. We knocked Cancer “Back into the Shadows” once more. He’s gone back into hiding, licking his wounds, while I lick mine. But, we got Him down right now. You read the BAD in my other post…….and now for something completely different, here is the GOOD:

1. Colon and Rectum = Clear
2. Liver = Clear
3. Lungs = All Clear:)

Many of you might recall in my Thanksgiving Message to my Cancer, that I said, “I am down right now – but when I get up, I’m coming – and He11 was coming with me.

Well, with Big Billy by my side, we “Huffed and we Puffed”…and we “Blew the Doors to the Gates of He11 Wide Open!”

What looked like a highly improbable, if not impossible mission at the beginning of this fight, has come to a successful conclusion. I know how fortunate I am to be on the “positive side of the ledger” right now. It sure could have gone either way, but somehow we are on top right now.

We’re officially back to “Watching and Waiting.” I’ll talk to NED, if I make it “clean” for 5-years, with no further recurrences….. (June 2016).

So, it does not get much better than this….am I right?

I thought the balloons were supposed to fall out of the ceiling about now? Why isn’t the band playing? Where’s the cake and ice cream? Where is Jennie with my margaritas?

LOL:)

Since I can’t get to any of you right now…we’ll just have to have a “Cyber Celebration!” I need some folks to share in this joy with me. It will mean more if I have all of you around me in the “same room.”

So, what’s next for Sundance?

I’m going to Disneyworld!...................................Not!

I’ll be lucky to get to Chicago for CP9 – with this very meaningful victory, it is my sincerest hope that I can make it there and get some lovin’ from my honeys:)

What’s next is instead of escaping Cancer, I’m going to jump back into the deep end of the pool and go back to the beginning of the journey and begin writing my book – first chapter titled “The Diagnosis.”

I want to jump on getting this written now, while the wounds are fresh and the feelings raw. I’m excited about making this a reality – now publishing will be another story – coming to an Amazon Kindle near you?

I’ll close this post with these final thoughts…..

On the day that Donna (Shayenne) aka “My Chicky” passed away, I posted on that thread that Her Lion had roared for the final time.

A beautiful chapter in my life and on this board and a real life story of friendship had come to a tragic and painful end. On this day a part of me died with her –Her Lion was dead and gone, and yet the memories still remained, but were now forever buried deep within the archives of the CSN posts.

This is a day where I wished Chicky were still here with us – certainly a story she would have loved to hear about and rejoice in. I will miss not seeing her post in this thread.

In honor of her memory and to bookmark this momentous occasion, Donna’s Lion “ROARZZZZ” one more time:) Miss you, Chicky.

This one was for myself, but also for the Semi;Colon Nation. I stand before you as a living testimony to what Cancer “Can and Cannot” do to us. It will never be easy, but you too can do this. I’ll stand proudly beside each one of you and be with you for each stop in your journey. Don’t be afraid – get mad – get even – and get out there and fight!

I understand less and less as time goes by – have no idea of why I’m still here after 7 years of battling this stuff. Don’t understand why my friends did not make it, but I am still here. I suppose I’ll never know.

And Cancer may indeed catch me one day – but guess what? It won’t be TODAY!!!

All of you know that Sundance is not the kind of guy that “Goes Quietly into the Night.”

I carry all of your hopes and dreams with me in my heart. I have the deepest respect and admiration for each one of you here – both past and present. You are the finest group of people I know and I’m proud to know you all.

All of you are Winners – and Cancer will never, ever take that away from you! With all of the love I can muster, I thank you for staying with me and you are all in my thoughts, in my heart, and in my dreams. Semi;Colons Rock!

I SALUTE YOU!!!

Craig and Big Billy
“Team Sundance”
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Comments

  • tina dasilva
    tina dasilva Member Posts: 641
    Craig
    Oh Craig I have tears of happiest for you my dear friend how awesome is that kicking cancer @ss awesome love ya tina
  • Patteee
    Patteee Member Posts: 945
    yeahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

    yeahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
  • idlehunters
    idlehunters Member Posts: 1,787
    YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!
    Hey NED.NED..NED...NED...NED....!!!!!!!!!!! Yippie...YAY! WOOT WOOT!!! Muthafrukner!!!!! OMG!!! I am soooooooooooooo friggin excited!!!!! You bet your sweet arse you are going to be at CP9...Dude...we are gonna drink the crap outta them Margarita's...heck ya!!!!!

    Celebrate...celebrate..dance to the music...NAKED!!!!!!!

    Love you Craiger!!!!

    Jen
  • Kathleen808
    Kathleen808 Member Posts: 2,342 Member
    Craig
    Craig,
    First AWESOME!!! Second, you are one hell of a writer. I so wanted to jump to the bottom of the page and read the results but I did not want to miss one of your incredible words. Bring on the book!!!! Celebrate!

    Aloha,
    Kathleen
  • Annabelle41415
    Annabelle41415 Member Posts: 6,715 Member
    Wonderful
    You have got great news. You inspiration and courage has touched my heart. So glad for your results.

    Hugs! Kim
  • Fight for my love
    Fight for my love Member Posts: 1,522
    OMG,finally I can take a
    OMG,finally I can take a breath,I was extremely worried about you.I cheer for you,and I love this news soooooooo much.
  • Lovekitties
    Lovekitties Member Posts: 3,364 Member
    Hip Hip Hurray!
    Balloons by the hundreds are falling!

    Every band is playing "For he's a jolly good fellow"!

    The cake is a mile high and the ice cream needs a truck to hold it!

    They say everything is bigger in Texas, but nothing is as big as this win for our Sundanceh!!!

    After the party, do get busy on that book. There will be a publisher and book signings in your future!

    Hugs,

    Marie
  • Kathryn_in_MN
    Kathryn_in_MN Member Posts: 1,252
    WooooHoooooo!!!
    Fantastic news!

    Even though it is chemo weekend and I don't have much energy, it is finally warm here, so I am doing the nekkid happy dance for you! (No photos - too scarey!)

    ;)
  • LivinginNH
    LivinginNH Member Posts: 1,456
    Oh Craig, I can't tell you
    Oh Craig, I can't tell you how very happy I am for you - you've made me cry again - but interspersed with little chuckles of happy laughter. (Does that make any sense?) OMG, what a great thing to read before I fall asleep. Love and hugs!!!! Cynthia. :-D
  • donnare
    donnare Member Posts: 266
    Wonderful
    Great news Craig ... so happy for you!
  • Nana2
    Nana2 Member Posts: 255
    I was reading this aloud to
    I was reading this aloud to Jim and choking back tears. I am sooooooooooooooo happy for you. You are an inspiration. I am going to get a bowl of ice cream right now and celebrate with you! Do the happy dance!
    Love from Jim and April
  • WooooHoooooo!!!
    Fantastic news!

    Even though it is chemo weekend and I don't have much energy, it is finally warm here, so I am doing the nekkid happy dance for you! (No photos - too scarey!)

    ;)

    This comment has been removed by the Moderator
  • tootsie1
    tootsie1 Member Posts: 5,044 Member
    GREAT!!!!
    Oh, what wonderful news! I'm SO very happy to read this! You're awesome in so many ways, Craig, and this is just the most welcome news!!!!

    *hugs*
    Gail
  • Buzzard
    Buzzard Member Posts: 3,043 Member
    tootsie1 said:

    GREAT!!!!
    Oh, what wonderful news! I'm SO very happy to read this! You're awesome in so many ways, Craig, and this is just the most welcome news!!!!

    *hugs*
    Gail

    Craig.........
    You Are Tha Man !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!buzz
  • marqimark
    marqimark Member Posts: 242
    Buzzard said:

    Craig.........
    You Are Tha Man !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!buzz

    Great
    Though I have only just been introduced to you, I am very excited to hear your great news!
  • pete43lost_at_sea
    pete43lost_at_sea Member Posts: 3,900
    see you in june 2016
    dear craig,

    your victory is priceless.

    your tenacity will save lives, it is. think about the hope you generate.

    you cannot fail.

    will you come to the greenside, not the darkside.

    it maybe a great time to invest in craig health bank.

    one day that investment maybe the weapon that kills the last crc cell.

    one day in my alkaline nutrient rich body i'll just poo away the last crc cell and flush it straight to hell.

    sorry i am now about as extreme as it gets here in terms of diet and alternatives. its just an invitation. i will love and respect you for what you have given me and all of us.

    love hugs and health,
    pete
  • mukamom
    mukamom Member Posts: 402

    see you in june 2016
    dear craig,

    your victory is priceless.

    your tenacity will save lives, it is. think about the hope you generate.

    you cannot fail.

    will you come to the greenside, not the darkside.

    it maybe a great time to invest in craig health bank.

    one day that investment maybe the weapon that kills the last crc cell.

    one day in my alkaline nutrient rich body i'll just poo away the last crc cell and flush it straight to hell.

    sorry i am now about as extreme as it gets here in terms of diet and alternatives. its just an invitation. i will love and respect you for what you have given me and all of us.

    love hugs and health,
    pete

    What a great
    way to wake up to this fine day!!! Wonderful news. You ROCK!!!

    Dancing for you

    Angela
  • MrsJP
    MrsJP Member Posts: 157
    AWSOME!
    I have tears of joy for you my friend...You are an inspiration to us all.

    JP
  • rogina2336
    rogina2336 Member Posts: 188
    All I can say is "WoW" what
    All I can say is "WoW" what a story. Goooooooooooooo sundance. Kim
  • jjaj133
    jjaj133 Member Posts: 867
    Hip Hip Hooray!!!!!!
    It's is hard to type when you can't see the keys. I am sobbing from relief and joy. What hope you have given all of us, your words touch our hearts and souls.We will look forward to your book with great anticipation.But before you start that, Please celebrate your brains out!!!!!!!

    "And Cancer may indeed catch me one day – but guess what? It won’t be TODAY!!!'
    This is my new mantra, thank you Craig and Big Billy